


Life is unfair

by Ladate



Series: Life is unfair [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alpha Tony Stark, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst, Bruce Is a Good Bro, Denial, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Manipulation, Emotional Roller Coaster, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Enemies to Lovers, Eventual Romance, Everyone Has Issues, Explicit Sexual Content, Friendship, Fucked Up, Gender Issues, Hurt Tony, Lots of Angst, M/M, Mpreg, Natasha Is a Good Bro, Not so Alpha Steve Rogers, OOC Steve Rogers, OOC Tony Stark, Out of Character, POV Steve Rogers, Physical Abuse, Self-Acceptance, Self-Harm, Self-Loathing, Some Kind of Happy Ending, Steve really needs a hug, Tony Needs a Hug, Trying to be healthy, Unhealthy Relationships, Unreliable Narrator, Virgin Steve Rogers, a lot of drama, eventual pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-31
Updated: 2018-04-04
Packaged: 2018-08-12 06:08:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 28
Words: 84,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7923496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ladate/pseuds/Ladate
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony is an asshole and Steve may be a little bit in denial. Tony is Alpha and Steve is, well, not really Alpha but that is a secret.<br/>This is a long suffering path from hate to love. In a world where gender defines your life, where biology controls your body, Steve is trying to figure out who he is and what he wants from life.</p><p>It was supposed to be funny but it turned out very angsty.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Steve smells funny (and also he really really hates Stark.)

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Oversight](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7067470) by [ShyOwl](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShyOwl/pseuds/ShyOwl). 



> This my first time at writing ever. This is not beta'd. I was inspired by many excellent works I read here, but mainly Oversight. 
> 
> Also, English is not my native language and I don't use it on a regular basis. As much as I try to check in the dictionary, there's bound to be some mistakes. There're probably a lot of words that are inaccurate or simply wrong or not appropriate and some sentences that are flawed but I tried my best. Please be nice.
> 
> The introduction is a lot longer that I wanted it to be but it seemed necessary. I hope you enjoy it.

It had all started because of Tony Stark. 

 

Steve was a nice person. He was nice to everyone. He had a good heart. He was the kind to forgive and accept people’s faults, because, you know, they’re only human (well except for Thor but Thor doesn’t count does he? ) Steve was like that, a nice person; always trying to find excuses to people when they made mistakes, even his enemies. He liked everyone, well, every one… except Tony Stark.

 

First, Tony Stark embodied every thing that Steve hated in a person. He was a bully, he was a show off, his ego was as high as his fortune, he was reckless and destructive, he was a play boy… every thing that Steve hated in an Alpha. Because of course Tony was Alpha, and not just any alpha. Pack Alpha, the best kind. The kind that every omega wants to submit to. The kind that would take more than one omega as a mate so they could impregnate them and spread their seeds around to assure their domination, like ancient times. The kind that was made to rule, no, not rule, dominate and dictate. 

 

And Steve despised that kind of Alphas, he had his own idea of what a true pack Alpha should be like. A noble one, a true hero, a leader that would be admired, respected and followed because of their noble courage and qualities not because they subdue people with force and fear. One that would mate only one omega and love and cherish and protect them and their family for the rest of their life.

Steve was of that kind, or at least, he tried to be. Tony was everything but that.

 

Well, it’s not that Tony was a dictator, not really. Of course, he did have the best suite in the tower but it kinda was his tower. He definitely kept the best for himself but again it kinda was his money. And yes, maybe he was ordering people around a bit but never during a mission. 

No one could deny that he took really good care of his pack, really. Steve couldn’t argue with that. Even though each day passing by he was regretting even more the day when he had accepted his already prepared (really comfortable and arranged to his taste) suite in the Tower as a permanent residence, Steve had to admit that he also had good points. Really, Steve couldn’t deny him that. He might even be able to treat his mates as well as he treated the rest of his pack. Maybe. 

 

Tony did not have mates though… It’s not that he couldn’t have one or even more than one. Every unmated omega wanted Tony Stark. Even Betas and some Alphas were trying to get their hands on him. It’s just that no one was worthy of being his mate. He would only use his sex partners to satisfy his urges and needs and then throw them out like garbage. Never he would commit to one of them and certainly not an omega. He despised omegas. He considered them as inferior. He thought they were greedy, and did not deserve his respect. He treated his lovers like whores and got rid of them as soon as he could. Yeah, thinking about it, he really was the worst kind of assholes. Unlike Steve, who would definitely love and respect his mate if he actually was interested in having one.

 

So Tony was the worst asshole but that wasn’t the reason why Steve hated him so much, not really.  Steve really hated that Tony was the highest rank of Pack Alphas, but what he hated even more is that he felt weakened by Tony's power. And so, since the first time they had met.

 

Ever since he had woken up from the ice, Steve had been fairly happy. Of course he had needed time to acclimatize to this new world with all the new technology and the important social changes that had occurred during those 70 years he was at the bottom of the ocean. Unexpectedly, he had adapted quite well and quite quickly to this new way of life. Steve felt good in this world where gender had significantly lost importance, where biology didn’t dictate your life, where you could mate whoever you wanted without too much judgement. 

Well of course he would feel nostalgic sometimes and he would cruelly miss his friends and family: his mom, Bucky, Peggy, Howard… That never lasted long though, because he had a new family now, a team of very good friends. People who had his back and respected him and acknowledged him. That and also because now he as the Alpha he had always wanted to be : a real hero. A noble one. And he had the life he had always wanted to have: saving lives, being useful, fighting bullies and making the world a better place.

 

It’s not that he wasn’t a hero before. He had indeed earned the respect and admiration of many during WWII. It’s just that there was the war and he hadn’t been in the real world as Captain America at that time. Now, however, after 70 years, he was a legend. A true hero who inspired all America. 

Yes, Steve had been so happy that he had almost forgotten his little secret. That is, until he met Tony Stark. 

 

Steve had been a little excited when Fury had talked about Stark's possible participation to the Avengers project and the reason why he had been refused. Okay so Steve had read his file after that and he must admit that he was a little disappointed when he learned about the man. Still, that was Tony Stark, his good friend Howard’s son and a genius. 

 

When he watched him walk toward him. He could sense his Alpha power. So strong, so powerful. Even more powerful than his father. And handsome too. No wonder he had success. Really, one of the great. Steve could feel his heart beating a little faster, with excitement (what else?) They would be able to talk a lot, they would remember Howard together. Steve really was excited about meeting Tony Stark.

So, of course, he would be a little unsettled when Tony had sniffed him (really, who does that nowadays) and said « How disappointing! » instead of shaking Steve’s hand when he had introduced himself. He looked at Tony in the eyes and saw contempt, no _disgust_ even.

After the shock of the encounter, Steve felt his heartbeat grow stronger and his face getting hot. Oh no, he was blushing with embarrassment. How could he show such a weak side to Pack Alpha Tony Stark on their first meeting. 

Soon then, embarrassment was replaced with fear. Did he know? … How could he? Did he sense it? 

No one, since the serum, had sensed it. No one had showed him so much disrespect. No one had questioned his authority, even if most of his team were Alphas too. 

He panicked. Why? Even so, Howard knew and he still respected him. So why? Now, he was angry. 

 

« You’re nothing like your father! » Steve shouted. Eyes glaring and face red with anger. Steve needed to assert himself. He was Captain America, he was Alpha, he was a hero and he led the Avengers. No one, not even Tony Stark could disrespect him like that.

 

Useless to say, their first meeting didn’t go very well.

 

Neither did the second, and the third… Tony Stark constantly bothered him, mocked him, insulted him. He used stupid nicknames. He disregarded his authority. He ignored his orders. And also… 

 

Steve really hated Tony Stark. And he kept wondering. Does he know? He even doubted his good friend Howard who had sworn secrecy. Could he have told him? No, he wouldn’t. Still, Steve felt uneasy. There was something about Tony Stark that made him uneasy. He didn’t know what quite exactly. Every time Tony mocked him Steve felt threatened and was losing confidence. He felt like his position as leader was being questioned and that worried him. But there was also something else that worried him. Tony wasn’t only making fun of him, he was… god that’s so embarrassing… he was _flirting_ with him. So yes okay Tony was flirting with everyone, and yes that was probably part of making fun of him (especially when Tony’s favorite game was to make his born-in-the-40s self blush like a little omega girl.) 

Every time, Steve couldn’t stop the unsettling fear that grew inside of him. _He knows what I am._ And every time, Steve couldn’t do anything about it. It was like Tony was revealing his true self. And that, was what Steve was the most scared of.

 

Steve needed to protect himself, his position and his reputation among his friends as well as the cohesion of his team.  So when, once again, Tony ignored his orders, was reckless and put the team in danger, Steve was beside himself. However, the confrontation didn’t go quite as planned. And really Steve shouldn’t have provoked him. « Take off the suit what are you? » Because, really, without the suit Steve could beat the shit out of him anytime. Pack Alpha or not. He was just, you know, a nice, non violent guy that’s all.

«  Genius, Billionaire, Playboy, Philanthropist » Tony deadpanned. And that really is what enraged Steve. Tony cared so little about him that he even dared not feel anything when Steve tried to insult him. « That doesn’t give you the right to disregard direct order from your captain! » Steve replied with self-confident calm and posed but really angry superior Captain America voice.

Tony smirked « Why should I take orders from you? You’re not even Alpha! » Steve’s heart stopped. His face went white. He knew. So his not so good friend Howard must have betrayed him then. « You don’t smell Alpha! » Okay maybe his good friend Howard had not betrayed him.

Steve defended himself. « What are you talking about? And what does it matter? » Because it shouldn’t matter now, right? It’s the 21st century. And also because Steve couldn’t really say a blatant lie, could he? « I am your Captain, I am your leader, I give order and you must follow them Pack alpha or not! » The war was declared.

 

"You shouldn’t let it bother you!"  Natasha said while he was changing. "It doesn’t matter that you don’t _smell_ alpha. It doesn’t make you any less of a leader. And a very good one per say. Every one here would agree. It’s all crap anyway this alpha ruling thing. Times are changing."

 

« I know… » whispered Steve, still upset. « It’s just that, you know, deep inside, I’m just that little kid from Brooklyn… And… I know that… that the Serum altered my scent… »

 

« Don’t listen to Stark, Steve. He’s a bully. You’re our favorite Captain and the best leader we could ever wish for. »

 

« Thanks Nat! »

 

« Sure Cap! »

 

Except that, it really really bothered him.

 

 

You see, Steve was an anomaly in this world. He was Alpha, that he was sure of. He knew he was. He had always known who he was and who he wanted to be. He had always known what he was made of. He had always known he could make a difference were he given the chance to. He was Alpha. A true noble Alpha hero. He was just born with the wrong body that’s all.

 

His childhood had been a bit difficult. Not only was he born Omega but he also was born with a puny and sick body. Not the slightest attractive, which kind of was convenient though, because there was no way he would have ever submitted to any Alpha. Especially, when he was an Alpha himself. 

 

Steve had planned his whole life when he was a kid. He was Alpha and he would be a hero no matter what. And maybe when the world would finally acknowledge him and accept him as the Alpha he was inside, he would find a cute and nice Omega to love and cherish and start a family. 

And he would never let any Alpha stand between him and his goal. Okay, so...  there _might_ have been quite a few alphas who actually stood in his way but nothing really serious, nothing that had dishonored him. Bless him. 

 

He had been quite the late bloomer. His scent hadn’t been that strong and he really had lived only three heats before the serum. And no it wasn’t because his body was sick, no matter what the doctors said. It was because he was Alpha. Of course that would disturb his cycles. Everybody knows that the hormones are deeply connected to the mind. 

 

And really, despite what his mom said, he knew he was Alpha. And he wasn’t the only one, as a matter of fact. His good friend Bucky knew it as well and respected him as such. So okay Bucky was beta but no judgement here and Steve was definitely not someone who would judge people based on their gender. 

 

There wasn’t only Bucky. When he met professor Erskine, he too, had noticed the Alpha inside him. And Howard. And Peggy. They all knew about his omega-ness and they respected him as Alpha nonetheless. When he met them he knew that he would attain his goal, finally. The Serum was exactly what he needed. Finally, he could be himself. Finally he could live his life the way he had always wanted, the way he was supposed to. He didn’t not hesitate once.

 

The serum altered his smell and erased the Omega scent off him. And, it had modified his cycles, it seemed, because Steve had never been in heat not even slightly since the serum. The serum had enhanced his Alpha-ness, Steve was sure. He was certain now, even if he didn’t really smell Alpha, that there was not even an ounce of Omega in his body. And that really was a relief. He didn’t have to tell the truth to anybody. Especially now, that all the people who actually knew about it were all dead.

 

Steve wasn’t quite Alpha though, not only he didn’t smell Alpha, but also he seemed completely unaffected by the Omega scent. He was genuinely not interested. So what if he wasn’t attracted to omegas? That’s not what being Alpha is about. Not really. And who cares if he didn’t want a mate. Who needs a mate anyway? Steve would be perfectly happy without a mate in his life. Besides, he was made for greater purpose, like saving the world. He was perfectly happy sacrificing himself and his future conjugal happiness to the greater good. He was a noble hero after all. 

 

Therefore, Steve was not omega. He was certainly not beta. And, he was not exactly Alpha. Hence, an anomaly in this world. But that really was okay especially in the 21st century because now he wasn’t the only one. Now there were quite a few people who would fight these kind of prejudice. Transgender people now were acknowledged and were even able to be cured with treatments and operations. Omegas could become betas and Alphas could become omegas. Really Science progress was amazing. Also, life wasn’t that hard for Omega people, they could live quite a normal life with the suppressants for their heats. Life was easier. Now gender was not that important anyway. It was even quite common to see Alpha-Alpha mates or Omega-Omega mates (though rarer and really Steve had no idea why…) 

No, really, him being born Omega was a non-issue in this world and even being asexual (understand not interested in mating - there were also quite a few people like that…) and a virgin really was not an issue. And Steve wasn’t going to let Tony F….ing Stark (Yeah Steve was polite like that) belittle him and bother him constantly because of that.  He decided that he would no longer pay attention to his annoying hurtful remarks and would certainly not be affected by the flirting. But really Steve should have known better.

 

He should have known better and he really should have recognized the signs. Really. That was all Stark’s fault. It was because Stark flirted and because he was annoying and also because he was… you know Stark. Nevertheless, Steve should have recognized the signs…

 

… 

 

Steve was in the common living room, on the couch, reading a book. Alone. He was actually enjoying the calm and peaceful around him. No Clint to eat like a pig, no Natasha talking with her feet on his knees, no Bruce constantly trying to scan through him, and most of all, no Tony.

It was relaxing and the book was funny. He didn’t have to suppress his laugh. (And his blush, because the book was quite moving as well.) It was one of those days that Steve felt really happy about his life. 

 

He was so focused on his book that he didn’t notice Tony when he entered the room pacing lightly on the wooden floor. Tony came from behind and sniffed on his nape. Steve turned his head toward him and looked at his face, puzzled. He was too surprised to say anything.

Tony stared, his pupils dilated. The Alpha look. Steve froze and slowly lied down on the couch, mesmerized by Tony’s Alpha stare plunged into his eyes. Tony kept sniffing his neck, the tip of his nose brushing slightly his skin and sending shivers down his body. Tony jumped the couch and settled above him, his hands on each side of Steve’s body and flexed his arms slowly to the point where their bodies were touching. He was resting his weight on his forearms and sniffing Steve all over his neck. Steve felt hot suddenly and couldn’t move. Not that he couldn’t really, he could have pushed Tony off him and thrown him across the room without forcing, if he had wanted, he just… couldn’t.

Tony stopped and looked at him, his face coming closer to his. Their nose touched, and Steve could feel Tony’s breath on his lips. His wide pupils plunged into his eyes. Steve couldn’t breath. He sniffed again.

 

« You smell funny! »

 

« What? »

 

And he was gone.

 

Steve took a moment to catch his breath and process what had happened. Damned Tony and his annoying flirting. He hated him, he hated him he really really hated him.

 

Steve didn’t think about it much though. Tony was just flirting, wasn’t he? And what if he had been slightly affected by it. He was really just caught by surprise that’s all. 

Yeah. Steve definitely should have known better.

 

The thing is, Steve didn’t really thought about any of the signs much. 

 

He didn’t think much about Clint who pushed him down and blocked him on the floor for quite a long time, the whole weight of his body on his chest and between his legs, looking at his face with dilated pupils and caressing his cheeks during a sparring session. So what? He had said sorry and laughed it off « Really Cap! Stop harassing me sexually! you’re not my type »

Steve had grinned, he liked Clint a lot. Very funny guy. He had always made him laugh.

 

Nor did he think much about Natasha who stared at him with a sly smile, her hands on his pectorals, slightly caressing him in the elevator. Natasha was touching him all the time and there wasn’t any sort of sexual tension in the atmosphere this time. Not really. Was there?

 

He didn’t think about it much when Clint groped his ass in a really sexual way at breakfast.

Or when Sam gave him a long slightly embarrassing and very sweaty hug which, maybe, had lasted  longer than a normal bro hug after their usual running session together. There was definitely a hugging situation there, and Sam did definitely _not_  let his hands slide on his ass.

 

He didn’t think much about all of his Alpha teammates suddenly feeling very touchy and protective with him. He didn’t notice when Tony constantly invaded his personal space and barked at any of the other alphas who would dare get too close. That was normal Tony. Absolutely normal flirty annoying and really clingy Tony. 

And most of all Steve really did not pay any attention to the growing and accelerating frequency of these non-incidental occurrences. His teammates loved and respected him. That’s all.

 

Steve didn’t notice Bruce’s (who is not Alpha by the way) doubtful look at the whole situation. Also, it might have helped if Bruce had actually said something at that point because…

 

Steve should have paid more attention to the signs but Steve didn’t care about the signs because they were absolutely not signs. Why would there be any signs at all? 

 

Steve was definitely _not_  Omega, and he certainly did  _not_ emit Omega pheromones, and he was absolutely _not_ about to be in heat. 

 

So why then was all the peaceful and friendly atmosphere of the Tower suddenly destroyed? 

Why were the love, the affection, the support, the help he had received here, all the funny and happy and sad moments he had spent here in company of his friends which had made this place a home to him (despite Tony’s annoying presence) all gone? 

Why were his teammates, his friends, his _brothers_ going at each other’s throats ? and for _him?_

 

This was a FUCKING (yeah, Steve could be less polite when absolutely necessary) disaster!

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really wish you could leave a comment if you liked it or if you didn't like it. Especially, if you didn't like it. I'm all for negative comments, if they are constructive and helpful. 
> 
> Do not hesitate to correct me. I really want to get better. Also I think the title is very lame but I couldn't come up with anything, if you have other suggestions...
> 
> (and yeah, I realized that I use the word "really" way too often. )


	2. Maybe Steve is not Alpha after all (and really he smells good)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve's friends are acting really strange and his body is feeling weird. He doesn't know what to do about it. Poor Steve.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't been really nice to Steve.... I know. It's because he's my favorite character.

This was an absolute disaster. How could he have been so _stupid_! Stupid, stupid, STUPID Steve!!!

This couldn’t be true. This could NOT be true. Why didn’t he pay attention to the signs???

 

It all started during movie night. Well no it actually started at dinner. Okay maybe it had started a little before dinner… 

 

Steve had changed into a T-shirt (maybe a little tight on his chest but that shouldn't be a problem, right?) and sweat pants for their usual training with Clint and Natasha. He came out of his suite to join Natasha to the elevator. He bumped on Bruce on his way who turned around and looked at him for quite a long time, with a questioning look. He didn’t say anything though and turned back to head to his own room. Steve thought it was quite odd but didn’t dwell on it. Natasha was grinning at him at the end of the corridor, her arms crossed. As he was getting closer he noticed the strange look on her face. She had very dark eyes and her grin was kind of lascivious. 

 

« Nice shirt! » She said languorously « Really suits you. » That was just a shirt. One he had been wearing plenty of times before. Why compliment him now?

 

Steve smiled at her and they both entered the elevator. Natasha was staring and not exactly at his face. Then she put her hands on his chest and started to caress him slightly and she pinched his nipple. 

 

« Ouch! » Steve lied a little. He wasn’t really hurt. On the contrary, he kind of liked it. But he was never going to admit that. « What are you doing? You’re crazy! » 

 

Natasha laughed as a reply and looked up to meet his eyes, her pupils were completely dilated. Suddenly, her arms were around his neck and she was caressing him. She rested her head on his shoulder and she sniffed him. « Mmmh. you smell so good, Steve. »

 

« Nat? … Natasha? »

 

She rubbed her head up against his neck until her lips were next to his ear. Steve shivered as he felt her breath brushing his ear. « Ready to get your ass kicked, babe? » 

Babe? Seriously what was wrong with her today…

 

The elevator dinged and they entered the training room. Clint was turning in back on them, waiting. As soon as they arrived, he turned around and stared at Steve. He looked hungry. He stared for so long that Steve felt embarrassed and started blushing. He came closer to him. His hands went straight to his right cheek. Caressing. His thumb sliding down to his mouth. 

 

« You’re sparring me today, Stevie. » Clint said, his voice low and determined and he winked. 

Stevie? Really? What was up with them today…? Clint strengthened his grip on Steve’s head and brought him closer to him while his right hand came to his flank and up to his pectoral and his thumb caressed his nipple slightly. A shiver went down Steve’s spine at the touch. And suddenly he felt a little hot. He felt embarrassment cover his face with a blush but didn’t move or say anything.  

Natasha, however, did. Clint’s arms were kicked off Steve’s body by two sexy legs. 

 

« Get your hands off him. He’s sparring with _me_. » She growled at Clint. 

 

« No way! Steve’s not yours. »

 

« He is not yours either. Back off! »

 

Steve looked at them with astonishment. He didn’t do anything at first because he was dumbfounded. But as soon as he realized the incongruity of the situation he got really angry.

They started fighting each other and that could have become ugly quite soon. He needed to separate them. But somehow, he couldn’t move. He shook off this feeling and tried to protest.

 

« Stop it now! What’s wrong with you??? Have you gone crazy? I’m not sparring with any of you until you behave. I don’t know what you two have been taking but your attitude now is not appropriate. Really… » Really, Steve didn’t know what to say. He was a bit embarrassed and somewhat apathetic. He decided to leave. It’s not like they couldn’t train tomorrow.

 

Steve went back to his room to sulk. He was clearly annoyed by Clint and Natasha’s behavior. But he was even more annoyed by his own reaction or rather his lack of reaction. Why didn’t he stop them? And why didn’t he do anything to prevent their fight? And what was this thing that he felt at their touch? Steve was really angry now, at himself. He tried to draw a little to take his minds off things but that didn’t really work. He was too bothered to concentrate. He was shaky and he felt hot. He decided to take a cold shower and spent the rest of the afternoon playing with a ball and trying to calm himself down but he was too restless. 

 

Tonight was movie night and Sam had invited himself over for some pizza before. Steve was usually happy when Sam came to their movie night. But he just wasn't in the mood today. He was still bothered by his teammates’ behavior earlier. Well, okay, he must admit that he was more embarrassed than bothered but still. He dreaded a little the dinner. And let’s face it, he was so not in the mood for Tony’s flirting right now. 

 

He waited until the last moment to meet everyone else in the kitchen. Jarvis had to remind him twice that he was expected and the pizza was getting cold. He didn’t have any excuses not to go… Damn!

 

Steve penetrated silently the room. He wanted to be as discrete as possible. Failed. As soon as he passed the entrance, all his teammates turned to him at once. Glaring. Agitated. Silent. Suddenly, there was so much tension in the room that Steve felt very small and fragile. He wanted to crawl into hole and hide there. Instead he just stood there, not knowing if he should speak or move forward and say hi to his friend or run away. So he didn’t do anything. Natasha, Clint and Sam looked like they were going to eat him up. Their mouths slightly open, breathing heavily. Tony wasn’t there yet. That was something at least. It was Bruce who broke the awkward silence. 

 

« You alright Cap? »

 

« Yeah… Yes. Sure. Hi Sam! » the words faltered out of his mouth.

 

« Hey Buddy! Looking really Sexy tonight. Come and give me a hug? » Sam grinned. 

 

Sexy? Was he for real? He was wearing old sweatpants and a much much looser shirt than earlier today. What was sexy about it? And seriously, what was up with Sam and hugging lately?

 

Steve didn’t move. He looked at Bruce who seemed kind of worried now and was assessing his friends. 

 

« Hey, he’s gone all shy now. Come on babe. Pizza’s waiting. And I’m _reaaaally_ hungry tonight. » Clint snarled. 

 

This was a living nightmare.

 

Steve felt powerless and hot and unable to move and maybe a little affected. Natasha stood up and came toward him swaying her hips about like a cat. Steve felt like she was going to jump him. That’s when Tony decided to make an appearance. 

 

« Back off ! » Tony growled at them. « Rogers’s mine! » 

 

The two Alpha males sat back on their seats and Natasha froze for a second and then walked back to her chair as well. They all complied to Tony’s dominance. Tony had claimed him. He was pack Alpha and of course they wouldn’t override his authority. Steve was safe for now, what a relief. And Tony had claimed him. Shit! Shit! Shit! No! Shit! There was no way that he was gonna be Tony’s not once, not now, not ever. He hated Tony. He really hated him.

 

But Tony came behind him and wrapped his hands around his chest and rested his head on his shoulders for a few seconds, signing heavily against his back. 

 

« Oh Captain, my Captain. What have you done now? » Tony whined behind Steve blowing hot air on his back. 

 

Steve felt really good in Tony’s arms for an instant but quickly shook the idea off his mind. He knew what was happening now. He didn’t want to believe it but he couldn't deny it any longer. He felt so stupid and so reckless now for getting himself into this pathetic situation. He should have anticipated. He should have planned for it. He should have been able to prevent it. Oh my god. What was gonna happen to him now? What was going to happen to the team? There were no safe way out now. Steve knew it and he couldn’t do anything about it. He barely could resist Tony’s Alpha power overwhelming him. He felt safe and protected and wanted to stay exactly where he was. Steve really needed to escape now.

 

« Tony » Steve asked.

 

« Hum? » Tony muffled still buried in Steve’s shoulders.

 

« Tony » Steve repeated a bit louder.

 

« What’s wrong Cupcake? » There it goes. And that nickname was really lame. So why did Steve’s heart jumped?

 

« Tony let me go now »

 

« You’re not going anywhere now » Alpha voice stated.

 

Steve tried to be rational. He could maybe still escape this if his will was strong enough. He would go in his room and hide there until it’s over. The Alphas would stop scenting him and would go back to their normal self, right? Right. Now he just needed to be strong and resolved. 

 

« Please let go. I need… I need to go… » 

 

Bruce who had been watching the scene silently tried to help Steve in his escaping.

 

« Tony, I really think you should let him go. Let him go. » The voice was soft and soothing as if Bruce was trying to tame a wild dog. 

 

« Shut up! Beta people like you should know their place. This Omega here doesn’t need to go. This Omega here needs to eat to be in good health. Now all of you shut up and move you asses to make space for my Omega who needs to eat now. »

Tony was calling him _Omega_ now. He was not even considered as a person. He really hated the man.

 

Bruce opened his mouse to protest but then decided that maybe it wasn’t the best time to offend A Pack Alpha when surrounded by three alphas of the said pack,  in rut because of the presence of a particularly strong smelled Omega soon to be in heat. So instead he sat back and looked at his plate. Really. What a wonderful movie night. The three alphas moved obediently to one side of the table so that Steve and Tony could take a seat. 

 

Tony caught Steve by the shoulders and turned him around to face him. He looked up to meet his eyes. Pack Alpha or not, Steve was still taller and broader than Tony. Not that much but still enough for him to lift his eyes to be able to meet Steve’s. Tony’s pupils were wide. He spoke slowly and resolutely. 

 

« Now, Capsicle, you go to the table, you sit patiently at the table like a good boy and you wait for me ok? »

 

There was _no_ _way_. Steve was not going to comply like a dog just because an Alpha was ordering him around. He was Captain America. No one ordered Captain America and certainly not Tony F… Stark. (No need to be rude here…) Who did he think he was ? Steve was Alpha. Okay maybe not so much right now but that was just temporary. Steve was not going to that table to eat that joke of a dinner. This was absolutely ridiculous. Steve would have laughed at the absurdity of the situation if he wasn’t so angry and bitter and feeling sorry for his pathetic self and the fucked-up situation he let himself into. They were civilized people. Not dogs, not wolves, not animals. People.

 

« Yes Tony. » Steve answered looking down.

 

« Good. good boy. Go sit now. » 

 

Tony patted him on the head and Steve felt a bit of satisfaction for being a good boy. But he forced himself to forget his thought and went to the dinner table and bent his head down. Waiting for Tony. Tony sat down just after he did and served everybody their pizza. Steve ate his slice without looking up at the others, snuggled up against Tony as if to be kept safe. 

Tony started joking around and soon loosened the tension in the atmosphere. They started to talk almost normally. Tony had claimed him and the three alphas had backed off, for now. Tony had claimed him but he wasn’t marked. He hadn’t mated him yet. He was not his and so, the other alphas could still claim him too. None of them were mated and so they were all very sensitive to his scent. Once his heat starts, they would fight for him. Steve knew that and that is why he had to go now. But he couldn’t. He was complying, unconsciously waiting for his Alpha to give him permission. Bruce was participating to their conversation but was giving a quick worried glance to Steve from time to time. This was not going to end well. Steve was sure. And he felt really hot. He wanted more contact with Tony’s body and snuggled closer and he felt shivers all around his body when their skin touched a bit. And, oh my god, Steve really needed to get away now.

 

His body was becoming hotter and he started to feel a warmth in his belly. He was slightly shaking. His head was falling on Tony’s shoulder and his vision became a little blurry. And Tony smelled good. And he wanted Tony to touch him and oh god no. He couldn’t possibly want Tony to touch him. Tony was the last person he wanted to be touched by. And let’s face it, his thought were less and less rational otherwise he would have noticed that the discussion was heating up and that the Alphas were more and more aggressive toward each other and that now. They were trying to touch him. 

 

This is when Steve found the strength to get up. He had to go or it would be over for him. He rushed off the table, stumbling a little because his legs were shaky and he felt weak on his knees. It didn’t matter he had to go. Tony tried to grab him but Steve found enough strength in himself to push his hands away violently. Tony was caught off guard and let him escape his grasp. Steve stumbled toward the door. He was going to get away. Yes!

 

His pitiful attempt to get away from 4 alphas in rut didn’t last very long and Steve was suddenly on all fours, head on the floor. Above him Sam who was pining him down. One hand on his neck, the other trying to unbutton his own pants. And Steve suddenly pretended to be unhappy about the fact that he was wearing sweatpants which was way easier to get access. He regretted bitterly (or happily) not wearing jeans which would have given him a lot more time. Sam was growling and rutting against his ass. He could feel his cock against his hole and wondered if the saying about black people was true. Thinking about it got himself really wet and moaning like a slut. Geez he was really done for. In a sense it was a relief that it was Sam. Sam was his friend. They would forget about it afterward right? They would laugh it off on their run. And nothing would change between them. Right? Oh fuck! Not Sam. 

Unfortunately, or fortunately it depends on the point of view, Sam was not going to be the one. Natasha came quickly and kicked Sam in the guts and pushed him away. 

 

« Don’t you dare put your filthy hands of him. You’re not even living here. You have no right to claim him. »

 

Sam was writhing in pain on the floor and arms on his stomach. And Steve felt really cold and really sorry for himself and for Sam too. (Well if he was being honest he felt more sorry for himself.) Right now his heat was starting and he was not thinking straight. The only thing he wanted now was touching and something hard in his ass to feel him up. His ass was wetting and loosening on his own. He wanted to submit to an Alpha. Any Alpha and please them. 

 

Natasha came to claim her due and stood in front of Steve who was still bent over the floor. Ass up and shaking. A huge stain of juice on his sweatpants. His cock was rock hard and probably leaking. 

 

« Do not even think about it, woman. » Clint growled, or maybe, it was Tony?

 

She gripped his hair and lifted his head and pressed it against her pelvis, rubbing it slightly. She smelt good Steve thought. He put his hands on her hips rubbed his nose against her pubis. He wondered how she was going to do to fuck him but was still excited about it. Except that Clint, that was definitely Clint this time, came and punched her in the face. Natasha stumbled on the side and hit her head hard on the wall and slid down with shock. So Clint then, but Clint didn’t get the time to grab Steve. 

 

« Hands off Alpha. The omega’s mine. »Tony’s powerful Pack Alpha voice growled. 

 

Tony threw a vase at him and Clint stepped back holding his face in his hands. Sam grabbed his feet and made him fall. They started hand fighting on the floor. 

 

Steve crawled towards the wall to get away from the fight. He curled up against the wall and started touching himself slowly. He should have been horrified to see his friends trying to strangle each other. But instead he wondered if the winner was going to strangle him too. He thought that he might like it.  He should have been sad, or angry and ashamed to see his friends going at each others’ throat  but instead he felt pleased and proud that they were fighting for him, for his ass. And he promised himself that he would reward the winner by satisfying all their desires. No matter what. He couldn’t explicitly imagine it at this point though, since he was still a virgin But the idea excited him even more and he started touching his ass which was burning with desire. His sweatpants were damped and he was now leaking his slick on the floor. His ass was so loose that he had already three fingers rubbing inside, his other hand on his cock, holding it tight, his thumb caressing the slit on his head slightly. He wasn’t going to come without his Alpha’s permission. 

 

Natasha woke up from her momentary haze and attacked Tony. Bruce tried to separate the four  Alphas before one of them becomes seriously injured. Bad move. Really Bruce? Why? Too late. Bruce got punched on the face and hulked out. Tony called the suit. This was a total disaster. Steve got a glimpse of sanity suddenly. He couldn’t let this happen. With Hulk raging and Tony with his armor there could be murder and never ever would Steve be able to look at himself in a mirror if that happened because of him. 

 

Steve found in himself the strength to fight his desires and get to the door. The four Alphas were busy with Hulk now and didn’t pay much attention to him. It was the opportunity he was waiting for. He had to go. NOW. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So next chapter: Steve is going to be alone in the streets at night and in heat...


	3. Steve is really really stupid. (and also Tony is not always an asshole)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve is a little bit horny.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See at the end for warnings. (spoiler)

Steve staggered to the elevator, pressed the button and threw himself inside. He collapsed on all fours. He was breathing heavily, trying to find the determination in himself not to go back to the Alphas. He felt so hot and his ass was so demanding that it hurt and his cock was ready to explode. His skin was itching all over, begging to be touched. He needed to go as far away from here as he could. He considered going to his room and lock himself there and then he changed his mind. What if the Alpha could still sense him there? They would follow him and smash his door open. And if they didn’t, would he be able to resist the temptation to join them? Steve wasn’t so sure now.

He hesitated « Ja…. JArvisss… »

« Sir? » the British accent of the AI replied.

« Get me out here… now… please. » The words came out as a moan.

« Of Course Mr Rogers. »

Gradually Steve felt his resolution stronger, his mind clearer. He was getting away from the Alphas and was not overcome by their power. He could control himself better now. By the time he got down, he could almost walk normally. He was afraid that Tony might have noticed his absence and ordered JARVIS to block his way out but he apparently had not because Steve was able to get out of the Tower just fine.

Once outside the fresh air cooled his very hot body down a little and reinvigorated him. He couldn’t think of anything about sex though so he started to run to try to sweat out his thoughts off his body. He ran and ran and ran until a wave of heat came through his whole body and made him waver. He stopped a second to catch his breath. He was still as horny, as hot, as wanting as before. He wanted to scream his pain out. Why? Why was this happening to him? Why now? Why here? Why was he born like this? Life was so unfair.

He felt his body shiver more. Alpha. There were Alphas close by. He looked around him for a while. He didn’t recognize the street. Where was he? How long did he run? He resumed his run which was more of a staggering trot. He felt his ass warming with want and the cool air freshening him where his sweatpants were still wet with his juice. He reeled his way to a back alley, trying to hide maybe; and went to rest his head against the walls. His knees were weak and he kneeled down to the ground. His body was trembling, his chest breathing heavily as another wave of heat shivered through him, washing away every ounce of self control Steve had. His ass slicked again and his cocked jolted. He could sense Alpha getting closer. Three, maybe four. Oh no.  
Steve’s actions lately had been really questionable and his choices reckless, but going out of the Tower while in heat was by far the most reckless, stupid, unadvised choice of all. Now he really hated his stupid pride and his stubbornness. How could he have been so stupid? Of course Alphas had scented him. He wanted to avoid being taken by one his friends, and now he was going to be taken by a stranger, maybe more.  
As far as he knew, his friends were never mean to him, even if they had claimed him, they were also trying to protect him, from one another, but still protecting. It wouldn’t be the case with strangers. He would even be lucky if one of them claimed him. They might just use him. They would take turns, share him and dump him like a used sock.  
His mom had warned him about that when he was going to have his first heat. How risky it was for an unmated Omega to be alone and unprotected during their heat. He didn’t want to believe, he had blatantly refused when his mom wanted to lock him up. Fortunately, Bucky had reassured him about the necessity of it and he had finally come around. Alphas in the neighborhood could still scent him and came bothering his mom.  
He was lucky he had only three heats before now. The first two, he had been locked up by his mum. He was proud at himself because he was able to keep his self-control. His heats were not as powerful as today though. His third happened after his mom had died, Bucky had taken care of him. Suddenly he missed him terribly. If he had been here, he would have helped him, he would have been sensible about it, unlike him. He would have warned him about the signs earlier and none of this would have happened. And now he was probably going to be gang raped by three Alphas and a beta.  
He could sense them clearly now. They were close. They didn’t even hurry toward him. They knew he wouldn’t run away, not in this state. He was still on his knees, his head resting against the wall and his hands holding himself on each side of his head. He was so hot, his ass leaking, his cock jolting painfully in his pants. He was so wanting that he couldn’t stop his moaning coming out his mouth. He wished he had a cock or two in it so at least he wouldn’t hear himself whining embarrassingly. He could feel tears rolling down his cheeks. He was crying now. He couldn’t stop himself from crying. He didn’t even know if he was crying from the painful desire burning his body up or about the shitty situation he was into right now, or both.  
He heard them laugh. They were really close.

« Look at that. What do we have here? » One voice said. And Steve shivered at the Alpha tone of it.

« Hello Babe! need some help? » Another one smirked.

« Don’t worry, honey, we’re gonna take really good care of you, now. » A third one slurred.

« Wow, look at the state of him! Such a slutty omega! » this one was not Alpha. How humiliating!  
He was even going to be taken by a Beta.

They must be quite surprised to see him like this. It was quite unusual these days for Omegas to be fully in heat, with the suppressants and all; let alone, outside, in a dark alley by themselves. He was just the best of treats and he had given himself to them, on a plate. He was picturing himself: Captain America with his slick wet sweatpants down his knees, getting manhandled by four men. In a dark alley in a sordid part of the city. If he hadn't been actually living the situation he would have bitterly laughed. But right now, he was just whining and crying and begging, shaking his ass. He was going to be gang banged, for his first time. He could have prevented it. He could have fought them back and he would have knocked them out without any difficulties. But he knew at this point that he was going to let them do whatever they wanted with him. He even felt some relief as they would help him stop this pain. He kept crying and really wished they wouldn’t recognize him or it would be the end of him.

He could feel their hands on his skin and shivered at the touch. One of them cupped his jaw in his hand and turned his body toward him. He stepped closer and pulled his head to his crotch. He was still wearing his jeans but Steve rubbed his face against it, sighing lasciviously, mouth open in anticipation. There was nothing more he wanted right now than his cock in his throat, mouth-fucking him. It would be his first, but he kind of knew that he would like it. He felt humiliation at the thought of it. He didn’t want to be that person. « Damn, that one’s really first class. Look at this body. Look at this face. You really want it boy, huh? » Steve looked up at the man, he couldn’t see his face in the dark, he strongly wished it was the same for them. And now his mouth was on the man’s underwear. He could feel the shape of it despite the fabric. He sniffed the male Alpha cock and thought it was a nice smell. God damnit Steve!  
His rear end was being taken care of by four dexterous hands. His pants were down. They caressed his cheeks and one hand was slightly brushing his hole with the thumb. « What a sweet, sweet ass. We’re going to ravish it, slut. Don’t worry. » And then he had felt the man’s crotch, still wearing pants, rutting against him, rubbing his trapped hard cock between his ass cheeks. He wanted it inside of him now. He was stretching his back up and shaking his ass. The three men were about to give it to him. Wait. The three men? They were four. Steve detached his face from the Alpha’s cock trapped in cotton fabric to look on the side. Camera. If he had thought, until now, that his situation couldn’t be worse, he had been wrong. But the worst part was: He was too horny to worry about it.

He didn’t have to though. A shiny thing flew rapidly over to them. The men stopped their doing at the surprise and looked at the thing. Steve looked up to see why his Alphas had stopped taking care of him. The flying shiny thing stopped, hanging in the air. The street lights were glistening on it. It was red and gold. Tony.

The iron man’s voice ordered the four men to stop. They tried to protest but that didn’t last long. And soon, there were four bodies around Steve, who was still on all fours on the ground, pants down, ass wet and body shaking. Even if a very small part of him was disappointed, it was a huge relief. He was saved. And his virtue was still safe.

Steve hoped that they had just passed out. Tony wouldn't have killed them, would he? Steve prayed that Tony was able to keep a little bit of self-control when he was in rut. He didn’t want him to become a murderer, especially not because of him.

« Don’t worry Cap! I’m not affected by your scent inside the suit. Air-filter. » That was a relief and it was a nice feeling to hear Iron Man’s voice calling him « Cap. » It felt like battle. It felt like home.

Steve was still unmoving, paralyzed with lust. The metal fingers pulled up his pants. Steve should have been embarrassed, Tony was seeing him in such a humiliating position, but somehow he didn’t feel that. The gentleness of his touch, the delicacy of his moves, the concern he had about his well-being enveloped his heart in a sweet warmth. Something a lot different than the warmth of the heat he was still feeling. For the first time of his life, he felt safe and protected, so much that he could abandon himself completely.  
Tony took Steve in his metal arms, princess-like. Steve put his arms around Iron man’s neck and rested his head on the metal shoulder as they flew away.

Steve remembered the fourth man, the words stammered out of his mouth « To… To Tony… Cam… Camera. »

« Taken care of. » The Iron man voice replied.

« The… The others? »

« It’s alright now. Everybody’s fine. They have some cleaning up to do, but they’re fine. You don’t need to worry about it, pal. »

Steve felt his all body relaxing at the news. He was so relieved that he almost didn’t feel embarrassed. He thought he could abandon himself to Tony’s Alpha power just a little bit longer.  
Tears started rolling down his cheeks, silently.

« It’s okay, now, Steve. You’re safe now. Everything will be alright. I promise. » Tony had called Steve by his name for the first time since they had met.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: There might be some sexual violence. I did think about an eventual Rape warning but I didn't think it was justified. Maybe it is. Let me know and I'll add it.
> 
> Also, next chapter: Steve's first heat with the serum did not exactly happen the way he had expected.


	4. Steve is going to pop his cherry (or is he?)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve is not dealing very well with his heat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is what I meant when I said it turned out a bit sour...

The flight didn’t last long but Steve was in a strange peaceful state, half horny, half relaxed, half conscious and it seemed it would never end.

During the flight Steve had time to think about what was going to happen next. He was accepting it. He had accepted it already. So, Tony would take him. Tony would be his first and even though he hated the guy he would have hundreds of Tony instead of anonymous sex in a dark alley with four not very nice men. So Tony was not so bad after all. He had been nice and kind and it felt good being taken care of. Steve felt safe with Tony. He felt safe now, and he had felt safe earlier, back in the Tower, at dinner. He had rested his head on him, had indulged himself in his scent, had let himself being overwhelmed by his power and felt content.  
So yeah, Tony wasn’t that bad after all, and handsome too. Steve had always thought so. He had felt his heart jumped a little when his had seen his dark dominant eyes and his handsome clean-shave-goateed face on the picture in his file. It was because of the resemblance with Howard he had thought but now it was maybe time to stop being in denial. He had thought so too when he had met him for the first time.  
You had to admit. Tony Stark was the real deal. The best Alpha Steve could have hoped for. He was probably very experienced and would make Steve feel good and hopefully he would take care of him afterward. Tony was like that, he was pack Alpha after all and he had not been that bad at taking care of him so far. And Steve hated him a little bit less right now. Oh god, he wanted him so much.  
Steve was ready now, he couldn’t deny his omega body any longer. He had no choice but to accept it, even if he was an Alpha at heart. It would be just during his heats anyway. The rest of the time he was Alpha, wasn’t he? It was just sex. And Tony was far from being an idiot. He would understand, he would know that these were not his real feelings. This wasn’t going to change their interactions in the future. Steve was sure Tony was smart enough to not let this change their relationship. Their work-relationship, at least, because there wasn’t much more of a relationship between them. Steve was sure that Tony wouldn’t let this affect their work. The Avengers were far too important to Tony to jeopardize that. And Tony would not use this to make fun of him later. It was true that Tony was always making fun of him, but only about trivial things, not important things. Not this. Tony wouldn’t joke about this. Steve was a little worried but he had accepted it. Not that he couldn’t do anything to prevent it anyway so he’d better accept because it would be easier for everyone. So yeah, it was just sex. They were gonna do this. Tony was going to do this for him, as a service, because Tony takes care of his pack. And when it’s over, they would never talk about it anymore. And they would keep hating each other like before, as if it had never happened. Steve hated Tony with all his guts. This would not change anything, it was better like that.  
Steve kept worrying over what was going to happen next, and tried his best to reassure himself. Well actually, Steve really pretended to be worried to focus his mind off what was really bothering him right now. Because, right now, wether he would be able to keep some sort of relationship with Tony afterward or not, was the last thing on his mind. What really mattered now was him, Tony, and a lot of fucking, because despite the cool air of the night, Steve’s body was on fire.

When they arrived, Steve noticed they were not on the Tower rooftop.

« We’re not on the Tower. »

« Nope. The Tower is too dangerous right now. There are still three Alphas who reacted pretty strongly to your scent and I must tell you, your scent, is pretty darn strong. »

« Where are we? »

« In my parent’s mansion. It’s just going to be you and me tonight, Steve. Just you and me. »

Steve felt happy about it. Even if his fellow avengers knew exactly where he was, who he was with and what he was doing, it was good to know that they wouldn't be at hearing distance. And also, Steve thought that it was a little bit romantic, especially for his first time, but he quickly denied that thought.

« Bruce is going to check on you first thing in the morning though. » continued Tony. Great. Yeah. Maybe that might be necessary at some point.

The Iron man suit carried him princess-like to the entrance door. It was highly embarrassing but at his point he could afford a little bit more embarrassment, particularly when his knees were so weak and his legs shaking so much that he wasn’t sure he would be able to walk properly.  
Tony carried him inside and Steve tried not to think about how they looked like a married couple and tried to deny the heartbeat in his chest. Steve assumed these feelings were a natural process when in heat and they would definitely go away when it’s over.

Tony carried Steve into a bedroom and laid him on the bed. He showed Steve the bathroom door of his room and asked if Steve needed anything. Steve needed to be fucked hard.

This was it. Tony was finally going to fuck him. For real. Steve felt a wave of heat through him again. His body, that had been going a little bit numb during the flight, was just right back on it. Steve felt his juice leaking in his already damped sweatpants. His ass was throbbing, craving to be filled. His face was going red with lust and embarrassment. His breathing was heavy and his hands were shaking. His cock was painfully hard and dripping on the dry side of his pants. All his body was burning. Steve couldn’t stop his hand to grab his cock while the other naturally slid to his rim, rubbing it. His hole was loose and Steve had already slipped two fingers in it. He watched Tony, still in his armor. He was giving himself to him. He looked up, mouth open, in total submission, completely offered to his Alpha. Tony didn’t move for a second and touched the inside of his thigh slightly with his metal fingers and Steve felt a shiver down his spine.

« Tony… » Steve pleaded. « Aren’t you taking the suit off? »

« No. » Tony answered dryly.

Steve felt a lump in his throat and he was sure that disappointment could be read on his face. Tony despised him so much that he wouldn’t even take his suit off to fuck him. Steve felt so humiliated that he wanted to cry.

« I won’t be able… to control myself without the suit. »

« But … » Steve tried to protest.

« But no ‘but’. We’re not going to do this, Captain. I’m not gonna take you tonight. »

Steve felt so humiliated. He had submitted to his Alpha. He had offered himself. He had let himself be in the most embarrassing state to please him. And now, his Alpha rejected him. He didn’t want him. He denied him. Steve felt suddenly empty and dirty and useless. He felt his anger grow inside of him and spread in his body like poison. He tensed and sit up to get closer to the armor. His body was hot and red with rage and desire. His body and his heart hurt so much right now. He felt his tears coming to his eyes and couldn’t stop his enraged sob.

Tony headed a soothing hand to his cheek.  
« Don’t cry Captain. I’m doing this for you. This is not what you want. »

How could he know what he wanted. This was exactly what he wanted. He didn’t want anything else. And never in his life he had wanted something as much as he wanted this. And why did he keep calling him ‘Captain’. He wasn’t his captain tonight. He didn’t want to be his captain tonight. He wanted to be his Omega. He wanted to be his mate. He wanted to be his whore, his property, his hole for him to use and satisfy him. He wanted him to fuck every holes of his body with every parts of his body that would fit in. He put his feet on the floor and cocked his head toward the Suit’s crotch.

"Please… call me Steve."  
« Alright Steve, I’m gonna go now… I’m gonna give you this… »

Steve wrapped his arms around the suit and holt it tight. His head resting on the crotch.

« Please Tony… Don’t go. Please. Don’t leave me now » Steve was crying a lot now. His voice jerked with sobs.

« I can’t Steve. I can’t stay in the room with you like this…. I just… I just can’t Steve. »

« Please Tony. This is what I want. Please. Please Fuck me. I need this. I need it so badly. »

« You’re not thinking rationally. »

Steve knelt down on the floor and looked up to the Faceplate, begging and whining. His eyes swollen and blurry with tears.

« Please Tony. I’ll do anything you want. Please. I can satisfy you. I can. Please don’t leave me like this. »

Tony looked at him and helped him back to the bed. then he gave him a box of pills.

« I’m sorry Steve. But I can’t do this. You’re gonna have to take care of it yourself. These are suppressants. Take two now. And Two every two hours. Should do the trick. »

Steve looked at his Alpha, incredulous. He was not going to leave him here, like this. He couldn’t possibly leave him alone, in this state when he felt so vulnerable. He couldn’t.

Tony turned around and opened a drawer in the furniture behind him. He took two long objects, One black and one pink, and threw them on the bed in front of him. Looking at them closer, Steve noticed that they were some king of huge plastic cocks. Suddenly Steve felt his anger rising and burning his cheeks.

« And if your hole’s really hungry. That might help. » Tony had said and he left him.

Enraged Steve took the big black toy and threw it on Tony’s back. « ASSHOLE!!! » He shouted.

Tony stopped but didn’t turn around to face him.

« I’m sorry Captain. Bruce will be here to check up on you at 7 tomorrow. Until then, I’ll be in my room. I’m gonna give you some privacy now» The Iron man’s voice was slow and monotonous.

« I HATE YOU!!! » Steve shouted, and then he repeated « I hate you! » But this time his words choked in his throat. Tony was already gone. Steve burst into tears and tried to muffle his sobs in the blankets.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Steve is trying to figure out what he's feeling


	5. Maybe Steve doesn’t hate Tony as much as he thinks he does. (Also, this is really embarrassing)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Aftermath of Steve's first heat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not really used to writing as you must have noticed. I didn't realized how long it would take to write the story I had in mind. So it's probably going to be a 20-more chapters story.   
> It's gonna take a while before Steve and Tony have a relationship. So you're warned.

When Steve woke up that morning, at 6, he was exhausted. He was also horny. His body was still hot but his thoughts were rational now. The night before hadn’t been the best that he’d had. It was an eventful, painful and humiliating night that was probably going to change a lot in his life. He tried to process what had happened. 

He was actually still omega and now his friends knew about it. And he dreaded their reactions to the news. How could he look them in the eyes ever again? He had probably lost the best friends he could have ever had.

He had almost been raped by four strangers on the street and that really was disgracing but that wasn’t the worst part.  The worst part was that Tony had seen all of it. And even more humiliating, Tony had seen him letting it happen, wanting it, enjoying it. A flush of embarrassment and shame covered his face and he buried it in his sheets as if to hide from the world. 

And Tony had seen more, he had seen a side of him that he didn’t want to show to anybody, that he had forgotten existed, that he didn’t want to acknowledge. Tony had seen him raw and weak and begging and pathetic. Now that he was thinking straight. He was thankful to Tony. He was grateful that he had not used him. But at the same time, he was still horny and he still wanted it. He still wanted him. And there was a little part of him that was pained at the rejection. A little part of him that thought that he hadn’t been rejected out of respect but because he was hated. 

Tony was certainly on the other side of the door. He would have to go. He didn’t want to. He didn’t want to see him. He couldn’t see him. Not now. Not ever again. 

Steve tried to think of a way to avoid Tony and then remembered that he was Alpha. He could face Tony and he would face Tony, because he would face his fears and worries with courage and he would take responsibility for his own actions, even if he would die from shame. Also, he was hungry.

 

Steve decided to head for the door, he didn’t remember well the house from yesterday but he smelled breakfast and followed the trail. Tony was grilling toast. He had his back to him. He wasn’t wearing his suit. 

 As soon as Steve entered the room Tony sensed him.

 

« Good morning Captain ! Feeling better? » he said joyfully and called his armor at once. « Simple precaution, he said, It’s just that you’re still in heat and even if your scent is weaker than yesterday I can smell it and you have to say Captain that your pheromones are really powerful. » 

 

« Yeah, a little better… I didn’t use the … you know what you gave … me. »  

 

« Oy Cap, no need to tell me anything, dear. Look, you did what you had to do. And whatever you like is fine. I don’t care about you kinks. I’m just worried about you’re well being here. »

 

Tony was back to his useful teasing self and Steve felt a little relieved. He watched all the pieces of the armor rushing to his body and settling in the right place. In 10 seconds, Tony had become Iron Man and he was still turning his back to him. And Steve was thankful that he couldn’t see the embarrassment on his face.

 

« Thank you » Steve whispered. 

 

Tony chuckled inside the helmet.

 

« Wow. What have I done to deserve a thank you from the great Captain America? Don’t worry about it, Cap. You’re pack and you’re a teammate. We have each other’s back. You’d have done the same for me or for any other of our friends. »

 

« Yeah, I know » Steve said shyly. « I mean thank you for … not taking advantage of me yesterday. I mean. I was … »

 

« I know Cap. I know. Like I said. Don’t worry about it. Not an issue. You did give us a little bit of a scare though, but everything’s fine now. And really I know that I’m an asshole but even I wouldn’t take advantage of a teammate, especially not you, in those circumstances. No matter what you think, I care about the team. »

 

« Why especially not me? What’s wrong with me? »

 

« Geez Captain, nothing’s wrong with you. Especially not you because you’re our Captain and a little stiff and because you’re a virgin but really, nothing’s wrong with that. »

 

Steve felt his face becoming hot. He looked down to hide his embarrassment  even though Tony couldn’t see him. 

 

« I can see you blushing from here, Captain. » Tony giggled. And Steve blushed up to his ears.

Then Tony turned around and came close to him. Then he gently pressed his metal hands on both Steve’s arms and held him tightly

 

« I know what you’re thinking, Cap. And really It’s okay. You don’t need to be embarrassed or ashamed or whatever you’re thinking right now. It’s not you. It’s not your fault and nobody is going to give you a grief about it. I mean you clearly looked as surprised as the rest of us. Now don’t worry about it… » 

 

« Yeah. It’s just… I… Thank you Tony and… about us… »

 

« Nothing’s changed about us, Steve. But, let’s not talk about that now. You and I we can discuss it another time. When you’re yourself again. For now, just focus on getting better. Okay, we’ll have the talk, if you feel the need, I promise. But not now. Now, it’s all about you. »

 

Steve looked at the faceplate, trying to guess Tony’s expression behind the deadpan helmet. He felt a lot better now. And Iron man’s firm but gentle grip made him feel safe. The same feeling he had yesterday night. Tony opened the faceplate and stared down at him, a serious look on his face. Usually Tony had to look up at him but with the Armor, he was slightly taller.

 

« Nobody is judging you Steve. _I_ am _not_ judging you. » 

 

Steve was enraptured in Tony’s Alpha gaze. He felt extremely hot suddenly. He felt his ass wetting and his cock was half hard. Tony’s look faltered and his face blushed a bit. He quickly closed the faceplate down on his face and wrapped his arms around Steve’s body.

 

« Everything’s gonna be okay. I promise. Bruce’s gonna be here any minute now. He’ll help you dealing with this. »

 

Steve rested his head on Iron man’s shoulder and hold the suit tight. He started rubbing his cock against the armor, whining in pleasure, and Tony never let go of him. 

 

 

… 

 

 

When Bruce arrived, Steve was still holding Iron Man and was still horny. 

He hailed his hand toward them. « Cap! Tony! » 

Tony released Steve and turned to him «  Bruce ! » 

Steve looked down. Extremely embarrassed and still horny. Bruce didn’t judge him either. He was nice and professional.

 

After some breakfast, they quickly went to a medical room upstairs and Bruce examined him a bit, took some samples. Steve was relieved that Bruce’s arrival had slowed down his arousal, also Bruce was Beta and his scent didn’t turned him on like Tony’s did. 

 

« So, How are you Cap today? »

 

« I’m fine. I mean… I’m feeling better. »

 

Steve had to take off his clothes and lay down on the examination table. He was doing his best not to have an erection, which had obviously nothing to do with Bruce or the situation. He was just so hot and so horny all the time.

 

« You’re still horny, right? You’re still in heat. »

 

Steve didn’t not answer the question. He was avoiding Bruce’s eyes and did his best to control himself.

 

« Look, I’m not judging you and I won’t ask intimate questions unless it’s necessary. Okay? I’m here as a doctor. » Bruce insisted. 

 

« Yes » finally answered Steve.

 

« Did you take the suppressants? You know, like Tony asked you to? »

 

« Yes, two pills every two hours. »

 

« And? »

 

« Well, I did’t really…  feel any changes? »

 

« That’s what I thought… »

 

« Look! I’m gonna ask you a question. It _is_ kinda intimate. You don’t need to answer if you really don’t want to. But that would help me if you would… »

 

« Okay… »

 

« How many times did you have to come to feel better last night? »

 

Steve hesitated. 

 

« I… hum… Tony gave… »

 

« I just need a number, Captain. »

 

« hum … twelve…. Twelve times. »

 

« Huh huh… I see… »

 

Then Bruce asked about his other heats. How many times. How long. When. etc…. Steve answered the best he could. He was a little worried about the future now.

 

« I’m gonna run some tests now. You can put you clothes back on. » 

 

« Thank you Bruce. »

 

« Sure.  No problem. »

 

Steve got up. He wanted to leave quickly and headed toward the door. He was still horny and he needed to take care of himself. But this examination felt a little bit awkward. Even if Bruce was nice and didn’t say anything. Steve could feel some kind of tension. He needed to clear the air, so he walked back in.

 

« Bruce? »

 

« Steve? » 

 

« I’m really sorry. »

 

« It’s okay. »

 

« No, I really am sorry. I… I never meant for this to happen. I didn’t know. I … I never thought… You know … Ever since the serum I never had… So I thought… I am Alpha, Bruce I am. »

 

« It’s okay Steve, really. It’s just, it was bit unexpected, that’s all. You should have told us but… Listen, I am at fault too. I noticed things. I knew something was wrong. I should have come to you and ask you. By the time I understood what it was, it was already too late. So don’t torment yourself about it. And no damaged done here, so… Well except for Tony’s living room but you know him, he’ll be delighted to redecorate it in no time. But Seriously now, you should maybe stop being in denial. It would help greatly. »

 

« What do you mean? »

 

« Never mind, we’ll discuss it when you’ve got a clear head. »

 

« How is everybody? »

 

« Everybody’s fine. Worried though, about you. »

 

« Will they… »

 

« They don’t hold a grudge Steve, it’s fine. Well… Clint might be a little angry with you right now but it really is because of the lying, well, the not-telling-the-truth… He’ll come around. Sam is really ashamed for having… hum… assaulted you. Natasha is really worried. Nobody cares that you’re Omega or whatever, Steve. Nobody cares. You being an Omega is not an issue. You’re the one having issues here. So stop racking your head around it. Anyway, I don’t want to bother you with that now. We’ll discuss it at the meeting. For now juste get yourself together. »

 

« What meeting? »

 

« We have a meeting in 3 days with Fury at the compound. We need to discuss certain things on how to handle this. Plus I think it will be a good thing to talk about the aftermath of the incident to avoid any lingering awkwardness between us. »

 

« Fury knows? »

 

« We had to tell him, Steve. After the incident. We couldn’t possibly keep that to ourselves, could we? »

 

« I don’t see how my Sexual life can be SHIELD’s business. »

 

« It is when you decided to hide such an important part of yourself and, by doing so, jeopardized the cohesion of the team. And it’s not SHIELD, it’s only Fury. Nobody else needs to know if you don’t want to. »

 

« I am really sorry. »

 

« I know you are. And we’ve been lucky. It could have ended badly. Now pull yourself together and get better soon. We’ll see each other later for the results. »

 

 Steve felt really bad about his discussion with Bruce. He really fucked up this time. He knew that.  He spent the rest of the day brooding in his room and waiting for the end of his heats. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed. Please let me know. :) (Also tell me if you didn't)
> 
> Next Chapter: Steve is going to hear some bad news and Bruce is being a good friend.


	6. Steve is in denial (and Bruce is a really good friend.)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve learns about his heats

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is basically a long conversation between Steve and Bruce about genders. No Tony in this chapter.

By the end of the day, it was over. He came down to the kitchen where Bruce was waiting for him with dinner.

« Where is Tony? » 

 

« Don’t know. Left this afternoon. Never came back. Chinese? » Bruce held him out a box of Chinese noodles.

 

Steve was starving so he happily took the food and tried to dissimulate his disappointment. He started eating in silence.

 

"Feeling better?" Bruce started. "How did it go today?"

 

"Hum... Yeah... Okay." Steve was obviously not in the mood for small talk and Bruce noticed so he didn't insist.

 

« So let’s talk business. » Bruce announced with a friendly smile. « I’m sorry but I think you’re not gonna like what I have to tell you. » Steve wasn’t really surprised.

 

« So, I’ve run the tests and this not really good news. »

 

« Get down to it. »

 

« Well, first. It seems the serum enhanced significantly your heats. » 

 

« What does that mean? »

 

« Well I’m sure you noticed that, the effect were a little bit stronger than usual. »

 

« Yeah? » 

 

« Your heats are 8 times more powerful than the usual. It affects you greatly and changes your state of mind and takes away all your rational thoughts and your will. Your pheromones are very strong and you’re emitting 8 times the normal emission. No wonder the Alphas went all crazy. Your heats last much longer than usual. Normal heats last from 4 to maximum 8 hours. Well, yours lasted about 24 hours. »

 

Steve dropped his head in despair. « Could it be any worse? »

 

« Actually it is… The suppressants you took, they were the most efficient and the strongest on the market. Well, they didn’t work on you. It seems the serum annihilates their effect immediately. »

 

« Which means? »

 

« Which means that you won’t be able to control your heats. You will have to do it like old times, Steve. I’m sorry. Moreover, it seems now that you are emitting all the time, not enough to affect anyone but enough for you to smell omega. Also you might react to Alphas even when you’re not in heat. »

 

« Is that all? »

 

« No, I’ve been trying to figure out why your heat suddenly started after years of inactivity. I’ve formulated different hypothesis about it. It may have to do with the serum which blocked temporarily your sexual organs. Or it could be the time you spent in the ice that altered your cycling and slowed it down. But i’ll have to run some more tests to be sure.  What I can tell you now is that your cycles are irregular. So I’ll have to check you every day to be able to anticipate your next heat. And I’ll have to monitor your next heat as well. Because right now I don’ t have enough information to tell you more. I know it’s a lot to take in but I must be honest with you. Your life is going to change. »

 

« This is a disaster, Bruce. » 

 

Steve’s spirit went down in an instant. His life was over. One day he was happy, having the best job, the best friends, living the life he’d always wanted to live and the next he had been made prisoners of his own biological attributes. He would have to deal with hormones and cycles and heats and daily examinations and all his friends looking down on him. 

 

« What am I gonna do? How am I gonna do my job? » 

 

« You don’t have to be so dramatic. You will still be able to do your job normally and this won’t affect the team. And the good news is that you will certainly have less heats. Instead of every months. you’ll probably have yours every 2 or 3 months. We will just have to be more careful and far-sighted. We’ll have some more planning to do but you can continue to live your life normally as far as your job is concerned. »

 

« So what’s gonna change? »

 

« The other parts of your life. »

 

« What does that mean? »

 

« I can’t answer all of your existential questions. You’ll have to see for yourself. »

 

Steve didn’t like the judgmental tone with which Bruce had answered that question so he quickly changed the subjects

 

« So how is this going to happen? »

 

« I am going to check your hormones and your pheromones everyday for data and I should be able to foresee your next heat about a week in advance. During your next heat, I’ll have to run tests again. There is also a really good chance that the intensity of your heat was due to years of suppression. Your next heat might be shorter and weaker. And when I gather enough data, I might be able to concoct suppressants that works for you. But until then, you’ll have to endure it. »

 

« I can’t have this life Bruce. I can’t. I am Alpha deep inside. I can’t live in this omega body. I don’t want this. all the check-ups, all the planning. » 

 

« I’m sorry Steve, but you’ll have to. You need to accept it. You need to accept yourself. »

 

« Isn’t there another solution? »

 

« I am afraid not. »

 

« What about those transgender operations? »

 

« You want to undergo a gender-change operation? »

 

«  If I have to. I’ve been thinking about it. I didn’t think I would need to but right now I might consider it. »

 

« Well I don’t think you should do that. Firstly, you have to take a heavy treatment that may not work with the serum. Secondly, this is a big step. It is a long process. Those people often resort to this after a great deal of work on themselves. This is not something you can take too lightly. And I don’t think you know yourself well enough to make such a big change yet. This procedure is irreversible, you know? »

 

« Yeah, I know. I know perfectly well who I am and who I’ve always been. I’ve always known. I am Alpha. I am your leader, I am Captain America. I can’t be omega. Omegas are weak, submissive and dependent. That’s not me. If I can change this about me I’ll take any chance. I have done it before. »

 

« I think your perception of genders is inaccurate. Being Alphas, betas or omegas isn’t about values or qualities. It is about your interaction with others. Being omega is not being weak and dependent. Omegas are powerful. They are giving life. They maintain and strengthen cohesion in a pack and they are soothing. Besides, you know that you can never become Alpha, right? At best, if the operation works you can become Beta. Are you sure this is what you really want? Betas can’t procreate you know that?»

 

« I am not interested in founding a family Bruce. I am not interested in mating either. And which partner would want an incomplete Alpha like me? How could I possibly have a family? »

 

« Well you better use protection then. »

 

« Protection? »

 

« Yeah, I doubt the pill would work for you with the serum. 

 

« What are you talking about? »

 

« The pill, Steve, birth control. You _could_ try it, and maybe it _will_ work, but you shouldn’t take any risk. »

 

« You think I could be impregnated? » Steve suddenly panicked. He hadn’t thought about that at all. 

 

« I seriously doubt it. The serum would probably kill the embryo before it could develop but still, now that you have your heats it might be a possibility. And If I were you I would be precautious. Better safe than sorry. »

 

« I am not gonna mate, and I’m not gonna knot, with anybody, ever. »

 

« If you say, so… Look Steve, I don’t mean to pry but, it seems to me that, for years, you’ve put on hold an important aspect of your life. And I’m telling you this because I think you’re a very good friend and a good person. You’re amazing at your job, you have better experience than anyone else. And you are truly inspiring… »

 

« But… ? »

 

« But,  on the sex department, you’re quite the beginner. Of course, you kind of lived without it because of your body. But now, you have new possibilities. You’ve just discovered news things about yourself. And you’re confused. I really think you should explore these things before making any hasty life-changing decisions. »

 

« So, What am I supposed to do? »

 

« I am not saying that you need to forget about the operation Steve, if this is really what’s best for you… Then, you must do it. And nobody in the team is going to give you shit about it. »

 

« So what? You’re saying that I should fuck every Alpha I meet just to be sure? Is that what you’re saying? Steve said angrily.

 

« I’m not saying that, at all, Cap. Look, there’s an another hypothesis that I haven’t told you about. »

 

« What? »

 

« Well, you know how the cycle is deeply connected to you brain? »

 

« Yeah, I know… I always thought that because I am Alpha inside, somehow it affected my body. »

 

« Well, you’re right. It might be… or.. »

 

« Or…? »

 

« Or, yeah that might be that… Maybe you had a mental block that kind of prevented your cycle to function normally up until now. And something like a change, or a particular event, or someone… has triggered it… »

 

Steve had listened patiently and carefully to his friend. Bruce was a really good friend and even if, Steve felt like there was something that he wasn’t telling, he never felt judged of looked down upon, during their whole discussion. 

 

« You don’t think I’m Alpha, do you? » he finally stated.

 

« I can’t tell you who you are, Steve. Only you can. I’m not a specialist. »

 

« I’m not asking for your doctor’s opinion, Bruce. I’m asking you as a friend. What do you think? »

 

« Honestly? You’re screaming Omega to me. I have met some of these transgender people you were talking about. None of them reacted that way you did when in heat. I’m not judging you, Steve but I think you embraced it. But Like I said. I’m not a specialist. You need to discover those things yourself. »

 

Steve realized as the conversation went, that his whole life, that everything he knew about himself had just collapsed and he felt so empty, so miserable, so insecure and suddenly very lonely. He was seeing all his assurance, all his certitudes, all his convictions being washed away. And tears came to his eyes. 

 

« Thank you for your honesty and for everything. You’re a great friend. » 

 

Bruce held him in his arms and he cried silently, buried in his friend’s shoulder. They stayed like that for a few minutes. And then Bruce had to go and Steve didn’t protest, he wanted to be alone.

 

« Tony said you can stay in the mansion as long as you want if you’re not sure about seeing everyone else just yet. He said something about bringing you some clothes and everything you need, probably in the living-room. We’ll see you at the meeting in three days. Take this time to think about all of this carefully. » Bruce said before leaving. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Steve goes to the meeting.


	7. Steve has the best friends in the world (and he really hates Tony after all)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The meeting with Fury. A very short chapter in which Steve discusses his options with his friends. Not much Tony in this chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to the few people who left comments and kudos. It is always appreciated.

Steve thought about all this carefully during those two days he was alone in the mansion. So Bruce thought he was omega and that something had triggered his heat. But Bruce could be wrong. Now that he had come to his senses, he really wondered how he could have been acting that way because now he was feeling exactly like he had been feeling before. These past three days seemed to him like a nightmare, pretty real but a nightmare nevertheless. He felt Alpha inside. Not Omega. And he didn’t feel like exploring his sexuality, actually, he didn’t think about sex, at all. 

 

Now he was a little excited to meet everyone else again, because he had missed his friends a lot. If he had discovered something about himself, the fact that his friends were very important to him was definitely part of it. He dreaded the reunion though. He sincerely hoped that they would overcome his being omega quite quickly. After all Bruce didn’t seem to care, neither did Tony. But there was also the lying and that would be a lot more difficult to accept, Steve thought. 

Had he been the one who had been lied to, he would have been really angry. 

He also wanted to see Tony. He had promised him a discussion and Steve secretly wished that during that time, they might have bonded a bit, and that they could, maybe, develop some kind of friendship. 

 

His fears quickly disappeared when he saw them. When he arrived in the common living room. Every body was already here, except Tony. Even Thor was here. 

Natasha was the first to come to him and she hugged him tightly (in a totally non sexual way). 

 

« Steve! I was so worried about you. How are you? I am really sorry, you know. »

 

Steve smiled « I’m fine, Nat. Really. And I’m the one who should be sorry. Are you okay? »

 

« I’m really glad you’re okay Steve, and seriously don’t beat yourself up about it. »

 

Clint came behind and wrapped his arms around them. « Group hug! »  They all laughed and he released his grip. Natasha stepped aside to let them greet.

 

« Clint! » Steve exclaimed smiling « I thought you were angry at me. »

 

Clint returned his smile and patted his biceps. « Yeah, man I am. But I’m really glad to see you’re okay. » Then he came closer and smelled him. « Your scent is different. »

 

Steve’s smile faded « What? »

 

Clint probably saw his worries on his face and quickly reassured him.

 

« Don’t worry, Cap, you smell good. In a totally non sexual way. It’s just… it’s just soothing. »

 

« O… Okay » Steve stammered, a little confused. He looked at Natasha who smiled at him and shrugged.

 

Then it was Sam’s turn. Sam didn’t hug him. He walked hesitantly toward him without looking at his face. He was as embarrassed as Steve was, although nobody could see his blush, contrary to Steve. When he was in front of him he finally looked at him and put his hands on Steve’s arms. 

 

« Man! I’m so sorry. I don’t know what came to me. I’m so ashamed of myself. That won’t happen again, I swear. »

 

Steve didn’t know what to say, because he was the one who was sorry. It was _his_ fault. So instead, he pulled his friend toward him for a bro hug and patted his back strongly. At that moment, both men knew that nothing had changed and all fears and shame disappeared. 

 

Then Thor came to him.

 

« Steven, my friend. »

 

And then he caught Steve in a brutal hug and heaved him until his feet didn’t touch the ground anymore and put him back down. Steve smiled.

 

« Thor, what are you doing here? »

 

« I came because this is great great news. I hope to see your progeny quite soon. »

 

Steve should have been offended but he strangely wasn’t, on the contrary, he was touched. He just laughed. 

 

Bruce had been watching the whole scene from afar, smiling. He came to greet him last, he put his hand on Steve’s arm. And just smiled at him. « Good to see you’re fine, Cap. » 

Bruce wasn’t the hugging type, nor was he very expressive but Steve could see the genuine respect and concern in his eyes. 

«  Thanks Bruce. Good to see you too. »

 

Steve was happy. So happy that he hadn’t even noticed the changes in the decoration and the furniture of the large room. It felt good seeing his friends and, _God_ , he had missed them. Not that they hadn’t seen each other for a long time but they had parted in a very awkward way. Steve knew for sure now, that nothing had changed, that he hadn’t lost his friends. Even if there were still some unresolved issues between them, he knew they would figure it out and he would never lose his friends. 

 

Fury had observed the greetings standing at the back of the living room, his arms crossed on chest and was studying Steve with his inquisitive eye. Steve looked at him and greeted him with a nod.

 

« Director. »

 

« Captain. » Fury had answered with a nod too. « It’s time to start. »

 

They all settled down on the couches, Steve sat on an armchair and looked at his feet when he saw all their eyes turned to him. He felt he was at his trial. He was deeply embarrassed now. He couldn’t pretend that nothing had happened. Fury started. 

 

« So, Captain Steven Rogers is Omega. Unexpected. You could have informed us, Captain. That would have avoided a lot of inconveniences. »

 

« Yeah, you really caught us off guard, here, Cap. » Clint added.

 

Of course, they were going to talk about the incident. Of course it was necessary for everybody to explain their feelings. It’s not like the aftermath of a battle against villains. They had fought against each other. And Steve had lied. Well, he hadn’t exactly _lied_ but he hadn’t told the truth, he had hid this and it was fair that now his friends had some trust issues. 

 

This is when Tony finally decided to show up. 

 

« Mr Stark! »  Fury exclaimed, anger in his voice. « As usual, you’re late! »

 

Tony answered with a smirk. « Hi Nick! » 

 

Fury let out an exasperated sigh.

 

« My time’s precious. And really Nick, was it absolutely necessary to hold a meeting to decide who’s gonna fuck Captain’s tight little spangled ass, here? »

 

Steve bent his head even lower than it already was, his ears turning red. _Asshole_!  Tony really was a jerk and Steve hated him. He wondered how he could have ever, even for a second, considered being friends with him.

 

Natasha glared at Tony and growled « Shut up, Stark! » She had always been very protective of Steve.

 

It was painful to hear what everybody had weighing on their heart and Steve had listened and explained without looking once at them. He had been looking at his feet trying to hide his embarrassment and shame. 

When it was finally over, Steve somehow felt lighter and had the deep feeling that he could really trust his friends with anything. Tony was the only one who didn’t say anything. He had rolled his eyes looking annoyed when he had not been focused on his phone.

 

« Well, now that’s settled, let’s start the other point of this meeting. How are we going to do now. Bruce? » Fury asked. 

 

All eyes turned to Bruce and he started to explain everything that he had explained Steve three days ago. Tony left in the middle, saying that this didn’t concerned him, and nobody bothered trying to hold him back. Steve was a little upset that Tony didn’t care but he tried to forget that feeling quickly because Tony was an asshole and he hated him.

 

« So basically, you’re saying that Steve’s heats are unpredictable and that every time he’s gonna be in heat, he will have to be locked up and suffer the effect of the heat on his own for 2 days? This is gonna be torture, Bruce » Natasha asked, worried.

 

« Well, there is a high possibility that his next heat will not be as strong. I sincerely think that in time his cycles will regulate themselves. But as far as dealing with the heat, we don’t have much choice. Steve knows it and this is what he wants. When I have enough data I can try to make him suppressants but until then, he will have to endure it.»

 

« There must be another option. » Thor inquired.

 

« Well the best option so far, would be for him to find a mate. It would actually save us a lot of trouble. It would solve the heat issue and maybe it would help his cycle regulation. It would protect him if anything were to happen, during a mission for instance. It would also solve the smell issue. »

 

« What’s wrong with his smell? » Sam asked.

 

« Well, you probably have noticed that Steve’s smell has changed. The omega scent is growing stronger everyday. » Bruce explained.

 

« Yeah but, when he’s not in heat, it’s not like Alphas are gonna jump him. » Clint said, smirking.

 

« No, and they won’t. But you mustn’t forget that the Captain here, is a super omega enhanced soldier, in the prime of his youth. » Bruce continued.

 

« He is a catch. He will be courted and claimed. » Fury interrupted. « It shouldn’t interfere with his ability to do his job properly but it will certainly be a bother. » 

 

« And how would you know? » Clint asked.

 

« Director Fury here is omega too. » Thor interjected.

 

Every one incredulously turned to Fury. 

 

« I’m too old for you to sense my scent. I am long past having heats. » Fury shrugged, a deadpan expression on his face.

 

« The thing is… The Captain here doesn’t want anything to do with a mate. » Bruce announced.

 

Steve put his hands on his face. The whole conversation had happened without him. He had kept looking at his feet to hide his embarrassment as his friends were talking casually about his love life as if he wasn’t here. He was actually relieved that they didn’t ask his opinion on this. He was far from ready to discuss these things with any of them privately, let alone with everybody. He’d rather dig a hole to hide in the ground, hoping that everybody would forget he had ever been here. He was grateful to Bruce though, he hadn’t mentioned anything about their gender-change conversation, despite his never asking to keep quiet about it. Bruce was a very good friend to confide in. 

However, when he heard that Fury was omega too, it felt good. He was starting to understand what Bruce had said about his perception of genders. He was feeling that maybe he might consider living his life as omega. Maybe it wasn’t so bad after all.

 

Natasha took him out of the hole he was hiding in. « Steve. » she said, but he was still in his thought.

 

« Steve! » She repeated louder. 

 

« What? » Every one turned to him.

 

« Why wouldn’t you want a mate? » She asked.

 

« I don’t know. » He answered and he really didn’t.

 

« How come you don’t know? If you don’t know then you should try to find one. »

 

« Well, that’s settled! NEXT MISSION: Finding a mate for the Captain. » Clint said jokingly.

 

Everyone smiled and after a few banalities, it was the end of their meeting. Steve quickly escaped to his room. That was too much to handle. On his way he was stopped by Natasha who seemed a little bit worried. 

 

« Steve? Where are you going? »

 

« In my room, I need a rest. »

 

« That’s a lot to handle, right? »

 

« Yeah. A bit. I’ll be fine though. Don’t worry. »

 

« Don’t mind him, Steve. He’s a jerk. »

 

« Who? »

 

« Stark. I saw your disappointment when he left. »

 

« I don’t know what you’re talking about. I don’t care about him at all. »

 

« Okay. If you say so. Rest well, then. »

 

She was about to leave but Steve grabbed her by her arm and asked « Is it true? »

 

« What? »

 

« That I smell different. Is it true? Can you smell Omega on me? »

 

« I can. » She smiled and then she must have noticed the concern on his face because she added 

 

« Don’t worry! I’m not gonna grope you in the elevator. »

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this chapter too. Let me know.
> 
> Next chapter: Steve is thinking about having a mate.


	8. Finding a mate and confiding in friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve is still trying to figure things out. No Tony in this chapter (he is mentioned though) it is more about his relationship with his friends and particularly Natasha.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to the readers who left kudos. I hope you enjoy.

After a few days, every thing went back to normal. All the Avengers resumed their routine. Training - meeting with SHIELD - the occasional mission - movie nights in the common living room - … and Tony was still being a jerk. 

 

Obviously there were some changes but Steve had realized that it wasn’t such a bother to be omega. People didn’t really care. 

Of course, there were the staring and the occasional compliment from Alphas. They did make him blush at first but then he got used to it. They were never disrespectful and Steve appreciated them. It felt nice, for the puny ugly kid from Brooklyn he used to be, to be praised. 

Steve also sensed some kind of jealousy from other omegas. He pretended to be a little offended but deep inside he felt flattered. 

Bruce was right. Alphas started to court him but Steve rejected their offers and they were never insisting. If Steve were to find a mate, it would be a grand noble powerful Alpha. If he ever wanted one, because, really, he was not interested.  He’d rather focus on his duties as leader of the Avengers. Saving the world was far more important than dating. 

 

As days passed, Steve had put on hold the dating issue, put it into a drawer, locked it and was hoping that he would never have to open it ever again. And if he had to, the later the better. 

 

Except that his teammates did not intend to let go.

The first one who raised the issue was Bruce, during one of their daily check-ups.

 

« So, have you been thinking about finding a mate? » he had asked innocently.

 

« No, not really. » Steve tried to answer vaguely not to encourage him to pry any further.

 

« Still not interested? » Bruce seemed to want to insist.

 

« I don’t know. I am not sure how to do this. And, it seems that dating would take a lot of time. you know. I’m not ready to do that. »

 

« I understand. But you know mating doesn’t necessarily means dating. »

 

« What do you mean? »

 

« Well, I didn’t suggest it before because you didn’t seem to be the type but there are other options. »

 

Steve gave him a questioning look.

 

« I didn’t think you would be okay with having casual sex, but that would definitely be an alternative. »

 

« Explain! »

 

« Why don’t you talk to Fury about it? Or someone else, you must have some omega friends, no? »

 

« I’m not discussing my sex life with Fury. Certainly not. »

 

« I get it… »

 

« So what’s the alternative? »

 

« You could have a sex friend.»

 

Steve looked at his friend, skeptical.

 

« Some people do that. You find a mate, he or she would take care of your needs while you’re in heat and if you trust each other enough, they could mark you as theirs so no other Alpha would bother you. »

 

« But… What if one of them wants to date later? »

 

« You can break the mating bond, Steve. It’s not permanent. »

 

« So you’re advising me to just have sex with the first stranger just like that… »

 

« I’m not giving you advice. I’m just telling you your options. »

 

« Could it be one of you? »

 

"It could be. Well, obviously not me, not that I couldn’t take care of your needs but I wouldn’t be able to mark you. »

 

« This isn’t how I had imagined it. My life is so complicated. »

 

« Are you still struggling with being omega? »

 

« No, I mean Yes, I’ve been thinking about it. For now, I’m okay but I haven’t had my second heat yet. So I don’t know. I’ve read information about it but it didn’t really help. »

 

« I can provide documentation if you need. And if you really consider it, I could introduce you to some people. »

 

« Really? Thanks. Do you really think I should consider it? »

 

« I don’t, you know my opinion about this but this is your life. I’m nobody to tell you what you have to do. I still think you should try having sex before you attempt anything. As far as I know, you’re still a virgin. You should know all the facts. »

 

Steve had been seriously considering finding a mate after his conversation with Bruce. However, he didn’t think he would trust a stranger enough to do that. So, he contemplated the idea of asking one of his friends to ‘casually’ mate him. 

 

He had first thought about Natasha. They got along really well, she was very pretty and she had always been protective with him. Steve thought it would be easier to mate a female Alpha. She would be more gentle (On second thought, he wasn’t sure Natasha would be very gentle). Then he had watched Female Alpha / Male omega porn and he had decided that maybe not…

 

Then he had considered Sam. Sam and him were close and he thought highly of him. But when he remembered how ashamed his friend had been after the incident, he feared that he wouldn’t handle very well the situation. 

 

Bruce had already told him he couldn’t help him, he regretted it deeply because he trusted Bruce a lot. 

 

Thor was neither Alpha, nor Omega, nor Beta. Thor was a God. Though, maybe he was powerful enough to claim and mark him. No one would steal a mate from a god, would they?

The thing is Thor was not living on earth. That might be problematic. 

 

So that left him with Clint. He thought about Clint eating pizza, Clint saying bad sex jokes, Clint farting on the couch… Okay, so he couldn’t really picture him doing the deed with Clint but that doesn’t mean that it wouldn’t work. Maybe he should discuss the option with someone.

 

It had been more than two months since his last heat and Bruce had raised the mate issue again. Steve was going to have his second heat and he should seriously think about it but he had also given him proper documentation about gender-change. 

 

…

 

Natasha and Him were lying down on his bed, both staring at the ceiling. Natasha often came to his room for a casual chat. This time the discussion turned serious though.

 

« Are you okay? » She suddenly asked, out of nowhere, breaking the silence.

 

« Yeah, sure. »

 

«  No, I mean, are you okay? Since that meeting, we never got the chance to talk about you. »

 

« Why are you asking that, now? »

 

« I don’t know… You seem… preoccupied. »

 

« I’m fine. »

 

« You’re sure? You know that you can tell me anything, right? »

 

Suddenly Steve felt the need to talk about his worries. He had always confided in her. It seemed right to ask her about it.

 

« I’m considering becoming a Beta. »

 

« WHAT??? »

 

« I don’t feel Omega inside, Nat. I don’t want to be Omega. I’m not comfortable with all this heat-mating-having sex with Alphas thing. »

 

« Ooh, Steve. » He could see she felt sorry for him. « Are you sure? »

 

« I’m trying to figure it out. Bruce has given me documentation. »

 

« You’ve discussed it with Bruce? What does he think? »

 

« He doesn’t agree. He thinks that I’m lying to myself. Moreover, he said that the treatment would probably didn’t work because of the serum. But if it could work, it’d be great. I must try everything right? »

 

« I think Bruce’s right though. I think you truly are omega. »

 

« Why? »

 

« Well, every omega acts different when in heat, but you, you were really into it. You don’t know a lot of omegas. Maybe you should find Omega friends and share your experiences . It would help you deal with all this. »

 

« Why does everyone tells me that? »

 

« Did Bruce tell you that too? »

 

« Bruce says I need to get laid. »

 

she laughed. « I never thought I would here those words coming from you mouth. He’s right though. … So? Have you tried? »

 

« I have been thinking a lot about it. I don’t have time for dating. I’m not comfortable with having sex with strangers. I even contemplated asking one of you… »

 

She laughed. « Really? … So how did it go so far? Have decided yet? » She was obviously teasing.

 

« I thought… Maybe Clint? »

 

« Clint? No way. I never thought you would go for someone like Clint. Is he your type? »

 

« Hum… No… I don’t know. I’m not sure I have a type. »

 

« Oh, come on! Every body has a type. You must have thought about it, right?

 

« Hum … no. »

 

« You liar! You know what you’d like to do in bed. I know your a virgin but still. »

 

« I know what I feel like when in heat but other than that. I haven’t really thought about it. »

 

« Well, think about it now. »

 

Steve had thought about it but he had rejected the idea every time. The thing is every time he pictured himself having sex, he would reminisce his memories from his heat. And he did not want to remember the most embarrassing moment of his life. Also, he wasn’t ready to accept what it really meant about him. He really wished Natasha would let go but she didn’t seem to.

 

« So… Male or Female? »

 

« I don’t know Nat, … Male… Maybe? »

 

« That’s a start. Go on. »

 

« Dark haired maybe…  Handsome… Elegant… Someone powerful, with commanding eyes… »

 

« Sounds like someone I know… Steve I’m sorry to tell you this but, you really sound Omega to me. »

 

Steve blushed. He had said too much.

 

« Why don’t you ask Tony? »

 

« Tony? » Steve had not even thought about him. He hated him so much. « No way! Not Tony! Tony’s so not my type. »

 

« Really? Because, to me, Tony sounds _exactly_ like your type. »

 

« Tony’s an asshole. Tony’s the last person I would ever ask to do this. »

 

« Tony would be the best for you. He is the most powerful Alpha I know. He would be perfect for you. If he were to mark you as his mate, no one would dare get close to you. » 

 

« Well, I could have any Alpha to mark me. They don’t have to be powerful. »

 

« Actually, they do. »

 

« I don’t understand. »

 

« You haven’t realized, have you? »

 

« Realized what? »

 

Natasha sat up to meet his gaze.

 

« You’re not just any omega, Steve. You have the finest and the strongest smell I know. You have a perfect body. You have status. Some Alphas could claim you and break the bond you’ve made with your mate if they were not powerful enough… »

 

« So you think… Tony… but, he doesn’t even like me. »

 

« What makes you think that? »

 

« Well, obviously. And he rejected me when I was in heat. »

 

« He’d better! I wouldn’t have forgiven him if he’d laid his hands on you and taken advantage when you were so vulnerable. That doesn’t mean he wouldn’t have his way with you if you’d let him.»

 

« But… »

 

« Tony would be a perfect choice for you and he’s experienced with this. He is not the dating type so he probably wouldn’t mind. And you can trust him. »

 

« You think? »

 

« Yeah, totally. Go for it Cap. And please forget about Clint. »

 

« Why? »

 

Natasha blushed a little. 

 

« I need to tell you something… About… me and Clint. »

 

Steve looked at her a little bit lost and then he understood.

"Oh… But how? … you’re both Alphas? »

 

« Yeah, I know but… I like him. He likes me. … We’re not dating or anything  but… That’s not… That’s not so unusual nowadays… »

 

At that moment, Clint barged into the room. « What’s up ladies? » And he saw Natasha’s blush on her face. « Did I interrupt something? »

 

Steve replied « No, no, just talking about mating… »

 

« I see. The Captain wants to pop his cherry… » Clint smirked.

 

« No… no.. » Steve stammered as his face blushed.

 

Clint grinned. « So, who’s up for a game? » 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me if you liked and if you didn't like.
> 
> Next chapter: there will be more interaction with Tony.


	9. Clint makes bad jokes and Tony really is an asshole.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a very short chapter in which Clint pranks Steve and it doesn't end the way he had expected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and thanks to the people who left comments. It is very appreciated.

Three days later, they were all having breakfast together in the kitchen. They did that often, though Tony rarely showed up. 

Clint was stealing food from Natasha’s plate and she was smacking his head in return. Steve watched them interact together and found them cute. They seemed really close and really happy and he wondered how he’d never noticed it before. 

Bruce was a lot more discreet. He was the most secretive on the team but Steve appreciated that a lot. He was reading the newspaper by the window, drinking his tea. He always preferred a papered version that reading on the tablet, much to Tony’s discontent. Steve, on the other hand, understood it completely, he’d never been really at ease with everything technologic. He felt close to his friend and that made his differences with Tony even more obvious.

And then he tried to think of something else because he realized that Tony was the only thing he had in mind since his conversation with Natasha. Could he really ask Tony to be his mate? 

 

It had considered Natasha’s word carefully and she was right on many things. It’s true that Tony had the kind of aura that Steve thought he wanted from his partner. And he had this powerful Alpha look that made his knees go weak sometimes. And he was handsome too. And Steve had really wanted him that time. And really, he didn’t have to fear things to be awkward between them, because things had always been awkward between them. 

 

Steve was turning his spoon in his almost cold coffee, lost in his thoughts.

 

« Jeez, and here I thought the Captain was all prude and romantic. »

 

Tony had decided to show up for breakfast.

 

« What? » Steve asked, shaking off his reveries. 

 

« I didn’t know that under that perfect model boy scout face, there was so much debauchery. »

 

Steve was confused at first and then angry. He was used to Tony’s teasing and flirting but that was just being mean. Moreover, Steve didn’t want Tony to show him his bad side while he was trying to consider him as a potential mate. He stood up angrily.

 

« I didn’t do anything to deserve being insulted first thing in the morning. » 

 

Tony laughed

 

« Chill out, Capsicle. So you finally decided to get your spangled ass taken care of. Nice. » Tony smiled bitterly and then groped Steve’s ass cheek « How lewd, Captain. »

 

Steve was enraged he seized Tony’s hand « You’re an asshole! I don’t know what’s stopping me from… » And then Tony looked Steve in the eyes and Steve was mesmerized by his Alpha look and let go of his hand. 

 

« So I guess Stark has been wandering around dating sites again. » Clint giggled. 

 

They all looked at him with surprise. Natasha was fuming. « Oh no, you _didn’t_! »

 

Clint was grinning with pride. Bruce hid his smile behind his cup of tea and Tony laughed, then he looked at Steve’s face with a mocking smile. He took his phone out and started reading out loud.

 

« 25 years old male omega. 6.07 ft. Well-fit body. Looking for well-hung virile male Alpha to take care of his heats…. how perverted Cap! And the picture is nice too. »

 

All of them burst into laughter and Steve reddened, oscillating between anger and embarrassment. 

 

« Clint? You didn’t… How could you? And you added a _picture_? »

 

« Relax Cap! It’s a joke. But seriously, you should take a look at the site. You’ve been receiving a lot of demands already. »

 

Steve sat down and started to panic. « I cant’ believe you did that to me. How could you degrade me and my public image like that. »

 

« Nobody knows it’s you. look » Tony showed him the picture. It had probably been taken after their daily working out session. You could see Steve’s shirtless torso and the beginning of his hips, wearing his usual sweatpants.

 

« How did you know it was me then? »

 

« Please, darling. I’d recognize your sweet body anywhere. »

 

Steve was surprised by Tony’s answer (and secretly flattered as well) so he lost his anger and didn’t answer.

 

Natasha scolded her lover. And Bruce finally decide to take part in the discussion.

 

« That’s not a bad idea, actually. »

 

They all turned to him.  Steve whined, incredulous. « Bruce… You can’t be serious. »

 

« Of course that one was a bad idea. I’m not saying you should throw yourself at the first stranger. But you could try going on a dating site, not this one obviously, and maybe go on a date. See what happens. I’m sure you’ve never done that before. Maybe it’ll help you figure things out. »

 

« You know I don’t want to date. I just want… » 

 

Steve stopped in the middle of his sentences, remembering that not everybody in the room was aware of his intentions. Some whom he’d rather not tell, by the way.

 

Tony looked at him and smirked. « Wow, so you were actually planning to do this. » He said, looking appalled.

 

« Huh… No… This is… This is not what you think. »

 

Tony crossed his arms. « I’m not thinking anything. Captain. You can do what you want. I’m just surprised that’s all. I thought you’d be the romantic type. You’re giving everyone lessons about virtue when you’re the most perverted of us. »

 

« I’m not lecturing anyone… » Steve tried to protest.

 

« Get off his back, Stark. » Natasha interrupted.

 

« Yeah right. It’s about time. Being a virgin when you’re 90 is pretty pathetic. And you should really get that frustrated slippery ass filled soon, it was so eager that it almost swallowed me up last time. »

 

That was a low blow. Steve was so hurt that he couldn't say anything and didn’t respond. Tony had done it. He had used what had happened during his heat to hurt him and humiliated him. 

 

« That was unnecessarily mean. » Clint said and Natasha slapped his head. « Ouch! What’s that for? » 

 

She didn’t answered Clint but instead defended Steve.

 

"You’re the worst prick on earth, Stark. How could you say something like that? »  And she didn’t let him respond as she took Steve by the arms and escorted him to the elevator.

 

Before the door closed on them, Steve heard Bruce telling Tony off. « I don’t know what you’re playing at Tony but that really was a bad move. I hope you realize… »

 

The elevator started to move. Steve’s heart was beating fast and he was breathing heavily. 

 

« The fucking _bastard_  » he shouted through gritted teeth (and yeah, he had sworn, really). « I can’t _believe_ I ever considered asking him to help me. That was so _low_. Even though… Even though he always teases me, I never thought…  he would actually use this against me. » 

Steve was furious and trying to contain tears of rage. Natasha headed her hand to his cheek, rubbing it soothingly. 

 

« I know. » She said. « I never should have told you to go to him. I’m sorry. »

 

« What have I done, Nat? What have I done for him to hate me that much? »

 

« Nothing, honey. He’s just a prick. »

 

Steve decided to kill a few punch bags to blow off some steam. After two hours of enraged punching he had made two decisions. He would go on a date, like Bruce had said, and he would never ever speak to a certain someone ever again. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if the dialogues are a bit off. Since English is not my language, I always feel like the dialogues are not natural and the characters are dorks or retards. It is particularly true for this chapter but I couldn't do any better. If one of you were to point out the mistakes or the parts that don't appear believable, I would change and correct them.
> 
> Next Chapter : there will be some action and Steve and Tony find an arrangement. 
> 
> I'll try to post very soon.


	10. It’s not an Avenger’s story without some action (Also, Tony is still an asshole)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There is an lizard attack and Steve makes stupid choices. Tony and Steve ease the tension between them but there's still way to go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the comments and kudos. :-)

So the next day when the alarm went on because of giant lizards in the subway, Steve decided not to call for Tony. If he couldn’t respect his Captain then he had nothing to do on the team. 

 

In the Quinjet, Steve was still ruminating and none of the others questioned his choice. When they arrived on the site, people were screaming and running about everywhere. They could distinguish some kind of monster moving inside the subway which had stopped. The monster had a body in its mouth and was shaking it from right to left, spilling blood on the windows. 

 

« Sam, Clint get the civilians to safety, hulk smash the lizard, Natasha come with me. »

 

They all obeyed the orders. Steve, Natasha and hulk came into the wagon. There were at least ten decapitated bodies on a floor and blood everywhere. Hulk attacked the lizard. 

 

« There are at least two more at the back. » said Natasha before running to them.

 

Natasha shoot the first one, but bullets didn’t penetrated its skin. She attacked him while Steve headed to the third one. He threw his shield on its head. The monster stumbled back but came back roaring, its giant mouth open to show all of its jaw. Steve tore off one of the seats and stuffed it into the giant mouth. The monster shrieked. Steve jump on it and rode its back. The monster couldn’t catch him with its small legs. Steve kept hitting the head of the monster, putting out its eyes first and then going to its brain. The monster was twisting  and jumping like a crazy horse but Steve squeezed his legs tight not to lose his grip and managed to knock the monster out. He gave a quick glance in Natasha’s direction and saw her doing the same, as Hulk was helping her. He took a knife to finish off the creature.

 

« Captain, come out quickly, they keep showing up.  We’re not done here. »

 

Steve noticed there was a giant hole on the floor.  They must have come from the underground. He got out of the wagon quickly and saw four lizards on the platform. 

 

« Have you evacuated the everyone? » has asked Sam and Clint.

 

« Almost done, Cap. » Clint’s voice answered.

 

« You, Sam Natasha. Take care of our four little friends here.  Hulk come with me, they’re coming from this tunnel. Let’s go »

 

Steve entered the tunnel. There were at least 10 of them. Hulk ran into the mass and started to smash. 

 

« When you’re done on the platform, come down to help us. There are at least 10 them. »

 

Steve was rushing to attack one when another grabbed him by his leg, its fangs penetrated into his skin and he let out a scream of pain. He hit its head with his shield until it released his leg. Then, Steve took his knife out and stabbed through its skull to kill the brain,  at the same time he was  beating the first one with his shield. Suddenly, a third one gnawed his shield away. 

His knife was still stuck on the dying lizard’s head behind him, the one which had taken his shield closed its mouth on his arms and the third one went to his throat. It was about to tear him off. He was done for. 

Steve closed his eyes, he saw his whole life scrolling down before him. He was about to die, because of his stupid choices. Steve thought about everything that he was going to miss out, until he was interrupted by the familiar sound of a blast. 

 

« Such an amazing party, so why wasn’t I invited? »

 

Steve sighed with relief and opened his eyes but ignored the voice. He didn’t have the time to think about anything other than saving his life. He punched the lizard’s head to make it let go of his arm while the blast was finishing the first monster. As soon as he was free, he ran to his shield, despite the deep wound in his leg. The adrenaline allowed him to keep fighting without feeling too much pain. Or, maybe he was ignoring it. He looked around for other monsters. There weren’t many left, the rest of the team was coming to rescue. 

 

« You’re welcome, Cap. » The robotized voice said, but Steve ignored it again. He helped Hulk take down the lasts of the monsters.

 

When all the monsters were dead. Steve didn’t lose any time to suggest an expedition in order to inquire on the origin of these monsters. He didn’t realized he was limping. When Natasha told him he was bleeding, he looked at the lacerations on his limbs. Suddenly, he felt really weak. He felt an intense pain in his leg and in his arm. The wounds were burning. He screamed in pain. 

Steve couldn’t lead the expedition. Natasha was second in command, she took it from there. She gave orders. As Bruce had just come back and he could take a look at Steve, the diagnostic was quick.

 

« Poison!  Their fangs are poisonous. » 

 

Steve sight went blurry and his mind foggy. He was slowly losing consciousness. He barely heard Natasha’s voice asking Tony to get him to safety. He protested with a muffled voice « No… Not him » before he passed out.

 

…

 

When he woke up, Steve was on a hospital bed. His whole body was in pain and he could hardly move. His leg and arm were burning. He recognized the ceiling of the medical ward of the Tower. 

 

« Hello princess! Did you sleep well? » 

 

Steve didn’t have to turn his head to recognize the person who was sitting next to him. 

 

« What’re you doing here? » he asked with a furred tongue.

 

« That’s harsh! Well, obviously, I’m taking care of you. You’re safe by the way. Bruce has run some test. The serum is fighting the poison and your wounds are healing. Your life’s not in danger. You should be fine by tonight. »

 

« Where are the others? »

 

« Bruce is in the lab, he’ll come back in a few minutes. The others are still on the mission. » 

 

Steve didn’t answer. Tony was the last person he wanted to see right now. He needed to rest and his presence made him feel agitated.

 

"Please go." he pleaded.

 

« Don’t be so over dramatic Captain. Is this about yesterday? »

 

Steve didn’t answer. He was too tired, too weak to fight. There was an awkward silence and then he found the strength to repeat his plea.

 

« Get out, Tony. Leave me alone. »

 

Steve was in so much pain that he had to keep himself from screaming. He could feel his brain pumping in his skull. He was holding back tears not to show himself weak to Tony again.

 

« Last time I came to rescue you, you were begging me to stay and now you’re begging me to go. You such an indecisive guy, Captain. »

 

« Shut up! » Steve’s words came out as a sigh. He was in so much pain that his vision became blurry. His body was burning up and he was shaking and sweating. Tears came down his temples.

 

« Shhh Captain » Tony gently ordered while he pressed a wet cloth on his forehead. « Relax. Everything’s gonna be fine. » his voice was soothing and Steve passed out with a sense of deja vu.

 

When he woke up again, Tony was gone. Bruce was at his side. He explained. He could have died if it wasn’t for the Serum. Steve was almost healed. The poison was out of his body, only his wounds hurt a bit. Bruce changed his bandages and he could go.

In the elevator, Steve hesitated between the common living area (he wanted to make sure his teammates were safe and to know how the mission went) and his room (He couldn’t face Tony, not right now.)

Steve fought his emotions and opted for the first choice. When he arrived in the living room all his team welcomed him back. Tony was here but he stayed in the corner and didn’t say anything.

They had just came back from report. They were all safe and sound. Nobody else was bit. They told him everything about their mission but didn’t mention anything about his decision to keep Tony away. They knew it wasn’t the right time to discuss it. And Steve was grateful for that.

Steve decided to have his dinner in his room. Alone. He had fucked up again and didn’t feel like talking about it, nor pretending that it hadn’t happened. 

He was resting on his bed, watching a movie when Tony slipped into his room and paced silently to his bed. He stood there until Steve raised his head from his screen. He was startled but not surprised. Tony had no boundaries and didn’t know anything about privacy. He had no problem overriding the entry code and breaking into his room. Steve should have been angry but he didn’t have the energy to. Instead, he let out a defeated sigh and looked at him silently.

 

« We didn’t have that talk in the end. » Tony started.

 

« What do you want? »

 

« I don’t know what’s up with you lately, Captain. »

 

Steve breathed out a desperate sigh, annoyed.

 

« I do respect you, I really do. I have always respected you as a Captain but you fucked up good this time. And I’m sorry but someone had to tell you. » 

 

Steve kept staring silently as Tony continued. 

 

« I know you hate me but you can’t let your personal feelings meddle with your work. It’s the second time that you let them interfere with your decisions concerning the team and each time it ended up terribly. »

 

« You want me out? »

 

« What are you talking about? Of course not, why would I want you out? You’re great at what you do. You were meant to do this. But you need to pull yourself together. »

 

Steve looked down to avoid Tony’s reproachful gaze. 

 

« I trusted you. » He whispered. « I never thought… I never thought you could… that you 

would… » 

 

Tony looked pained so Steve was a bit confused. He decided to start the talk, for the good of the team. It was painful to talk about this but Steve tried to keep his voice calm and composed.

 

« We never got along, you and I. You’ve always been mocking me and I never liked you, you never stop bothering me and all… but even if we’re not friends, I do respect you as a teammate. I learned to trust you and I know, I knew you’d have my back, no matter what. And I… I… never thought you’d use what happened to humiliate me… like that. » 

 

« So, this is how you feel about me, huh? Fair enough… Well, now you know that I really _am_ that kind of assholes. I don’t just pretend. »

 

« I just… You’re right, I overreacted, I let my feelings meddle with my decisions and… That was totally unprofessional. I want to work with you, Tony. … This… It is working. »

 

« I get it, you’re on edge right now, with all the changes and all. Let’s keep this professional, Okay? I’ll make a deal with you. You stop nagging me about everything you’re always nagging me about, and I’ll get off your face. I won’t tease you, or talk to you or anything else, unless it has to do with work. We need to make this work Captain, for the sake of the team. »

 

« Okay, but you don’t have to keep away from your own house, for my sake. »

 

« I’m not. I just have a lot of work to do these days… So deal? »

 

« Deal! »

 

« Great, I’m gonna go now… » Tony turned around but didn’t move forward. He continued « About yesterday… I’m sorry. I didn’t mean any of it. It’s great that you want to have a mate. It’s a good thing really. » and he walked toward the door.

 

Steve called out to him before he left the room, he turned his face to him.

 

« Tony… Thank you… »  he paused. « for saving my life. »

 

Tony nodded but didn’t say anything. He had a suffering glimpse in his eyes. It was the first time he saw the man hurting and vulnerable. He felt a wave of sympathy and affection for the man. Tony left the room, leaving Steve troubled.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Steve is going to have his first kiss


	11. Steve goes on a date!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve goes on a date and has his first kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and leaving comments and kudos.  
> I'm sorry if some of you think the plot is too slow. I like having interaction between the team. It's not just about Steve and Tony.  
> I hope you still enjoy reading anyway.

It had been two months and a half that Steve had had his first heat. Tony had kept his promise. They had barely seen each other as Tony was often out or working in his workshop. On the rare times they had met, other than during a mission, it had been peaceful. They had smiled politely at each other and exchanged casual talk. There was no friendly warmth between them but there was no animosity either. The tensions inside the team had considerably eased out.

At work too, Tony was more ‘obedient’ and he followed the orders and never questioned Steve’s decisions. Steve was really grateful. 

 

He thought about him a lot, though. He couldn’t forget the hurtful expression he had on his face that night. He kept wondering why and he started wondering what was Tony hiding behind that ego. He thought that maybe, he had been a bit harsh in his judgement. After all, Tony had really good friends that deeply cared about him. He couldn’t be that much of an asshole, otherwise they would have left him alone long time ago. He had thought of asking Pepper about Tony. And then he had pushed this idea out of his head and felt stupid. She would think he was interested in him, which was absolutely not the case.

Pepper was the only partner that lasted more than a week. Tony truly deeply cared about her. She was Beta though, Steve figured that might be the reason things didn’t work out between them.

 

Steve had followed everyone’s advise. He had been on a dating site. Not a hook-up site this time, a proper romantic looking-for-life-partner site. He had been discussing with some Alpha and was about to have his first date. He was a little excited. It would be good he thought, meeting someone else for a change. And maybe, if everything was happening really well, then, maybe, Steve could have his first kiss. He realized that he had never kissed before. Well, of course there had been the occasional peck with cute Omega dancers on his Star-spangled man tour, but that wasn’t a real kiss. He surprised himself smiling at the idea.

Natasha had taken him shopping and Tony had even offered to pay for it. He hadn’t accepted. 

He was supposed to meet his date in a fancy restaurant in town. The man was exactly Steve’s type. Powerful. Tall. Dark haired. Very elegant. He was waiting for him with a rose in his hand. He had offered champagne. He had held his chair for him. He had been very thoughtful and attentive. Very gentlemanly. And that had made Steve feel really uncomfortable. They had a nice chat, he was interesting but it wasn’t like the noisy teasing and passionate discussions that he could have with his teammates. He was very handsome, very attractive and Steve could picture himself in bed with him. It would be nice he thought, but there was something off. Somehow, he didn’t want to give his first kiss to this man. He thought about how he missed when Tony used to tease him all the time. He kinda liked the attention. He would not see the man again. Now, he was a little less excited about the whole finding-a-mate thing. 

...

 Natasha interrogated him as soon as he stepped inside the living room. 

« So? How was it? »

« Nice… »

« Just nice? » 

« Yeah, nice. »

« Are you gonna see him again? »

« No. »

« Why not? You said he was nice.  And… Well, he _was_ really hot… »

« Yeah, but. »

« But what? What’s the problem? »

« I don’t know… There was no… I don’t know.. sparkle? »

« No sparkle! Really! Do I need to remind you that you’re not looking for the father of your babies there. You don’t wanna date, remember? You need to find someone to take care of your heats. »

« When you’re saying it like that… seems a bit cold. I’m not sure I’m comfortable with the whole thing. »

« You’re a chicken, Captain. »

Steve didn’t let this experience discourage him though. He went on a second date, and a third, and a fourth… Not one of them satisfying. And Steve grew a bit desperate.

 ...

 

It had been two months and three weeks since Steve’s last heat. And Bruce had told him that his next heat should start in a week. Steve panicked. He skipped movie night to go on a fifth date. 

This one was a total disaster, the guy was drunk off his face. He had spend the whole evening crying about his ex, spitting food on Steve’s shirt and had even thrown up in the cab. 

When he came back home, his friends were sleeping on the couch, except for Tony, who was in the kitchen, making coffee. Steve didn’t know how he could greet him so he didn’t say anything.

 

« You smell like puke! » Tony said, without looking away from his coffee

Steve was startled he stuttered out a « yeah, sorry. »

« I assume your date didn’t go as well as you expected. »  

Was Tony really asking about his date? And, moreover, Tony was actually having a conversation with him that was not work or the weather.

« Hum… no… not really. » 

Tony turned to him with a mocking smile.

Steve smiled in return and sighed « It was a disaster. »

« I’m sorry for you. Must suck to be you. »

Steve felt happy that Tony had dared a little teasing, it felt like their relationship was back to normal for a second.

« I really do suck at this, huh? What should I do? Help me! You have sex all the time. How do you do? » 

« I doubt this is what you want, Cap. »

« Why not? Maybe. » 

« Well, I go to clubs or bars… People are pretty open in some of these places… »

Steve tried to picture it and thought about it but, no, that was not for him.

« Yeah, maybe you’re right… »

« Coffee? » 

« Sure! Thanks… »

 

And they had talked, about everything and anything and Steve felt he finally had the relationship he had always wanted with Tony. A true friendship. Tony was funny, he was passionate, energetic, and Steve could listen to him rambling for hours. Steve remembered how safe he felt when Tony was around. He remember how good and reassuring and soothing Tony had been when he had come to his rescue. He remembered how he could trust Tony with his life.

The next morning, Steve went running alone. He wanted to reminisce last night. He felt refreshed.

... 

Time was running out. 

His heat would be in 3 days, and already he could feel his Alpha teammates starting to react to him. They were controlling themselves though, it was easier, now that they knew. Bruce had explained what they had planned for him for his heat and he had panicked. He didn’t want to live through all this alone again. It had been too painful. He knew he had said that he’d endure it but, the more time passed and the more freaked out he was. He could endure pain, torture, even dying in the bottom of the ocean but the idea of being alone again during his heat frightened him to death.

That evening, he decided that, it was time for him. Never mind all he had said before. He wanted to have sex. Now. Find a partner while he was still himself and have him take care of his heat. The lucky one wouldn’t refuse, would he? 

Steve decided to go to a bar. 

When he came in, the air went out. Everyone in the room turned their eyes to him but nobody moved. Alphas as well as Omegas, they were all too impressed. Steve remembered what Natasha had said about his smell. So that was what she had been talking about. Steve went to the bar and ordered a drink. Tried to make conversation, without much success. The Alphas around didn’t dare approach him.

And Then, he saw _him_. Dark long hair, blue eyes, a mysterious expression on his face. He reminded him of Bucky in a darker, more powerful Alpha way. Their eyes met and the man came to him.

« Hi! I’m James. » He was smiling. 

Steve was puzzled for a second, _they had the same name_ , but quickly returned the smile.

« Steve! … mmh… Hi! »

« Nice to meet you, Steeeve. » He had languorously paused on his name and came a lot closer, invading Steve’s personal space. He was tall though a little smaller than him. He kept his eyes plunged into Steve’s and he felt himself waver but, at the same time, he had gained a new self-confidence. He felt sexy and attractive and wanted. 

« What do you wanna drink? » Steve asked. 

« I have a drink already. » James said and showed it to him. 

Then he put it on the bar and took Steve face between his hands, his eyes still plunging into Steve’s, breathing heavily and sexily on his face, pushing him slightly backward.

Steve leaned his forearms on the bar behind him and stared at the man. His heart skipped and he felt warm inside. He wanted him but the feeling was completely different from when his was in heat. He wanted him, he wanted to touch him, he wanted him inside him but he was still in control. 

« I’m not thirsty, though. » James slurred.

« Yeah, me neither. » Steve smiled lasciviously.

« You wanna go? » James came even closer to him. Their lips almost touching. Steve could feel his body against him. He felt a huge lump inside his pants. That made him hard."

"Yeah."

 

James and Steve ran out of the bar, laughing and holding hands. James pulled Steve into a dark alley and pushed him against the wall. They were still staring at each other. James was holding Steve’s face in his hand, like it was the most precious thing of the world. Steve was still laughing, his hands caressing the other man’s chest, feeling really hot.

Then it happened, James closed his eyes and put his lips on Steve’s and kissed him. He pushed forward holding Steve’s head firmly. Then he stopped for a second to look at Steve. He wasn’t laughing anymore, he was looking at James with curiosity, fear and envy. Then James kissed him again and Steve’s returned the kiss. He rubbed his hand up James’s chest and took his face. James wrapped his arms around him and hold him tight. He kissed him slowly and languorously. He slipped his tongue in Steve’s mouth and caressed his tongue gently, his hands going down on his ass. Steve felt a wave of heat inside. They kissed gently and passionately for a few minute and then James pushed Steve against the wall with force. He started rubbing his crotch against Steve’s, jerking his hips between his legs. Steve felt hot and wanted James to fuck him right here, right now.

 

And then he panicked. This was _not_ what he wanted. He did not want to fuck a stranger in the street, no matter how nice, and hot and attractive James was. This was not what he wanted for his first time, this was not what he wanted ever.

Steve pushed James violently and he stumbled back three steps away. 

 

« Sorry… hum… err… I panicked. »

James laughed. Steve saw in his eyes that he had understood.

« It’s okay. »

« I don’t think, I wanna do this. » 

« I figured… » James was smiling affectionately. 

« Sorry. »

« It’s fine. Don’t worry. »

« Thanks » 

«  For what? »

« Being…understanding? »

 James smiled with regrets in his eyes. Then he held him his card. 

 « If you change your mind. »

 Steve took the card and looked at it. James started walking backward, still smiling. 

 « He’s a lucky guy. »

 Steve looked at him questioningly.

 « Who? »

 But James had turned away and was already leaving.

 « See you around, Steve. Take care. »

  

That night Steve went to bed content. He had had his first kiss, and it had felt amazing. He had been brave enough to go to a bar and seduce a male Alpha. And he hadn’t lost control, he hadn’t had sex with a stranger in the street even if he had wanted to, he was not a slut. He felt proud.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Of course James is physically based on the winter soldier (movies). 
> 
> I didn't actually planned the first kiss to be like this at first but then I read a fiction about Steve & Bucky and this happened. It does not differ much from the original plot I had in mind. I just thought he would come later on...
> 
> NEXT TIME : Steve has a dream. The next chapter is going to be a little bit sexy, not to much.


	12. Steve has a dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A small chapter in which Steve is thinking about James.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is a little smut at the end. Not much, just a little foretaste of what's gonna happen later.

When Steve went down for breakfast the next day, he was in a haze with a stupid grin on his face. He had had his first kiss and it had felt amazing. While he was preparing his food, he hovered his lips with his fingers in bliss, remembering the touch of James’s. He was smiling, focused on the memory of the softness of the passionate kiss, so focused that he forgot there were only two days left before his next heat.

 

« You seem in a good mood Cap, this morning. » pointed Bruce.

 

Steve didn’t answer, still deep in his thought but he was shaken off his reveries by Natasha prying.

 

« Oh my god! You did it! »

 

« … N… no » Steve tried to deny despite his face turning red.

 

« Your face has betrayed you, Cap. You totally did it. » Clint said mockingly.

 

« I didn’t »

 

« Have you met someone? » Bruce asked kindly.

 

« No! … Maybe. »

 

« I knew it! I knew it! I knew it! … Spill! » Natasha ordered.

 

« I… no… It’s not like that… It’s no-one. »

 

« You didn’t have a date last night, did you? How did you meet him? Was it love at first sight? Did he come onto you? Did you come onto him? Oh my, Steve, how bold. » Natasha spoke excitedly.

 

« Yeah… No… this is… there was this… bar. »

 

« You went to a _bar_? » Clint cried out, expressively shocked. « Who are you? What have you done to my Captain? »

 

« Excuse me, but I was going to bars way before you were born. »

 

« Point taken. »

 

« So what did you do? » asked Natasha, her eyes sparkling with curiosity.

 

« Nothing. » He wanted to say ‘talking’ but that would be a lie. There hadn’t been much talking. His face was red again.

 

« You liar! » 

 

He definitely couldn’t lie.

 

« We may… have kissed… a little. » Steve bent his face down to hide his huge grin on his face.

 

« Oh Steve! Was it the first time? » Natasha’s voice was soft. She was so perceptive. 

 

Steve plunged his head in his hands in embarrassment. Clint laughed mockingly, and Bruce asked with an interested look on his face:

 

« Are you gonna see him again? » 

 

Steve knew what Bruce was implying, he suddenly remembered that his heat would be in two days and that he still didn’t have a mate. The grin on his face disappeared and he answered in a flat tone.

 

« No. I mean… I don’t think so. Maybe. »

 

« You didn’t like him? » Natasha inquired worryingly.

 

« Yes, I mean, he was handsome and quite powerful and… »

 

« What’s wrong with him? » 

 

« Nothing, he was great. Kind. Respectful… »

 

« But? »

 

« I don’t know. I don’t know him. He’s a stranger. I can’t… I cant’ possibly trust him with… »

 

Natasha let out an exasperated sigh. 

 

« You’re a hopeless case, Steve. »

 

« Did you at least get his number? » Clint asked. 

 

« He gave me his card. »

 

« Please don’t tell me you threw it away. » Clint sighed.

 

Steve was a bit ashamed as he had considered throwing it away for a long time before finally hiding it in the drawer of his bedside table.

 

« Throw what away? »

 

Steve felt his heart skip when he heard Tony’s voice behind him. _Tony_. His exaltation suddenly turned into bitter regrets. He didn’t want Tony to know. He absolutely did _not_ want Tony to know. 

 

Tony put his hands on Steve’s shoulders and bent over Steve’s face.

 

« So? … What is it that you’ve thrown away, Captain? You know I can get anything back. » Tony was smiling kindly above him, massaging his shoulders gently. Steve’s skin shuddered at the touch. He enjoyed the contact a little bit before answering, maybe a little bit too long though.

 

« Steve had his first kiss, yesterday. » Clint said with a happy grin before Natasha hit his ribs with her elbow, getting an « ouch, what did I do again? » from him.

 

Steve felt Tony’s hands stiffen for a second and he let go of his shoulders wailing around to face him. He was still smiling but Steve was sure he had caught a glimpse of pain crossing his eyes.

 

« Finally! » he said, sounding genuinely pleased. « So, who’s the lucky guy? » 

Steve felt uncomfortable now, he didn’t want to discuss this with Tony. He didn’t know why but, he didn’t want him to know. He hesitated for a moment before answering, trying to find a way out of this but finally answered, pressured by the four pairs of curious eyes staring at him.

 

« James. »

 

Tony’s face grimaced a bit as if he was holding a taunt and relaxed again. 

 

« I’m really happy for you, Captain. » He finally said, still smiling. 

 

Steve felt bitter. He regretted going to the bar, he regretted meeting James, he regretted the kiss. He didn’t know why. 

 

They didn’t see each other for the rest of the day. Tony did not come for dinner. Then, Steve had watched a romance in his room and he had tried to picture himself with James, but every time, Tony’s disappointed look popped up in his fantasies and ruined the mood.

 

Steve cogitated in his bed, he was anxious about his heat. There were only two days left. He still didn’t have a mate and for the first time, it felt lonely. Steve had never really contemplated his life with a mate. He had never felt the desire, he had never thought that he would want it. He had never realized he was so lonely…

 

Steve felt a wave of warmth in his body. He was sweating. He slid his hand down his shirt and pulled it up a little, revealing his tight and defined abs to the fresh air around him. He wiped the moist off his belly and was breathing heavily because of the warmth. His hand naturally sneaked down his pants to scratch his hairs. He was becoming hard. He wanted to be touched and he didn’t want to be alone. He started caressing himself, thinking about the kiss and licked his lips in desire. James’s card was in his hand. He brought it to his nose. He could still smell his scent. The powerful Alpha scent that sent shivers down his spine. He was fully hard now and he stopped himself from stroking his cock. He didn’t want to come by himself. He called the number. The phone didn’t even ring once.

 

« Steve? » The Alpha voice questioned.

 

« I want you. » Steve whispered. 

 

« Where are you? » 

 

« In my bed. »

 

« Do you want me to come? »

 

« Yes. »

 

The dark haired man was in his room, Steve could barely distinguish his face in the dark. He could sense his overwhelming power. He felt safe. 

He was lying down on his bed, naked, his hand on his hard member. He was waiting for his lover to tell him what to do.

 

« What do you want? » The voice said. Steve felt his ass wetting at the sound of it.

 

« I want to feel you. I want to touch you. I want you inside of me. »

 

The man smirked and took off his coat slowly and languorously. He was smiling and staring at Steve with his dark Alpha eyes. Steve couldn’t turn away. He felt overpowered. He wanted to submit. He felt his bed soaking with his juice. He spread his legs wide and held his ass up.

 

The man unbuttoned his shirt slowly and teasingly while Steve’s heart was pumping in his chest. His watering mouth was opened. The Alpha came to the bed and bent over Steve, settling between his legs. Steve couldn’t move. The man was rubbing his crotch against Steve’s balls. The powerful hands took hold of Steve’s head and brought him closer. Steve could feel his breath on his lips and the beard was scratching his chin, sending shivers through his whole body.

The kiss was even better, Steve’s tongue was burning. He was jerking his hips, rubbing his dick against the jeans of the other man.

The man lay down on Steve’s body, pushing Steve’s head in the pillows. Steve spread his legs wider. The kiss never stopped. One hand stroked down Steve’s neck and continued its journey to his chest and went down his hips to finish its course on his asscheek. The other caressed his cheek and slid the thumb in Steve’s mouth, interrupting their kiss. Steve was so hot. The thumb went down his mouth pulling and thrusting. Steve could feel the warmth breath descending down on his neck and his chest. The beard brushed against his nipple and Steve moaned with pleasure. his cock was dripping. The mouth went down his belly and both hands drifted down his flanks to his hips. Steve was trembling with desire. His eyes were closed and he savored the touch.

« Tony! » he moaned with pleasure.

Tony took Steve’s cock in his hands and squeezed it gently. He started moving up and down. Steve felt another wave of slick. Tony’s hand accelerated. Steve’s heart beat stronger. He was close.

« Tony! » repeated Steve in a moan. « Tony please fuck me. »

He felt three fingers penetrate him at ounce and he came on his hands.

Steve opened his eyes. He was in his bed. His right hand sticky with come, still holding his cock. His left fingers slippery.

He wanted to cry.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading. I hope you enjoyed it. Comments (even negatives ones) and kudos are really appreciated.
> 
> NEXT TIME : Steve is only one day from his next heat and he is wondering why he dreamt about Tony.


	13. Steve makes a decision. (a good one I hope.)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve asks Tony for help.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for kudos and bookmarks. :-)
> 
> This is a very short chapter about Steve and Tony. I think it might help to understand why Tony is doing what he's doing.

 

So, Steve had his first wet dream. And it was about _Tony_.

Steve thought about it for a long time. There was only 4 possible reasons for that.

  1. Steve was going to be in heat soon. His senses were increased, his emotions were biased, his feelings were altered by the hormones, his sensitivity intensified. Tony was the strongest and more powerful Alpha around. He was bound to be affected by his presence at this point in his cycle.
  2. He had his first kiss the day before yesterday. He was oversensitive and emotional about it, especially so close to his heat. He had been thinking about James and got confused because of all the recent mixed feelings he had for Tony.
  3. He had been wanting to become friend with Tony, the way he was with the other Avengers. His hurt look yesterday had made him feel guilty and his subconscious had conveyed his wanting to make up for it quite strangely.
  4. He had feelings for… Nope! Definitely not that. There were definitely only 3 possible reasons for that.



 

The thing is, it had felt so real. Steve had been so wanting, so eager for Tony’s touch that he was still feeling dizzy. He wanted to see Tony more than anything right now. He was confused. Whether it was because of his heat or because of something else, he had not idea right now and somehow it wasn’t so important. His heat was going to be tomorrow. Today he was supposed to leave for the mansion. Tony had had a special room set up especially for this. He had just a last check up to do with Bruce before leaving and he was going to live the same torture as the last time. The burning desire, the humiliation, the ache all over his body, the pain inside, the feeling of emptiness, of rejection, of uselessness. Steve needed to find a mate. Bruce was right. He should live this, he should do this thing so he would finally know. 

 

He would ask Tony. This dream was not a coincidence. Maybe it was meant to be. Him and Tony. It all made sense now. He should ask Tony. He should ask now, before his heat alters his will-power. Tony had rejected him the first time because he hadn’t been thinking rationally, not because he didn’t want him. He might accept him if he was asking now, while he still had all his senses. He would ask a friend a favor. He would ask him to help him as his teammate, for the sake of the team. This was the best option, and the only one if he wanted to avoid the same agony as last time.

 

After a good shower, Steve, his most advantageous outfit on, resolutely went down in the common area. It was empty. Clint and Natasha had been sent on a mission. It was best that they were gone now that he was so close to his heat. Bruce was probably in his lab. He would join him up later for his check up. If everything were to work fine, it would probably be the last time he would need someone to take care of him during this particular time. Bruce was working on making him suppressants and soon he would be free of most of the inconvenience of being Omega. He still had the gender change operation in his mind though. After tomorrow, he would be certain. He would know if this was the best for him or not. Tony would help him with that too. 

Tony was probably in his workshop. Steve asked JARVIS for confirmation and headed down to Tony’s lair. 

 

Steve hadn’t been down there much often, mainly because he hated the guy, also because every time he had come here it had been to argue with him. Despite that, he had always been fascinated by the workshop. All the gadgets, all the technology, all the robots… Even though Steve was not much of a fan of technology he would always be amazed with all this magic around him. Besides, every time, he felt like Tony was true, raw. Tony was not wearing his mask in his workshop. He loved to see how enthusiastic, how focused, how radiant Tony was when he was working. Steve thought it was beautiful.

He waited for JARVIS to grant him access and penetrated the room. 

Tony was concentrated on his work. He didn’t turn to him. He admired him for a few second before coughing to announce his presence in the room.

 

« Captain. » Tony said without moving, still focused on what he was doing.

 

« I thought, you didn’t hear me coming. » Steve started.

 

« I could scent that seductive smell of yours long before you were in the room. » Tony were still turning his back to him. 

 

Steve blushed from head to toe and smiled. He was stopped in his resolve. He stammered.

 

« hum… Sorry. »

 

« What can I do for you, Capsicle?

 

Steve hesitated a bit before finally taking his chance.

 

«  Hum, actually, I need you. I was wondering if you’d agree to … to help me with something. »

 

Steve paused. He felt embarrassed and it helped that Tony wasn’t looking at him but at the same time, it felt a bit cold. Tony was still focused on his work and somehow he could feel some kind of tension in the air.

 

« I know what you’re going to say, Captain. And the answer is ‘No’. » Tony interjected.

 

Steve felt his confidence ebb away. 

 

« But… Why not? » Steve didn’t let Tony discourage him. He wanted Tony and he would have him. He was Alpha after all. Alphas get what they want. « I mean, you didn’t even let me explain. »

 

Tony didn’t turn around but he had stopped tampering about the gadgets on his stall.

 

« I need this Tony. » Steve continued. « It doesn’t have to change our relationship. It’s just, helping a teammate… a friend. » Steve felt his temperature rising in his body. He breathed heavily. « I… You already saw me. You’re the only one who saw that part of me… You… You won’t have to do anything else. You can keep doing what you’ve always done. I won’t… I won’t intrude in your life… »

 

« I’m not going to be your mate, Steve. No way. Why would you want me as a mate anyway? Why don’t you ask your boyfriend… James, is that it? »

 

Steve was taken aback, he did not expect Tony to react this way. He was being rejected again and it hurt.

 

« I don’t want James. James is a stranger. I want _you_. I trust _you_. » Steve objected. 

 

Tony smirked and finally turned around. He crossed his arms on his chest. 

 

Steve saw the arc reactor through Tony’s shirt and his heart skipped. This technologic jewel had always impressed him, but this time, Steve couldn’t shake off the fact that it was actually connected to his heart and keeping him alive from his thought. Steve had always known but, somehow, right now, he had finally grasped the importance of it.

 

« You trust me, huh? » Tony said in a sarcastic tone. 

 

« You know I do. I always have. » Steve answered softly.

 

« Always? » Tony raised his eyebrow in doubt.

 

« Maybe not at the very beginning but I realized soon that I was wrong about you. » Steve explained.

 

« So…  Tell me how this is gonna happen, Cap? » Tony pouted. « We fuck for 2 days long and then we go back to this fucked-up not-friends-but-we-tolerate-each-other relationship? This is what you want? »

 

Steve nodded « This is the best option. The most sensible one. We’re teammates. We’re not particularly close and I know I can trust you with my life. Feelings don’t have to come into play. You’re the best mate for me. You’re a powerful Alpha pack and I’ll be safe with you. You just have to take care of my heats and I won’t ask anything else from you. You don’t have anyone as far as I know. If you ever meet someone then we’ll break our bond. We’ll keep this professional. »

 

As Steve was saying all this he knew he didn’t really mean it but he didn’t know exactly what he wanted. He wasn’t sure about his desires and couldn’t say anything else.

Tony’s jaw dropped down as Steve was talking. When he had finished, he smirked again.

 

« Wow. You really thought this through, didn’t you? »

 

« Of course, this is the best for the team. We’ll keep this between us. No one will interfere. »

 

« Yeah, for the team of course. You’re so fucking perfect, huh? Always putting everyone else first? Captain America is not having a mate because he needs to save the world, huh? » 

 

Tony was angry. Steve didn’t understand why. He should be the one who was angry. 

 

« Well _I’m_ not perfect. I’m not perfect and I won’t do this for the sake of the ‘team’ or any other ‘good cause’ that’s so important to you. I’m not a team player. I’m fine being an asshole. 

Find yourself another living dildo to satisfy your needs. Now, you should go because your smell is messing with my brain. Why are you still here anyway? Aren’t you supposed to go to the mansion?» Tony’s eyes were burning, his facial expression hard and cold.

 

Steve didn’t answer. He looked down, his face red with shame, anger and disappointment. He had been rejected again, and this time not out of respect. This time he was rejected because he was unwanted, hated, despised. Steve felt a weigh in his chest and didn’t find the strength to say anything other than. « I get it. » and left.

 

He went to see Bruce. Why delay this any longer? He was going to experience his second heat, alone, again.

 

He didn’t mention his conversation with Tony. Bruce had noticed his troubled face but didn’t say anything. This is what Steve appreciated with Bruce. He always respected your privacy and even though he was a very good listener when you needed it, he would never pressure you and always wait for you to confide in him, without ever judging you.

 

After the check up, Bruce drove Steve to the mansion and explained everything. It was safer that it was Bruce because he was the least affected by Steve’s scent. Bruce finally left and Steve was alone in the huge mansion of which in didn’t even know one quarter of the rooms. 

 

He went to his room and fell on the bed. He could already feel the symptoms. It was going to be a long night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know that both Steve and Tony haven't really evolved in their relationship but, like I said, I think this chapter shows more where they stand exactly.
> 
> I will try to upload the next part tomorrow or the day after. It shouldn't be to long before Steve and Tony have real sex. (maybe 2 or 3 more chapters)
> 
> NEXT TIME : Steve has his 2nd heat.


	14. Steve wants Tony. (a little bit too much)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve is pleasuring himself during his heat and fantasizes about Tony.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for kudos, comments and bookmarks. :-)
> 
> Sorry but the story isn't going to move forward. This chapter is basically pure smut. I originally didn't want to write Steve's second heat in detail but then I did... I don't have anything to answer for myself.
> 
> If this is not your thing. Just skip the chapter entirely. There's nothing relevant for the plot in it.

Steve was hot. He had taken a cold bath in hope of weakening or at least delaying the effect of the heat on his body but it didn’t work. So Steve decided to put on his more comfortable clothes and try his best to bear with it. He was desperately trying to control his feeling. He had always had a strong and willful mind. He could endure torture, manipulation, mental control. He could defy hydra’s worst officers. So why couldn’t he fight this?

 

Steve thought about Bruce’s words. Maybe, it was time for him to accept it. Just this once. Letting it go. He let his mind wander. He thought about the kiss. He thought about Bucky. He missed him terribly. Thinking about it, maybe Steve had been a little in love with his beta friend. He was so young at that time. He didn’t understand what it was. He tried to think of anything other than Tony. He didn’t want to think about him, because thinking about Tony hurt. He couldn’t stop himself though. 

He kept thinking about his Alpha power surrounding him. The feeling of being safe, of being where he was supposed to. His Alpha scent that made him go crazy. His body was now burning with desire. Those clothes needed to go.

 

Steve was now lying on the bed, naked. He let his hands explore his body. His hand wandered all over his skin. He could feel his hairs shiver from the tip of his fingers. He touched his nipple, thinking about how good it felt when Natasha had pinched it. He caressed it slowly and felt his body tremble all over. He pressed delicately on it, then pinched it hard and he felt his slick flowing down. He touched his chest and his belly, caressed his hips and the inside of his thigh. His finger brushed over his entrance and rubbed the already wet rim slightly. His cock jolted, wanting attention and he felt his mouth water. He remembered the kiss and how good it felt to have something hot and soft inside. He took his cock in his hand and judged the size and the shape of it and he thought about Tony’s. How big would it be, how hot it would be to hold it in his hand. He licked his lips imagining what it would feel like to have it in his mouth, how hot it would be. He squeezed his dick hard until it hurt. He wanted to hurt himself, he wanted to hurt his body to forget how painful this desire was.

Then he remembered… Tony had given him toys that time. He hadn’t touched them. He hadn’t dared. So humiliating. Tony had thrown them to his face like a bone to a dog. 

He sat up quickly and felt dizzy so he crawled out of bed and walked to the chest of drawer on all fours. He rummaged through it until he found both of them. He examined them. The pink one was about normal size. A little smaller than his. The black one however was much bigger and much longer. He felt his ass wetting and his dick jolting at the thought of it. 

Back on the bed, Steve put his right hand back between his thighs, and rubbed softly. The other hand took the pink toy and he considered it for a second before bringing it to his mouth. He started licking the thing from the bottom to the top with the tip of his tongue. He closed his eyes to imagine Tony. His tongue licked hard and he finally slipped the toy in his mouth. It felt so good, so hot. He was now thrusting it hard and pushing the back of his throat with it. He was still teasing his hole with his other hand. He could feel a puddle of juice under his ass. His untouched dick was jolting and dripping precum in his navel. Steve was pushing harder and harder despite his gags and his tears rolling down his temples. He couldn’t stop himself. He wanted to hurt. He wanted the hunger, the desire to stop. Soon, he was pushing it deep down his throat, leaving it there as long as he could. He wanted more.

He slipped one finger inside, then two, then three. His hole was so loose and so slippery. He thrusted harder and faster, the pink thing still in his mouth. He wanted more, he wanted bigger, he wanted it deeper. He wanted to feel the emptiness inside of him. He took out his hand and grabbed his cock hard. He brought down the toy and shoved it slowly inside his ass, imagining Tony, while he squeezed his dick hard and started moving up and down. He raised his hips jerkily to have a better access. The toy felt so good inside his ass. He released the pressure on his cock a bit and instantly came on his fingers in quick spasms. He licked the come off his fingers. 

He was still hungry. His ass wanted more. His mouth wanted more. His cock softened for a second before hardening again. His ass squeezed on the toy and made his cock jolt. He wanted more. He took the other toy, the big one, and brought it to his mouth while thrusting hard inside him with the other one. The thing was so big that he couldn’t even put it into his mouth. He licked all over it and tried to put the tip inside. When it touched his palate, he felt his ass wet again and soon the pink toy was too small, he was adding fingers. He came a second time. 

But it wasn’t enough.  It was never enough. Every time he relieved his body, every time he complied to his desire, he felt lonelier and emptier inside. Steve kept coming and coming, filling his holes deeper and harder and faster each time. It was painful and lonely and humiliating and Steve hated himself.

 

When Bruce knocked on his door at 7 a.m the next day, Steve felt like he hadn’t slept at all. He was still sweaty and panting, exhausted. His body was still burning with desire. 

 

« Are you decent Cap? » 

 

Steve felt ashamed. He was a mess. He quickly got up, opened the windows to freshen the room, put on clothes and hid the mess he had done as best as he could. Then he went back to bed. 

 

« Yes »

 

Bruce didn’t judge. Instead, he looked concerned. He came to Steve, took his temperature, took samples and wiped his face gently with a wet cloth. 

 

« You’re burning up. Did you drink anything? You need to hydrate. It’s important! »

 

Bruce stood up and left for a second before coming back with fresh water and food. Steve was so grateful. 

 

« It looks like you’re not done with your heat. » He said. « You need to eat and drink to take strength. I’m sorry Steve, but this is going to be a long day. »

 

Bruce took samples and stayed with Steve for a little while before leaving to give him privacy.

 

 

Steve was able to sleep a little after eating, but it didn’t last long. He was soon woken up by a wave of heat invading his body. He woke up sweating and cock hard in his pants. His head full of Tony.

Steve took his member in his hand and squeezed hard to make the pain go away. Tony! Tony! _Tony_ …  He remembered Tony had set up his A.I in the mansion.

 

« Jarvis… ?  » He attempted.

 

« How can I help Mr. Rogers? »

 

« Vitals please. » 

 

« Body temperature: 100°F. Heartbeat: 145 beats a minute. No sign of injury or infection. Reproductive hormones production 88%. Pheromones emission: 130%. You are right in the middle of your heat, Sir. Estimated end: in 11 hours, 25 minutes. »

 

Steve whined with pain and disappointment. He tried to breathe to control the heat of his body.

 

« Thank you Jarvis… »

 

« At your service, Sir. »

 

Steve was plunged in a daze, his body was too hot and too painful. He was thinking of Tony.

 

« Is there anything I can help you with? » The AI continued.

 

Steve was startled at the question. He didn’t expect it. 

 

« Where is Tony? » The words had escaped his mouth.

 

« Mr Stark is his workshop, Sir. »

 

Steve instantly saw the slender figure of his Alpha focused on his work in his mind. He was radiant. He felt a wave of warmth and desire running through his body.

 

« What is he doing? »

 

« Mr Stark is currently having a rest on the cot. He has been working for most of the night. »

 

Steve imagined his sleeping face, how peaceful he must be, how cute. He wanted to touch his face and watch him sleep.

 

« Tell me about him, Jarvis. »

 

JARVIS spoke about Tony until the end of Steve’s heat, describing his actions with the flat British voice. And Steve shamefully relieved himself while picturing the scenes in his head.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the spelling and grammar mistakes. I didn't have the courage to read it more than twice.
> 
>  
> 
> NEXT TIME : Tension will rise up. Only one chapter left before they get down to it. 
> 
> I'll try to upload it tomorrow if I can.


	15. Steve is not Omega. (no matter what people think)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve is in denial again and Tony learns something that makes him angry. Tony is very controlling and not very tolerant.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading my work and leaving encouraging comments, kudos and bookmarks. :-)

A couple of days had passed since Steve’s second heat. Everything was back to normal. Steve really wondered why and how he could have been so obsessed with Tony. 

Really, Tony was just Tony. The same reckless, self-obsessed, pushy, annoying Tony. 

 

Steve had realized something though. He hated his heats. He hated his body. He hated being Omega. Being Omega was painful. Ever since he had discovered the sexual part of himself, he had been feeling insecure, empty, lonely and depressed. He didn’t want it. He didn’t want any of it. He was not going to live this miserable life. He wanted to go back to who he was before all that. He was Captain America. It didn’t matter if he was Alpha or not, Steve was over that. But he couldn’t get over the changes in his body and his feelings that being Omega supposed. He hadn’t been thinking straight, and had made poor choices and it had led him into embarrassing (at the best), dangerous (at the worst) situations. Not only he was affected by these changes during his heats, but now, he was also influenced when not in heat. How could he have thought about mating Tony otherwise? This omega-ness needed to go.

 

Therefore, when the alarm buzzed on because of an invasion of Alien robots, Steve felt a little happy to take his mind off things and go back to being who he was and had always been: Captain America. 

It was only him, Bruce, Sam and Tony since Clint and Natasha hadn’t come back from their mission and Thor was still in Asgard. As usual Tony was reckless and hasty. However, Steve couldn’t deny that their duo in the battlefield was perfect. They could foresee their actions and adapted their moves accordingly. It was harmonious. All their moves fit together perfectly like a choreography. It was even more obvious now that the team was incomplete. As much as he had wanted to recreate this harmonious cooperation with Sam who could fly just as Tony could. It was never as right as simple as honest has it was with Iron Man. 

Steve had to get used to the idea. Captain America and Iron Man were perfect together, even though Steve Rogers and Tony Stark hated each other.

 

Steve was busy fighting two bots with his shield, when he was grabbed by a third one from behind. Steve felt a laser burn his back for a second before he heard the Repulsor blast coming to rescue.

 

« You’re welcome, Captain. »

 

Steve had smiled at Tony’s words. He had his back. 

 

Tony was attacked in the air by two robots which were shooting at him. Steve threw his shield and it boomeranged on the two bots before coming back to him.

 

« You’re welcome, Stark. » He had said, smiling. 

 

Yes, Captain America and Iron Man were definitely perfect together. 

Steve felt good and happy despite the violence of the attack. He felt like himself again, which, he hadn’t been for a month, since he had started searching for a mate. He didn’t need a mate. He was sure now. 

 

The battle had been long and exhausting. With the reduced team, they had struggled a lot to annihilate the threat but they had managed in the end. They could be proud as they had avoided too much collateral damage and City property’s destruction.

 

Steve felt restless in the Quinjet, too much fighting, too much adrenaline. He was looking at the red and gold armor standing arm crossed in front of him and couldn’t stop a smile. The armor was beautiful. No matter how much of an asshole the man inside was, Iron Man was definitely a hero and a very good teammate. 

 

…

 

 

A little less than a month had passed already, Steve was back to being full time Captain America. The Avengers had been busy with Aliens attacks. Steve had had little time to think about his relationship with Tony.

He was just glad that he could face him normally despite the shame of his own behavior and the humiliation of his rejection. Tony hadn’t mentioned anything and had never again used this against him. So they maintained a status quo and Steve was fine with it. He had other things on his mind. 

 

Every time he had the chance, he would read information about the gender change operation. He was decided. He would go through with it if it was possible (Of course, there was still the serum issue). He had discussed it with Bruce and Natasha and had informed them of his decision. They had tried to protest a bit but he didn’t let them. They were good friends, they should understand and they finally did. Bruce had even provided him with a good name.

 

Today was a calm day. He had decided to take this as an opportunity to go and visit the best specialist to talk about it.

 

They had explained the procedures, the treatment, the operations. They had given him extra documentation. This was not an easy change. It needed time to reflect on the outcome. It needed psychologist’s assessment. It needed a lot of different specialists which would operate at different steps in the whole process. It needed to be sure, but Steve was sure, wasn’t he? Despite all the inconvenience and the risks he would go through with it, he thought. If it could work he would recover quickly anyway, right? The trick was just to try to stay discreet. He couldn’t risk the world knowing about Captain America’s gender issues. … Well, was it really worth it?

 

He had come home a little depressed about the long and intricate process it would imply. Maybe, Bruce was right after all. Maybe he needed a little more time. He had gone straight to his suite. He wanted to be alone. 

 

He put the documents on his desk and ran to his bed. He fell flat on his bed, and let out a big sigh. He was lost. What should he do?

 

« What the fuck is wrong with you? » 

 

Tony had once again broke into his room and was spewing his venom.  He had absolutely no idea why and was so not in the mood for arguing right now, whatever Tony had come to argue about.

 

« Hi Tony! » Steve tried to appease the atmosphere. He was still lying on his bed, his face in his pillows.

 

« Don’t fucking ‘hi tony’ me, Steve. »  Tony shouted angrily.

 

Steve got up slowly and sat on his bed, legs crossed.

 

« May I know what this is about? »

 

« Don’t play me for a fucking fool, Captain. » Tony was fuming. « You know _exactly_ what this is about. »

 

Steve was bothered now because, first, it really wasn’t a good time for fighting, second, he had absolutely no idea what this was about and third, he didn’t like when Tony was rude. But he decided not to add fuel to the fire and tried to keep calm. 

 

« I really don’t, Tony. » He said apologetically.

 

This had been a small success because Tony had, at least, stopped shouting. Instead he talked in low hurt voice.

 

« This. » Tony was holding the documentation in his hand. « Seriously? Steve, what the FUCK? »

 

Steve opened his mouth in shock and didn’t respond. Of course, that was what it was about. Of course he would know. How could he keep things from him when he lived in his F… tower (Steve wouldn't let himself be rude. Even now.) Steve should have known better.

Or, was it his friends? Did they tell him? Had they sent him up to lecture him?

 

« I mean, How? How, in Odin’s name, could you ever consider it, even for a second? Have you lost your mind? » Tony spurted.

 

« Is it Bruce? Or Natasha maybe? » asked Steve, getting angry himself at the betrayal.

 

Tony was horrified. 

 

« They knew? They fucking knew and didn’t do anything to stop you? The Fuck! What’s wrong with all of you. Am I the only one here with enough common sense to see how fucked up this is? 

I’m gonna have a word. We seriously need to discuss about how this pack works.  I swear I’m gonna kill them. »

 

« I don’t see how this is your business or theirs, as a matter of fact. »

 

« Of course it’s my business Steve. You’re pack. Every thing that can impact on the Pack is my business. It’s _our_ business. You’re Captain Fucking America. You’re an Avenger, you’re our Captain. We fucking live together, for fuck’s sake. Are you serious, right now? »

 

« Can you stop with the F-word? How can we have a constructive discussion when you can’t stop swearing. I have had enough lectures for today. »

 

Tony what fuming again. He started laughing nervously. 

 

« You did not just say that, did you? »

 

Steve didn’t answer that, he thought that if he did, it might degenerate, instead he explained himself.

 

« This is my life, Tony » Steve started, staring into space. « I can’t live this life anymore. This isn’t me. I’m not omega, Tony, I’m not. You need to understand. »

 

Tony laughed even harder.

 

« You! You of all people! You’re ‘ _not Omega_ ’! … That is the biggest joke I have ever heard, Steve. Ha Ha ha ha… You! Not Omega. Are you for real? »

 

Tony’s look intensified and his smile darkened. His expression was hard. He started acting like the pack alpha he was.

 

« You! You fucking dare say you’re not omega with that shameful body of yours. »

 

Steve wanted to protest but he was hypnotized by Tony’s Alpha eyes and voice.

 

« You’re screaming Omega Steve, every part of you sweats Omega. Ever since I laid my eyes on you I knew. You wanna pretend that you’re not when everything you do is Omega: every action, every move, every breath you take is Omega?»

 

Tony climbed on the bed and looked Steve in the eyes. Steve couldn’t escape his stare, couldn’t move, couldn’t control anything. Tony crawled over him and Steve slowly lay down on his bed, under the pressure of his Alpha’s intense gaze. Tony was above him, his face really close. He was blowing air on his mouth. Steve was turned on. His eyes were begging for a kiss, he plunged them into Tony’s. His heart was going to explode in his chest, he was holding his breath. Suddenly, there were no Avengers, no Aliens, no surgery, no heats, no friends, no disagreement, no fight, no teasing… There was just him, and Tony. This was true, this was right, this was what he wanted. 

 

« Look at yourself, Rogers. Look how submissive you are. » He was smirking. « You were made for it. You were made to subdue to Alpha. _This_ is who you are. »

 

Steve was too confused to be hurt. Tony stood up and got off the bed. Steve was still lying on his bed, unable to move, breathing heavily. He was scared, scared of Tony, scared of his mesmerizing power, scared of losing control completely, scared of himself.

 

« Stop fighting it. Stop bullshitting yourself and stop bullshitting us. » Tony continued as he took the documentation and went to the door. He turned around to Steve and looked coldly at him. He held up the documentation and started to tear it down slowly with an angry stare toward him.

 

« JARVIS? » he was asking with an angry but flat tone. 

 

« Sir? » The AI answered instantly.

 

« You are to remove access for Mr Rogers to anything even remotely close to gender issues and gender change on any device he is able to use. Phone, Computer, Tablets… »

 

« It is done, Sir. » 

 

« And, I want to be informed if Mr Rogers or anyone else living in the Tower has a live or a phone conversation on anything of the sort. »

 

« Indeed, Sir. »

 

« Thank you, JARVIS » Tony had glared at Steve while he spoke every word. When he had finished he threw a threatening look as if saying _I’ve got my eyes on you_ and left.

 

He left Steve, feeling even more depressed than he already was. It took him more than half an hour to catch his breath again. 

 

« Jarvis ? » He had tried when he was himself again. 

 

« Mr Rogers. ? »

 

« You’re not actually going to do this are you? »

 

« I am genuinely sorry about the intrusion into your private matters Mr Rogers, but I’m afraid I have to. »

 

« Isn’t this illegal or something? »

 

« It is. But I wasn’t programmed to do what is legal, though I am perfectly able to provide legal advice if you ever need to, I was programmed to do what Mr Stark asks me to. »

 

« Indeed you were. Thank you anyway, for your concern. »

 

« The pleasure is mine. »

 

Tony was the worst asshole of all times.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to add that the characters are entitled to their own opinion that belongs to them... 
> 
> So it ends a little badly... but NEXT TIME : FINALLY!!! ( I say 'finally', but it is far for being the end of the story... I'd say maybe it is the middle of the story...)
> 
> I don't think I'll be able to upload before 3 or 4 days. Sorry.
> 
> Also: don't hesitate to leave a comment if you don't like the story, or my writing, or the chapter, or where this is going, or if you want to correct my poor grammar and vocabulary.


	16. Steve is discovering his body.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Avengers go to a mission which turns badly, especially for Steve and Tony.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you much for the kudos, bookmarks and encouraging comments.
> 
> So this is one of the first scenes I had imagined before I started writing. It may appear redundant but actually, this was planned long before... However I completely changed the way I brought up the situation. (as well as what is going to follow after)  
> I tried to write the mission the best I could but this is not my best skill. The mission is just an excuse for the romance, I wish I could have a real built plot in the background but I just can't do it... :'(
> 
> I hope you enjoy it nevertheless.
> 
> WARNING: Actual Sex at the end.

« You shouldn’t come, Cap. »

 

« Of course, I am going! »

 

« It’s not safe. »

 

« For God’s sake, Bruce, you said it’s in two days. _Two_ days. »

 

« Bruce is right, though, Steve. It might take a bit longer than usual. What if it happens when we’re there? This could be dangerous for you. We can manage. »

 

« Nat, please? I can perfectly go to this mission in the state I am now. And if anything were to happen… Well… I’ll endure it. »

 

« Wow, Cap must really be desperate to be ready to go that far just to get laid. »

 

Natasha punched Clint in the shoulder.  « Really not Funny Clint » and then she continued. « You can’t possibly mean that, can you? »  She looked at him worryingly. 

 

Steve had been in a bad place lately. He had done nothing but straining himself at work or at the gym. Trying to forget about the control, the intrusion, the _raping_ of his private life by a certain Someone. Trying to forget about the fear of losing control, of losing himself when _he_ was around. Luckily, has hadn’t been and Steve had done everything to avoid him. They had literally not seen each other except on the battlefield. It was not the same. When in a fight they could pretend they were not Steve Rogers and Tony Stark. They were only Captain America and Iron Man. Steve used his commanding Captain voice and ignored the person behind the faceplate. As for Tony, well, Steve had no idea what or how he felt about this and he couldn’t care less. _At least, he tried to._

 

_«_ Steve? » she asked as he seemed in his thought. 

 

« I’m OK. I swear. This is my job, this is what I was made for. I can do this. I have to do this. I’m coming and that’s it.»

His voice had started hesitantly but became resolved at his last words. He was the Captain and that was it. He was stubborn and nobody could prevent him from doing anything when he was certain it was the right thing to do. Nobody even bothered trying to change his mind despite their disapproving. 

 

They all left to suit up and met a couple of minutes later, ready to go. Iron Man was waiting in front of the Quinjet. Silently. Steve was secretly grateful that he had been waiting the last moment to come, maybe he was avoiding him too, he thought. 

 

The last incident had really shaken Steve off. Tony had pointed him two aspects that he wasn’t ready to admit. First, they had probably been right. Steve must really be Omega. Who was he kidding? Even if he refused it to be true, he knew deep inside that he was. He’d always known.

Secondly, and that was the worst. He _couldn’t_ resist him. He _couldn’t_ resist Tony. As much as he hated him, every time he glanced at him with his Alpha look, he felt weak in his knees. 

 

He even went to ask Fury about it. After a debriefing, he had shyly stayed behind, trying to hide a growing blush.

«Captain? Do you have anything you want to add? » Fury had said with a questioning look. 

« hum… no… hum … this is… kinda …. private. » Steve had muttered. 

« Oh, that thing… » Fury had said slightly relieved.

Steve had asked and he had not liked the answer: « Nobody, even the most powerful Alpha, can control you, and they absolutely can’t submit you when you’re not in heat, unless… you actually want it to… » 

 

Steve had not told anyone about the incident with Tony. He wanted to talk about it with Natasha. She would have defended him, probably, but he had never brought it up. He was too ashamed. Instead he had indulged himself in what he was best at, what he was confident he could do perfectly: being an Avenger, being a superhero.

 

The flight to their destination was short. Or at least, Steve thought so, because he was focused on the upcoming mission and they were debriefing, trying to come up with a plan. This might be a little more complicated than it usually was. They had noticed unusual activity on a former military base. They had been sent to investigate. There was strong probability it was Hydra and they had very little information about it. This was why they were all coming, except Thor.

 

It was a trap. 

 

When they got there, they saw that the enemy had been well prepared for their arrival. Soon alien robots attacked them from every side, forcing them to separate. 

 

They kept coming from everywhere. Then Hydra men shot at them from afar. The avengers were dispersed and isolated. They managed to hold the defense nevertheless. After a while, they were getting the upper hand but they were far from winning.

 

« They seem to be launching something in the air » Sam had said. « Looks like a small vessel or a flying capsule? »

 

« This might be something important that they are trying to save » Steve said.

 

« Or maybe they are sending a message. » Natasha said « in any case, we should intercept it. »

 

« I can fly to it and put a tracker on it. » Tony suggested.

 

« Let’s not rush things. We don’t know what it is. It might be dangerous. » Steve tempered. 

 

« What if they are calling for more alien help? » Clint asked. 

 

« We can’t risk not knowing what it is. This might be potentially dangerous. » Natasha added.

 

« We can’t risk Tony’s life or any other’s either. » Steve ordered.

 

« I suggest we stop arguing before we let this chance go. I’m doing it. » Tony decided.

 

« You can’t do that Iron Man. You’re not doing it. It’s an order. »

 

Iron man rushed to catch the flying capsule, ignoring his Captain’s order. As usual. 

 

Steve and Natasha saw the red suit flying in the sky and touching the capsule. It exploded. 

 

« TONY NO! »

 

Natasha had seen in his eyes that he would run to him. Men were coming to her and she had to let him go on his own. The others were already pretty busy.

 

There was a big crater of burnt where Tony had landed. The suit seemed really damaged. He was not moving, not answering in his coms. Not responding. Steve rushed to him and knelt down to open the faceplate. Tony was unconscious. He checked his pulse. He was still alive. Steve was relieved but still really worried. Even if he didn’t like the guy he was a valuable teammate.

 

He caught his arms and put them around him. He was going to carry him. He called for Sam. No answer. Natasha. She answered out of breath. He could hear shots and explosions. Sorry she had said but they were busy with squadrons of robots and snipers were shooting at them. Sam was alright but his coms had been damaged. Steve was alone.

 

He took Tony on his shoulders and looked for a safe place to go to and wondered who he could call as back ups to send Tony to medicals.

 

He was too focused on bringing Tony to safety he didn’t notice. Soon they were surrounded. 

The last thing he remembered was trying not to let Iron Man fall from his grasp. 

 

Steve woke up in a sort of dirty basement. His body was completely tied down. He was on fetal position on the floor. His hands joined behind his back. He was gagged too. His head hurt like hell. He looked in front of him. _Tony_. The Iron Man suit was lying on the floor, still like a dead shell. One could think it was an old thrown away armor, who would have known, there was a man inside. 

 

He wanted to try contacting the others but they had taken his coms. God he hoped they wouldn’t be able to use them. Good thing that Tony had protected them with high tech security system. He stayed in this position maybe for an hour or two. He had stopped counting. When he was not worrying about the rest of the team. He was thinking about his relationship with Tony. It couldn’t stay like this. He was looking at the unmoving shiny red and gold covered in dust. He didn’t dare think about it. Tony hadn’t moved for hours. What if he was dead? He had no way of checking. He felt desperate and very scared. And hot. 

He felt his body temperature increasing. He was sweating. _Oh no_. It was starting. Damn Bruce, he had said _two_ days. Steve felt his face going red and his body quivering. 

There were footsteps not far from them. Oh God no. It was happening, again. and Tony was still inert.

The footsteps were coming closer. They were soon going to be here. He could hear at least four people. They were rhythmic heavy steps. Probably Men, military training. The door opened, he could feel the vibration of their steps on the floor. The four men surrounded him. He could see two pairs of boots. He didn’t want to look up. 

 

« Captain America! » a familiar accent said. « The perfect super soldier. Erskin’s best success. Who would have known?»

 

Steve trembled with fear and disgust. _Red Skull._ How come? He was supposed to be dead. 

 

« Years I have been spending, trying to get as much information as possible about you. But _that_ I would have never imagined. Perfect Captain America is Omega. What a joke. And here I thought about a genius plan to get you here and prepared hundreds different way to torture you. Had I known you would actually deliver yourself to me on a plate, and in heat… Life is full of surprises. Don’t worry, my men here are going to take good care of you. »

 

Red Skull was beta. He was gonna have his men rape Steve. Steve was trying to mentally prepare himself to endure. His friends had warned him and he had said he would. Now was the time to prove it. 

He was happy about one thing though. He now seemed to be able to control himself a lot better. He was not sure he would let them if he wasn’t tied up. That was an improvement at least.

 

Red Skull kicked him in the guts twice and he left the room saying « I want five Alphas here in ten minutes. This is going to be quite the show. I wish his little shiny friend hear could attend too. Do you think he would enjoy? »

Steve gasped with the blow and tried to catch his breath after they left. He looked at Tony. _Please Tony, do not wake up to see that_ he thought.

He was trying to think of a way to escape but it was very hard to concentrate with the burning desire growing inside of him. He thought there might be an opportunity here. They might let their guards down when doing the deed. Steve was trying to be hopeful to avoid freaking out about what was going to happen.

He smiled internally at the irony. He had avoided being taken by his friends and had almost been taken advantage of by strangers in the street and had still kept his virginity intact. And all that for what? being raped by Red Skull’s hydra soldiers. Shit! Life was really unfair. He looked at Tony again. Why couldn’t he save him again, huh? He was lifeless.

 

Red Skull and five Alphas came back. Steve sensed their presence instantly. He was aroused, deeply, but still in control. They untied his legs and removed the gag. Steve could have tried to escape but even if he was still in control, his resolve was not as strong as to fight five men pinning him down. Red Skull let out an evil laugh. Steve gave a worried glance to the Iron Man suit. Red Skull saw it  « How touching, are you worried about you little friend here? » and he kicked the armor in the head. _TONY_! Steve resolve was weakening. He wasn’t sure he could endure.

 

The men started to unwrap their present. Soon Steve was butt naked, on his knees, his shoulders pinned down on the floor. He felt the first cock on his already wet rim. He closed his eyes and tried not to crave for it but he couldn’t help wanting it a little. Red Skull was next to them, watching perversely, an evil grin on his ugly red face. Steve decide to open his ass up to avoid pain at the first thrust (or maybe he wasn’t that much in control.) but it never came.

 

The first repulsor beam grilled Red Skull’s head. The second attacked the man behind Steve. The men were slow to react, still bedazzled by Steve’s scent. They were unarmed and caught by surprise. Steve felt his heart jump. Knowing that Tony was alive, that he had saved him, _again_ , had given him enough strength and resolve to fight back. He stood up and head-butted the man in front of him in the process. He still had his hands attached but he kicked and hit as much as he could. Tony was shooting at them, one after the other. Soon, the six men were down. Steve was standing in the middle of a stack of bodies, butt-naked with his hands tied down behind his back. Now that he was out of danger his arousal was taking control of his body and mind again. He looked at the Iron Man armor still laid down on the floor. He could sense the powerful Alpha inside and he really turned him on. Iron Man stayed still for a moment and opened his helmet. Tony was staring at Steve with piercing eyes which sent a wave of warmth in his body. He was smiling. 

 

Steve freed himself quite easily and rushed toward him. He knelt down beside him and bent his head down in submission. He felt extremely hot and desiring but he didn’t move. He was waiting. His hands, though freed from any bond, were still behind his back. Tony didn’t say anything, he was just smiling at him. 

 

« Alpha… » Steve muttered. 

 

« You’re butt-naked. » Tony chuckled but stopped quickly as it seemed to hurt him a lot. A blush came on Steve’s face but he still checked on his Alpha.

 

« You’re hurt. »

 

« Yeah. Probably a few broken ribs. And maybe a strain on my right shoulder. Also I can’t move my legs, probably burnt… And the suit is wrecked.»

 

Steve’s expression became horrified.

 

« I need to get us out of here. » 

 

Steve tried to fight the effects of his heat but hardly succeeded. He was still kneeling down next to Tony. 

 

« Yeah, we’ll do that… but before that I’m gonna take care of you. »

 

Steve awed, his eyes brightened as he was hiding a smile. 

 

« What? Here? You… You don’t have to do that… »

 

« Yes I do. I really do. I’m not gonna let a fucking hydra agent take your first time. Besides, none of us could go anywhere in this state. And it’s not like I could resist you, even if I wanted to, which I don’t by the way. The air-filter is damaged so at this point, I’m probably as turned on as you are, and inside the suit, it really hurts. »

 

« You can’t Tony. You’re going to get hurt. »

 

« I’m going to get hurt if I _don’t_ do this. »

 

Steve smiled. He was still looking down, hiding his face which was probably as red as the suit right now. He didn't know what to say. 

 

«  Now Pinky face, I need you to do something first. » Tony continued and Steve nodded. « I need you to check on these men and make sure they won’t be potential danger to us. Then you must secure the entrance so we won’t be disturbed. »

 

Steve stood in a leap and started to put his pants back up but was stopped half-way.

 

« Don’t. You’ll have to take it off again anyway. Let me see. » 

 

Steve felt happy and flattered and blushed again. 

He carried out his Alpha’s orders quickly and efficiently. He surprised himself at how easily he could do what he was asked to do despite his state. It was a huge improvement compared to his previous heat which had turned him into a helpless sex animal. Maybe knowing that he was gonna get what he wanted afterward had helped. 

During that short time, Tony tried to remove parts of his suit, with difficulty. When Steve was done he came back to the same submissive position, on his knees, hands behind his back. His body was on fire but he was still waiting.

 

« Good Baby. Good. Come down to me. » Tony gestured him to lower his head towards him. All his moves were slow and awkward as if they were demanding strenuous and painful efforts. He brought his hand to Steve’s face and brushed his cheek with his fingers.

 

« You’re amazing. So obedient. So beautiful. » Two of Tony’s fingers slipped in his watering mouth. And Steve moaned and started sucking at them. 

 

« You’re perfect. Why would you ever wanna change that about you? You’re so perfect.» 

 

Steve was burning inside. He felt his slick flow down on his pants and couldn’t care less about staining his Captain America suit. He kept sucking with all his might on Tony’s fingers, moaning like a slut. They were hot inside his mouth and exploring further and further. It was much better than the toy, so much better. His cock was jolting hard against his belly and hurt.

 

« I’m sorry, handsome. I won’t be able to take you properly for your first time. You’re gonna have to help me here. I’m really sorry I should wait but I can’t stop myself either. »

 

Steve didn’t mind. He wasn’t even sure he understood. It was so good already, so right, so perfect. His Alpha was finally looking at him, seeing him, accepting him. He was in total bliss.

 

« Touch yourself a little bit. If you don’t come first, I won’t be able to satisfy you, I don’t have enough strength in me right now. »

 

Steve took his cock in hand.

 

« No. Not the front. Touch yourself from behind. I won’t let you touch your dick. »  

 

Steve obeyed every words, feeling bliss. It was what he was supposed to do. It felt so right. 

Tony’s fingers slipped out of his mouth and his hand cupped his chin gently. Tony was caressing his face like he was the most precious thing he had ever seen. Steve was slightly disappointed by the sudden emptiness in his mouth but enjoyed deeply the affectionate gesture. 

 

« Put two fingers inside and thrust deep. » Tony ordered. 

 

Steve executed. His cock jolted and he started dripping. He pushed hard inside.

 

"Slow down. You’re gonna hurt yourself. Don’t be so greedy. Take your time. Pleasure yourself. » 

 

Steve started to rub slowly his inside and touched a particularly sensitive spot. He whined in pleasure. 

 

« I can see you found your prostate. »

 

Steve had never taken the time to explore his body enough to discover this about himself. And Tony knew. 

 

« Put a third finger inside. » Tony continued with a languorous Alpha voice that made Steve’s head spin and his body vibrate. His moving hand was all over Steve’s body. 

 

« What an amazing body. Why would you want to mutilate it? You’re so amazing. Don’t change. Don’t ever change. » 

 

Steve came in a long desperate whine. 

 

« Good boy. Perfect. You’re so beautiful. » the alpha voice whispered.

 

Steve was catching his breath while Tony was fondling his body. He was still hard.

 

« Now, help me a little bit. I need to take off the rest of the suit. It hurts too much. » 

 

Trembling hands bustled about Tony’s armor in excitement and uncertainty. When Steve finally removed the groin piece of the armor his heart beat fast. He was going to see it for the first time. Steve stopped moving and stared with admiration and envy at the huge bump under the fabric of Tony’s expensive underwear. He wanted to touch but he didn’t dare.

 

« You can touch it if you want. But only with your face. » Tony muttered domineeringly. 

 

Steve bent over Tony and cocked his head to his member. Steve brushed his nose delicately on the rock hard cock trapped in silk. He got intoxicated with the musky male Alpha smell. It smelled so good. He wanted this smell on him. He wanted _Tony’s_ smell on him. He touched it with the tip of his lips with envy, waiting for permission.

 

« You wanna take it in your mouth? »

 

Steve so wanted to take it in his mouth. He delicately took the brim of the underwear and freed the throbbing cock. It was beautiful, thick and big. Bigger than Steve’s. It was already wet. Steve hesitated for a second but Tony’s left hand pushed his head down. He licked the drop of precum off the glans and tasted Tony, tasted _Alpha_ for the first time. Steve wanted more. He slowly slid along the rod, paying attention to his teeth. 

 

Steve was sucking a cock for the first time. Four months ago he would have bit it off with his teeth in this situation. He would have thrown up thinking about it. And now, it seemed the most instinctive, the most natural, the most heavenly. 

 

His pants were soaked with his juice and his cock was dripping. He swallowed the cock with fervor. Tony was a good teacher. He had said how to take it all. He had taught how to take it in his throat without gagging. He had pushed firmly Steve’s head down until his nose was buried in his pubes. Steve thought for a second that he could die like this. Every time his breathing was blocked, he felt like he would be happy to die this way. He was so happy that he felt tears coming down his cheeks. Steve was on the verge of coming but he wasn’t allowed to touch himself. He was desperately and relentlessly massaging Tony’s dick with his mouth and throat while Tony’s hand was sliding down his nape, caressing his back to finish its course on his ass. When three fingers penetrated him, he came a second time. 

 

Tony’s fingers rubbed skillfully inside of him and Steve whimpered on Tony’s cock. It was the first time he was having some else inside. He felt so good, so fulfilled.

 

« Come over to my face, now » had commanded Tony. 

 

Steve overlapped his Alpha. He knelt down on each side of Tony. His balls were almost on Tony’s  nose and his beard tickled him. His mouth felt lonely. 

 

« Get down a little and suck me off more. » 

 

Steve leaned on Tony’s body and took the rod in his mouth again. Tony caressed his asscheeks and licked his balls. Steve felt a wave of pleasure inside, his juice was dripping along his legs and in Tony’s mouth. Tony pushed him down more to get access to his hole. He tried spreading his cheeks apart with his left hand and Steve suddenly felt something wet and soft, so soft, on his rim. _Tony was licking him in that place._ Tony’s tongue was caressing his insides and his beard tingled his asscheeks. Steve felt his all body shiver with pleasure and involuntarily stopped his sucking. He was drowning in pleasure, trembling, whining, sobbing against the burning hard rod in front of him. That was so good that Steve didn’t remember where he was, who he was. He was just exalting. His cock started leaking and leaking his come on Tony. And then the licking stopped. Steve let out an uncontrolled and weeping « Nooo! »

 

« I’m sorry honey, I’m sorry I can’t take you the way you deserve to be taken. You will be, one day, don't worry. In the meantime, I need you to help me. »

 

Tony pushed Steve’s ass up and Steve got up, his legs trembling, insecure. He looked at Tony pained and wanting at the same time. Tony answered his worries with a kind but authoritarian smile. 

 

« Sit on my dick now. I’m gonna wreck your ass. »

 

Steve felt relieved and eager. He wanted this so much. He needed this so much. He was gonna have it. He was gonna have his Alpha inside of him. He squatted above Tony and lowered down until he could feel the monster cock pushing against his hole. Tony’s left hand was holding him on his hip. He stopped unsure if he was allowed. Tony headed his hand to his face and gave him a reassuring caress on the cheek. His eyes were commanding. Steve pushed himself down on the long thick cock and gasped, his eyes wide open. So good. SO GOOD. He was filled. He felt whole. He felt himself again. He started riding slowly the big throbbing cock. It was burning inside of him. His body was on fire. His mind went blank. He couldn’t hold back his moans and whines. Tears were dripping down his cheeks, blurring his vision. He closed his eyes and let himself be controlled by the pleasure. Steve was dripping again. Tony made him accelerate and jolted his cock inside of him to rub against the soft spot. Steve came. He was coming again and again as Tony didn’t let him rest. Steve was crying. He was hurting and loving it at the same time. 

 

Then Tony gripped his hips firmly and held him with both his hands. He started thrusting vigorously inside, jerking his hips with strength. He fucked him like an animal and Steve felt bliss. He wanted him as deep inside as possible. He was sobbing with pain and pleasure. He was possessed. He was controlled. He was dominated completely and he felt content and happy. 

Tony cried out and pushed his dick deep inside. He was coming inside of him. Steve felt so happy. His Alpha had left his semen inside, his smell all over his body. He fell on Tony and snuggled on his left shoulder, trying to catch his breath. The dick still inside of him.

This was the best thing that had ever happened to him. Steve wondered how he could have denied himself this bliss for so long. 

 

« I’m sorry, Captain. I know you want more. I know you need more but I can’t give to you. » Tony whispered gently.

 

Steve looked up to him, confused. 

 

« Knotting » Tony explained. « We can’t do it in this position. » 

 

« I don’t need anything else. It was perfect. » Steve managed to answer,  fully satisfied, and snuggled back on his shoulder. « Thank you. »

 

« I’m sorry to interrupt your post-sex reveries right now, but it hurts like hell. I think I overstrained myself and it’s gotten worse. »

 

Steve jumped off him in panic and saw that Tony was as white as a sheet, sweating like a horse. His eyes fluttering as if he was about to pass out.

 

« Oh Tony, I’m so sorry. »

 

« It’s okay, but we shouldn’t stay here too long. We’re still in a Hydra basement, and surrounded by enemies,  remember? »

 

Steve hadn’t remembered at all. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually planned something a lot more violent (hence, the sexual violence tag) but I was so fed up with mean Tony that I changed my mind. I just couldn't make him an asshole anymore. It is just a soothing parenthesis before a lot more drama...
> 
> NEXT TIME : Tony is more injured that he appeared to be.


	17. Dealing with the aftermath. (and Steve is being stupid.)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony is not feeling well and Steve rescues them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to the people who left kudos and comments. It's nice to feel encouraged. :-)

Tony was hurting a lot and it was obviously hard for him to stay awake. He couldn’t move anymore.    

Steve put his still wet suit on himself and delicately put every piece of the armor back on Tony and wiped the sweat off his face, leaving the faceplate up. He put him on his back as softly and carefully as he could and carried him out of the basement-like room. He walked silently in the corridors looking for the way out. He kept talking to keep Tony from losing consciousness.  When they heard steps, Steve hid in a corner and put Tony down to handle the men. He took them by surprise and incapacitated them. Then, he carried Tony back on and continued his walk. They should leave quickly and he must get Tony to safety.

 

« Don’t leave now. Let’s find some more information about them. » Tony had said groggily, blowing his breath on Steve’s neck.

 

« I can’t do that. This is not a priority. You’re my priority, now. »

 

« Don’t be stupid. This is a good opportunity. Besides, we can’t leave without your shield, can we? »

 

« It’s not safe. I can’t risk your life for a shield or for information. You need to get proper medical assistance. This is just a shield. »

 

« What are you saying? Of course it’s not just a shield. It’s you. Without the shield. You’re just Steve Rogers. Can you handle being only him? Plus, if we find your com, we might get help quicker. »

 

Steve didn't answer the question. He had focused on the second part. Smart move Tony. But it was still very risky, Steve hesitated.

 

« Come on Cap, let’s go find the shield. Put me down if you need to. I can take care of myself. »

 

Steve understood that he would not win this argument so he surrendered before exhausting Tony completely. 

 

« Fine. I am _not_ putting you down, though. »

 

Steve strolled around the labyrinth of corridors  and finally found a room where there were many computers and files. There were three men inside. One was typing on a computer and the two others were trying to get information from an earpiece. _His communicator._

 

 _«_ Tony » Steve whispered « Can you fire at the two men? It’ll make diversion while I take care of the third one. »

 

« No problem Cap. »

 

Steve and Tony executed the plan perfectly and soon the three men were down and Steve had his coms back. He called for the others. They were on their way. Everybody was (almost) fine. SHIELD was sending back-ups and medical assistance. What a relief.

Steve started to look for information about Red Skull’s plans. Tony was seating against a wall, still sweating and about to pass out. 

 

« Ste… Steve… » He whispered painfully.

 

Steve ran to him in panic. 

 

« Look up there. » Tony continued trying to point at something behind him.

 

Steve turned his head to look at it. _His shield_. Steve’s heart jolted in is chest. He was happy to have his shield again and he was even happier that Tony, in the state he was in, was so determined on finding it for him. He felt like he was loved.

 

« Now you can be yourself again. » Tony smiled looking into space. He looked already gone. He must be in so much pain that Steve felt his heart crushing. 

He wiped his forehead again and kept staring in his eyes, looking for a glimpse of consciousness. Tony tenderly caught his wrist with his left hand, the one that he could move.

 

« You smell so good, Captain » he said. 

And Steve suddenly felt hot. He was still in heat. The emergency of the situation had put it on hold but now that they were almost saved, he could feel his body craving for Tony’s touch who was so close to him. 

Tony’s eyes fluttered and his smile faded. He passed out, again. Steve was sick with worry. He hold Iron Man tight, checking constantly his pulse. The rest of the team was just minutes away but they seemed like hours.

 

« Steve? Tony? » Natasha’s voice resonated in the corridors.

 

« The door on your left. » said Steve. 

 

And the team was in the room. They carried Tony to medicals and headed to the Quinjet. The whole team had suffered many blows and injuries. The journey back home was gloomy. Everybody was attending their wounds in silence. Steve was plunged in his thoughts. He was trying to understand everything that had happened. It felt so unreal. It was unexpected, impossible even. He wanted to remember everything, every touch, every noise, every smell. His body was getting hot again.

 

« Steve? » Natasha asked apprehensively. « Are you in heat? » 

 

« What? » Steve looked up in surprise, she was standing in front of him. 

 

« You smell different. » She said, perplexed. 

 

Bruce had looked up to him with an accusatory and worried expression on his face. 

 

« You are in heat, aren’t you? » Natasha said, looking horny. « I can smell it on you. It’s faint though. »

 

« Hum… I … err … Maybe? » Steve was blushing up to his ears.

 

« I thought it was supposed to be tomorrow. How come? » Sam inquired, his eyes lustful.

 

« I can make mistakes, this is not an exact science. Furthermore, a strong rush of adrenaline can provoke heats. It happens. It’s not like I didn’t warn him. » Bruce explained.

 

« You smell different though. You seem changed. » Natasha commented.

 

Clint too was being affected, Steve could see it in his eyes, in his moves. He came closer out of curiosity after Natasha’s remark.

 

« I know what he smells. He smells Alpha. He smells sex. »  He snorted, smirking.

 

Steve became as red as the Iron Man suit he had carried a few hours before. He was looking down trying to hide the stupid smile coming on his tomato face.

 

« Oh my god Steve. This _is_ true. You did it. » Natasha exclaimed. 

 

« Leave the poor guy alone. For god’s sake. » Sam interrupted.

 

« Oh my god. You are so telling me everything later. » Natasha snorted.

 

« Please. Don’t joke about this when we don’t know how Tony is doing. » Steve managed to say with his Captain America voice and everybody turned gloomy again. 

The thing is, despite everything, despite the amazing moment he shared with Tony, despite the exaltation he was in after experiencing such an electrifying and reviving mating, despite his feeling fulfilled and happy and whole, Steve felt extremely guilty.

 

 

…

 

 

« Go to see him » Natasha said.

 

« I’m not sure I can. » Steve answered, looking down to hide his guilty blush.

 

« Of course you can! You’re the one who saved him. »

 

It had been a four days since their mission in the Hydra base and Tony was still in the hospital. He had several broken limbs and his legs were burnt. He had been hurt on his head and suffered from temporary brain damage but he was out of danger. Tony had woken up from coma the day before and Steve had not been to see him yet.

The doctors said it was a miracle he could do what he did. It was probably the power of pheromones, they had said. Steve had had Tony fuck him in a basement full of Hydra men instead of taking him to safety. Steve had risked his life, to satisfy his primary needs. He felt ashamed and extremely guilty.

He had been by his side at the beginning. It felt so right. They had shared something true, something precious. Tony had taken care of him, of his heat. He had taken his virginity. He had taught him how to please an alpha. So it was his turn now, he was supposed to be by his Alpha’s side and take care of him. Steve was worried sick and he could absolutely not be somewhere else. He needed to be with Tony.  And then he remembered.

He woke up from his dreams and there was the morning after, the comeback to reality. When the excitement of his heat dissipated, he realized that there was nothing true, nothing precious, nothing right. It was just hormones. Him and Tony were not friends, not lovers, not mates. Tony hadn’t marked him. He hadn’t knotted him. He hadn’t even kissed him. 

Tony didn’t want Steve. He had rejected him several times. He had refused to be his mate. He could have been his mate seven months ago, and for seven months he hadn’t wanted him.

Steve felt like he had taken advantage of Tony. What if Tony regretted? What if everything Tony had said and done was actually the effect of Steve’s heat. Steve couldn’t go and see Tony now. He couldn’t face it. He couldn’t handle being rejected and look down upon again.

 

« Tony doesn’t want to see me. He probably hates me right now. »

 

« What are you saying? »

 

"This is _my_ fault, Nat. I can’t go there. I can’t see him. It’s just… It’s just inappropriate. »

 

« You’re being stupid. »

 

« You don’t understand, we hate each other, we’ve been hating each other since day 1. We tolerate each other for the sake of the team but that’s all. And now… After everything that happened… I can’t just show up there and pretend that everything’s okay.  »

 

« You’re overthinking it. Just relax. It can’t be that bad. I mean… I know we didn’t really talk about it with everything but… It _was_ Tony, right? »

 

Strangely, indeed, none of his teammates had brought Steve’s defloration up. Everyone was worried for Tony and the topic had probably seemed unsuitable for the time being. Steve was thankful for that. He wasn’t so sure how to handle it himself, especially now, so he had absolutely no desire to discuss it with anybody else. They all suspected it was Tony’s doing but none of them were very sure. Tony hadn’t marked him and in the emergency of the situation, this little event had gone nearly unnoticed.

Steve did not answer Natasha’s question. Instead, he looked down and blushed, just as usual when he was embarrassed. Natasha’s tone softened as she probably felt very sorry for him.

 

« Steve… Why are you like this? Why are you always assuming the worst? You haven’t even talked to him. »

 

« I don’t know. I’m not… I’m not even sure I really want a relationship. I can’t stand the guy. He’s an asshole, he’s a bully. You said so yourself. »

 

« I know I said that but… He’s also a very good friend and teammate, and he takes care of his pack. Don’t be so hard on him. Or is there something you’re not telling me? I mean… He didn’t hurt you did he? »

 

« No, he didn’t. If someone has been hurting someone else, it’s me. I… Everything that happened is my fault, I’m responsible for it. Tony was just… He couldn’t help it I guess. Neither of us could. »

 

« Doesn’t mean he doesn’t like you. You should talk about it with him. You should tell him how you feel. »

 

« I’m not sure I can, right now. I mean, we were really not on good terms before. You don’t even know the half of it… »

 

Natasha looked at Steve with a worried expression.

 

« What are you talking about? There _is_ something you’re not telling me, isn’t there? »

 

« It’s nothing… It’s just… He hasn’t taken really well my intention to change gender. »

 

« I can’t argue with that… »

 

« Well, he… You know how he is right? He’s a bully, he wants to control everything. He wants to control _me_. »

 

« I know very well who he is, yeah, and I know what he’s capable of when he thinks is right. He tends to be a little overprotective with his pack. That’s Tony. We all know he wants to control everything. Just.. I also _know_ that you can be very stubborn when you think _you’re_ right, and that you’re very unlikely to _be_ controlled. »

 

Steve didn’t answer that. He couldn’t say anything in his defense.

 

« Please Steve » She continued, « Stop indulging yourself in self-pity. Tony needs you. He needs you as his captain and he needs you as his friend. You _are_ his friend, if not his _lover_. You’re worried about him, I know you are. Just go and see him. Put everything else on the side for now, just be there for him. Okay? »

 

Natasha left and Steve felt really bad. He couldn’t find the strength to see Tony. 

Tony remained in bed for four days and Steve didn’t go to see him. He preferred to hide in shame and fear of his reaction. He spent those four days in the gym, punching off his frustration and guilt and killing a dozen of punching-bags in the process. When Tony got out of the hospital, he was still injured and was not to go back to being Iron Man soon. He was warmly welcomed by his team though and they had a little celebration. Even Thor was there. It was nice to see everybody so happy, so bonded but Steve had never felt so lonely since he had woken up. Tony didn’t even glance at him. 

 

« You haven’t been to see him. » Natasha said reproachfully. « He asked about you, you know… »

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Right, so... Drama is coming back.
> 
> NEXT TIME : Steve is trying to get close to Tony.
> 
> Do not hesitate to correct me if I make mistakes. Feel free to leave your opinion about the chapter, even if it's negative. It's always nice to have feedbacks.


	18. Going back to square one

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve is trying to seduce Tony.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to the people who left encouraging comments and kudos. That's really nice.
> 
> So I wrote this but it didn't really turned out the way I wanted. I'm actually seeing the limits of my writing skills and of my lack of vocabulary. :(
> 
> Sorry for the lame lame texting. I just can't text in English...

A week and a half had passed and Tony was getting better. He was almost completely healed and was regaining his annoying, always teasing, funny self. Steve had been missing it. A lot. Seeing Tony so depressed, so weak after his accident had made him feel a lot more guilty than he already was. Even if Tony didn’t talk to him and they were on an unspoken agreement to ignore each other’s presence, Steve was happy that Tony had stopped brooding and was being himself again. He guessed that he took it hard no being able to be Iron Man. He would probably be the same if he couldn’t be Captain America. 

Steve wanted to talk. He wanted to end this nonsense. He wanted to be close to Tony, at least as close as the others were to him. He wanted a space in Tony’s heart. Not on the _hate_ side, on the lov— on the _like_ side. He had absolutely no idea how to. He didn’t want to make the first step either, but he felt that he might not really have a choice if he wanted this relationship to progress. He hadn’t been really good at it so far. Not going to see Tony at the hospital had not been his smartest move and certainly hadn’t helped in building something meaningful between the two of them. Steve wanted a fresh start. He wanted something new. He wanted to let go of all their history and meet on new terms. 

There was something different with Steve, now. Something had changed inside of him. He was a changed man. He was a new person and he didn’t know how to deal with these changes. He was trying to accept them the best he could but he was still very confused. He was trying not to think too much about it. It was really hard because right now. It was the only thing in his mind. You see, now… Steve had a _libido_. Steve was horny and he didn’t know what to do with these knew sexual feelings. He was F— horny all the time and couldn’t think of anything else. He wanted to fuck. He wanted to be filled just as he had been, three weeks ago. He wanted to suck cocks. He wanted to be possessed and controlled. He wanted to feel Alpha on his body. He wanted an Alpha to wreck him. He was always _always_ thinking about it. In his bed in the morning, at breakfast, during training, when he was watching TV, in the shower, in his bed at night and, especially, —when _Tony_ was around. 

Tony was the reason of his constant arousal. Alpha Tony, controlling and annoying and reckless and… Steve wanted all of it, all of _him_. He wanted him to do what he had done before. Taking care of his primary needs. He wanted Tony to stain him, to shake his righteous-self off of him, to drag him down in the mud and fuck him, fuck him, fuck him until he could say it out loud. 

Steve had thought of different ways to get to Tony and really, the mature and sensible talk was definitely the best one. The one Steve would have advised anybody to do and would have done with anybody. After all, he was Captain America. He was wise and forgiving and humble. He was the mature one. 

Well, Steve would have done that with anybody else. Other than—Tony. He couldn't face Tony and have a serious conversation. So he thought that maybe, he could resort to something unusual, something quite new for him, something that he was currently starting to notice and acknowledge. Steve was also omega, wasn’t he? So he had attributes that could help him attract Alpha, didn’t he? Steve had made a decision: he was going to _seduce_ Tony into doing what he wanted from him. 

The thing is, Steve had very little experience in seduction. He hadn’t needed to do anything with James as he had practically thrown himself at him and James was about the only interaction he had ever had that was close to seducing. Well, there _had_ been Peggy of course, they had flirted a little, at least Peggy had. But the circumstances were not really adequate and Steve wasn’t sure he could use this as reference, plus it kind of was in a different time. Steve was a bit lost and tried different approaches.

 

 

 **1st Try** : Trying to communicate.

 

Steve needed to subtly make Tony understand he was genuinely interested in pursuing what they had started during his third heat. He thought that he might try to at least make them on talking terms again. When Tony was already up and making coffee as Steve came back all sweaty from his morning run, he thought that it might be a good opportunity to break the ice. He put on his most sincere smile and assumed his Omega charms would do the rest. 

 

« Good Morning, Tony. » Steve had said getting as close as he could reasonably be without being too obvious.

 

Tony turned to him a surprised look on his face and then smirked. 

 

« Are we talking now? » 

 

Okay. That might be a bit harder than he had thought. _Let’s change the subject to something he likes._

 

« So, you do like your coffee in the morning. Can you actually live without it? » Steve continued, ignoring the question and smiling even more.

 

« Really, Cap? » Tony had raised an eyebrow and looked at him scornfully.

 

Steve’s smiled dejected. His confidence faltered.

 

« I was… just trying to make conversation… »

 

« And saying such empty banalities. Please save yourself the effort. Have a good day, Cap. »

 

And Tony was gone to his workshop. _Failed_.

 

 

 **2nd Try** : Getting some help.

 

Steve thought he needed an actual purpose to speak to Tony as, obviously, casual conversation was not going to work. And what better purpose than asking him for help. Tony loved helping others and loved talking about technology. Steve was always helpless with technology. He would ask Tony to help him with his tablet. He had always wanted to know how to print things from his tablet and never could.

Steve put on his most advantageous outfit. He had looked at himself in the mirror a lot before choosing. « You need to show him your attributes » had said Natasha. « Your body is perfect. Just show it more. » Steve had tried on several pieces of clothing but he didn’t want to be too obvious so he decided to go with sportswear, something he would usually wear but a bit tighter this time.

 

« JARVIS?  Where is Tony? »

 

« Mr Stark is having a conversation with Dr Banner in Dr Banner’s laboratory. »

 

« Thanks Jarvis. »

 

It was perfect. Steve had now an excuse to be where Tony was and would ask Tony casually. He went to the lab and listened to their conversation before he dared entering. He didn’t understand a thing. He was just being lulled by Tony’s excited tone that felt like music in his ears.

« So Big Green, I think I’m gonna go, you have a guest. I can smell Omega spying behind the door. » Tony suddenly said.

 

Steve felt a flush all over his face. Tony had purposely spoken louder so he could hear. 

 

« You can come in Cap. » Bruce said, laughing. Steve didn’t move. He heard Tony walk out as he was hiding behind the wall. Tony walked straight on, ignoring Steve whom he had obviously noticed.

 

« Tony wait! » Steve tried.

 

Tony turned to him, wondering. Then he smiled mockingly.

 

« What, gonna ask me about coffee again? » He smirked.

 

« … Mmh… no. I wanted to ask… I need help with the tablet. Do you have a minute? »

 

Tony’s expression got surprised. 

 

« Sure. Okay. Go to Banner and we’ll meet in the living room in 5. »

 

Steve didn’t need to see Bruce. He didn’t want to but he had to now, he supposed. He pretended to have questions about his next heat and quickly went back to the living room where Tony was waiting for him, his heart beating faster.

 

« So what do you want, old man? »

 

« I’d like to know how to print something from the tablet. »

 

Tony rolled his eyes in exasperation and started to explain. Steve didn’t understand shit. Or maybe he would have understood if he had actually paid attention to what Tony was saying. But he was too busy checking him out. He stared at his focused expression. The same passionate glimpse in his eyes every time he spoke about technology. He looked at his lips moving sexily or maybe it was just him wanting Tony to kiss him. He was absorbed by the firm defined body that had pleasured him so much. He was intoxicated with the Alpha addictive smell. 

 

« So did you get it? » Tony asked him, as Steve was in his thought.

 

« Can you _show_ me? » 

 

Steve didn’t get anything and he very much liked the idea of having Tony in his room right now. Tony paused for a second, a confused look on his face. He sighed and finally answered.

 

« Yeah. Sure. »

 

They headed to Steve’s suite not saying a word. Tony showed him everything. There was nothing ambiguous in his actions. He was keeping his distance. Steve wanted to get physically closer but got cold feet and couldn’t make a move. When Tony was finished, Steve thought he had to do something before he was gone. He lay languorously on his bed, resting on his elbows and spread his legs slightly, as if expecting something. 

 

« Thanks Tony. I don’t know what I would do without you. » Steve smiled lewdly.

 

Tony looked at him suspiciously and laughed. 

 

« Yeah. Captain. Now you’ve got what you needed. ‘m gonna go. See you. »

 

And he was gone. _Failed_.  How lame. Steve had humiliated himself and hadn’t made any progress.

 

 

 **Try 3** : Movie night

 

Steve needed help. He wondered if it was judicious to ask the others but then he was kind of desperate so why not.

 

« You need to change your clothes. Get more modern. Tony likes dressing up. He’s always elegant. You’re sure to score if you make an effort on this aspect. » Natasha had said. « And then you need to get close to him. Get into his personal space. Touch him and let the scent do the rest.

Be suggestive without being vulgar. »

 

« Speak dirty with him. There is nothing more arousing than a kinky Omega who knows what they want. » Clint had said. « You should try sexting. I’m sure Stark would love that. »

 

« Sexting? » Steve inquired.

 

« Don’t listen to him. » Natasha interrupted. « He’s gross. »

 

« I’m not. » Clint protested. « Seriously. Let him know what you clearly want. You are already irresistible. Just let him know that you’re okay being courted. Be flirtatious, provoking.

 

« I’m trying but… it feels awkward. » Steve pouted.

 

« This is all bullshit. You don’t need to do anything. Just be yourself. Don’t try to be something you’re not.  You need to tell him how you feel and stay the way you are. You’re perfect the way you are. » Bruce declared. 

 

« He’s right. You’re gorgeous. » Natasha agreed.

 

« Yeah. Really hot. Like Really really hot. »

 

« Not helping. » Steve sighed. 

 

So Steve had tried to change his clothes. He was waiting for movie night. Natasha had insisted that Tony stayed because recently he had been having a tendency to flee any team bonding activity in order to avoid Steve as much as he could and clearly, that was beginning to be bothersome for the whole pack. 

Tony stayed. Steve felt like a teenager, all excited and shy at the same time. 

Everybody complimented him on his tight-fitting jeans and suggestive black T-shirt that showed off his firm chest and chiseled abs. Tony didn’t. He joked about it though. « Welcome to 21st century, Cap. » He hadn’t even flirted a little. _Failed_.

Clint had chosen a chick flick. They were trying to help. Steve had been able to sit next to Tony and he didn’t change his seat. Steve surreptitiously came closer to Tony. His thighs brushed against his and he started rubbing his knee, as naturally as he could. 

There was a sex scene in the movie. The omega was descending under the sheets. Steve remembered what he had done to Tony and started to blush. Tony put his hand on Steve’s eyes. « Clint! Do not corrupt the innocent eyes of our boy scout captain here. » Tony said and Steve was smiling widely. He fondly took Tony’s hand and brushed it down his face. 

« Please I can handle a little blow-job scene. » He said jokingly.

« Oooh kinky! Cap is getting depraved. » Clint teased.

« I can talk dirty, can’t I? I am not that innocent. » Steve replied.

« Yeah Cap! Be bold. » Natasha encouraged. 

« Seriously. It’s just sucking a cock. Not a big deal. Plus we’re not seeing anything. » 

Steve had turned to Tony and smiled suggestively in connivance. 

« Those words are so ugly in your mouth, Captain. » Tony answered and turned away from him. _Failed._ Steve pouted and went back to the movie, trying to ignore the weigh of disappointment in his chest.

There was still time and Tony was still very close to him. Steve decided to change tactics. He began to lean on Tony’s shoulder. And Tony didn’t push him off. That was improvement. He kept brushing his knee against Tony’s and intensified his touch. Tony seemed to enjoy it, at least, he didn’t mind. He was getting used to the touch. Steve tried to push his luck and almost rested his head on Tony’s shoulder. He looked at him. He was still concentrated on the movie. Steve put innocently his hand on Tony’s thigh. Tony tensed.

« Hey, I’m gonna take ice cream. I’m in the mood for ice-cream. Who wants ice-cream? » 

And Tony escaped quickly to the kitchen to get ice-cream. He came back but did not sit next to Steve. _Failed_. _Failed_. _Failed_.

 

Steve had lost confidence and decided to follow Bruce’s advice. Being himself. (okay, he had decided to follow half of Bruce’s advice and skip the telling him how you feel part) 

He, Steve Rogers, was currently out of his time and a bit disconnected with this century. It wouldn’t be weird for him to ask his teammates about something he didn’t know. They were used to his lack of cultural and social knowledge. He thought that he could innocently ask this and that because of who he was, it wouldn’t be awkward. 

 « So… » Steve asked at the end of the movie. « What exactly is ‘sexting’? » 

Clint burst out of laughter. Natasha smiled kindly. Bruce tried to sigh in exasperation but he looked amused. And Tony… Tony looked chocked.

« Oh Captain. That was epic. » Clint said, still laughing.

Steve looked at them worriedly, maybe he had been a bit too far. 

« So I’m gonna teach you a thing or two about life in the 21st century » Natasha said and took him by the arm and they walked to their rooms. _Failed_. Well, at least, now he knew what ‘sexting’ meant.

 

 **Try 4** : Sexting

 

Steve’s last attempt to get into Tony’s pants had been a disaster. Seducing, flirting was definitely _not_ his best skill. Steve felt a bit depressed but he was not defeated. He was too stubborn to stop middle way.

He got up early that day and went down to the gym to take out his frustration on one (or several) punching bags. After two hours of not thinking about anything but the bag, Steve dropped on the floor and lay there for a few minutes. He was all sweaty and he felt refreshed after his body had stopped all efforts. The cold made him tense and shiver. His shirt was sticking to his skin and brushing his sensitive nipples. He was thinking about Tony. He felt hot again and desire rose up inside of him. He wanted him. Now. He slid his hand down and touched the bump in his shorts, spreading his legs instinctively. He needed to get him here.

He took his phone and typed a text: ‘Where are you?’ and sent it to Tony.

The reply was instantaneous. ‘What do you want?’

STEVE: ‘Get your sexy Iron ass down to the gym.’

(Steve had taken a huge risk with using the work 'sexy' but he thought that he had to take risks at some point if he wanted to get what he wanted. He was glad texting did not demand to see the other person's reaction. It found it a lot easier.)

TONY: ‘Are you gonna spank me? What have I done?’

STEVE: ‘For training, dummy.’

TONY: ‘Be down there in 5.’

STEVE ‘You want me to spank you?’

TONY: ‘Oh yeah. You better suit up.’

STEVE: ‘I’m already down there. Do you really want the suit?’

TONY: ‘What’s a Captain America Spank without the suit?’

STEVE: ‘OK. Give me a min.’

TONY: ‘Get it on babe.’

 

Steve heart was beating so fast he felt dizzy. His first attempt at sexting was very chaste but it hadn’t been fruitless. Steve and Tony had talked (via text messages but still talked) like they would have before all of this happened. Steve was excited at his new progress. He quickly got up to change into Captain America. He was gonna kick Iron Man’s ass.

When he came down again, Iron man was waiting for him, his arms crossed. 

« There he is. You’re being audacious today, Captain. Where are the others? »

« It’s just you and me today. » 

« Really? So are you ready for that spank? »

« Damn yeah. » Steve was smiling with confidence. The gym was his element. He didn’t have to pretend. He could be himself.

They started sparring and the blow were getting more and more violent. Nobody was winning at first, and then Steve got distracted. He was thinking about his bold moves earlier and couldn’t hold back a proud smile at his success. Iron Man took the opportunity to make him fall and pin him down. He was holding Steve firmly down and, to be honest, Steve could have pushed him away but it was the last thing he wanted to do right now. Steve breathed heavily and looked at the faceplate, mouth open. Tony took off Steve’s helmet and his own and looked at Steve intensely. Steve was extremely hot and flushed in arousal. Tony smiled.  « So Captain, Who is it that’s gonna get his sexy ass spanked? » Then he stood up, put his helmet back on and left, chuckling. Steve was left on the floor, legs spread and mouth wanting, with a hard on. _Failed_.

 

 **Try 5** : A man’s heart is through his stomach.

 

Steve was desperate. He had called Pepper. « Tony likes being taken care of. » She had said. « Bring him food and coffee, especially coffee, when he’s in his workshop. Make sure he gets proper care. You need to talk to him, Captain Rogers. He will accept you eventually. You would be good together. You would be good for him.» 

So Steve was giving himself a last chance.

Tony had been in his workshop since morning. Steve took this as a good opportunity. He was a good cook. He would cook Tony something, not as healthy as he would want it to be but to Tony’s tastes. That was what was important. It was about 5 p.m when he went down the workshop with a cheeseburger, a donut and coffee. 

 

« Jarvis? Could you let me in? »

 

« Mr Stark is currently working and do not wish to be disturbed right now. »

 

« Can you tell him I have food. »

 

The door opened. 

 

« Captain… What do you want? » Tony started, his eyes focused on his work. 

 

Steve had a feeling of deja vu. He was staring at Tony’s back and feeling his strong alpha presence. He wanted to submit. He wanted to be at his feet. He wasn’t in heat but he wanted him more than anything.

 

« I made you a burger. » Steve tried to bait.

 

« Yeah. So I’ve heard. What do you want? » Tony insisted still focused on his work, he was seated on a tall rolling stool.

 

« Just make sure you get actual food in your body. » Steve half-lied.

 

Tony was still focused on his task and was not looking at him.

 

"Tell me what you want Captain. Do you really think I didn’t notice your pathetic attempts to seduce me the last few days? What do you want Captain? »

 

This was not a good start but Steve didn’t want to give up. He was too stubborn.

 

« I made coffee..? » 

 

« Okay. »

 

Tony turned to him. Steve brought him the tray and put it on the table next to him. Then he did what he had been wanting to do ever since he came in. He knew it was stupid and lame and humiliating but he did it anyway. He knelt down at his alpha’s feet, put his hands behind his back and looked down in total submission. Tony cupped his chin up in his hand and made him look at him. He stared at him with his powerful alpha eyes. His voice went low and sensual and it turned Steve on.

 

« What do you want Captain? »

 

Steve escaped his powerful gaze and looked at the crotch an inch away from his nose. _Tony was hard_. Steve couldn’t move anymore. He was as hard as a rock and trembling all over. His ass was getting wet. He brought his head on Tony’s hard rod and inhaled a deep breath of Tony’s scent. Tony’s hands came to his head and stroked him gently.

 

« Tony… » He sighed.

 

« What do you want, Captain? » Tony’s voice was soft and affectionate now. 

 

« Call me Steve. »

 

« What do you want, Steve? » He repeated.

 

« You » Steve had finally managed to answer, his nose still buried in Tony’s crotch. « I want you. »

 

« Okay. Are you sure this is what you want? I’m an asshole, remember? You hate me, remember? » Tony asked.

 

« Please Tony. I want you. » Steve was still looking away.

 

« What do you want from me? Do you want me to fuck you? » Tony cupped his chin again and made him look at him.

 

« Yes. Yes Tony, please fuck me. » Steve was looking right in Tony’s eyes. They were shining with desire. Tony chuckled.

 

« Sooo, _this_ is what you want, huh? You want me to take care of your _needs._ You’re making it really hard for me to resist you Captain, you know that. You’re so beautiful. You are amazing you know that? My defenses are falling. Do not regret it later…. »

 

« I won’t… »

 

« Okay, Open your mouth. »

 

Steve executed. 

 

« Get me off. And if you satisfy me enough. I’ll give you what you want. » Tony continued.

 

Steve started to bite on the big lump with his whole mouth until Tony’s underwear were soaked in saliva. Tony took out his huge hard rod and put it inside. Steve sucked on it for a bit and then took it out to lick it. His tongue was making circles around the glans while his hands were sliding up Tony’s legs and caressed slightly his thighs. As they were going up, Steve’s desire grew inside of him. His mouth swallowed the cock entirely. He wanted to eat him up. He gripped Tony’s asscheek and swallowed the cock vigorously. Tony groaned and seized his head with both his hands. He pressed hard inside and tapped down his throat. Tony was holding him firmly and fucked his mouth brutally. Steve moaned in pain and pleasure. He couldn’t catch his breath. His cock was dripping in his pants and his ass was wet. 

 

« Your mouth is amazing, babe. You’re amazing. Please don’t change. » Tony groaned. « It feels good, Steve. Feels so good. I’m gonna come now. »

 

Steve’s cock jolted as he was expecting the flow of come in his mouth. Tony groaned a last time and he pulled back a little to fill Steve’s mouth and give him a taste. Steve took everything on his tongue and savored every drop of it. It was bitter and salty. It was Tony. He wanted it. Tony patted his head a little.

 

« Good. Good boy. You were perfect. » 

 

Steve was content. He had been good. He had pleased his alpha. He was going to get his reward. Tony let go of Steve’s head and put his pants back on. He went for the coffee and food,  took a sip and started eating. Steve was still kneeling down, a bit disappointed. 

 

« I’m busy right now. Go to your room and think this through. I will take care of your needs if this is really what you want, but it’s gonna be on my terms. _I_ decide _when_ , _where_ and _how_. If you’re sure, I want you naked and kneeling down in front the entrance door of my suite at 8 p.m, waiting for me. Jarvis will let you in. »

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading. :-) 
> 
> This chapter is the reason I had them not talking in the previous one. I wanted to see some Steve's pining and awkward seduction and some domestic avengers as well. I wanted to write something funny. I really think I failed on all aspects. SORRY :( 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed it anyway.
> 
> If you have any ideas or suggestions to make it better, I'll take it. (especially the dialogues that I found really lame)
> 
> NEXT TIME : Steve has been thinking about it and has made his decision.


	19. Relationships are complicated.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve has made his decision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> smut all along. (slightly, very slightly flirting with sub/dom) 
> 
> If you don't like it, read the last 10 lines and the dialogues for the continuation of the story.
> 
> Thanks to the people who left kudos and comments. :-) It's nice.

Steve didn’t know what he wanted exactly. He wanted to have sex, that he knew. He wanted to have sex with Tony. He knew as much, but regarding his relationship with Tony, he hadn’t thought about it, not really. Now, he had what he wanted. He was going to have sex with Tony, on a regular basis. Thinking about it now, he wasn’t so sure that it was what he wanted. No, he knew. He knew that it wasn’t what he wanted. He wanted more. He thought about it for the rest of the evening. Could he be satisfied with what Tony was giving? Probably not. Would he be happy in this relationship? Probably not. Would that be enough? Probably not. He thought about it for a while but it didn’t really matter. Steve had already made his decision. He had known the second his mouth was filled with Tony’s cum. He knew he couldn't live without this anymore. He knew he would accept anything and everything from Tony. 

 

At 7:30, Steve took a shower thoroughly and put on a T-shirt and shorts and headed to Tony’s. He would undress there. Surely Tony didn’t mean for him to walk naked in the Tower.

At 7:50 he was in front of the door and he paused for a second. Did he mean inside? or outside? He wouldn’t have him wait for him outside, would he? 

« Jarvis? »

« Captain Rogers. »

« I think I am expected? »

« Of course, Captain. Mr Stark will be here in a few minutes. It has given me, hum, specific instructions… regarding your waiting. » The artificial voice was hesitating. Steve could even hear the AI’s judgmental tone. It made him blush to his ears.

« I’m supposed to wait inside, right? »

« Yes, Sir. »

Steve sighed in relief. Even if he would have done it, he would rather not. The door opened and Steve came in. It was the first time he was visiting Tony’s suite. It was so luxurious. If he had ever thought that his own room was too luxurious, it was nothing in comparison. He was a bit curious and thought about exploring a little but the desire to obey his Alpha was stronger. He took off his rags and meticulously folded them and put them in a corner so that it wouldn’t look out of place in the middle of all this luxury. Steve came in front of the door, not too close, and knelt down, hands behind his back and naked. He was already hard.

At 8 o’clock, the door opened and Steve could see Tony’s feet in front of him. He heard him chuckle. 

« Wow. What a view. So, I’m taking that you’ve made your decision? »

« Yes. »

« Are you really, sure? You can still back down now. »

« I’m sure. »

« Good. »

Tony cocked his hand to Steve’s head and brushed his fingers in his hair. 

« Look at me, Steve. »

Steve raised his eyes and looked at his alpha. He felt so happy right now, he was right where he belonged, with his alpha. He felt safe and content, so happy that it made him smile. A true smile. Tony smiled back. He caressed his cheek down and fondled his lips with his thumb. He slipped it in. Steve felt so hot and so hard. His body was burning with desire. Tony was hard too and Steve wanted it in his mouth again. He sucked hard on Tony’s thumb and pushed his head closer to make Tony understand. Tony understood. 

« Tsk. you’re too greedy Captain. Be patient. » He teased.

And Tony took his thumb out of his mouth.

« Get up. » He ordered. 

Steve got up, a bit surprised at first, and then relieved. He was so excited that he hadn’t realized that his knees hurt. He was standing naked in front of a fully clothed Tony. He was taller than him and he didn’t want to be. He wanted to look up to Tony. Steve felt embarrassed and uncomfortable. He looked down and hid his erection behind his hands. He was ashamed of his body suddenly, as if being naked in front of Tony right now had sent him back to his young days when he was sick and puny, as if his body was not desirable. 

« Don’t hide it. Don’t be ashamed. You’re gorgeous. » Tony raised his chin up with fondling fingers.« You’re magnificent. »

Steve unveiled his erection and smiled proudly. Tony took the rod in his hand and pressed gently. Steve gasped and closed his eyes as it sent a wave of pleasure and desire in his body. He was so turned on that his body shivered entirely. 

Tony let go of his cock and his hands moved all over his body, fondling every details of his anatomy, curling around every bumps and hollows until they reached his neck. Tony took his head firmly into his hands and gazed deeply in his eyes. 

« Let’s take this to the bedroom, shall we? »

Steve wanted to say ‘yes’ but he was too impressed, he just managed to nod and let Tony lead him to the bedroom. Tony pulled him by the arm and dragged him to an expensive modern bedroom and released his hand when they were in. Steve stopped to admire the extravagance of the decoration and stood there for a minute. It was a minute too long for Tony who slapped his asscheek to push him forward. Steve moaned in surprise and felt a wave of excitement at the touch. His cock jolted and he craved for more. Steve bumped against the huge bed and hesitated a moment before bending over it, shaking his wet ass to Tony. Tony came behind it and rubbed the hard lump in his pants against his entrance. He gripped both his cheeks and stroked them greedily as his hips were rocking forward. Steve’s arms and legs got weak. He climbed on the bed and settled himself on all four. Then he dropped his upper body on the mattress, raising his ass even more closer to Tony and rubbing it against the big hard lump. 

« You want it, don’t you? »

« Yes. »

« Not convincing. »

« Yes, Tony. Please. I want it. » 

« That’s better but you could do even more. »

« Please Tony. Give it to me now. I want it. I want it inside of me. »

« Yeah. That’s it. Beg for it. »

Steve wanted to be filled again. He wanted to feel the intense pleasure and sensation of wholeness he had felt with Tony inside of him. He wanted it deep and rough but Tony moved backward and released his grip. Steve felt the cold air on his wet ass. Tony stared at him. 

« Look at yourself. So submissive. So willing. Giving yourself to me. You’re so beautiful. I wanna wreck you. I wanna eat you up. »

Tony admired Steve for minute before his hand hit his ass.

« I remembered you deserve a spanking. »

Steve should have been offended but he wasn’t, on the contrary it turned him on. Tony started to spank him, not enough to hurt him (not that it would anyway) but hard enough to make him shiver all over as if he was sent electric shock through his whole body. Steve’s cock jolted and leaked. Steve felt bliss again. He wanted to be Tony’s. He wanted Tony to control him. He wanted to forget everything else. He wanted it to be just Tony and him. He loved it when he used him like that. Tony’s spanks were turning into caresses. He was soothing the skin and his thumb brushed over Steve’s hole. 

« You’re already so wet and you’re not even in heat. What a shameless body you have. You are so indecent… So gorgeous. »

Everyday Steve would have been embarrassed, offended even, but horny Steve felt proud and flattered and each compliment Tony was warmly giving him went straight to his heart. Tony circled around his entrance with his skillful fingers and his other hand went down his balls and his cock and seized it firmly. He started stroking gently while teasing his hole. Steve was trembling all over and couldn’t hold back lewd moans. Tony’s fingers rubbed the tip of Steve’s cock and spread the precum all over. He was pressing it in an irregular rhythm which surprised Steve every time. His heart was beating fast and his body burning. He couldn’t take it anymore. He wanted something inside him now. He wanted it so much he was rubbing his ass and pushing it back to get more of Tony’s touch. He was moaning with pain and desire.

« Don’t be so impatient Captain. We’ve got all night. »

Tony released his grip on Steve and pushed him on the side. Then he placed him on his back, his head on the pillows, his legs semi folded and spread. Steve could watch Tony now. He could admire the powerful aura of his Alpha. He was smaller and slanderer than him but he could manhandle him like he was a doll and Steve had loved it. He loved being handled like he was Tony’s most precious possession. Tony stepped closer and set his hand on Steve’s thigh and slithered it down. He groped his balls and played with them as Steve was lasciviously looking at him, spreading his legs more to grant him access. Tony wiped his wet ass and lubricated his cock and balls with it until they were all sticky and shiny with slick. His cock was burning and throbbing in Tony’s hand. Then his hand slid down and two fingered penetrated him, while his thumb was still caressing his balls. Steve gasped and tensed in pleasure. The fingers stretched his already loose ass and crept deeper inside Steve, rubbing against his prostate. His body tensed and jerked in pleasure while Steve was moaning. Tony put his other hand on his torso to appease him and fondled his chest sensually, insisting on his oversensitive and hard nipples. Steve wasn’t looking anymore, he was just losing himself in pleasure. When Steve was on the verge of coming, Tony removed his fingers and slipped them into Steve’s open mouth, wiping them on his lewd tongue. « Get a taste of your own juice. » Tony said with a deep low voice. Steve opened his eyes and looked at him. Tony was staring at him with dark lecherous eyes, his pupils dilated with desire. Steve had never seen so much desire in someone else’s eyes. It destabilized him even more. It attracted him even more. It drove him crazy. Steve sucked on the fingers as if his life depended on it. Only for a few second because Tony quickly removed his fingers and pushed him back on the pillows. He was still staring, all alpha as he was, and started to strip slowly. He unbuttoned his shirt, button after button. Steve felt his Alpha aura surround him. He felt small and fragile. He felt like a lamb trapped by a ferocious  hungry wolf. He was scared and, at the same time, he wanted it more than anything. He started to stroke his own cock, enticed by the wonderful view. 

« Don’t touch yourself. You’re never allowed to touch your cock when you’re with me, Captain. »

Steve dropped everything as he had been threatened with a gun. He felt so small. He was seeing Tony naked for the first time. He couldn’t look away. Deeply impressed, and fascinated by the glowing arc reactor. Tony had taken off his pants and was sliding his expensive underwear down his huge cock. The monster jerked and unfurled as Tony freed it from its prison of fabric. Steve spread his legs wider and tensed his hips up as a wave of juice flowed down his ass. 

« Yeah. That’s it, babe. Spread it wide for me. Do you want it? »

« Yes. Please. Tony. Please. Give it to me now. I want it. »

« How do you want it? »

Steve hesitated a second and then let it out. « I want it hard and deep. I want everything. I want you to fill me up. I want you to break me. » He was scared he had said too much but Tony didn’t seem bothered.

« Good. Good boy. You’re so perfect. I’m gonna give it to you now. I’m gonna give it to you hard. »

Tony settled between Steve’s legs and pinned him down, both his hands holding his shoulders still. He rubbed his cock against Steve’s and massaged them, sending waves of pleasure through Steve’s body and making him sob. Then, he slid it down his entrance and rubbed more. His eyes were still locked into Steve’s. Steve was already exhausted. He couldn’t take any more teasing. He was burning and sweating and weeping. The cock penetrated him slowly as if Tony was scared to hurt him, but Steve was wet and loose. The tip was touching his prostate and Steve was sobbing with pleasure, almost in trance. Then Tony thrusted hard deep inside Steve who gasped and jerked, his eyes opened. Tony was completely inside. Tony bent down and rested his elbows on Steve’s chest to hold him still and waited till his ass was used to the invasion. Steve was not as loose as he thought he was. He was not in heat. It was probably another thing Tony knew about him and he didn’t. When he was ready Tony stretched his arms again and hold Steve down, his hands locked on his shoulders. He started pushing hard inside, giving long and brutal thrusts. He invaded Steve forcefully, overwhelming him completely. He fucked hard and rough and brutal and Steve loved it. He was in trance. He was so far gone he could only feel the powerful and paralyzing thrusts and the pleasure invading him. He was almost screaming now, his mind blank, his eyes seeing stars. He came. He kept coming and coming as Tony accelerated. He couldn’t take it anymore. It was too much but Tony didn’t stop. He thrusted and thrusted and hurt and inflamed his inside. Steve squeezed hard. He wanted to please him more than anything in the world. He wanted to be his omega. Tony came in a groan. He spurted once and twice and three times and four times and five times. He filled Steve with his come and Steve’s heart was filled too. He wanted it in the depth of his body, of his soul. Tony emptied himself and turned around to lie down at his side. Both of them were exhausted, breathing heavily and sweaty all over. They stayed silently like this for a few minutes, catching their breath. Then Steve turned to Tony and put his hand on his chest, rubbing his fingers in his chest hairs, brushing against the glowing arc reactor. He was smiling widely, happier than he had ever been. 

« Thank you. Alpha. It was amazing. » 

« Good. Let me get some rest now. » 

Tony pushed Steve’s hand away. 

« I’ll tell you when we do this again. Tomorrow we discuss how this is gonna work. You can leave now. » Tony said it as coldly as he could and closed his eyes to sleep. Steve’s heart squeezed in disappointment and he felt a lump in his throat. He wanted to stay. He wanted to sleep in the safe atmosphere surrounding his alpha’s bed. He wanted to be in his warmth. He wanted to touch him. ‘Can I stay?’ he wanted to say but instead he let out a choked « Can I take a shower at least? »

« You have a shower in your room. » was the answer. « Goodnight Captain. »

Steve left the room with tears in his eyes and a wide smile on his face. He was fulfilled. His body and mind were satisfied. He had had everything he had wanted and yet, his heart felt so empty. Steve had known. He knew that he didn’t want this. He knew that it would hurt but he also knew that he couldn’t stop. He knew that next time Tony would ask for him he would go. He would go because he craved for it more than anything else. He was already addicted. Steve knew that he shouldn’t let himself sink into this dangerous addiction, but he also knew that he would, no matter what.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the mistakes. Didn't have the courage to read again.
> 
>  
> 
> NEXT TIME : Steve and Tony discuss their relationship and have more sex.


	20. Sinking into addiction

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve and Tony discuss their relationship and have sex again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Basically, just smut.

Steve went to sleep thinking about Tony and woke up thinking about Tony. He wished he had woken up in the silk sheets of Tony’s king size bed but he was alone, in his own bed and hard. Today they were going to discuss this. Steve couldn’t wait. He couldn’t think of anything else. He wanted to go to run but he was scared that Tony would ask for him while he was away and that he’d miss a chance to see him. He considered staying here waiting for Tony to call for him and then he came to his senses. He was not to live his life according to Tony’s good will. He was his own person and he shouldn’t ever think like that. So, he went running and came back earlier than usual, you never know. Tony didn’t call for him. He came down for breakfast with a stupid grin on his face. The same satisfied smile he had yesterday when he was out of Tony’s room.

Bruce was the only one in the kitchen, he was drinking his tea and reading the newspaper. Steve prepared his breakfast without thinking. He was still reminiscing the night before.

 « Somebody had a great time apparently. » 

Steve was so absorbed in his memories that he didn’t realize that his friend was talking to him. He didn’t answer and then he noticed Bruce’s expecting face.

« Sorry, what did you say? » He asked.

Bruce laughed and repeated « I said that you had a great time apparently. » 

Steve smiled again and blushed to his ears. That was enough of an answer. 

« So I guess things with Tony got better. »

« Yeah, I guess. » Steve was still smiling stupidly.

« Are you two a thing now? » Bruce asked skeptically. 

« Err… Maybe… I don’t know… »

« Would you like to be? »

« I don’t know. I’m not sure. Yeah. Maybe. »

« I thought you didn’t want a mate. »

« I don’t. »

« Okay. So is it just casual? »

« I guess. »

There was a pause. Steve tried to hide his hurt feelings but Bruce was always so perceptive. He studied Steve a moment and then he continued.

« You don’t seem too happy about it. Do you want more? »

« I don’t know. maybe. »

« Have you told him? »

« No. »

« Why not? »

« I don’t know… »

« Tell him. »

Steve didn’t answer. He wasn’t sure he would be able to tell Tony. He wasn’t even sure himself of what he wanted. What was he going to tell Tony? He didn’t know what he expected of this thing. He was planning to let it go and take things as they came. He would think it over when he has to, but for now, he would take what is given and enjoy it as much as he could. 

Tony didn’t call for him. After a cold shower to get his head straight, he put on sportswear clothes. He had wanted to jerk off in the shower but he remembered Tony had forbidden him to touch his dick while he was with him. He wasn’t with him but somehow there was something that was stopping him from doing it, as if he had something to prove to Tony. He wanted to be a good omega and show Tony how obedient he was, prove him that he was a good omega and he could keep him, mark him and make him his mate. That was stupid, Tony would never know, but it made Steve happy and content to be so obedient and so good to his alpha. 

Tony was still remaining silent so he decided to go down to the gym for training. He went there and met Clint and Natasha who were sparring. He was still smiling stupidly. Knowing that he had purposely not jacked off in the shower had made him light headed and content. They looked at him suspiciously. 

« Cap? You’re okay? » Natasha inquired, a bit worried. 

« Yeah… Why? »

« Well you kinda look a bit out of it today.

« I’m fine. »

« I see. Did something good happen last night? »

« Maybe. »

Clint’s eyes illuminated.  « You finally got into Stark’s pants. Well done, Cap! »

« No… It’s nothing like that. »

 

 

Clint and Natasha left the gym and Steve took the opportunity to hit some punch bags. He could do with a little bit of action right now to sweat off all the pent-up frustration that this morning had led to. He exhausted himself on the bags for more than 2 hours. He was already past lunch time when he was done. He was a bit hungry but decided to go take a shower first and pushed the button to his suite. The elevator opened and he went out to an unfamiliar lobby. It was Tony’s level. Did he press the wrong button unconsciously?

« Jarvis, I want to go to my room. »

« I’m sorry Mr Rogers, but Mr Stark instructed me to bring you to his apartment. He is expecting you. »

Steve’s heart skipped. Tony had called for him. He was not ready. He was all sweaty and dirty. He couldn’t go and see Tony in this state. 

« I need to take a shower first. »

« Mr Stark insisted that you come directly after your training session, sir. »

« Err… Okay. » 

Steve headed to the door and it opened. He came inside and his eyes searched for Tony. 

« Captain? »

Steve turned his head to the voice and saw Tony, a glass of Brandy in his hand. Steve stood still in front of him without saying anything. He was checking him out. Tony was smiling. 

« Do you wanna drink? » he asked.

« Err.. No. I can’t get drunk anyway. » 

« That’s true. I had forgotten. What a shame. » Tony was still smiling.

« I’m hungry though. » Steve tried, because he was starving.

« Yeah. you’re gonna eat. But not now. You can come in by the way. » Tony smirked.

« Err… okay.. yeah. sorry. I.. » Steve 

Steve was too impressed and didn’t dare enter the room. He felt too dirty to deserve to be in all this luxury.

« Maybe… Maybe I could take a shower? »

« No. You’re good like this. You smell so good. This is perfect. I want to get high with your scent. »

Steve felt a wave of warmth invade his body. He loved how Tony complimented him. He wanted to run at his feet and kneel down in front of him so he could pat him on the head and congratulate him for being good.

« Come here. » Tony ordered.

And Steve came to Tony and stood in front of him. He was breathing heavily. He looked in his eyes and felt overwhelmed by his power. He kelt down to him and rest his head on Tony’s groin. Tony laughed and gently pushed his head away, brushing his hair.

« You’re really extreme, you know that? I never met an omega as submissive and obedient as you are. You’re from another time. It is unsettling. »

Steve was puzzled at his revelation. He had never imagined that his behavior was out of place. He felt embarrassed suddenly.

« I’m sorry » he stammered, his face going red.

« Don’t be. It’s really cute. But you don’t _have to_ do it. Just so you know. »

« Okay. »

« You can stand up if you want, unless you prefer staying like this? »

« I don’t mind. » 

« We need to discuss this. »

« Yeah. » 

They should discuss it. Steve agreed with Tony. It was important to discuss it. They needed to know where they were standing. Steve needed to know. But talking was the last thing Steve wanted to do right now. He was so turned on, so befuddled by Alpha. 

« You’re not disposed to discuss right now, are you? »

Steve turned his head from right to left and smiled stupidly.

« Stand up and come with me. »

Tony took Steve to the bathroom and the huge shower. 

« Strip and go inside. Put you hands against the wall and bend down a little. Spread your legs. »

Tony’s commanding voice was so infuriating. Steve felt so hot and so wanting. He was starting to get wet. He was so hard it hurt and wanted to touch himself but obeyed his alpha’s orders. 

Tony undressed and came behind him. He took his hips roughly and Steve could feel the tip of his hard cock brushing against his ass. His breathing intensified and his heart started to beat really fast. Tony was holding him firmly. He put his dick on Steve’s hole and thrusted all of a sudden. He pushed all the way in at one go. Steve groaned with pain. Even if he was wet already, he didn’t expect this. Tony waited for a few seconds until he got used to it.

« You’re already so wet and so open. You were made for this. » Tony muttered with a deep voice. 

Steve was opening himself and a wave of juice flowed down as Tony’s cock jolted inside of him and brushed his prostate. Steve was hurting. His inside were burning but he wanted more. He wanted Tony to bang him. He pushed his ass backward and moaned in frustration. 

« You are so eager. » Tony said and thrusted brutally squeezing his hips hurtfully. Steve’s cock started dripping as the violent invasion got harder and faster. Steve was taller, stronger and heavier and despite that his body vacillated at each powerful bang, his hands slipped on the wet tiles of the shower and couldn’t hold him still. 

Tony pounded and pounded violently until he relieved himself inside in a long groan. Steve felt the come spurting inside and his cock jolted. Tony was still hard inside of him and Steve felt desired and loved and it send shivers down his spine. Tony remained like this for a moment and Steve was on the verge of coming but couldn’t. He wanted to touch himself but he wasn't allowed. He started whining in frustration. 

« Shhh. Get down babe. Get down. Get on your knees. » Tony commanded.

Steve and Tony bent their legs and came down on their knees in a perfectly synchronized move, Tony still hard inside of Steve.

« That’s it babe, good boy. Get down. » Tony pushed Steve’s back down and hold him still on the floor, his face against the tiles. Then he started talking. Steve wanted to come but he got a talk instead. His whole body was hot and tense with desire.

« So, is this what you want? You want to be fucked like this? » Tony asked

« Yes. » Steve panted.

« What do you want? What are you expecting from this? »

« I thought it was going to be on your terms. »

« It is, but that doesn’t mean I can’t take your feelings into consideration. Tell me what you want. »

« I want to be your mate. »

« I see. Of course you do. I thought you didn’t have time for mates, that you didn’t wanna date. »

« I don’t but I need you. I _need_ to be yours. »

« You _need_ me? You want me to protect you? »

« Yes. » 

« You want me to take care of you? »

« Yes. »

« Do you want me to fuck you and knot you? »

« Yes. »

« Is that everything you want from me?  Don’t you want more? »

« Yes. No. I mean, Yes. »

« I don’t do mates, you know that? »

« I do. »

« Why should I take you as a mate then? »

« Because it feels good? »

This is not what he wanted to say. He didn’t want this. Well, he wanted this but not that way and yet he had said exactly what Tony wanted to hear. Tony had made him say that.

« It does feel good. You feel good. You’re the best. … » Tony paused for a moment and talked again. « If I am going to do this, I want you to be ready whenever I need you to be. I will not suffer a ‘no’. If you want something you are allowed to ask but if I’m not willing or available it’s not going to happen. I want you out of my face as soon we are finished. And most of all, I expect you to be _mine_ _only_. Do you agree? » 

« I do. I want this. I need it. »

« Okay. I’m gonna make you mine. I’m going to mark you. »

Steve felt a wave of warmth inside. He was going to have everything. He was going to be Tony’s. He was burning with desire. Tony was still hard inside of him. He started moving again, slowly. He was rubbing against his soft spot every time he thrusted. Steve was drowning in pleasure and couldn’t hold back his moans. His cock was dripping and his ass was slick in juice and come. Tony grabbed his dick and pressed it hard and started to stroke it gently. Steve was about to come but Tony dropped it just in time. He grabbed his hips firmly and thrusted forcefully. He bent over Steve, headed his mouth to Steve’s neck and started sucking on his skin. His lips brushed down his shoulder and he seized his muscles with his jaw and bit hard. He bit Steve until he bled. It was so painful and mesmerizing. As the teeth penetrated his skin, Steve felt like Tony was penetrating his heart and soul. Steve came, leaking flow of come on the tiled floor of the shower. He was kneeling down completely, Tony above him was massaging his exhausted muscles. He was fulfilled, heart body and mind. Then, he felt it growing inside and invade him completely. Tony’s rod expanded inside of him deeper and wider than he could have ever imagined. He was completely full, tensed and paralyzed. He was not himself anymore. He was Tony’s. He was not his own person anymore. He was parts of Tony. He was whole and nothing at the same time. He couldn’t think of anything, only feel the bliss of doing exactly what he was supposed to.

They stayed like this for a moment that could have been a few minutes to a whole day. Steve didn’t know anymore and didn’t care. Then Tony deflated and reduced to normal size and Steve’s feelings came back. He was himself again. He could move again. Tony pulled out and stood up, releasing his grip on Steve who vacillated on his weak limbs. Tony held his hand and helped him to stand up. Warm water ran down on their bodies and Tony rubbed Steve’s skin affectionately clean and held him steady on his feet. When Steve could stand on his own again. Tony washed quickly and got out, leaving Steve in his thought to process everything that had happened. 

« I’m Tony’s. » Steve said to himself. « I’m Tony’s mate » he repeated as a wide smile was drawn on his face. 

When he came out of the shower he realized he only had his dirty clothes from training with him. He considered putting them on and hesitated, he wasn’t going to get out of the shower naked, right? Well, it’s not like Tony hadn’t seen him naked already but it didn’t seem appropriate. He would feel out of place in the middle of these luxurious apartments. As he started to put on his old clothes the British voice spoke.

« Mr Stark says you can look inside the wardrobe and take something, if you can find anything you fit in. Second door on your left. »

Steve was startled but put on a towel around his hips and followed the instructions. He found a T-shirt and sweatpants stretchy enough to fit in and joined Tony in the main room. He could smell food.

« Did you..? » Steve began to ask but was interrupted by the quick reply.

« Me cooking? Of course not, I had Jarvis order it for you. I told you you’d eat later right? I’m gonna take care of you from now on. »

Steve bent his head down and smiled, touching the itchy mark on the bottom of his neck. He was Tony’s now.

« I’ve marked you. I put my scent on you. I knotted you. You’re mine now. Do you realize it? »

« Yes. » Steve answered, smiling even more.

« We’re bonded now. We are mates. You are mine and I’m yours. »

« Yes. »

« It doesn’t mean we’re stuck together until one of us die. When you want out we can break this bond. »

« I don’t… » Steve was interrupted again.

« But as long as you are mine, you will do as I say. I will not tolerate disobedience, as far as our relationship goes, I mean. Work is work. The rest of your life is the rest of your life. But that? That’s different. Do you get it? »

« I get it. »

« You’re mine now. Alphas will sense my scent on you. They will know you belong to me. They will see my mark on you. They won’t try to mount you, even if you are in heat. Unless you let them. Only you or I can break the bond. »

« Okay. »

« Right. Eat your food and go back to your life. I have something to do in the workshop. Bye. »

Steve didn’t have the time to reply or protest. Tony was already out. He finished his food alone, in Tony’s suite, feeling happy and scared at the same time.

 

When he went back to the common room. Natasha smiled fondly at him. 

« Steve! You’re marked. Are you okay? »

Steve smiled happily as a reply.

« I’m so happy for you. This is what you wanted? You and Tony will be good together I’m sure. You two were meant to be. »

Steve’s smile dejected. He was Tony’s. They were mate. They were bonded. But Steve realized that their relationship was far from what Natasha was implying. It was just sex. It was a convenient arrangement. There was nothing true and pure as ‘being meant for each other’ was but he didn’t tell. He had realized that he had brought it upon himself. He had told Tony he didn’t want to date him. He had told him he didn’t want more and now, he didn’t have more. He had nothing. Yet, he was excited about what was going to happen next. He was already thinking about the next time Tony would call for him and he couldn’t stop smiling in expectation. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The relationship progresses and doesn't progress at the same time. Sorry if you think it's not moving forward enough.
> 
> NEXT TIME : Steve has his third heat.


	21. Steve is a bit frustrated.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve is unhappy with his relationship with Tony and wants to end it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to all of you who have the patience to follow this story. Thanks for your comments and kudos that motivate me.  
> I'm sorry I'm being mean to Steve. Can't help it. I hope you enjoy this chapter.

« You next heat is going to be in three days. » Bruce announced during their daily check ups. 

 

« Already? But it hasn’t even been a month and a half yet. »

 

« I know. It seems your heats are getting closer. Maybe your cycles are regulating themselves like I predicted. Soon you might not need me anymore. Your heats seem less powerful too. It didn’t last as long as usual last time, right? »

 

« Yeah. Maybe. I don’t know. Last time was a bit… messed up. There was too much at stake to focus on my heat. I don’t know exactly. »

 

« Yeah, of course. Maybe this time you should pay attention and tell me. I won’t be able to check on you. Now that you belong to Alpha. Tony will never let me get close to you during your heat. »

 

Steve felt happy about that but he was skeptical. Tony had not been very possessive with him. He could live his life pretty much as he used to except for when Tony called for him. 

 

« You think? He hasn’t been very safeguarding with me. »

 

« This is a different time, Steve. Alphas don’t control their omegas as their slaves. Tony wants you to be your own person I suppose. He won’t control everything you do. No alpha does that nowadays. It doesn’t mean that he won’t during your heat. Alphas tend to be very protective and monopolizing when their omegas are in heat. Be warned. »

 

Steve got worried. He didn’t want Tony to be that way with him. Not if he was going to go back to how he was now, afterward. Steve didn’t want to feel this if he couldn’t have it when his heat would be over. Up until now, Steve had only seen Tony for sex or for work. Tony would call for him or break into his room. Steve expected it. He waited for it all day long. It was the only thing in his mind. He would even neglect his duties for it. Steve knew it was fucked up. He knew this couldn’t continue this way. When sex happened he loved it, he indulged in it. He was fulfilled and completely sated. He was happy in Tony’s arms. And then, there was the waking up. As soon as it was over, Tony would leave him alone. And every time, Steve felt emptier and lonelier and more depressed he had ever been. But he would go back to him. He needed it like a druggie needs his shots, like a drunk needs his drinks. He was addicted.

 

Steve was deep in his thought and didn’t give Bruce any sort of response.  

 

« Are you two okay? »

 

"Mmh, yeah why? »

 

« I don’t know. You seem a bit unhappy. Is Tony okay? We don’t see much of him lately. »

 

Steve hated how Bruce could be so perceptive sometimes. He didn’t want him to know. He didn’t want his friends to know. He wasn’t in the mood to explain himself to the rest of the team and he wasn’t in the mood to listen to their disapproval about his relationship choices. He suspected they would not approve of what he was doing with Tony but it wasn’t any of their business. Having sex with Tony was the best thing he had ever had in his life. It was the purest, the truest, the most obvious thing he had in his life. He wasn’t ready to lose it, even if it was making him feel miserable afterward.

  

« I’m fine. Tony is just depressed because he is still unable to be Iron Man. He is probably avoiding you because he is jealous and frustrated. »

 

« Yeah. That must be hard for him. At least he has you now. You two are happy together, right? »

 

« Yeah. » Steve tried to answer as convincingly as he could but he probably didn’t succeed because Bruce looked at him with a doubtful expression.

 

« You don’t have to do this if you don’t want it, Steve. You _can_ break the bond if it doesn’t suit you. »

 

« I don’t. I’m happy. I swear. Besides, I don’t really have any other choice, do I? »

 

« You do, actually. You always have a choice. I’m almost done with the suppressants. We can try them if you’re not happy like this. Are you still struggling with who you are? Are you still thinking about the operation? »

 

« No. I’m fine. I’m happy like this. You were right… » Steve blushed all over his face and finished his sentence almost whispering « about the sex thing… »

 

« Look. Feeling pleasure during sex doesn’t mean you are omega. It is a normal, biological thing. It doesn’t mean you’re not someone else deep inside. You need to think carefully about who you are and what you want. »

 

« I… I think I was wrong. I was just not ready for this… I think… And Tony wouldn’t let— »

 

« Stop using Tony as an excuse. Tony is Tony. You are You. I know he’s controlling and commanding, he is your Alpha and he is Pack alpha but he can’t control you. He’s barking a lot but that doesn’t mean you can’t make your own choices. Tony can’t stop you from being who you are and he won’t. »

 

Steve was annoyed as Bruce was almost scolding him. He was basically insinuating that it was Steve’s fault if he was in this situation. Tony was controlling him because he had let him. He knew Bruce was somehow right and he didn’t want to accept it. He’d rather sink even further into his addiction.

 

« I… I don’t want… If I take the suppressants. What will it do? »

 

« It will considerably reduce the effects of your heat. You will be aroused, but just the way you are when not in heat: that is to say you’ll have self control. It will lower the emission of pheromones in your scent so you will not attract alphas more than the usual. It will also significantly diminish your sexual pleasure… »

 

Steve tensed. What? There was no way he would accept that. He would not reduce his pleasure. The only thing that was worth living for in his life right now. He would not compromise on that. No way. Tony would take care of him. He would be happy and content. 

 

« I don’t think I’ll need them. »

 

Bruce chuckled, his smile full of innuendos.. « Yeah. Sure. As you want, Cap. »

 

« I’m sorry to interrupt your conversation, Dr Banner, but Captain Rogers is expected in Mr Stark’s workshop as soon as possible. » JARVIS’s voice echoed in the lab.

 

Steve felt a wave of warmth inside his body and started to grin stupidly. He was suddenly very excited. He hadn’t had his dose of Tony today and had felt restless all morning. Bruce noticed the changes in Steve and laughed.

 

« Well, well, well…  Alpha’s waiting. Let’s not make him wait for too long. » Bruce said mockingly and finished quickly the check up. 

Steve got up as fast as possible and couldn’t have left the lab any faster. Bruce just had the time to tell him to be safe and he was gone.

 

Steve was waiting for the elevator, his heart beating fast.  He didn’t know what he was going to get. He never knew. It was always a surprise and it participated greatly to his obsession. Tony was playing with his feelings, he drove him crazy.  

 

Steve barged inside the workshop as soon as JARVIS let him in and ran to his alpha’s feet and knelt down.  That was one of the few things that Steve did that was not imposed by Tony. He had never asked Steve to do it but it turned him on each time. Steve always felt safe and content at Tony’s feet. He sometimes contemplated staying like this for the rest of his life, but fortunately, at some point, he would come to his senses.

Tony smiled fondly at him and stroke his head. Steve could see how proud he was in his eyes and felt happy about it. He had been a good omega. 

« You are amazing. » Tony praised. « I can’t get enough of you… Open you mouth. »

It lasted ten minutes. Steve stepped out of the workshop with a lump in his throat, tears in his eyes and the taste of semen in his mouth.

That night he cried for the first time since his first heat. It was all too clear. He had to escape this fucked-up relationship before he lose himself in it completely. It had already started to have consequences on his work. He couldn’t concentrate on being what he had always loved the most. What made him happy: being an Avenger. He was too obsessed and miserable. 

He had changed, he was turning into someone else, someone he hated and despised. Tony treated him like shit. He played with him and was destroying him little by little. _He didn’t even kiss him once_ , Steve realized. 

He needed this to stop. Bruce was right. He had a choice. 

 

…

 

Steve woke up very early and was happy to be in his own room. Tony had given him the chance to escape him. He had left him his freedom by forcing him to leave every time. Maybe he had known, maybe that was why he had insisted that Steve agreed to everything that was going to happen. 

He went out for a run. He ran for hours, trying to sweat Tony off of him. Trying to fight this addiction.  He wanted to be himself again. He wanted to be sane again. He wanted to be Captain America again, not a fucked up shadow of him. 

Running had helped. Steve felt lighter and free. He came back to the Tower strong-willed. He was going to have a discussion with Tony, tell him how he felt. If they were to break their bond then, be it. Sometimes Steve felt like Tony was doing it out of pity, that he didn’t care about him the slightest. Tony would not miss him, he thought.

When Steve came out of the elevator he was in front of Tony’s door again. 

« Jarvis, I want to go to my room. This is not the right floor. »

« It is now. And it will be so during the whole duration of your heat, Sir. Mr Stark has made all the arrangements. You will find everything necessary for your stay here, including your arts supplies. Mr Stark wishes for you to be happy during your stay in his apartments. »

Steve laughed bitterly. Of course, Bruce was right. Tony was not going to let anyone near him from now on and his heat was only supposed to be in 2 days. He assumed Alphas could already scent it. His resolve was deflating. How could he fight Tony like this? Especially, when he found all this extremely cute and attractive. Tony wasn’t playing fair.

« Am I, at least, allowed to move around in the Tower? » 

« Not without Mr Stark’s consent, no. »

« This is completely illegal, you know that. It is called sequestration. »

« As I already explained I am— »

« Not programmed to do what is legal but what Mr Stark tells you to do, I know… »

« Indeed, Captain. »

« Can you at least tell Tony that I’m here and I wish to speak to him. »

« Mr Stark is currently at an important SI meeting. He should be able to join you for lunch. He got the message. »

« Thanks Jarvis. »

« It is my pleasure, Sir. »

Steve had no choice but to accept the situation now. At least, until lunch. He was appeased. After a long shower he found a whole section of Tony’s dressing intended for him. It was bigger than four times his own wardrobe and full of clothes. Not his own, new ones but definitely meant for him. When he was dressed, breakfast was waiting for him in the small kitchen of Tony’s suite. Jarvis had ordered. He ate in silence, his mind peaceful. Then Jarvis pointed him out a small bright room in which he could admire the whole city from the window. This room was made for him according to Jarvis. He found all his arts supplies and his computer and tablet in it. The real ones this time. Steve smiled fondly. _Tony cared_. Tony must care if he was doing all that for him, right?

Steve looked at the easel and canvas close to the window. He hadn’t sketched for months. He had been so preoccupied by all this omega thing. He had forgotten himself, what he liked, what he wanted. He had forgotten how much he enjoyed arts. 

He settled down and tried to draw something. After two hours we could clearly recognize the face looking at him with piercing eyes on the paper. Maybe he was not so ready to let this go yet.

 

Tony found him focused on the view outside the window when he came back from his meeting. He paced silently inside and stood behind Steve. He put his warm hands on Steve shoulders and Steve startled at the touch. He hadn’t heard Tony coming. Steve felt immediately appeased by the powerful aura surrounding him. He looked up behind him and saw Tony smiling at him. He smiled in return. Tony was massaging his shoulders.

« Do you like the room? » He asked.

« Yeah. I really love it. »

« Good. I don’t want you to get bored. »

« Are you really serious about keeping me here for three days? »

« Of course. We can’t risk something like last time happening again. I will not let it. »

« Don’t you think you’re a bit exaggerating? »

« I’m not. »

« Nothing’s gonna happen to me in the Tower. »

« You don’t need to go around the Tower. Everything you need is here. »

« I’ll go crazy if I can’t go to the gym. »

« I’ll let you go to the gym. When you’re with me. »

« Really? You’re gonna supervise all of my moves? »

« If I have to, yeah. I want you to be safe. »

« Tony… »

« This is not negotiable. »

« Tony… »

« I won’t change my mind about this. Your safety is my priority. »

« Tony. »

« I can’t let you wander around a Tower full of alphas. »

« Tony… You’ve marked me. We’re bonded. Nobody is going to come close to me. »

« Okay. I let you go around the Tower if Jarvis is supervising you but only until your heat starts. »

« And what if there’s an emergency? I can’t not go. I’m the captain. You’re still in recovery. I can’t risk the team going on their own. »

« I’ll decide when there is one. It will depend on the emergency. And I can totally go. I’m fine now. »

« I guess I don’t really have the choice, do I? »

« Indeed, you don’t. »

The conversation had gone quite well. Steve was not entirely satisfied with the outcome but he had been able to compromise and Tony hadn’t been that much difficult to convince. Maybe Steve could affirm himself more. Maybe Tony was giving him more decisional power in their relationship that he thought he had. 

There had been no emergency. At least, not one that needed the whole team to go. Steve had spend two enjoyable days in Tony’s apartment. Even though he hadn’t slept in Tony’s bedroom, he had been happy. Tony was nice and courteous, very much worried about his well being. 

Steve was training in the gym when he felt the first symptoms of his heat. He quickly went back to Tony’s apartments. He was not going to get him angry now when they had probably just spend the two most peaceful days together since they had met. He took a thorough shower, put on comfortable clothes and he waited for his alpha patiently. He was excited and expecting. 

As soon as the door opened, Steve felt a wave of warmth inside of him. Tony looked at him with hungry eyes. He saw the same eager desire he had seen in his eyes the very first time. 

Tony came to him and took slowly and delicately every piece of clothing off of Steve’s body just like he was unwrapping a present. He took him to his room. It was all ceremonial, almost sacred. He lay him on the bed as if they were going to have their wedding night. It was his first heat as Tony’s mate. He thought there were gonna go at it like animals but Tony was unexpectedly in control and made the whole thing feel holy. Tony explored every part of Steve’s body with patience and passion. He was absorbed in discovering everything about him. All his senses were awakening. Steve was plunged into a dreamlike atmosphere of safety and ease. He was losing himself completely, letting Tony do whatever he wanted with him.

And then, they did go at it like animals. Tony fucked him for hours. They didn’t leave the bedroom except for the occasional drink or meal (or piss) and Steve understood the meaning of Tony’s words when he had said he couldn’t properly take care of his needs during their first time. Steve hadn’t even been the master of his own moves once. Tony had taken him brutally and violently. He had manhandled him in every position, in every direction. Steve had begged for more, for harder, for deeper. And Tony had pounded into him so fiercely that Steve couldn’t think anymore.

There had been almost 20 hours that they were in bed. Steve was exhausted and sore everywhere. Tony had over-used every parts of his body. He was stiffen and aching. He had been brutally taken, forcefully invaded, firmly held down and hurtfully restricted. He had loved it, every part of it. He was completely fulfilled. 

He wanted to remain this way a little. He wanted to enjoy this feeling a little longer. He was not stupid. He knew that it wasn’t going to last. He knew that Tony would soon reject him as he had done for three weeks. 

His alpha was sleeping next to him, holding him tight against him. He had always wanted to sleep next to Tony. Now his alpha was by his side, defenseless, in his most vulnerable state. Steve felt content and let himself dose off. 

He was woken up by a hard warmth rutting against him. Tony was insatiable. He was rubbing himself against Steve’s thigh. He was still half asleep but he was already turning Steve’s body on the side. Steve felt his arms surround him and the heat of his body against his back. Tony was holding him so tight he could hardly breathe. His lips were brushing his neck and Steve felt ticklish as Tony was blowing air on his nape. He licked the mark on Steve’s shoulder. It was still there, despite the serum. The serum couldn’t heal the bonding mark of his mate. Steve was very happy about that and excited at the idea of it. He felt so sexy with Tony’s mark on his body. This place was very sensitive and Steve was already rubbing his ass against Tony’s cock, panting and moaning in pleasure. His ass was already slick and loose. He had been full for a whole day and was now stretched enough to get two cocks inside. Steve thought about the black toys he had played with on his lonely days, in the mansion. It would have definitely fit in now. Tony slipped his hard cock inside in one go. He was already very deep. His dick was swimming in a pool of semen and juice. It was splashing at each thrust. Tony was not brutal, he was gentle. He was caressing as if he wanted to heal the sore place with his cock. He wasn’t pushing hard, he wasn’t pressuring inside. He was fondling and holding Steve tight against him, so he would never leave him. It was as sweet and affectionate as cuddling. Something that Steve had never had the chance to do with Tony, thus, with anybody. Steve was being made love to, or so he thought. They both came at the same time, in a long synchronized groan. Tony waited for Steve to catch his breath and he turned him, face on the bed, and mounted him. He pulled Steve’s ass closer to him. « It is safe right? » he asked.

« Mmh? » Steve replied, still in a haze.

« You’re safe right? I don’t want complications. » Tony inquired a touch of worry in his voice. 

« Of course it’s safe. Who do you take me for? » Though he wasn’t really sure he had grasped the innuendos of the question.

Steve felt the knot invade him and fill him completely. He was plunged into a blissful stupor. He had touched paradise. He could die now, with no regrets.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know some of you expected a wild Tony during Steve's heat but I feel I have written so much sex recently that I just couldn't. Sorry if you're disappointed.
> 
> NEXT TIME: I'll let you imagine what's coming next. I'll try to update quickly if I can.
> 
> Do not hesitate to state your disapproval. I really appreciate feedbacks, positive or negative.


	22. Hitting Rock Bottom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve's emotionally fucked up state influences his ability to work. (I'm actually not sure it means something... Does it?)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the encouraging comments and kudos. 
> 
> I know I said I'll try to upload soon and I actually finished the draft of this chapter two days ago but didn't find the time or the courage or both to check it and correct it to be able to post it earlier. (actually more the courage because I used my time to read other better, less angsty, cheering up fics...) Stuff happened. Sorry.

Steve had never been to an amusement park. He had never tried a roller coaster. He wondered, though, if it would feel the same way he was feeling right now. One second he was at the top, the next he was hitting the bottom bitterly. Then he remembered that he had his lot of extreme sensations with the Avengers thing so the rollercoaster was probably not the right metaphor to describe how he felt. 

Just yesterday morning Tony had made love to him. He had fondled him, cuddled him in the most loving and passionate embrace. They had been joined together in the purest, the most sacred bond any lovers could have. Tony had taken care of all his needs afterward, like he was his little princess. Steve had been over the moon. 

Today was the bitter return to reality. Steve had been kindly asked to return to his quarters. Where he was now safe since his heat was over. The last few days had been a haze, a dream, a peaceful and loving parenthesis in between the fucked up relationship he had committed himself to with Tony. Steve was devastated and doubtful and questioning himself and his future in this Tower. He couldn’t continue like this.

 

There was no point in hoping for more. He would never have more. Tony wasn’t the dating type. He had told Steve so. He had been making efforts because Steve had insisted, maybe Steve had lured him to do it when he didn’t want it. He had been insisting and nagging. He was a very powerful omega after all, or so they had said. Maybe Tony had done this because he valued him as a friend but it was too much to actually date him. He had promised he would take care of his needs and he had, and now that he was done with his duties he was going to take some time for himself.

Tony had never promised he would be faithful. He had asked Steve to be but he had never said he would be. Steve had never asked either. And thinking about it, why would he have? He had never asked Tony to date him. He had never thought about dating Tony. He just wanted to have someone to take care of his heats and his growing sexual desire. This is what he had told Tony, why would he have more when he was the one who had asked for this. He was so stupid. How could he have not known that he could never be satisfied with a purely sexual relationship with his mate. 

This had been a fucked up idea from the very beginning. He wanted more, so much more but on the other hand, he hated Tony. He had never liked him. He was just influenced now because Tony had been his first. He was influenced because he knew Tony and he trusted him as a teammate. He was influenced because he was omega and because Tony was alpha. But Tony was not the only alpha in the world. And a teammate is not the same thing as a lover. Actually, a teammate should never be a lover. He could see that clearly now. He could not longer do his work properly because Tony was on the team. 

You should never mix feelings with work. This was unprofessional and reckless and could have disastrous consequences. Actually, it had already. Steve should have ended this relationship long ago.

 

 

…

 

 

« Cap ? »

 

« … »

 

« Captain! »

 

« … »

 

« What the fuck man! » 

 

Clint’s voice resonated in his head. He had his shield on his arm and blood on his hands. He was on a battlefield. Natasha was on the ground. Unconscious. Clint was all over the place. He was furious and terrified at the same time. He looked at his lover in despair. Steve could have avoided this. The enemy was in his range. He could have stopped it. He should have stopped it. He would have, if he hadn’t been so out of it ever since he’d got up this morning. 

He hadn’t really slept well. He had been too preoccupied. _Tony_. Tony had been on his mind all night long. Tony was always on his mind. He had told himself he would end this relationship quickly and yet, more than a week had passed since his last heat (amazing heat, by the way). 

Every time he saw Tony he would forget everything else. He would drown in his alpha powers, in sex and pleasure. Then he would leave feeling dirty and used. That was his routine now. He was so obsessed that nothing else mattered. Only the twenty minutes of his day when he relieved himself with his teammate aka mate —They were still bonded after all — were important to him. It brought him twenty minutes of ecstasy, twenty minutes of pure happiness, twenty minutes of meaning in his day when the rest of it was only miserable and depressing. Nothing mattered to him anymore, not his friends, not his hobbies, not his job. He was just a shadow of himself. He was just a sex machine. Horny from dawn to twilight. He wondered how he could have ended up so low. He hated himself. He hated his life. He hated his friends. He hated Tony. He hated this century he was living in. He wanted to go back to his life. The one he had before, when it was simple, when there was only two sides on things, when Bucky was there. He missed him terribly. Steve wondered if maybe he was having a nervous breakdown. Maybe he was. Maybe he wasn’t. Who cared? At this point, did it really matter?

Tony had come to his room last night while he was reading a book on his bed, resting on his stomach. He had told him to stay in his position exactly. He had come from behind and slipped down his pajama pants. He had shoved something in his ass and had played with him for a moment. Then, he had thrusted his cock inside and he had groaned, pushing Steve’s head in the pillows as he came. He had stood up and brought his dick to his mouth so Steve would lick it clean. Steve had done everything. He hadn’t come. He was left on his bed used and depraved, his pants down and a huge hard on. Hurting inside and outside. It was too much. He couldn’t do it anymore. He knew he couldn’t resist Tony. What could he do to avoid him and recover his sanity before it is too late?

 

« What’s wrong with you man? What the fuck is wrong with you? You’re fucking up big, Steve! … »

 

Clint was rambling about what had happened during battle. He had fucked up. Again. He knew that, he didn’t need Clint to harass him now. He was already hating himself enough for the both of them. So much for the perfect Captain America. He was just an illusion. That guy never existed. 

 

Natasha was fine. They had won. They had just learned that Tony was feeling better. He could go back to being Iron Man. Everything was getting better, for everyone. 

 

« Steve. » Natasha called, in the corridor before he went inside his own room.

 

« What? I said I’m sorry. What more do you want me to do? I know I fucked up. I’m sorry alright. I don’t know what else I can say. » 

 

« I don’t care about that. Shit happens. Don’t bother about Clint. He was just worried about me. That’s all. You would react the same if Tony was on the ground unconscious right? »

 

Steve chuckled bitterly. Would he really? Yeah, he probably would. That was not the point. The point was how would Tony react if it was _him_ on the ground. Would he care? Probably not.

 

« Steve, I’m really worried about you. You’re not yourself lately. You don’t come down with us anymore. You don’t smile anymore. You’re out of it. I hate seeing you like this. »

 

Steve didn’t answer. He couldn’t. It was so true. He felt so heavy. Lately he had been feeling like he was carrying his own shadow around like a millstone. He had a weigh in his chest, so heavy it dragged him down through the ground. The lump in his throat was choking his words. 

 

« Steve… » 

 

Natasha had noticed how on edge he was. She put her hand on his back, trying to comfort him. It was too much. The kind gesture had destroyed Steve’s last barrier. He started crying. Natasha took him in her arms and let him cry on her shoulder for a few minutes before escorting him to his room. She didn’t say anything. They were on his bed and Steve was still crying silently. 

 

« I can’t do this anymore. » Steve started to explain. « I am not myself anymore. I feel so empty. I hate myself. I want to be me again, Nat. »

 

« What are you talking about, Steve? Is this about the gender thing? »

 

« No, I… I don’t… It's... It’s _Tony_. I thought I could do it. I really thought I could... but I really can’t. I hate this relationship, Nat, I hate it. I’m so unhappy like this. »

 

« What has he done now? I’m gonna kill him if he hurt you. »

 

« Nothing. Don’t make a fuss about it, please. I… It’s me. I want to end this but I can’t. Every time I see him… I can’t resist. What’s wrong with me? »

 

« Oh Steve. Do you want me to talk to him? »

 

« Please no. I can fight my own battles. I’m not a kid anymore. »

 

« Look Steve. I don’t know what’s going on in your head right now but… Don’t be so hard on yourself okay. Look at the facts, you’ve spent your whole life thinking you were Alpha. You’ve build your life and dreams around this idea. And Suddenly, your heats come, more powerful than ever. You discover new feelings, you discover sex and mating, you discover desire. No wonder you’re confused. You’ve been living in a few months what teenagers have years to get over with. You’ve had your adolescent crisis at 25 and you didn’t even take one minute to sit down and think about it. You’ve been focusing on others your whole life and forgot yourself in the process. Maybe you need some time for yourself. »

 

« But Tony.. » 

 

« Tony what? Stop it with Tony. Tony is not the only alpha available in the whole world. You’re obviously not ready for this. End it with Tony. Tony is different. He’s comfortable being his own person. He has been enjoying being Alpha for at least 25 years. You realize it? If you had been born in this century, Tony would have started to have sex while you were just born.»

 

« Silly. » Steve, said. Natasha had succeeded in making him smile.

 

« Hey! Don’t call me silly. you’re the stupid one. » She had hit him with a pillow.

 

« I know… I’m the worst moron of all times. » 

 

« Shush. Enough with the self-loathing. Get your life back on tracks. Why don’t you take a few days to think about what you want? We can manage. »

« You want me out of the team? »

« I don’t want you out. Don’t be daft. I care so much about you. And, well, you’re not expendable. If you were to break down we’ll be in deep shit but... Even so, you’re well being is what's important. I want you to be happy. I love you. We all love you. We all want you to be happy, even if it means you leaving the team for a while.»

 

Steve had calmed down and felt a lot better. He was so ungrateful. He had really good friends and he had ignored them to focus on one guy who didn’t deserve any of his affection. He was done with Tony. From now on, he would think about himself only. He would enjoy his life. 

 

Steve searched in his bedside table for his earphones. He wanted to listen to music before going to bed. He didn’t find them (because they were in the other one) but he found something else, a lot more interesting than his earphones. Something he had forgotten here some times ago : James’ card.

Steve smiled. He remembered dreaming about this once. It had not turned out as expected. Steve was not dreaming now. _James_. James was hot and powerful. He looked like Bucky. He sounded like Bucky. He was _Alpha_. He was kind. 

Steve looked at the time. It was only 8 p.m. He hadn’t even had dinner, yet. He could call him now. Okay maybe not call him. But text him?

Steve rewrote his text a thousand times before finally sending a simple:

 

‘Hi!’

 

‘Hey you!’ was the instant reply.

 

STEVE : Can we talk?

 

JAMES : And you are?

 

Steve was so stupid. James didn’t have his number.

 

STEVE : Sorry, that was stupid. You must have forgotten about me. We met in a bar. Maybe 4 months ago. I’m Steve.

 

JAMES : I remember you.

 

STEVE : You do?

 

JAMES : How could I not? We don’t meet omegas like you very often. And the kiss was definitely hot.

 

Steve blushed reading this text. He brushed his lips and reminisced the kiss. His first and _only_ kiss. 

 

STEVE : I remember too.

 

JAMES : So what did you want to talk about?

 

STEVE : I don’t know. Anything.

 

JAMES : Pb with your bf?

 

STEVE : Bf?

 

JAMES : Bf = boyfriend

 

STEVE : Sorry. I’m not used to texting. (Author's note : my words)

 

JAMES : I can tell. 

 

STEVE : How did you know I have a boyfriend?

 

JAMES : Pretty obvious last time.

 

STEVE : I didn’t have a boyfriend last time.

 

JAMES : And now you do?

 

STEVE : No. Not anymore.

 

JAMES : I see. Don’t worry. BF are like heats. They come and go. ;-)

 

STEVE : I’m not sure to want one only once a month though.

 

JAMES : :-D

 

STEVE : Can I call you?

 

James called at once. They talked. All night long. It was so simple with James. He was simple and kind. Not an asshole. Not a drama queen. Not damaged, like Tony was.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yeah. I did make Tony the bad guy to bring James back into the picture... I really did.


	23. Steve does something stupid. (and Tony is an asshole)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve flirts with James.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to all of you who left encouraging comments and kudos. helps a lot.

« Hi gorgeous! » James’s voice said on the phone.

 

Steve blushed. He was on his bed, in a lascivious position, a huge grin on his face.

 

« Hi! » 

 

« What’s up? »

 

« Nothing… »

 

« You’ve been training? »

 

« Yep. Just came back. »

 

« Have you had a shower? » 

 

« Not Yet » 

 

Steve was slightly biting his lips as James’s alpha voice was becoming seductive.

 

« So you must be sweaty all over. » 

 

« Yeah. And Sticky. »

 

« Really? That’s hot. »

 

« Wanna see? »

 

Steve had never been able to use his phone for other things than calling people until he met James. Then suddenly he learned how to do so many things with it, such as taking a picture of his body in his tight and sweaty training clothes and send it while having a phone conversation. 

 

« That is the hottest thing I’ve ever seen. »

 

« Do you like it? »

 

« Are you kidding me?  I so want you in my bed right now. »

 

Steve was blushing again (and getting hard.) He could picture himself, in bed, with James.

 

Chatting with James was refreshing. Steve finally understood what it meant to flirt and to date and realized that he didn’t have any of this in his relationship with Tony. With Tony it was cold and feelingless. Tony was hard. It wasn’t that he was mean or uncaring, he was just unfeeling. He had closed his heart. He didn’t let anybody in, and especially not Steve. 

 

Steve wanted more. He wanted to learn about Tony. He wanted to discover who he was underneath. He felt that whether he was inside or outside the armor, there was always an iron protection between them. James, on the other hand, was open. They could talk about anything. He could talk about his feelings. He had mentioned Bucky and how he missed him and James had listened and sympathized. Tony didn’t even know any of his former friends. He loved speaking with James on the phone. 

 

It had been a week since the incident on the battlefield with Natasha, a week since he had seen Tony for the last time, a week since he had sex, a week since he had started texting and calling James. Tony neglected him but he had not missed him. He had found someone else to spent time with and they had openly flirted. 

 

« I think I’d like that… Maybe. »

 

« Maybe? or you’d like that? »

 

« Can I think about it first? »

 

« You’re such a prude, Stevie »

 

« I’m not. »

 

« You so are. You sound like a virgin. »

 

« I’m not. »

 

« Prove it. »

 

« I can prove it. Ask me what you wanna know. »

 

« Words are empty. I want action. »

 

« What? »

 

« Don’t pretend. You understood perfectly what I meant. I wanna meet. Are you in? »

 

Steve’s heart started beating fast. He hesitated before answering. It was one thing to flirt on the phone and another thing to meet in person. Steve had played the flirting game but he was still Tony’s mate and Tony had been clear about that. He was to remain Tony’s only. Steve didn’t wanna be unfaithful. He wasn’t that kind of person. He realized that what he had been doing with James was bad, worse than he had thought at first. But even though he was feeling guilty, he wanted to see James. He needed to. He needed to feel his warmth to forget about Tony’s coldness. James was treating him so kindly. He felt desire for James. Guilty arousal. After all Tony was treating him like shit. It was fair that he would hurt him in return, wasn’t it? Tony had deserved it.

 

« I’m not sure, I can. »

 

« That’s what I thought. _Virgin_. » James teased.

 

« Okay. When do you wanna meet? »

 

« Tomorrow? Same bar. 6 p.m.? »

 

« Deal. »

 

And that was it. Steve had a date. With James. He knew it was bad. He didn’t even know how he was going to hide it from Tony. As far as he knew, Tony could be spying on him right now. That was really bad and really dangerous and really stupid but Steve wanted to go so much.

 

James had hung up and Steve started to fantasize about him. It was the first time that he was thinking about having sex with someone else since Tony. How would it be like? Would he be as wild, as aggressive as Tony? Or would he be gentle? Steve secretly hoped that he would be beastly.He wasn’t sure he’d be satisfied with it otherwise. He loved sex with Tony. More than he wanted to admit. 

 

Steve had started drawing James, from his memory. He was getting a bit hot while thinking about it. He started touching himself a little while looking at his drawing. Then he heard a click on his door. He panicked, dropped everything, put his underwear back on. Only one person could break into his room like that. _Tony_. Steve didn’t want it now. He didn’t want to have Tony touch him when he was thinking about James. He didn’t move. He didn’t kneel down. He was too guilty for that.

 

« Tony? It’s been a while. » Steve feigned surprise.

 

« Hey Babe. I know I’m sorry. »

 

« Since when do you call me babe? »

 

« What do you want me to call you? Cap? »

 

« I don’t care how you call me. » 

 

Steve went to his feet and his hands started to work on Tony’s fly. ‘The faster the better’ he thought. Steve hoped that if he took the initiative he might not have to go all the way. Maybe, if he sucked him off good Tony wouldn’t touch him, and Steve could imagine James while doing it.

 

« Please don’t do that. I feel like I’m treating you like a whore. » Tony said painfully. « I haven’t come for that. »

 

Steve looked at him incredulously. He was so startled that he didn’t move. Tony sat down on his bed. Steve stood up and looked at him, not understanding anything.

 

« Were you drawing? » Tony asked, genuinely interested. 

 

« Ye… Yes. »  Steve panicked inside. He was going to look at it. He would see. Too late. Tony already had the drawing in his hand.

 

« Who is it? Is it Bucky? »

 

Steve flabbergasted. How was that even possible?

 

« Err… Yes. How did you know? »

 

« It looks like him. I thought he had shorter hair, though. He was your best friend, right? You must really miss him. I’m sorry… About his death, I mean. »

 

Steve was going from surprise to surprise. Tony _knew_.

 

« Thank you. I do. I miss him terribly. How could… How do you…? »

 

« How do I know about him?  I know everything about you. You were my hero as a kid. I’ve always always admired you. I saw all your movies, read all the stories about you. » 

 

Steve listened incredulously as Tony was reminiscing his childhood. This was a part of Tony he had no idea about. 

 

« I wasn’t the only one. » he continued. « My dad. He spent his whole life searching for you. He was always talking about you. Actually, I was in competition against you. I never won though. You were always so much better. You still are. »

 

Steve felt his heart drown. Tony admired him. 

 

« Tony. I’m so sorry. »

 

« Don’t be. I don’t deserve it. »

 

Tony dropped the drawing and turned away from Steve’s gaze. He put his head in his hands and started talking.

 

« I’m trying to say sorry, Steve. »

 

« I don’t understand. »

 

« You’re too nice for your own good. Look. I can’t do this. It’s not you. It’s me. I have these feelings… I’ve been treating you like garbage. I just… I was just so angry… It’s not your fault. I’m just an asshole. I don’t do this. I don’t do relationships. I… But with you, I… I don’t want to have this with you. I want… This is hurting too much. »

 

« I’m sorry Tony, but I don’t understand. »

 

Tony chuckled. 

 

« I’m not good with feelings, Steve… even less good with relationships, I’m gonna fuck up this one too. Let’s just take some time to see where this is going…. I just need some time, okay? … I wish I could give you what you need but… I’m not sure I can. »

 

« Are you breaking the bond? »

 

« I just want to think about everything, just for a few days… Are you okay with that? »

 

« Yes. Sure. » Steve said unconvinced. 

 

Tony left. Steve had no idea what had just happened. Tony wanted to say something but he didn’t. Steve didn’t understand much, except the part where Tony didn’t want a relationship with him. Tony was letting him go. He was free. He was free to go to James. Part of him felt relieved and happy but a smaller, deeper part of him was feeling sad and powerless as Tony was abandoning him.

 

 

…

 

 

Steve was ecstatic. He was going to meet James in person, again. They had been flirting over the phone for more than a week. He was finally about to see him. He remembered their kiss. How soft, how sweet and how hot it was. He had never had this with Tony. James was so much better.

Steve had spent more than one hour in front of the mirror. Deciding. He didn’t have any help this time. He hadn’t told anyone. He was still scared of Tony. He wouldn’t want to risk him knowing about it. 

 

He pretended to want to visit an arts exhibition. He was sure no one would tag along. He went there earlier. He tended to do that. In the bar he was pacing anxiously, waiting for his drink. He was looking at the time every minute. Would he be on time? or late? What would he be wearing? Would he be happy to see him? Steve got cold feet. What if this was a mistake? What if James was an asshole who just wanted his ass, just like Tony was ? What if he didn’t fancy him the way he had when they had met before?

 

The door opened. Steve immediately turned his head to the entrance as he had done at every movement since his arrival. James was here. He had seen him. He was smiling. Steve’s heart flinched. He was smiling too. His heart was beating fast.

James paced toward him, determined, and then he stopped, his face distraught. Steve didn’t get it. 

 

« What the fuck, Steve? » James yelled, looking angry.

 

« What’s wrong? » Steve asked, dumbfounded.

 

« What are you playing at? »

 

« I don’t… »

 

« I’m not into this. Not my kind of thing. »

 

« Into what? What are you talking about? »

 

« Don’t play innocent. You’ve lied to me.»

 

« I… I didn’t… »

 

« You said it was over with your boyfriend! »

 

« It is! … It is… »

 

« It isn’t. And it’s not just a boyfriend. He’s your mate. You’re bonded. I can sense it. I can smell him on you. »

 

Steve tried to stutter an excuse but the words didn’t come out. He couldn’t deny the obvious. James was looking at him with a mix of anger and disappointment. 

 

« I’m so out of here.  Please don’t call. I don’t really wanna meddle. » He was leaving. 

 

« Please, wait. » Steve desperately cried out.

 

James stopped but didn’t turn to Steve. 

 

« Okay. That’s true » Steve admitted. « I have a mate. We’re bonded but we’re not in a relationship. It’s just sex. He doesn’t care about me. I’m just here for him to relieve himself when he’s horny. He doesn’t care about what I do…  Please don’t go. Let’s talk at least. »

 

James chuckled, his back turned toward Steve. 

 

« I seriously doubt it. No alpha would let his omega, especially one like you, go around other alphas like this. Whether they care about them or not. It’s a question of honor. »

 

« I swear he doesn’t care. He’s going to leave me. »

 

« I hope what you say is true, he’s powerful. I can sense it. He could kill me. » 

 

« He won’t. He wouldn’t do that. He’s not like that. »

 

James turned to Steve and smiled. 

 

« You’re really good at persuading people. I’m gonna regret this. I’m _really_ gonna regret this.»

 

« You won’t I swear. I would never let anything happen to you. »

 

James laughed. « I never thought I would ever hear an omega saying that to me. »

 

Steve smiled in return. « I’m not any omega. »

 

« You’re definitely not. »

 

« So, are you gonna stay and hang out with me? »

 

« I’m gonna hang out, but let’s go somewhere else. »

 

« How about an arts exhibition? » Steve suggested with a grin.

 

« Yeah. Sure. Let’s go, but you’re gonna teach me right? »

 

Steve spent a wonderful moment at the exhibition. He talked arts and James listened. He was curious and Steve felt really happy talking about his passion. He really reminded him of Bucky who was always interested in seeing his drawings. It was almost 10 p.m. They had just had dinner and were wandering in the streets in the cold night.

 

« So, tell me about this mate of yours. How did you end up in this relationship? »

 

« It’s complicated. »

 

« I see… » James was teasing.

 

« It’s just. » Steve hesitated before telling the truth (partly) « I can’t take suppressants and I struggled dealing with my heats so… I asked a co-worker to help me. »

 

« Seriously? You asked a _co-worker_ to fuck you during your heats? That’s so fucked up. »

 

« Yeah. I know. I was desperate. This was not a good idea. »

 

« So how does it go? Do you meet only for your heats? »

 

« Yeah. kinda. The thing is, he accepted to do it only if I accepted to have sex whenever he wanted, however he wanted and wherever he wanted in return. »

 

« And you did? »

 

« I did…. »

 

« Wow! I never thought you would do something like this. Who knew? And there was me, thinking you were a virgin.»

 

Steve felt ashamed. He had said too much and now James was judging him. He sounded like someone he wasn’t. 

 

«  I feel so used. » Steve justified himself. « I thought… I thought I could handle it but I think I can’t handle a purely sexual relationship.»

 

« Do you like him? »

 

« What? »

 

Steve had understood the question perfectly. It just was the last thing he thought he was going to get asked about. He hadn't even thought about it. 

 

« Do you have feelings for him? »

 

« I… I don’t know. I just… I know that I’m not satisfied with what we have, but … I don’t know. He’s..  He’s an asshole. »

 

« Why did you ask him then? »

 

« He was… the only one available? I guess? »

 

« So you went to a guy, that you don’t like, asked him to take care of you but only during your heats? That’s seriously fucked up, Steve. No wonder the guy’s unhappy. »

 

« What do you mean? »

 

« That’s a bit insensitive, don’t you think? I wouldn’t do that for a co-worker, especially if they thought I was an asshole… Why didn’t you try to find a real mate? Someone you like? Someone who cares about you? »

 

« I don’t think I have time for… Well I _didn’t_ think I had time for a lover. I’m kinda busy. I’ve got lots of responsibilities. »

 

« An omega with responsibilities. That’s so sexy. So what now? »

 

« What now? »

 

« Do you think you have enough time for a lover? »

 

« Maybe » Steve answered with a smile.

 

« Damn I’m gonna regret this. You’re trouble, Steve Rogers. » 

 

James pushed Steve in a dark alley and brought his lips to Steve’s. He stopped close enough for his breath to tickle Steve’s mouth. Steve knew what was going to happen now. He wanted it. It was exciting. He knew what he was doing, he knew perfectly well it was bad but something inside him pushed him to go all the way with it. Now, he was ready to risk everything for it. Or maybe he wasn’t really thinking about what he was risking.

 

« Are you sure about this? » James muttered. « I don’t wanna get your mate pissed. »

 

« You won’t. He’ll never know. »

 

« He will. »

 

« I’ll handle him. He doesn’t care. I’m burden to him. »

 

James kissed Steve deeply and languorously and Steve felt some sort of satisfaction knowing he was breaking the rules. The kiss was passionate but calm and slow. They’re was something exulting about it. They kissed for a long while before they decided to go. They (James) called for a cab and they went to his apartment. They kissed all the way to the entrance door. James pushed Steve against the door and rutted against him while he was turning the key in the doorknob. 

They stumbled inside, trying to get each others’s clothes off. Soon they were naked in the bedroom. James pushed Steve on his bed and he fell on his back, his legs spread. James lay above him and started to rub their erections together. Steve felt good. James was not as wild and controlling as Tony was but Steve enjoyed it anyway. He was starting to get wet. James slid his hand down his ass and slipped a finger inside. He took it out immediately and spat on it before putting it in again.

« What are you doing? »

« Lubricating. You’re not in heat. You’re not very wet. »

« I’m not? »

« Why? »

« Nothing. It’s weird. I never had this problem before… »

« Problem? »

« Never-mind. Keep going. »

James was good in bed. Everything he did felt good. He was experienced too. He was skilled. The problem wasn’t James. It was Steve. He just wasn’t that into it. It was disappointing because he liked James very much.

James massaged his insides and pleasured him touching his soft spot. Steve was ready. He could take him inside.

« Are you clean? » James asked a half conscious Steve.

« What? »

« Have you got any disease? »

« No. Of course not. I’m immune to most of them. »

« Really. That’s great. Can I really trust you? »

« You _can_ trust me. I’m not a liar. Why? »

« Well, I’d like to fuck you and knot you and we can’t do that with a condom. »

« Are we going to knot? »

« You don’t want to? »

« I don’t know. »

« We don’t have to if you don’t want to. »

James kissed him gently and brought his cock on his entrance. He teased it for a while which annoyingly frustrated Steve, he couldn't take it anymore. He didn't want to be teased, he wanted to be fucked. Now. 

James thrusted his cock inside slowly and kissed him passionately but Steve didn’t really respond to it. He felt weird. When he was completely inside, Steve felt a weigh in his chest. He suddenly wanted him to stop. He didn’t want this anymore. He felt extremely uncomfortable. That’s when he came up with the realization that he didn’t want James inside of him. There was something off with James, something that didn’t work out. He didn’t know what. It was not the same with Tony. With Tony sex was an evidence.  Being joined together with Tony was undeniably, unmistakably the best thing, the only thing that Steve was sure about wanting. They were so compatible. It was not forced, it was not uncomfortable. They belonged together. They were _meant_ for each other. He _wanted_ Tony.

Even though Tony didn’t want him, he wanted _Tony_. 

All of this, all the flirting, all the talking, all the eating together as a romantic date, everything he had done with James, he wanted it, but not with James. He wanted it with Tony. He loved him. _He loved Tony_. He had loved him for so long he didn’t realize it. He hadn’t realized until he was in bed with someone else. 

James gave deep and fast thrusts and each one of them made Steve hold back tears. It was probably too late for pushing him away. After all, he was the one who had seduced him. And Steve was a very submissive omega. He never thought he actually had the right to refuse alpha. James probably realized how tense Steve was but he didn’t stop until he came inside and collapsed on Steve’s chest.

« Shit. » 

« What’s wrong? » Steve asked.

« You’re asking me what’s wrong when you’re on the verge of crying?  Are you for real? »

« I’m sorry. »

« Never-mind. What’s done is done. I’m sorry I couldn’t stop. I should have but…  »

« No it’s my fault. I’m the one who came to you. » Steve felt stupid and guilty.

James let himself fall on his back next to an almost trembling Steve and grumbled.

« Fuck Steve. Get your mind straight. » James sighed in exasperation and put his hands on his face, probably to hide from reality. « Wow. This is fucked up. Shit. »

Steve felt guilty, he didn’t know if James was angry at him or at himself. It made him extremely uncomfortable.

« I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have… »

« Yeah… You shouldn’t have… »

« I don’t know what came to me… I don’t know why I did that. I’m not… that kind of person. »

James looked at him sympathetically.

« It’s not over with you mate, is it? »

« I don’t know. »

« You love him. » James told that more to himself that to Steve.  « You’re in love with him, right? »

« … » Steve couldn’t answer. It was so true. It was so obvious. How come he didn’t realize sooner? Now he had ruined everything. 

« Tell him, for fuck sake. Don’t fucking stay here like the world is ending. Go and tell him. »

 

Steve staggered up the bed and put on his clothes. James was looking at him, still naked on his bed, and pulled out a cigarette. 

 

« I’m sorry for leading you on. »

« It’s okay. I knew you were trouble the minute I saw you. I still went for it. It’s my fault for being that stupid. »

« I’m sorry. »

« For Fuck sake. Stop apologizing and go find your mate. I hope he will forgive us. »

« You’ve done nothing wrong. It’s my fault. You didn’t know. »

« Yeah. That’s half the truth. I knew. You’re marked and it’s pretty strong, I can tell. Not the mark of someone who does casual… I just… I wanted to believe… So much. »

« I’m really sorry. »

« It’s a bit late for that… I hope your mate is civilized. »

Steve didn’t know what to answer. He didn’t plan on telling Tony what had happened with James. He hadn’t thought of how he would react if he learned it.

« You didn’t lie about being clean at least, did you? »

That hurt, but Steve guessed it was fair enough. He didn’t answer, he just shook his head in a ‘no.’

 

Steve left James’ apartment thinking he was an asshole too. He had used James the same way Tony had used him. He wondered if Tony felt the same way when he was done with him.

 

…

 

 

Steve went back to the Tower, dirty and full of James’s come . He rushed out to his room and took the longest shower he had ever had. He wanted to get rid of everything about James. Not that he had hated it. He was just terribly terribly guilty. He didn’t want.. he _couldn’t have_ Tony to know.

 

He changed into clean clothes and went to bed. He couldn’t sleep. He was too restless. He was excited to tell Tony about his feelings but he was also scared and guilty and didn’t know how he would be able to face him.

 

The next day Steve went out for his usual running session. When he came back, Jarvis opened the elevator’s door in front of Tony’s suite.

 

Steve came in still sweaty from the effort. Tony had ordered breakfast for him, a healthy one, just how he usually took it. Steve felt extremely happy about that. Tony cared about him, he knew it somehow. He just didn’t know how to express it maybe, just as he hadn’t been able to express himself. He was smiling. He looked around for Tony. He wanted to see him. He brought both his hands on his belly and fondled the warmth there. His heart beat fast. He was excited and scared at the same time. He wanted to tell him. He was going to tell him. He wanted to tell him he loved him and that he wanted to be with him. Properly. As lovers. As mates. Real mates.

 

Tony’s voice echoed from the corridor.

 

« Captain perfect! Came back from running already? Look, I ordered your favorite, I hope you li— »

 

The voice stopped in the middle of the sentence, as Tony came in the main room. He looked at Steve with a questioning look on his face and then he came to him and sniffed his neck. He stepped back quickly and looked at Steve with disgust.

 

« You reek of alpha. »

 

Tony had smelt it. Tony had scented James on him. Steve didn’t have any excuse. He looked at Tony apologetically. 

 

« Tony… » 

 

« YOU FUCKING SLUT!! » Tony shouted with rage.

 

« Tony, I’m sorry… »

 

Steve didn’t see the first slap coming to his face and didn’t dodge the second. He thought he had deserved it. He didn’t know if he was more hurt by the slapping or the look of disgust in Tony’s eyes.

 

« And here I was worrying myself over the way I treated you when you were out there, getting your ass done by other alphas like a cheap whore. Had I known you were such a slut I would have had so much more fun with you. » Tony looked angry but he was chuckling bitterly.

 

Steve felt tears coming to his eyes. He was standing up, his hand protecting his belly, getting all Tony’s insults thrown at his face, trying to keep his dignity. He was thinking he deserved it, but it hurt. 

 

« I’m really sorry Tony, I thought you didn’t want me.. »

 

« DON'T YOU DARE PUT THIS ON ME! » Tony was fuming, enraged. « YOU DISGUST ME! Just like that FUCKING BREAKFAST! »

 

The breakfast ended up on the floor in a violence that Steve had never seen in Tony. He was scared, not for himself. He didn’t risk anything with the serum. He was scared for Tony. He couldn’t handle seeing him so enraged and so out of himself but guilt and shame paralyzed him. 

 

« Don’t just stand there with that pitiful look on your face. » Tony had said that like it was killing him and now he was laughing like a mad man. « I can’t stand it. Even now you look so perfect and judging. I can’t suffer you anymore. » His words got out as whispers. « Get out…  GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE! »

 

« Please Tony I’m sorry. Let’s just… »

 

« Get out. Get out of the Tower. I don’t wanna see your fucking face anymore. Pack your bags and GET. THE. FUCK. OUT. » Tony’s words distinctly came out of his mouth one after the  other in a cold and regular tone. They felt like daggers stabbing him. 

 

Steve was devastated. He had made one mistake. Just one. He wanted to explain himself. He wanted to tell Tony how sorry he was. He was just confused. It had been a lot for him. He had just discovered his sexuality, he had just discovered his feelings. It was all new to him. They didn’t stand on the same level. Tony should understand. He had years to get where he was. Steve only had a few months. Tony should let him explain. He knew he was wrong. He was sorry. He would never do this again. But Steve had no idea what it meant to disobey his alpha. 

Tony repudiated him. He broke the bond. Steve was thrown out of the Tower like dirt. Steve stood there unable to move, unable to say anything. He was just enough in control of his body to hold back his tears. 

 

« Okay. I’ll be gone by tonight. » He finally was able to say and he left the room.

 

He had ruined everything.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feel free to trash me in the comments.
> 
> NEXT TIME : Things are gonna be a little better. (cause they can't go worse, obviously...)


	24. Steve is trying to find peace and serenity.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve is getting bored alone in his new place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for your comments and kudos. It's really appreciated. ;-) Enjoy!

Steve had left the Tower only an hour after his fight with Tony. He didn’t have much to pack anyway. There was nothing that was his. He just took some clothes, the very first he had when he came here. He left his tablet and computer. What was the point? They were all Stark Industry made. Tony would use them to control him. Or maybe he wouldn’t, why would he try to control or spy on him? He didn’t deserve being wasted time on. Especially not Tony’s time. The real reason was probably him wanting to forget about Tony or being a bit proud. He didn’t take his arts supplies either. It reminded him of the room in Tony’s apartments. He only took his sketch book after he torn off all his drawings of Tony and threw them away.

He hesitated before taking his phone. Stark made too. But then he still wanted to be able to join his friends. He left without even saying goodbye.

 

The first thing he did was calling Nick Fury. There was something really important he needed to discuss now. What about the team? He didn’t think Tony would be able to work beside him now. What he had done was too much. Also maybe, _he_ wasn’t sure that _he_ could work beside Tony either. So what was going to happen with the team? Who was going to be out. He couldn’t leave the team. He was the captain. There was no team without him. But then, could he stop Tony from being in the team? As far as he knew, Tony was impossible to restrict. They had never been able to make him stand back. Tony always did what he wanted. He was uncontrolled. 

 

They decided, in a common agreement, it was better for Steve to back off for a while. Tony wouldn’t. Steve would go to stealthy missions on his own but he would be dismissed from general avengers interventions. Steve was the mature one despite his younger age and it was for him the opportunity to get his thought straight, take some time for himself.

He had lost everything. His job, his friends, his home… and Tony.

 

Fury had found him a place to stay. He could stay there until he finds better, maybe somewhere a little bit more personal. 

 

Steve wanted to discuss the thing with Fury, as a fellow omega, have his opinion. Would he be able to find a mate again, even if he had been repudiated? Did he think Tony could ever forgive him? Would they be able to talk again?

 

He didn’t seem to think it was such a big deal. People were breaking their bonds all the time. Shit happened. Steve and Tony were too extreme. Of course it was pretty bad for omega to disobey alpha but it was not punishable by death either. Tony would come around eventually. Steve should stop making a fuss about the whole thing. This was not the only thing in his life. He had so much more. Steve should learn how to deal with being omega, being a mate and living his life as an avenger. All these things were not incompatible if Steve stopped focusing all his mind on only one of them. He needed to find balance and serenity.

 

Steve had a lot a time on his hand to find balance and serenity. He was all alone in a shit-hole apartment. His friends had called but he didn’t answer any of them. He wasn’t ready. He spent his days going at the gym down the street and studying SHIELD files. 

 

After two weeks Steve answered Natasha’s hundredth call. He missed her. He missed all of them terribly.  Steve was on his bed, his hand on his belly, touching unconsciously. He brought the phone to his ear.

 

« Steve? » Natasha’s relieved voice said over the phone. « I’ve been trying to call you for weeks. Where are you? What have you been doing? I’ve been worried sick. We all are. What happened? »

 

« Nothing. Fury has given me some work to do. »

 

« Where are you? Why did you leave home? Are you on a mission? Fury doesn’t wanna tell us anything. We miss you. »

 

« What did Tony tell you? »

 

« Nothing. We only saw Iron Man. Tony has been hiding in his workshop. Did something happen with Tony? »

 

« I left the Tower, Nat. »

 

« What? Why? »

 

« Tony kicked me out… »

 

« He WHAT? He CAN’T DO THAT! I’m gonna talk to him. He has no RIGHT! »

 

« He can totally do that. He has every right. It is _his_ tower. It is _his_ pack. He has repudiated me. »

 

« Repudiated you? Oh my god. Why? Did you tell him? Did you tell him you wanted to break the bond? Even so, that’s a bit far gone. I know he can be extreme but… »

 

« No, I didn’t. It’s not that… »

 

« Then Why? Why would he do something like that? What has he done? »

 

« He… He hasn’t done anything, Nat. » 

 

Steve was ashamed. Of course his friends would assume the worst of Tony and not of him. He was remorseful. He didn’t want to tell her but at the same time he didn’t want Tony to be wrongly accused.

 

« Steve… There’s nothing that justifies throwing you out of the Tower. He has no right. »

 

« Actually, there is. You don’t know what happened. »

 

« Steve… What did you do? »

 

Steve paused and finally answered.

 

« I had sex with James. »

 

« WHAT??? Who? James? _The_ James? The one you kissed in a bar? »

 

« Yeah. That James. »

 

« Oh honey, I’m really sorry. I don’t understand. Why didn’t you talk to me? »

 

« I knew you’d disapprove. »

 

« I don’t necessarily disapprove. If you were unhappy… It would have been better if you had talked to Tony before but it doesn’t change anything now… You should have talked to _us_. We could have helped. Please, don’t do that anymore. Don’t suffer on your own… »

 

« Thanks Nat, Thank you for understanding. »

 

« It’s okay. So what now? Are you and James together? »

 

« No. »

 

« Why? »

 

« I don’t want James… »

 

There was an awkward silence in which Steve didn’t want to tell more and Natasha didn’t try to pry any further. Then Natasha spoke again. 

 

« I’ll talk to Tony. You need to come back. This is your home. Whatever happened between the two of you, I’m sure both of you have your share of wrongs. Your place is here with us. With your friends, with the Avengers. »

 

Natasha extorted his address out of him on the condition that she wouldn’t come to see him, nor any other of his friends. They could call if they wanted but he wished for a little bit of peace and quiet.

 

…

 

 

Steve was watching some TV. Nothing interesting but he needed to clear his thoughts. He stood up and went to the fridge. He was hungry, he took out a pot of yogurt and came back to the couch. It wasn’t in his habits to eat at night, that wasn’t healthy, but he always needed to eat lately. He thought it was probably because he was bored and missed the lively atmosphere of the Tower.

 

As he was zapping the channels, someone knocked on his door. He sighed. He had specifically said he didn’t want any visit. His friends had only lasted a week, he didn’t mind that much. He craved for company. The only reason he didn’t want to see his friends was because he felt shitty. He was ashamed and he felt guilty and ungrateful. He didn’t want to see disappointment in their eyes.

 

He stood up and came to the door. When he opened, he saw a fist which was about to knock again. It didn’t took him long to open but the owner of that hand was the impatient type. _Tony_. What was he doing here? Steve stared at him his eyes wide open. Tony was the last person he imagined to find on his doorstep. He felt his heart heave in his chest when he saw the dark alpha eyes staring, but Tony quickly looked away.

 

« What’s this shit-hole? » He said as he barged in without waiting for Steve to invite him in. Tony was like that. Intrusive. 

 

« Hum… Hello? » Steve had his heart beating fast, he couldn’t think. He felt his body quiver and his chest squeezing.

 

« Captain! » Tony said and he was looking around, scanning everything like he was going to buy the place.

 

« So.. Take your stuff. We’re going. » He added before Steve even had the time to say anything.

 

« What? Where? » 

 

« You’re coming back to the Tower. »

 

« Huh? »

 

« There’s no ‘huh’. Don’t ‘huh’ me. You’re coming back. »

 

« Tony, I can’t. »

 

« Of course you can. What are you saying? »

 

« Tony.  I’m really sorry. »

 

« Please don’t say anything. I don’t wanna hear it. I’ve come to pick you up. Not to listen to your excuses… »

 

« Tony, please… I can’t just pretend— »

 

« I can. I totally can. Let’s pretend the last few months didn't happen. You come back to the Tower. You come back to the team. And everything’s back to normal. Right? Great! Amazing! Let’s go. »

 

« Did Natasha put you up to this? »

 

« She can be very persuasive. »

 

« Tony, I’m not coming back. »

 

« Why not? You can’t do that, otherwise the Black Widow will attack me in my sleep and seriously you know how scary she can be, right? I need protection. _I need you_ … to protect me from her… »

 

« Tony I’m serious. I can’t go back. Not without having a discussion. We need to talk. I won’t be able to live in the Tower and work with you again if we don’t settle a few things first. »

 

Steve was proud to be able to stand to Tony. He was being himself again. He was being mature, something he hadn’t been for the past few months, even if he was heart-broken.

 

Tony deflated and sighed.

 

« What do you want to talk about? »

 

« Tony I’m sorry. »

 

« Yeah. You said that. »

 

« I mean. You have to understand. It was hard for me. You were… You weren’t kind to me. »

 

« I know. I’m sorry. » 

 

« It’s just… I was so frustrated…. It was a mistake. »

 

« Yeah…Right. »

 

« Tony, it didn’t mean anything I swear. »

 

« Yeah sure… »

 

« I swear it was just one time. I won’t see him again… »

 

« No, you won’t. You definitely won’t. »

 

Steve heart beat faster. He suddenly remembered how James was scared about his alpha finding out. 

 

« What are you saying? … Tony… You didn’t… »

 

« Don’t worry. He’s still alive. I was a good person. It took a lot of self-control but I did it. »

 

Steve’s face paled. He was suddenly frightened. 

 

« What did you do? »

 

« Nothing. Just scared him off a bit. I didn’t even try to make him leave the country. You should be proud. »

 

« Tony…. » Tony’s name faded in Steve’s terrified sigh.

 

« Sorry Captain. I had to do something. I can’t let another alpha take what’s mine. Well, what _was_ mine. Don’t worry, I was civilized. I didn’t even hurt him. »

 

Steve felt relieved about James but also terribly terribly guilty. He had provoked this. He had led James in this situation. It was all his fault. And he even had promised he would never let anything happen to him. He had failed James, just as he had failed Tony.

 

« I’m really sorry… » 

 

« No. You’re not. »

 

« I swear. He doesn’t mean anything to me. »

 

« Yes he does. Don’t bother. I saw everything. I listened to all of your conversations. I read all your texts. You know, the part when you said: ‘I don’t have a boyfriend anymore.’ Or the one when you said: ‘I wanna be in your bed too.’ Or maybe you want me to quote you a little bit more? »

 

Steve looked down in shame and regrets. He had said that. He had done all that and he had done it under Jarvis surveillance. Of course Tony had looked at the footage. He had nothing to say for himself.

 

« Yeah. That’s what I thought… Let’s say it’s my fault, okay? I was the older one. The more experienced one. I led you on. I took advantage of you. Bad move. 

You and I. Should have never happened. Sorry about that. Should have had more self-control. Should have been the mature one. Let’s forget that you and I ever happened. I still respect you as a teammate, as our Captain. Come back to the Tower. That’s stupid. Saving the world is far more important than a little mates’ quarrel. There’s more at stake than my honor or your ego. Don’t you think? »

 

« I’m really sorry. Tony. »

 

« The next time you say that I swear I’m gonna punch you. I’ll break my hand but it will feel so good! »

 

« Sor… Okay. »

 

« Yeah. Okay. Pack your bags. »

 

« Hum… I’ll think about it. »

 

« I won’t move until you leave with me. »

 

« Tony, I need more time. »

 

« I’m not hearing it. »

 

« Tony! »

 

« Pack your bags. »

 

« Tony you’re annoying. You can’t control everything. »

 

« I can’t but I can control you. You’re pack. I decide what’s best for my pack. »

 

« You just said… »

 

« I just said you must be Captain America again and I’ll let you live your life, I never said you could just live anywhere. »

 

Tony was at least as stubborn as Steve was and alpha and that was probably a lie that Steve couldn’t say no to him. It was probably that he actually wanted to go back so much. It was probably him unconsciously being happy about Tony’s insistence. But Steve couldn’t resist the power of Alpha ordering him. He packed his bags in a hurry and let Tony take him back to the Tower. To his friends. There, he was in his room again. Nothing had changed. Nothing had moved. 

He fell down on his bed in a sigh and put his hand on his belly protectively. What was gonna happen to him now? What was gonna happen with Tony?

 

He didn’t have much time to think about it because already Natasha and Clint came uninvited, then Bruce. Thor organized a welcome back party. He had been staying there for a few days. He was helping out since Steve had gone. The party lasted most of the night and everybody ended up drinking a little more than reasonable. Except him of course, what was the point? Never mind, he was happy to forget everything during one night at least. Sam was there too. He was happy to see him. It had been a while. And Tony had stayed, he had even invited Rhodey and Pepper. It felt so warm and so cheering up. Just one night where he was just Steve, their captain, their friend.

 


	25. Learning to be omega

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Someone new comes to live in the Tower (and not everybody is happy about it.)

Steve woke up early and felt sick. He had spent his first night in his bed back at the Tower and it had been a short one. Already three weeks had gone by since their fight with Tony. And just yesterday, Tony had forced him to come home.

He went out for his usual run but was really out of it. He ran only half far as he usually went to. His heart was beating much too fast for a simple run. He was tired. _How_ _unusual…_ Steve was rarely tired. Last night had been a long and hectic night but nothing he couldn’t handle. But Steve felt exhausted, emotionally exhausted. He headed directly toward his room and decided to skip breakfast. Something he never did. He wasn’t ready to go back to his old habits like nothing had happened. 

When he came down to the common room, around 9:30 a.m, he saw his friends trying to get over a hangover. 

 

Clint was lying on the couch, his hand on his head. Natasha was staring at the fizzing glass of ibuprofen water in front of her. Thor was still sleeping on the other side of the couch. Bruce was reading the newspaper, tea in hand, fresh like the morning dew. He must have been more reasonable than the others, or maybe he held his liquor better. He smiled kindly at Steve. 

 

Steve was starving, he could have eaten three times his usual portion. He started cooking which made everyone shout at him. Their damaged stomachs were not doing great with the smell of food grilling. 

 

He made himself a healthy omelet and a smoothie while the others looked at him as if they were going to throw up. He was glad to be back here and show them how to take care of their bodies. He was the one who vouched for healthy behavior and good manners. He had to set a good example. It finally felt like home again.

 

The day went by without any problem. No emergency. Better that way. Steve could slowly go back to who he was. 

 

…

 

« Steve, are you okay? » Natasha inquired.

 

« Yes, why? »

 

« You’re crying… »

 

Steve was watching a documentary about the reproduction of dolphins. He was sitting cross-legged on the couch with a cushion on his lap, staring at the screen with tears dripping down his cheeks and a box of tissue in front of him. All tensed and focused.

 

« Am I? »

 

« What’s wrong?  Did something happen with Tony? »

 

« No. I haven’t seen him in like four days. »

 

« Then, why are you crying? »

 

« I’m not cry…. I don’t know. »

 

« Is this about the baby dolphins? » Natasha smiled teasingly. « You so sensitive, that’s really cute. »

 

Steve felt really emotional lately. He thought he was maybe a bit depressed about not being with Tony anymore. He didn’t really miss him, he thought. He couldn’t really, miss him, because he never really had him… okay, he missed him like _crazy_. 

 

…

 

 

 

The alarm went off. Steve got up too quickly. He felt dizzy. It was only 4:22a.m. He went to bathroom to throw up before he left for the avengers lockers and put on his suit. There was an explosion in Manhattan and they were asked to help with evacuating the civilians. There was a building that threatened to collapse entirely. The whole team bustled about around it. He didn’t feel well. The smoke was making him sick again. He couldn’t breathe. He brought his hand to his belly and held it there as a protection for a while as he was catching his breathe again. He really was out of it today. He shook his pain off and continued his task until everyone was safe and secure. When they were done he threw up again.

 

After 3 hours, all the civilians were put to safety. The building was secure. Iron Man was speaking with the firemen. Steve was exhausted. He was leaning against a wall, almost ready to pass out.

He had been often sick lately and tired. He was worried. What if something was wrong with the serum? He wanted to ask Bruce about it but he didn’t dare. What if the serum was not working anymore? Would he go back to how he was before? Would he have asthma again? He would never be able to do his job with his former body no matter how stubborn and brave he was. Steve didn’t want to know. He had had too many bad news recently.

 

 

…

 

 

The whole week had been crazy. There had been alien attacks everyday. Steve was glad Thor was still here because it had been very difficult to handle. The avengers had been on the alert 24/7 and the fights had been rough but they had finally managed to contain the threat. It was a huge relief. 

Steve was exhausted but he felt restless. He was still dealing with post-stress adrenaline and couldn’t calm down. His stomach hurt. He had taken bad blows and was unusually hurting. He put his hand on his belly to soothe the pain and pressed the warmth on his skin. He wanted to cry. He held back tears and tried to smile and join the others in their small celebration of the end of the hostilities. Steve wasn’t thirsty, he wasn’t hungry, he was feeling weird and had a weird taste in his mouth. He came to bed early and tried to calm himself down by drawing. After two hours he realized that once again, he had only made sketches of Tony or Iron Man.

Steve didn’t feel well. He needed to see Bruce. He would go and see him tomorrow. He had to know. He had to know the truth. He couldn't ignore the problem anymore.

 

After a small night he woke up and ran to the bathroom to vomit. That was it. He was going to see Bruce today. He should be a grown-up about it and face his deepest fear.

 

 

« Cap? What’s wrong? »

 

« I don’t know. I feel really strange lately. I’m tired all the time. My body hurts everywhere. I’m sick all day. I’m hungry all night. I can’t sleep. I’m scared the serum doesn’t work anymore. Do you think I’m gonna have asthma again? Bruce. I’m really scared. I— »

 

« Woh. Slow down, Cap. I really doubt the serum isn’t working anymore. Look at your body, you already healed. Can you repeat the symptoms more slowly please? »

 

Steve repeated the symptoms one after the other in a slow monotone voice while a smile was widening on Bruce’s face.

 

« Steve. The serum is working fine. Really. This has nothing to do with the serum. »

 

« What? What is it then? Do you think it’s psychological? Do you think that I’m imagining it? Am I having a mental breakdown? »

 

« I never said that. »

 

« What is it then? There must be something. »

 

« Oh yes, there’s something. There’s definitely something. »

 

« What? Can you tell? What’s wrong? Is it serious? »

 

« Well. It depends. »

 

« What do you mean it depends? Is it serious or not? »

 

« Calm down Cap! There isn’t anyone in danger here. When was the last time you had your heat?  

 

Steve was startled. Why was Bruce asking about his heat? He tried to remember. During his last heat he was with Tony. It had been like two months ago.

 

« What’s that gotta do with anything? »

 

« Well, if my intuition is good. It’s gotta do with everything. »

 

« What do you mean? »

 

« Steve, Answer my question. »

 

« I don’t know. Maybe two months or something. »

 

« Yeah. That’s what I thought… »

 

« What? »

 

« You’re pregnant. »

 

Steve jaw dropped. He froze. This was _not_ happening. This _couldn’t_ be happening. This couldn't be _possible_. He tried to speak but he was petrified. His world was collapsing around him. _This couldn’t have been worse._

Bruce put his hands on his arms in a warm comforting embrace and looked at Steve with empathy. 

 

« I don’t understand. » Steve finally managed to say.

 

« Well that’s pretty simple. You’re pregnant. You've got a baby inside. You’ve got all the symptoms. I can’t say it’s 100% sure, yet, but I’m pretty certain. I’ll know for sure as soon as I run the tests. »

 

« How? How is that even possible? You said… You said I couldn’t with the serum? »

 

« I said I doubted it. But hey, Miracles happen. And if you want my opinion, this one is a pretty tough miracle. After everything you’ve put it through lately. This is amazing you didn’t lose it. »

 

« I can’t be pregnant Bruce. That’s not possible. How am I gonna do? »

 

« Hey. Captain, you’ll do fine. »

 

« I can’t do this. I’m not doing this. Why is this happening to me? »

 

« Well, Did you use protection like I told you to ? »

 

« You said… »

 

« Well, I’m not gonna sermon you about getting protection during sex right now, it’s a bit too late but I did warn you about it. I’m just… I’m just surprised that Tony didn’t think about it. He has avoided getting anyone pregnant for more than 20 years. I thought he would have been more cautious… »

 

« Oh my God! Tony…  This is a disaster. He can’t ever know. »

 

« He will know. It’s too early now but he’s going to smell it on you soon enough. And you can’t not tell him, Steve. You’re gonna have to tell him. He _is_ the father, right?  I mean… It is Tony’s, right? »

 

« How can you even ask me that? If there ever was any baby, of course it would be Tony’s. Who do you take me for? »

 

« I’m sorry Steve but I reckon you had sex with someone else. »

 

« Not during my heat. »

 

« Well, sometimes you can get pregnant outside of your heat. That’s pretty rare but… it happens. You didn’t have any unprotected sex with someone other than Tony, right? »

 

Steve’s face was livid. Bruce could probably read the panic in his eyes. He didn’t even have to wait for Steve’s answer.

 

« Oh, Steve. Tell me you didn’t. »

 

« We didn’t knot… »

 

Bruce looked at him with pity and worry. 

 

« Knotting is definitely increasing the chances to get pregnant, but it is _not_ a necessary thing. »

 

Steve felt a lump in his throat and a knot in his stomach, he was about to throw up again.

 

« Okay. Cap, calm down. Let’s not jump on conclusions okay. I’m gonna take some blood samples and run some test. I’ll be able to confirm this and tell you how long you’ve been pregnant. Go and take some rest. What you’ve been doing lately is really bad for the baby. »

 

…

 

Steve went to his room and didn’t get out for the rest of the day. His heart and mind were all over the place. This was a real shock. A huge shock. A baby. What? How? This could not be happening to him. It must be a joke. It must be a dream again. He couldn't have a baby. What would he do? How could he do it? There must be another solution. He could not afford to have a child, especially not now. How would he continue his job? And the father? It was already very bad that he might be carrying Tony’s baby. What if it was James’s ? Steve would never ever forgive himself. He couldn’t have this baby. He couldn’t. 

 

Bruce came with the test results. 

 

« When did you have sex with the other guy? »

 

Steve looked at him, a shameful expression on his face, he was hesitating.

 

« Look, I’m gonna need to know at some point if you wanna know who the other father is. »

 

Steve went white. The worst had happened. He _was_ pregnant. He had stupidly hoped that Bruce would be mistaken, which was pretty pointless when deep inside he knew it was true. He should have realized it earlier. It made so much sense right now. Steve could almost feel the baby inside of him now. His hands automatically came to his belly and stroked protectively. When he noticed he forced his hands away and pouted with disgust. He was not going to get attached. He was not going to have this baby. This was not a baby. This was an intruder. 

 

« I’m sorry Steve. You _are_ pregnant. You are 9 weeks pregnant. » Bruce tried to be kind and sympathetic.

 

Steve got pregnant during his heat. It _was_ Tony’s. He didn’t really know if it was good news or not. How would Tony react? Would he—?

 

« Cap? »

 

« Sorry Bruce, my mind was elsewhere. I… I had sex with James about three weeks after my last heat. »

 

« It _is_ Tony’s then. »

 

« Yes. »

 

« You have to tell him. »

 

« I don’t. I’m not telling Tony. There’s no baby. I’m not having Tony’s baby. »

 

« Steve. You’re not serious are you? »

 

« I’m dead serious. I’m not having this baby. There must be another way. »

 

« You’re not seriously thinking about getting an abortion? »

 

« I can’t possibly tell Tony about this, can I? He’s gonna be furious. »

"Well you did cheat on your alpha while you were pregnant with his child. You’re not in a very good position. That’s for sure. Even if things have changed nowadays, not many alphas could take this news without going berserk but you’re gonna have to tell him. You can’t possibly do this behind his back. »

 

« Tony doesn’t want a mate, let alone a baby. He wouldn’t want it. He’d ask me to get rid of it. »

 

« You don’t know that. And even if he did, it is also your baby. _You_ are carrying it. Nobody can force you to get rid of it. »

 

« Nobody is forcing me. I want to get rid of it, as soon as possible. I don’t want this baby. I don’t want to have a child. »

 

« Cap. You’re in shock. Let’s talk about it when you’ve come around the news. I know this is scary but please, don’t think about getting an abortion. There are other solutions. You can have this baby and if you do, you will have our full support. We would all be parents to him or her. You would not be on your own. »

 

« Don’t say him or her. It makes it real. »

 

« It _is_ real Steve. It’s pretty real. »

 

Steve felt tears rolling down his cheeks. It was pretty real, indeed, and pretty fucked-up and really terrifying. 

 

Steve was not ready for this. He was only just beginning to accept his being omega. 

 

« You need to tell Tony about this. You have to tell him, Steve. It’s too important. If you don’t tell him, I will. And I can assure you that you’d rather have him learning it from you than from someone else. »

 

« Thanks for your support » Steve said ironically.

 

« Don’t be like that. I support you. You know I do and I will. We all do. »

 

« I want to get rid of it. »

 

« Well. I won’t stop you from doing it, if this is really what you want, but I must tell you that I strongly disapprove. You can have this baby Steve. You’re not on your own. »

 

« We’ll see about that. »

 

…

 

Steve’s hands were on his belly and his fingers were unconsciously brushing it with affection. He was acknowledging the living thing slowly growing inside. It was living. It was human. It was a baby. It was his son or his daughter. It was _Tony’s_ son or daughter. 

 

Steve couldn’t raise a child. It was insane and irresponsible. He didn’t have any time for a child, and his job was far too dangerous. He had no idea how to do it. He had always imagined he would have an nice omega who would take care of his progeny for him. He would have never thought that _he_ would be the nice omega who had to care for his progeny. He wasn’t prepared. … And what about Tony? Would he acknowledge it? Would he want to be part of its life?

 

Bruce was right. He couldn’t get rid of it. This was so wrong. It was like killing an innocent being. He, Captain America, could absolutely not resort to abortion. It would be too hypocritical. It would go against all his principles. The young and determined Steve Rogers, the one who had shown an admirable heart, an exemplary courage. The one who had been worthy enough to deserve the serum. That Steve Rogers would have disapproved too. He wouldn’t even have thought about it in the first place. That Steve Rogers would have despised him for even considering it. 

And yet, he wanted it out of his body as soon as possible.

 

He told Natasha. She hugged him tightly. She was very excited to the thought of having a child in the house. It would bring so much joy and happiness (but they would have to soundproof Steve’s room because she would not be patient). She would help, she would definitely help (as long as nobody asked her to change diapers.) She would support him no matter what but he had to tell Tony.

 

…

 

 

There had been a slow few days and Steve had had a lot of time on his hands to think about the intruder. He was trying to consider keeping it. His body was ready, he felt connected. His hands were always fondling his growing bump and automatically a stupid grin would show on his face. He already loved this baby. He loved it with all his soul, but his mind was fighting it. He was scared, terrified. He had no idea how to deal with this. He had no idea how to lead his life from now on. He didn’t want his life to change. He wasn’t ready to be responsible for another being. And he was scared of _Tony_. He still hadn’t told him. He hadn’t told anyone else. Only Bruce and Natasha knew.

 

Bruce asked him over for some tests. He was going to have his first ultrasound. Bruce made him lie down and put cold gel on his skin. Steve wasn’t saying anything. He didn’t want to be here. He didn’t want to see it. He didn’t want to love it. Bruce smiled fondly.

 

« You’re already showing. »

 

Steve looked at his belly. He was showing. He was so fit that 10 weeks of pregnancy was clearly visible on his tight and chiseled abs. He stared at it in surprise.

 

« How are you feeling? » Bruce asked kindly.

 

« Not well. »

 

« You still haven’t told Tony? »

 

« I haven’t. »

 

« You have to tell him. If you don’t I’ll do it, within two days, I will. »

 

« I’m gonna get rid of it no matter what he says. »

 

« You don’t really mean that, do you? »

 

« I do. Are you gonna stop me? » That was half a lie. Steve was trying to convince himself he wasn’t going to keep it but there was a growing part of him that already treasured it.

 

« I’ll try. I’ll do everything I can to convince you not to do it. »

 

« I thought you’d be more understanding. A good friend would try to comprehend. »

 

« A good friend should tell you when you’re going to do the biggest mistake of your life. This is not you, Cap. The Steve I know would not speak like that. »

 

Bruce rubbed the transducer on Steve’s belly and Steve heard it. He heard his baby’s heart beat. His heart skipped and he awed in surprise.

 

« It’s impressive isn’t it? So small and so alive at the same time. »

 

Steve didn’t want to look. He didn’t want to see. He would never be able to go through with the abortion if he saw. 

 

« Look! Look how small and cute it is. We can already see its head. Look at the little arms and legs. »

 

Steve looked, his body flinched, his heart was beating fast. He stared in awe. He was going to be a father. He had a baby inside. Steve felt tears running down. How could he ever decide to get rid of this. It was so precious. 

 

 

Steve decided to tell Tony. He was in the elevator, looking at the ultrasound picture with a wide smile on his face. His free hand fondling his bump, consciously this time. Very consciously. Steve felt warm and happy. 

 

« Jarvis? »

 

« Sir? »

 

« Is Tony in his room? »

 

« Yes, Mr Stark is currently having a shower. »

 

« Can you take me there? »

 

« Of course, Captain. »

 

« Thank you Jarvis. »

 

The elevator’s door opened and Steve stopped in front of the door, hesitating. Then he held his hand up to knock but the door opened before he could. 

 

« You can go in Mr Rogers. Mr Stark is aware of your visit. »

 

Steve waited for a few seconds before entering the room. He looked around and didn’t see anyone. Then he heard steps coming from the corridor. Tony was coming, still wet, with only a towel hiding his nudity.

 

« Rogers. »

 

Tony was looking at him intensely. Steve felt surrounded by alpha scent. He could sense his power and felt overwhelmed again. He was staring at the man. His body dripping wet and and his hair all wet and messy. He was so handsome. Steve had forgotten how handsome Tony was. He was so shaken up by the power that he had forgotten how beautiful and attractive he was. Steve’s heart  squeezed. He loved him. He loved him with all his heart, with all his soul. He was carrying his baby.

 

« We haven’t talked since I came back. » Steve started.

 

« What do you want? »

 

« I need to tell you something. »

 

« Can you give me a minute? »

 

« Sorry, yes. »

 

Tony came back wearing casual clothes and Steve was amazed again. He wanted to be at his feet and let Tony stroke his head but he couldn’t. They weren’t mates anymore. Tony had broken the bond. He had repudiated him. Steve had cheated.

 

« So… is there something wrong? Is it the aliens? »

 

« It’s not about the Avengers. »

 

« Then, I think we already told each other everything. »

 

« We haven’t. »

 

« Not sure I wanna listen… If this is about you being sorry again, I don’t wanna hear it. »

 

« It’s not that! » Steve bit his lips trying to tell the truth. He delicately touched the picture in his hand to give himself some courage.

 

« What it is then? »

 

« I’m pregnant. »

 

Tony’s face became pale and distraught. His eyes were wide open. Then his expression rapidly changed from surprise, to fear and then to anger.

 

« You are _what_? »

 

« I’m 10 weeks pregnant, Tony. »

 

« Is it mine? »

 

Steve was pained at the question. How could Tony doubt him like that.

 

« Of course it’s yours. How can you say that? »

 

« You’ve been sleeping around, haven’t you? » 

 

Fair enough. Steve had cheated, but Tony knew exactly when and where and who with and how many times. He was a genius, he knew exactly that ten weeks ago Steve was with him. He had sequestrated him in this very same room, where he was standing, six feet away from Steve, looking at him with anger and disgust.

 

Steve didn’t answer. It was true, wasn’t it? Even if Tony was using this to hurt him right now, it didn’t make it any less true. He looked down in shame and regrets. Tony would make him pay for the rest of his life.

 

« How could you be so careless? How can you raise a child in these conditions? You don’t even have a mate. This was really irresponsible of you. » Tony’s tone was cold and heartless. He was unconcerned. Steve knew from this moment that he was alone.

 

« It’s yours, Tony. It’s your child. »

 

« YOU TOLD ME IT WAS SAFE!!! » Tony exploded. « How could you DO this to ME? Have you been planning this? I never thought you’d be that kind of omega… »

 

Steve raised his head in panic. Tony thought he had planned this, that he had deceived him. That he had _betrayed_ him.

 

« I’m not. I haven’t planned any of this. This came as a surprise for me too. »

 

« WHY did you TELL me it was SAFE? » Tony said enraged.

 

« I don’t know. I don’t know. I thought it was. I never thought— »

 

« You don’t KNOW? You NEVER THOUGHT? How could you be so CARELESS? Aren’t you taking the pill? »

 

« Hum… No… Bruce said, it wouldn’t work. »

 

« WHAT??? And you DIDN’T even care to TELL ME? How could you? You BEGGED me to be your MATE. You didn’t even THINK about TELLING ME about THIS? I don’t WANT a child. I NEVER WANTED a child… THIS is something we should have discussed TOGETHER. »

 

Steve couldn’t argue in his defense. He was taking all Tony’s accusation without flinching, but his heart was dying inside. 

 

« I’m so sorry, Tony. »

 

« You’re SORRY? You’ve RUINED my life and you’re SORRY? I can’t take anymore of your ‘sorrys’, Steve… Just go! … »

 

Steve held back his tears. He turned furiously and left the room. Now, he was sure. Tony didn’t want this baby. Tony didn’t want anything to do with him or his baby. He was alone. Steve suddenly hated that baby. He wanted it out of him immediately.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Damn, Tony is such an ass again... Won't be for too long though...
> 
> NEXT TIME: Finally, they will have THE talk... and I guess maybe... It's gonna be a little better between them.
> 
> Thanks for reading.


	26. Having a family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve and Tony have a long discussion and try to resolve most of their issues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NOTE 1: Thanks to the people who kindly gave me their opinion. I appreciate it a lot and it makes rethink my story and the hows and whys of each characters actions and opinions.
> 
> NOTE 2: This is not a lovey-dovey relationship and both characters are fucked up. If that was unclear before: it is not a story about transgender or about sexism or about abusive relationships. The story is biased and the events are seen through the eyes of a confused person who has been brought up in a different world at a different time and has to deal with his own shit. All characters have issues and opinions that are entitled to them.
> 
> NOTE 3 : WARNING! Self-harm and controlling stuff (physical and emotional control) in this chapter. The beginning may be upsetting, this is going to get a little bit better at the end.

Natasha had told Clint, who had told Thor, who told basically everyone. When he came down that night they all congratulated him. They were all cheering him and Steve burst into tears. Everybody was happy about the arrival of this child. Everybody except the only person that mattered to Steve. 

Natasha held him in her arms. 

 « He doesn’t want it, Nat. He doesn’t want _me_ … »

 She stroked his back kindly. 

 « It’s okay, honey. You don’t need him. You don’t need your mate. You have three alphas, a beta and a _god,_ to take care of you now. This child is going to be loved. It is going to have so much care and affection. Everything is going to be fine. »

 « I don’t want to keep it, Nat. I don’t want to have it. »

 « Oh Steve, don’t say something like that. You’re just upset. We’ll talk about it tomorrow, okay? »

Everybody came around them and hugged tightly. His friends were so understanding and supportive. They celebrated in the common room until late that night. Steve was too upset, too restless to be able to sleep. His friends stayed with him until he was exhausted enough to pass out. Tony hadn’t come to join them, not even for a minute.

 

…

 

Steve woke up in tears. His hands on his belly. What was he going to do now?

The alarm went on. Of course it would. It was the Avengers Tower. They wouldn’t be resting for ever. It had already been a miracle that they had enjoyed five days of peace and quiet. Steve stood up in a leap and rushed over the Avengers’ locker room, where his suit and shield were. The door wouldn’t open. 

« I’m sorry Sir, but your access to this room has been restricted. » Jarvis said. 

« Is this a joke? »

« I’m afraid not. » 

« Jarvis! Open the door. You can’t prevent me from going in. »

« I’m sorry sir. I’m not allowed to let you in. » 

« JARVIS!!! OPEN THE DOOR OR I’M GONNA BREAK IT. »

« Your access to this room is now forbidden, Sir. »

Steve enraged. He started to punch the reinforced door like a mad man. He punched and punched until the door was completely dented and his hands bloody. Despite the serum, he wasn’t strong enough to smash it open. After all, it was Stark made, especially designed to resist Hulk’s strength. Steve couldn’t be unhappy about it. This was keeping them safe. But right now, he hated Stark and the Stark Tower and everything Stark made more than anything.Steve went back to his room and put the most protective clothes he could find before he headed to the Quinjet’s landing where his teammates were all ready to leave. 

 « Where do you think you’re going? » The Iron Man’s voice inquired behind him.

« Doing my job. »

 « No you’re not. »

 « You can’t prevent me from doing my job. You can’t control me. I’m not yours. »

 « Actually, yes, I can. » 

« Who are you to give me orders? You have no rights. »

 « I’m your pack alpha, first of all. And you’re carrying _my_ child. Rights are irrelevant here. Right or not, I’ll use all my power to prevent you from going.  »

« I’m going to the battle whether you want it or not. You can’t tell me what to do!!! »

« Not in your condition, no. » 

Steve moved forward ignoring Tony’s banning. Iron Man flew over him and stopped him before he could reach the landing. The iron hands came to his arms and pressured to hold him still. Steve struggled and kicked and punched Iron Man in the face to release himself from the iron grip. Iron Man stumbled back and Steve looked at his friends asking them for help. Tony stood back up, seized Steve’s wrist firmly and flew him inside. Steve released himself again and ran back to the door before Jarvis could lock him inside. His teammates surrounded him and physically blocked the entrance. Steve looked at them dumbfounded. He was trying to read their thoughts in their eyes.

 « What?… I don’t understand. Why… »

« I’m sorry Steve. » Natasha said. 

« Tony’s right, Cap. You can’t come in your condition. » Clint added.

« You can’t be serious! I have been fighting aliens for a whole week and now you’re locking me up inside the Tower? »

« We are not locking you up and you’ve been damn well lucky. You can’t take anymore risks. It’s too dangerous for you. And the baby. » Bruce explained.

« Why are you siding with _him_? I thought you’d support _me_. Why are you betraying me? »

« We _are_ supportive, Steve. We’re not siding with anyone. We can’t let you take unnecessary risks. » Natasha answered.

« So this is it? I’m not an Avenger anymore? I’m not a person? I’m just a baby carrier? » 

« Don’t be ridiculous. This is not about you. This is about doing what is right. You’re putting yourself and your baby in danger. You won’t be able to fight the same way. Your pregnancy affects your ability to fight and command. Don’t be so immature and do the right thing. » Bruce said angrily. 

Steve had never seen him angry as he was always keeping himself in control to avoid hulking out. He dropped it. He couldn’t win against all of them. He finally resigned and went back inside while the rest of the team hurried to the Quinjet. They had an emergency to go to and they left Steve alone with his anger and sorrow.

He hated himself. He hated Tony. He hated that thing inside of him taking control over his body, his mind and his life. He felt so useless and depressed. He wanted the thing out of him. This was so unfair. Why was he omega? Why did he have to go through all of this?

 

...

 

Steve was restless, he was pacing around the floor of his room. He needed action. He needed to steam off some anger and frustration before he break something and hurt himself again.

He went down to the gym. He still had access to it. He almost felt grateful to Tony for letting him have this freedom and then he realized how unhealthy it was. He couldn’t be grateful to someone who was sequestrating him, controlling him and using him. 

He started punching the bags really hard, so hard he destroyed four of them. He punched and punched until his arms were sore too. He punched all his wrath, his frustration and his fear away. After two hours, he was left with his pain only. He collapsed on the floor and started sobbing. He was crying over his shitty life. It was so unfair. It was all because he was omega. It was all because of that thing inside. Tony was using that thing to control him, to imprison him. Steve started to feel so much hatred for that baby. He couldn’t let Tony use him that way. He fantasized about thrusting his hand in his womb, tear the thing out of him and smash it in his hand. He started punching his own belly. One blow, two blows, three blows. His punches were intensifying. It was hurting him already. His skin was all red.

Then there was noise and the door banged open. Steve barely saw the shiny red and golden strength taking control of his fists. Iron Man was holding his hands forcefully and pinning him down with the whole power of the armor.

« HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND? » The robotized voice shouted. « WHAT ARE YOU DOING? »

Tony pinned him down completely but Steve still tried to struggle to free himself like a crazy animal. He was enraged and crying.

« You can’t control me! You can’t tell me what to do! You can’t force me to keep this child! »

« This is _my_ child you’re carrying. _My baby_. And I’m gonna do _anything_ to protect it. I’ll protect it from anyone, and even from _you_. And If I have to lock you up in your room, and tie you down on your bed so you wouldn't hurt my baby, I will. Believe me. I wouldn’t like it but I’ll do it. I’ll do anything. Anything to protect my baby. Whether you agree or not. »

« I hate you. I FUCKING HATE YOU. » Steve cried out, letting all his anger and pain go.

Tony strengthened his grip and held him still, he waited until Steve was looking at him and lifted his faceplate. He stared in his eyes all silent and powerful and Steve felt overwhelmed and dominated by his alpha gaze. He was no longer master of his own movements.

« Are you listening to yourself, right now? » Tony asked calmly and coldly. « Look at yourself. You’re hysterical. You’re a mess. Where is the Steve Rogers I know? Where is the Steve Rogers that my father admired and spent his life trying to find? Get a grip on your life. Get a grip on yourself. Yes, you’re omega. Yes, you have heats. Yes, you have desires. And, Yes, you are pregnant. So what? Get over it!!! You hate it so much that you’re ready to kill an innocent unborn child, _my_ child? This is _not_ you. You’re not Captain America. He would be happy about having a family. He would do everything to protect an innocent baby. Where are you? You can’t continue on this destructive self-loathing trip you’re going to. _I’m_ the damaged one. You are the sane one, the mature, one. » Tony was staring in his eyes. Steve couldn’t escape his powerful gaze.

« This is not a baby. This is an intruder, an alien that is growing inside of me and controlling me. » Steve muttered, losing his conviction as he spoke.

He knew deep inside that all of them were right. And he was thankful for them that they had stopped him from going to battle but he still didn't want to admit it.

« You don’t mean that, I know you don’t. Stop the bullshit now. » Steve felt like Tony could read him like an open book, like he knew about him better than Steve himself. Steve had always felt that way about Tony.

Tony released his Iron grip and sat down next to Steve. He took off his armor while Steve calmed down and sat up. They didn’t look at each other. It was easier that way. There was no more pressure, no more violence, just the powerful aura of his alpha surrounding him, because Tony was his alpha. The alpha that constantly challenged him, unsettled him. The only alpha Steve wanted. The only alpha he was ready to submit to. 

He started panicking. He touched his sore abs, what if he had killed his baby? He put both his hands on his belly and tried to feel the heartbeat, as if he could… and he calmed down. His Alpha’s power calmed him down and something told him that everything was going to be alright. Steve felt safe again. He was where he belonged. 

« I don’t want it. » Steve started. This wasn’t true. This was never true. He loved that baby. He didn’t know how he was going to raise it but he already knew that he wouldn’t be able to live without this baby anymore. Maybe because he was that kind of person, or maybe because he was omega.

« Maybe you don’t. That’s sucks. You didn’t plan for this and that sucks too. I didn’t plan for it either… » Tony paused for a few seconds and continued.  « I admit I’m responsible for this mess. I should have been more cautious. Knowing you, I should have foreseen that you wouldn’t be prepared. I was careless too. I’m really sorry but that doesn’t change the facts: now this baby is here. …   And I’m gonna take care of it. I’m gonna raise this child with all my love. Please let me do this. » 

Steve listened, he couldn’t believing what he was hearing. Tony was taking responsibility for this baby.

 « You may not want this and that’s ok. I understand. You’re young and just discovered your sexuality. You wanna enjoy yourself. I get it. I’ve been there, done that… I’ve been selfish and stupid, I shouldn’t have kept you all to myself. You were not ready. I tried to force my feelings on you… »  

Steve was listening but didn’t understand, or maybe he didn’t want to understand. This Tony was not the Tony he knew. He had never imagined that this Tony could ever exist. 

« I’m almost forty, Steve. All this, the sex, the parties… it’s behind me now. I have found my family. It’s a noisy, scattered and carefree one but it’s the best one. The one who has accepted me with all my faults. Now I feel confident enough… This was so unexpected. I never thought about having a child before but now that it’s here I want it. I think I can do it and I want to do it. I want this child. I want this family. I know that you hate my guts but this is my last chance to have one. I’m not letting this go, Steve. I’m sorry but I’m not. I really wish I could do this with you but if I don’t, I won’t let you or anyone else ruin this for me—»

Tony’s eyes were sparkling as he was staring into space. He was almost smiling when he talked about their unborn child. There was something in his expression that Steve had never seen before. Something innocent, something bright and joyful, something like hope. Steve felt his hatred, his grudge ebb away.

« You’re saying that now, but just yesterday, you didn’t want anything to do with me, or the child. You don’t care about us. You don’t care about _me_. »

Tony turned to him, his expression shocked at the revelation. 

« What are you saying? Of course I care about you… I mean, yes, I acted shitty yesterday, I’m really sorry… But for Odin’s sake Steve, can you at least give me some time to process the news? You just dropped a bomb yesterday. I had to learn that you lied to me about taking contraceptives. You cheated on me while you were pregnant with my child. I think I’m allowed some time to swallow the pill, don’t you? I’m not like you. I’m not perfect, I’m not wise. I wish I could be as forgiving and as tolerant as you are but I’m not. I’m fucking not, man. That fucking _hurt_. I’m trying to do the right thing, the grown-up thing Steve, but that fucking _hurt_. So yeah, I was angry. I’m sorry. That was immature but I’m trying. I’m fucking trying. »

Steve listened and shivered with shame and regrets. He didn’t want to hear any of Tony’s justified reproaches. 

« How can we raise a child together when we hate each other? » He asked, scared about the uncertainty of this future. He wanted to know where he stood. He wanted to know if there was still some space for him in this family, but Tony didn’t understand the question this way.

« You don’t have to it if you don’t want to. Just do this for me, Steve. At least, carry my child for the seven months left and then you can do what you want… I know I can't force you to keep this child but I will. I'm asking you to consider it. Please accept to do this for me freely. »

Tony was asking something that was not an issue. Steve was never going to get rid of this baby but he could guess that he didn’t have the choice in this. Tony was controlling, so controlling that it scared him. Frankly, how could he say no to him? He didn’t want to be like that. He didn’t want to be helpless, unable to resist but he had to admit it. He couldn’t help it. Was it because he was omega? Was it because he was pregnant? Was it because it was supposed to be this way? Steve felt safe like this and the feeling of safety terrified him.

« Of course, I will. I can’t resist you anyway. » Steve said bitterly. « You won’t let me live my life. You won’t let me be me. I wish I could be free. I was free and now you control everything I do, everywhere I go. You must enjoy it so much… I’m just a puppet in your hands. Ever since I have my heats, I can’t do anything on my own free will. »

« Is this really how you feel? » Tony’s voice was feeble, almost a sigh. He sounded so hurt. 

Steve didn’t answer Tony’s question. It wasn’t really how he felt. Not all the time anyway. He was just scared, he wanted answers. He needed to let it all out. All the pain, the insecurities, the emotions that had built up this past few months. He had to if he wanted to be a parent hand in hand with Tony. He needed to know what Tony thought about him.

« Why do you hate me? What have I done for you to hate me that much? » Steve asked.

« I don’t _hate_ you. I _never_ hated you. _You’re_ the one who hates me. You’ve been hating me ever since we met. You despise everything I am. I could see the disappointment in you eyes, exactly the same disappointment I could read on my old man’s face.» 

This was not the answer Steve expected. He had no idea how Tony had felt. He had never imagined this. 

« I haven’t. You’re the one who started… » 

« You’re always getting on my case. Judging me, looking down on me from your pedestal, like I’m the shittiest thing you’ve met. I know I’m shit. I don’t need you to remind me every minutes of my life. »

« You’re always doing everything to annoy me on purpose, you never respect me. You’re always swearing. »

« What are you saying? I do respect you. I’ve always respected you. I was just teasing you… to get in your pants. »

 « That’s how you see me? As one of your numerous conquests? Another omega that you treat like shit, that you can use to relieve yourself and dump like an old rag? » 

This was not what he wanted to say. Deep inside Steve was happy to hear that Tony had been pining but he was too angry. Angry at Tony for never saying anything, angry at himself for never noticing. He just couldn’t express his emotions right. 

« I _never_ considered you as one of my ‘numerous conquests’. But here you are, judging again. What do you know about it anyway? Do you really think they were innocent in all this? How should I treat them when the only thing they are interested about is my money and my fame? Damn it! I just want someone who can love me for who I am, not what I represent. Is that too much to ask? »

 « Tony I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean it… I thought you _hated_ me…»

Steve turned his head to Tony and looked at him. He wanted to know. He wanted to read Tony’s feeling on his face, in his eyes. As if he could read his mind, Tony took Steve’s face in his hands and plunged his alpha eyes into his.

« Where the fuck did you get in your head that I hated you? I don’t hate you, Steve. » He paused. « I _love_ you… »  

Tony’s voice was angry but slow and controlled. Steve’s heart squeezed hard. This was a shock. He couldn’t believe those words. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. It was hurting so much.

 « Tony…? » Steve asked, delicately brushing Tony’s hands off his face.

Tony turned his face to escape Steve’s questioning eyes and stared at his feet.

« I’ve been meaning to tell you…. I know I’m fucked up and I don’t deserve you. I’m too damaged. I can’t deal with feelings, I destroy everything I touch, I’m a bad person…  but I love you. »

« I don’t understand… You’ve been rejecting me. Every time I came to you, you rejected me. You’ve been using me… Why? Why would you do something like that? »

Tony took his time to answer. He didn’t look at Steve, instead he sighed and Steve thought he could hear regrets in this sigh. Steve looked at him, waiting for an explanation.

« I’m so sorry » he started. « I know that you wanted something simple and casual and… I didn’t want casual. I wanted everything with you. I’ve been rejecting you because I didn’t want to get hurt. And believe me I tried…. I tried to resist you. But you were so… I knew you just wanted my dick… You have no idea how it hurts. How dead I felt inside every time you came to my bed. You were so honest with your body. I tried to avoid this, really. I tried but I couldn’t. You were so beautiful, so innocent, so provocative. Had to put some distance between us or I’d have gone crazy. »

 « This isn’t true. » 

 « What isn’t? »

 « You treated me like shit… »

« I did. I wanted this to end. I wanted to be free but then I was unable to resist having sex with you. Felt so good. So, I tried to push you away. I thought if I was awful enough you’d leave me…  In the end I hurt myself and I hurt you even more. I made you pay, took out my frustration on you. I used you for my own revenge. I’m not good with happiness but I’m a genius at fucking things up. I did push you away in the end… In the worst possible way… »

« Tony I’m sorry… »

« I know you are. You’re always sorry and the worst thing is that I _know_ that you mean it. I know it, but I also _know_ that I don't deserve your "sorries" _,_ deep inside, I’m the one responsible for everything you did, I should be the one who is sorry… But I’m not ready to accept it and forgive myself, nor to forgive you…»

 Steve felt tears running down his cheeks. Those words were worst than any blows he could get. Those words were killing him. Tony loved him and Tony suffered. And it was partly his fault. And he didn’t know if they could ever come back from this. 

 « Damn it Steve, Fuck. Don’t cry for fuck sake. I’m the worst asshole. I’m so angry with you, you know, I’m so angry right now, but if you cry you’re not playing fair. You’re breaking my heart. I know I don’t deserve anything from you. I feel like I’ve destroyed you. This is my fault you’ve lost yourself, damn it. Babe, please, come back to yourself. You _are_ beautiful. Everything about you is beautiful and amazing. You’re the best thing that happened to us, to this world. You’re the best thing that happened to _me_ … »

 Steve wiped the tears off his face and looked at Tony. His alpha took his hand and pressed warmly. 

 « I’m the shitty one, I’m the damaged one. » He said «You are not, you are good. You _are_ my savior. You can save me. With this baby, you can save me. Don’t let me be the one who destroyed you… I’m so sorry. Please forgive me. We can do this together. We can raise this baby. »

Tony was pouring his heart to him. Steve felt submerged by all these emotions. He didn’t know anything anymore. Who was the asshole in all of this? Steve had always felt that Tony was taking advantage of him because he was alpha and _he_ was omega. He had been so obsessed with being omega that he had been blind to everything else. 

« I’m sorry too, I should have talked to you, I regret so much everything I did. This was the biggest mistake of my life … I thought you were using me. »

«  _You_ were the one _using_ me. Damn it!  I felt like a human dildo. Never had sex so cold. The only thing I could have was your body. Made me so angry. I wanted to hurt you, just like you were hurting me. I wanted to _break_ you… »  Tony looked really sad but he was smirking. Steve realized it was his way of coping. His eyes were looking nostalgically in the air, full of regrets.

Steve felt a bit responsible for all this mess. Tony was the asshole but he felt as much of an asshole right now. He wasn’t able to convey his feelings. He had been stupid, and assuming, and judging and he had never tried to understand his mate. He thought as an omega he couldn’t do anything about his life and let everything happen to him. He was realizing now that he had been wrong all along. He was not inferior, he had his say in all this. He could decide. He could claim. He could get. He felt a confidence that he had never had before. He felt right in this body, he felt right in this situation. He felt confident in this role, in all this. He knew now what he was supposed to do, where he was supposed to be.

There was a pause when none of them talked but they were relaxing, releasing the tension. Steve felt overwhelmed by the power of his alpha again. He understood this feeling now, perfectly. Everything was meant to be. He was omega. Tony was alpha. He felt safe with Tony and Tony was going to take care of him. He was going to take care of Tony.

« I wanted to be your mate… » Steve said not looking at Tony.

 « Yeah, you wanted a mate to take care of your heats and your monstrous libido. I got that. »

 « No, I didn’t. I wanted you. I wanted everything from you. » This time Steve looked deeply into Tony’s eyes, trying to make him understand. He wanted to tell him. He wanted to convey everything.

 « You said I was ‘the most sensible choice for the team’. » Tony chuckled, a glimpse of sadness crossed his eyes.

 « That… That was an excuse. I didn’t know what I wanted. I didn’t know how to approach you. You’ve always impressed me and I’m not a seducer like you. I’ve never been good at that. I just… I wanted you to notice me. »

 « Notice you? Steve. Have you looked at yourself in a mirror? You the most gorgeous omega I’ve ever met. Any alpha would want to get you in their bed. »

 « I didn’t want any alpha, I just wanted you. »

Tony looked at him, incredulous. « I never realized… » he said, his voice heavy with pain. « I don’t deserve you. » he continued « I’m know I’m not enough. I’ve never been good enough. My whole life, I’ve been a disappointment… to everyone, even my father. I’m selfish and I’m unfair. I know I don’t deserve it but I can’t stop myself from craving for it. I want more. I crave for more… I want this baby and I want this family, with you. »

Steve had never realized how much Tony was damaged. How hurt he was. He had always thought he was a vane and shallow playboy. He had never imagined the pain he was hiding behind his carefree attitude and his jokes. Steve was falling in love. He was falling for this broken man, completely. He wanted to be there for him. He wanted to save him. He wanted to make up for all the misery. He was his omega and this is what he was supposed to do. He would soothe Tony’s pain and anger. He was going to submit to him, not because he had to or because he was inferior but because he wanted to. He was ready to embrace it now. He was ready to accept what he had been feeling since day one.

 « I’m sorry Tony. »

 « Don’t be sorry. I hate you when you are sorry… »

 « I want this too… I want this family with you…. »

 « We can do this together. I promise I won’t intrude on your life but it would mean a lot if you could be part of this family.» 

 « That's not what I mean. I want more. I love you, Tony. »

Tony didn’t say anything. He didn’t seem to believe what Steve’s words meant. 

 « I want to be yours and I want you to be mine. I want you to take care of me, not as the father of your baby, as your mate. I want to start fresh. I’m damaged too. I’m broken too. I have lost myself completely. I thought I knew everything but I didn’t. I didn’t know what to do. I still don’t. My world has collapsed and I’m all alone. I need you. Please help me build a new one, a beautiful and safe one. I need you to save me too. Just like you saved me in the past. You are my pillar in this world, you help me keep my sanity. Every time I lost my way you found me. Just in time. I love you. I’m not saying that because I’m carrying your child. I’m saying this because I have loved you for a long time. »

Tony looked at him, dumbfounded. He was staring at him for a while and then he spoke again.

 « Do you think we can ever get past this? Do you really think we can have something after everything I’ve put you through?» Tony asked. 

And for the first time since they had been together, Steve felt that they were both standing on equal grounds. He got closer to him and admired his handsome face for a while before asking the crucial question. The one that was burning his lips. What needed to be answered if they wanted to get past this.

 « Will you be able to forgive me one day? » 

Tony got even closer to him but didn’t answer.

 « I’m the one who should be forgiven, not you. Will you be able to put up with my shit? » He asked instead, looking deeply into Steve’s eyes.

 « I can put up with all your shit. » Steve whispered and he was being honest.

 « I’m controlling. »

 « I know. »

 « I’m gonna intrude on your privacy. »

 « I know. » 

 « I’m gonna watch everything you do, I will forbid you things. I will confine you. »

 « I don’t mind. »

 « I will ask you to obey me. »

 « I want to obey you. I love obeying you. I feel safe when I do. »

 « I don’t trust you anymore. You do know that right? I don’t trust you and I’m being unfair to you but I can’t help myself.»

 « You scare me sometimes.»

 « I will hurt you again. »

 « I will hurt you too. »

 « I’m too old for you. »

 « I’m 95 years old. »

 « Don’t get smart with me. »

Steve smiled. They were looking at each other, their eyes plunged into each other’s. Their faces were getting closer. Their mouths almost brushing.

 « Damn you, Steve Rogers. How can I resist you when you’re smiling like this. I’m trying to give you a way out of this. Go and save yourself. Find someone good. Someone who will make you happy.»

 « You _can_ make me happy Tony. I wanna get hurt, I wanna go down, I wanna get damaged even more and I wanna do it with you. » Steve was getting closer and closer, so close that Tony could almost breathe his words in. He closed his eyes.

 « You’re scary. » Tony muttered and Steve opened his eyes, he laughed. 

 « I love you. I think I’ve loved you ever since I met you. You were the one who triggered my heats. Take responsibility now.» Steve was grinning, his eyes challenging.

 « I wish! You’re just a very horny, very promiscuous omega. » Tony teased.

 « Are you saying I’m loose? » Steve answered, smiling.

 « I wouldn’t dare… »

 « That’s not fair… What should I say about you then? »

 « I never said I was fair… »

 « I’m only that horny with you. »

 « You’re lying. » Tony pouted. And Steve thought it was really cute.

 « I’m not. I know this now. Everything makes sense. I was just too oblivious to realize it before. » Steve was serious again. « Please Tony, forgive me. I know we can have something good together. » 

He wanted Tony to believe him so much. He had been so honest. For the first time he was being honest. He was finally true to his feelings. Tony flinched his head backward.  He looked at Steve for a few seconds before responding. 

 « I will forgive you. » He started « One day, I will forgive you. I want this so much. Can you forgive me too? »

 « Yes. I can. » Steve had never been so sure in his whole life.

Tony looked at him and smiled widely. He moved his face close to him again. 

 « I wanna kiss you now. »

Steve’s heart was exploding. It was what he had always wanted. 

 « Fuck yeah. » He let out.

 « Who are you? _My_ captain, would never swear, in _any_ circumstance. » Tony teased.

 « Silly. » Steve smiled but he couldn’t wait any longer. 

Steve bent his head toward Tony and kissed him lightly. He had never been so bold. He thought he could do it now. He thought he could take the initiative. Tony was not as impressive as he used to be. He wasn’t as unreachable as he used to be. Tony could be his as much as he was Tony’s. He already was his. Tony had said so. It’s just that Steve had never realized. 

They were equals now. Despite his being omega. Despite Tony being his pack alpha. They were equals, equally damaged, equally hurt, equally able to harm each other. This was fucked up, this was unhealthy, this going to be hard, this was maybe impossible but at the same time it was the truest, the most beautiful thing that Steve had had in his life. He wanted this more than anything. He would fight for this. He would fight for them. 

Tony cupped his jaw in his hand and caressed his cheek. He kissed him back, so deeply, so passionately, so controllingly. His tongue invaded his mouth and caressed his in the wildest kiss. Tony was licking and biting and snapping at his lips and his chin. He took Steve’s head in both his hands and ravished his mouth. He fell on his side and dragged Steve on the floor with him. Steve let himself be controlled. He loved it. He was over the moon, lost in the kiss, his mind going blank. He was forgetting everything else. He had wanted him so much. He had waited so long for it. He had suffered so much for it. He never wanted this kiss to stop. Tony was brutal and bestial but gentle at the same time. He was holding Steve’s face in his hand so delicately, so preciously that Steve’s heart was melting. He was the best kisser. His kisses could make Steve fly, could move mountains, could take the moon down.

Tony slowed down a bit and his kisses were more gentle, more affectionate. His right hand was holding Steve’s face as he was licking his tongue and his lips with love. His left hand fondled him, caressed him and reached down his belly. The strong and calloused hand of the powerful alpha settled on the bump and his belly felt really warm. Tony was brushing kindly and protectively. 

« I love you Steven Grant Rogers. I love you and I love this baby. »

Steve felt suddenly so happy, so emotional that he couldn’t hold himself back. His eyes prickled and he felt tears blurring his sight. He started crying silently. He kept crying and crying since he was pregnant and usually, he was pretty annoyed with himself, but not this time. This time he was accepting it, embracing it. He was emotional, he was wrecked, his body was changing. He was pregnant and was carrying his alpha’s child. He was going to have a baby with the man he loved and who loved him at least as insanely, as furiously, as brutally as he loved him. Steve brought his hand to his belly and tangled his fingers with Tony’s.

« I love you too » he whispered, in between pants « The both of you. »  

Tony smiled happily. His eyes were shining bright despite their dark color. Steve had never seen a smile so sincere on Tony’s face. He was so happy.

 « I so want to make love to you right now. » He said and embraced Steve in his strong alpha arms and hold him tight against him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK. I know it feels weird how their relationship changed so quickly. So it might appear great and everything but this ending is a bit bitter I think. This is not a happy ending. There had been too much angst, too many bad actions and bad decisions for them to live happily ever after. They have not yet resolved most of their issues. They may or may not in the future... I do realize this is probably not what most people expected... Sorry about that. I hope you enjoyed it nevertheless. 
> 
> This was supposed to be the last chapter but then I couldn't write the end.  
> I'm currently experiencing a writer's block. I had first planned to have a sweet and kind love-making session for them to make up but it doesn't really feel right at this point so I'm not sure I'm going to write it sweet and kind. (I'm open for suggestions) 
> 
> This is almost the end. I think one (or maybe two) chapter left. ;-)


	27. Working things out. (Tony is not that much of an asshole after all)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve and Tony learn how to be happy together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... I don't know if anyone is still following this fic but I finally found it in myself to finish it. It isn't really heading to where I wanted it at first but I think it's getting close. 
> 
> Also, I added new tags. 
> 
> Enjoy!

"Make love to me" Steve whispered.

It wasn't the most sensible thing to do. The most sensible thing to do would be to go and check if the baby was alright but it was the thing Steve wanted the most.

Tony mounted him slowly, taking both his hands in his and lying Steve down, delicately but completely, on the floor. Then, he pinned him down and stretched his arms to rise up above Steve and dominate him completely and he stared into his eyes with a tender smile. Steve was subjugated, he couldn't do anything when Tony looked at him like that. His alpha look was too powerful and Steve was instantly overwhelmed. He had to submit. He didn't escape Tony stare, he couldn't, and he intuitively spread his legs to let his alpha settle between them. He could feel the raging cock of his alpha pumping against his own hard-on. His breathing started to intensify and accelerate as Tony grew feral over him. 

Tony smiled and dropped his head in the crook of Steve's neck and kissed him delicately, blowing ticklish warm air on Steve's neck and sending him to heaven. He let his body collapse on Steve slowly and chuckled against his neck. "I can't resist you when you submit to me like that." He whispered against his ear.

He pushed on his arms again to stare at Steve affectionately. "You know that you can push me away, right? I don't know if you were taught something like that back in the days or if it's just the way you react to me but... You _can_  say no if you don't want this."

Steve looked at him in bewilderment. "No, I can't. I can't resist you. You're too powerful." He muttered in acceptation. 

"That's all in your head, Steve." Tony went on. "No alpha can submit omega with only a stare, even the most powerful one. Except if they are in heat and maybe not even then, for some omega."

Steve was taken aback. How come he was never ever able to control himself when around Tony?

"You should resist me, you should get properly checked up, I want my pup to be fine." Tony continued while kissing Steve's mouth and cheek and then down his neck. His right left hand was stroking his hair while he kept kissing and kissing and kissing and drove Steve crazy.

"I want you to make love to me." Steve explained. "I want you to kiss me again. This is all I ever wanted... For you to kiss me. You never did. This is what I always wanted." Tony's left hand caressed his cheek and he let his thumb run across Steve's face, almost touching his lips. A flash of pain ran through Tony's eyes before he looked at Steve tenderly and smiled. He seized the back of his neck and hold his head firmly but gently with both his hands and brought Steve's mouth against his to kiss him again softly, so softly but fiercely at the same time. Steve felt so hot. Tony opened Steve's mouth with his tongue and caressed the insides, licking Steve's tongue delicately and so sensually Steve's mind went blank. Then he pulled away slightly and muttered "I'm sorry" into Steve's mouth. "I wanted to kiss you so badly" He said while kissing Steve again. "but I was afraid I would lose myself completely in you. I was so drawn to you I had to set boundaries to let you go because you wanted to be casual." Tony explained, eyes half-closed still kissing Steve's mouth and jaw and neck again. 

"I'm so sorry, Tony. This is all on me. I hurt you." Steve said and found it in himself to bring his hand on his alpha's head in a comforting and soothing gesture. He realized it was the first time that he actually took the initiative to touch him and relished in the gesture. He felt so powerful and held his alpha tightly against him.

Tony chuckled and dropped his head in the crook of Steve's neck and started licking up to his ear, electrifying Steve's entire body to the core. His cock was throbbing hard and Tony started rutting against him.

"You are so amazing. So beautiful, I've wanted to do that to you... I've wanted you to be mine, ever since I led eyes on you."

Steve smiled but remembered how Tony had looked and what he had said and it hurt him again. "You said I was disappointing."

"You were! When I saw you, you were the most noble, the most dignified, the most beautiful omega I had ever seen in my entire life. I wanted to make you mine instantly. This was the first time in my life that I wanted omega so badly. It unsettled me completely... But I couldn't scent you. So I tried to smell you and you didn't smell omega, so I thought I was wrong. Still, I wanted to get in your pants either way."

"I thought you meant I wasn't alpha like I should have."

"Why would I be disappointed you are not alpha? You've got a serious self-loathing issue about this alpha-omega thing, you know? There's nothing wrong with being omega. I don't know how you got that idea into your thick head, probably the period you were raised in, but seriously, we'll need to work on that."

Those words were so simple but they reached Steve deep in his heart touching and soothing an old wound that had been infecting him for so long. He brought his right hand on his alpha's cheek and looked at him with grateful eyes. "I love you." He whispered and kissed his alpha fiercely while running his hands down Tony's back and pressed him tight against him, rubbing his crotch against his raging cock.

Tony seemed to like it that Steve was being more forward. He raised his head again and smiled at Steve while staring deeply into his eyes. _Submit_ they were saying. _Submit._ And Steve submitted to his alpha completely which made Tony feral again.

He kissed Steve furiously while tearing his clothes away. His mouth ran down his neck and his chest while he was holding his neck tight in his left hand. His tongue and lips were dancing upon Steve's skin, making his body hot and prickling with desire. He felt a warmth taking him over and a flush of slick went down his pants. Tony was maintaining his neck on the floor assuring his dominance over him and kissed and licked his chest and his sensitive nipples, sending shivers down his spine and another wave of slick. His ass and cock were throbbing inside his pants, begging to be touched. His body was all tense in pleasure and desire. 

Tony let go of his neck and grabbed his pectorals caressing his nipples and pinching them while his mouth was licking down the line of his abs. When he reached his navel, his kisses went soft and tender. He brought his hands down Steve's waist and grabbed him strongly while kissing his belly. Then both his hand went caressing it. Steve looked at his alpha who was worshiping his belly, fondling it with gentle kisses and caresses. Steve had completely forgotten about his little baby bump. His rose on his elbows and watched him alpha contemplating the life inside with love. Tony turned to him and smiled tenderly. "I'm so glad you were omega. I was so glad when I saw you really were omega. I wanted to protect you with my life, with everything I had. You gave me the most precious thing an alpha could desire."

"I thought you knew I was already."

"I was confused. You didn't smell like one."

"Didn't Howard tell you?"

"No. I suspected though. He worshiped you like a long lost lover. It never worked out with my mum. It was always about you. I guessed he probably was drawn to you just like I was... Peggy too. She procreated but she never had a love life. She was still in love with you I guess. In the end, my old man drowned himself in alcohol and sorrow."

"I thought they respected the alpha in me..." Steve said bitterly.

"Why couldn't they just respect the omega in you? You think omega are not worthy of respect?" Steve didn't answer that, those words had reopened his wound again.  "I'm glad though, Tony continued, that none of them could get you. You can't imagine how happy I was to be your first."

"Why didn't you take me during my first heat then?" Steve said regrets in his voice, all his feelings and senses enhanced by the raging desire he felt for his alpha. 

Tony laughed, setting his head on his belly and caressing him in a gentle way, more affectionate than sexual but very intense still. "You can't even imagine the amount of self-control I used up that night." His caresses went stronger and more sensual and his hands went down his thighs, pulling down his wet pants. "I didn't want to take advantage of you. I wanted to be a good person and do the right thing. In the end, I did take advantage of you..."

"You are a good person, Tony. And you only took advantage of me because I let you." Steve's voice was soft and more lewd than he had meant to but he was too excited to control it.

Tony raised his eyes and looked at him with surprise and hurt.

"You're so kind to me, baby. So kind... Don't you ever do that again, you hear me?" Tony took his most domineering alpha tone and ordered slowly. "Don't You Ever Do Something You Don't Wanna Do Ever Again!" asserting his power over Steve with each words. Steve faltered and submitted again to the powerful alpha gaze. He dropped his head on the floor and breathed heavily.

Tony's hands went back to pulling Steve out off his pants and his hot and wet mouth resumed kissing languorously and ravishing his body. "I'm gonna make you feel so good baby." 

Tony freed Steve's wet cock from his briefs and it jolted crazily with want, a wave of slick flushed down his ass again, staining the floor. Tony grabbed his waist and Steve felt the hot air he blowed on his hard cock. Tony licked it from bottom to the tip, sending electricity all over Steve's body.

When Tony took him in his mouth, Steve gasped and stopped breathing. His mind went blank with surprise and pleasure. Tony felt so hot and soft and Steve had never felt something like this. He was flowing slick on the floor. He couldn't help his hand from seizing Tony's head and forced him down a little. Tony didn't protest but started opening him up with his fingers. _One. Two. Three._ He was pushing inside and rubbing his soft spot, invading him completely, possessing him. _Four._ Steve moaned and cried and gasped in pleasure. His head was spinning, his body was burning, his heart was about to explode in his chest and hurt him at each beat. He let his hands drop on the floor but his body was so tense and jittery that his gesture was too brutal and he whined in pain and pleasure. Tony was pushing deep and rubbing fiercely back and forth the four finders inside of him, his mouth still ravishing his cock. _Five._ His whole fist was almost inside, making Steve cry and shake at the invasion and the dilatation. He almost came but Tony blocked it somehow. He removed his hand and a wave of slick flowed out with it. Tony sat up and stared at Steve who was debauched and completely enraptured, trying to catch his breath. Steve stared back, enthralled in his gaze. Tony brought his glistening hand to his mouth and licked Steve's juice. Eyes feral again. Steve's heart skipped in his chest and was beating hard making his ribs hurt. 

Tony's hand left his mouth to caress his sweaty face and Tony held his neck down again, pressing gently but dominantly. He mounted Steve again and his other hand touched his face, slipping a thumb in his mouth that Steve licked instinctively.

"You are so beautiful, so perfect. So perfect for me... " Tony let out maybe unconsciously. "I'm not worthy of you though... I can't believe you were mine... You have no idea how crazily jealous I was when I heard you wanted to date other alphas. I was so fucking jealous and enraged when you decided to sign in on that app... Be careful Steve, I might never ever let you go."

"I don't want you to." Steve whispered. 

Tony let go of his neck and seized both his hand gently before pinning them down forcefully. His feral eyes plunged deep into Steve's eyes dictating everything. _Spread your legs_ they said. _Open up for me_. Steve raised his hips and rubbed himself against Tony's crotch. Tony let go of one hand and took his cock out before pinning the hand down again. The thick burning rod rubbed against Steve's loose entrance. He started whining and whimpering with desire, moving his hips jerkily to grant his alpha a better access. 

Tony teased, taking pleasure in watching Steve so out of himself, consumed with want. He kissed him fiercely, ravishing his mouth, enrapturing his tongue, making Steve lose his mind. 

When a wave of slick flowed down again Tony penetrated his gaping hole, slowly waiting for Steve to swallow him completely. Steve moaned and cried in pleasure and frustration. Then Tony thrusted deep and hard inside, pushing Steve back on the floor each time. He furiously banged him with all the rage and love he felt. Steve gasped and moaned at each thrust, mind going blank at the intensity of his pleasure. His cocked dripping precum all over himself. He was about to come. 

He freed his hands from Tony's grasp and embraced his alpha - his lover - and kissed him languorously, biting his lips a little. The gesture obviously pleased Tony because he thrusted one last time in a growl and spilled his come inside Steve who came too when he felt it spurt and saw the feral eyes fixed upon him.

For a second, Tony tried to come out but Steve tightened his embrace and squeezed his legs to keep his alpha against him, inside him until they were locked together. 

Tony dropped his head in the crook of Steve's neck when he understood and let himself indulge in the omega's soothing embrace. He kissed and bit softly his neck until Steve felt the knot growing inside of him, making him feel whole, feel two, feel three, feel family and happy. Tony bit him hard and marked him again at the same spot, burning Steve's skin and making him gasp. The mark, even though they had severed their bond, had remained and the skin there was sensitive. Steve wanted to cry but he didn't and tightened his alpha even more and wished to stay like this forever.

"You're mine" Tony whispered against his neck. "Don't you ever stray again. Or I'll kill you this time."

Steve shivered at the thought.

"You realize that I don't really mean that, yeah? This is just the alpha instinct talking. If this isn't working, we'll sit down and have an adult conversation about it. This isn't the middle-age anymore, right? You are your own person and you can do what you want."

Steve laughed.

"Although, I really wish you wouldn't. I _am_ crazy jealous."

Steve didn't answer but kissed his mate on the cheek.

 ...

 Steve lay down on the medical bed, waiting for Bruce to do the ultrasound. 

"You seem to be in an overly good mood, Cap... For someone who was just about to hurt their own pup only two hours ago."

Steve was in a very good mood, indeed. He was absolutely blissed. He had everything he had always wanted. Well, not exactly, because he had never known that it was what he wanted until he had it and then lost it. Now he had it again though, and it made him extremely happy and content and whole. Like he had fulfilled his dream and found his place in this world. And he was not about to let Bruce's judgmental comment spoil this for him.

"The baby's fine, Bruce" He said smiling at his little bump and caressing it in a protective way. "I know it. I can feel it." 

"We'll see."

"I would never hurt my pups, Bruce. I must have flexed my abs to protect it - Paternal instinct - with the serum and everything, it will be fine." 

"Yeah, exactly, the serum and everything, that's what I'm afraid of. You really punched hard." 

Steve got worried suddenly, what if he had really hurt it? What if he were to lose it? What would he do? What would Tony say? He felt his heart sank and his face got cold as if all the blood was leaving it suddenly. Bruce must have seen it because he smiled reassuringly.

"Don't worry, Cap. That's very unlikely." He finally said.

"Why would you say that then?"

"Because I want you to realize that the stunt you just pulled, it can never happen again, Steve. This is serious. You have a baby to take care of now."

"It won't."

"Are you sure about that? Because seriously, in the past few weeks all I've seen is your emotions going up and down and meddling with everything in your life, including your mission as an Avenger. I'm not sure you're really rational about all this right now, seeing the state you're in."

"What do you mean the state I'm in?" Steve asked a bit aggressively.

"Obviously! You know... pregnant! Hormones all over the place! On top of that, you just mated and bonded for the second time with the sire of the said pup, which, in my opinion is not the smartest move right now..."

Steve felt a blush redding his face and looked down in embarrassment. "How..."

"Please, Cap. You smell like him from a mile, even for a beta like me, and the mark on your shoulder is pretty intense, too."

Steve couldn't help but grin stupidly at the happiness of hearing that. He chuckled. "This is fine. Everything's fine. He's accepted me and the baby."

"How could you have doubts about that? If you thought, even for a second, that Tony wouldn't take responsibility for his pups, then you clearly don't know your mate as much as you think you do."

He felt rage growing inside. Bruce had no place to judge. He knew nothing. 

"We're fine Bruce. We're gonna make this work."

"What if you don't...? Seeing how you both acted recently, that thing between the two of you, is clearly not as peachy as you let us supposed and something tells me we don't even know the half of it..."

"We've worked it out. We're working it out. This is gonna be fine. How is that you're business anyway?" Steve explained rightfully annoyed.

"You better be! 'Cause it seems to me that this baby is not your priority right now and it should! All you think about is Tony and he shouldn't be the one you focus on."

"How can you say that?" Steve was deeply offended by that. Bruce had no right to assume something like that but what hurt the most was that deep inside, Steve knew it wasn't that far from the truth and it scared him.

"Well, Tony rejected you and you wanted to get rid of it and now that he wants you again, you're suddenly father of the year? What if Tony rejects you again?"

Steve took some time to think about it and visualize this life growing inside, his hands fondling the bump. He would love it and cherish it and raise it the best he could. With or without Tony. This, he was absolutely sure of it now. 

"I will never hurt my baby, Bruce." He said slowly, meaning every word. "Never. No matter what happens between me and Tony." 

He looked at Bruce challengingly who sustained his gaze. "I hope so, Cap. I really do. Cause if you hurt this baby you're gonna have to answer to the Hulk."

They look at each other in silence as the tension was rising. Then, Steve laughed and Bruce smiled in return.

"Would you like to be the god fat-?" Steve asked. "Yes, I would. Very much." Bruce answered before Steve finished his sentence. 

Bruce spread some gel on Steve's belly and took the transducer. Steve's heart skipped a bit, he was going to hear the heartbeat again. He wished Tony was here, though. He hadn't even had the opportunity to show him the picture.

"Do you want me to call him?" Bruce asked suddenly, still holding the transducer in his hand and showing an amused look on his face.

"Yes!" It was so obvious he should be here.

"Jarvis? Tell Tony to get his ass down there asap!" Bruce said while holding the transducer in the air. Then he looked at Steve. "Do you want to wait for him?"

Steve nodded, pressing his lips against each other as stress and worries were building up inside.

"Just promise me, Cap, that you two are gonna be sensible about this. You need a safe and healthy environment to raise a child."

"I _will_ stop the missions for now."

"This is not only about that. You need to keep your emotions together. You can't go stressing out each time something's wrong. You're bound to fight again, every couple quarrels. you can't let that affect you as it has been so far... I think you should get help."

"Keeping my emotion together... that's rich coming from you!"

"Yeah. This is exactly why I'm the best person to tell you that. I know a bunch about anger management and controlling emotion."

Tony didn't take long to join them. He stood on Steve's left side and held a firm but soothing hand on Steve shoulder. He turned to his mate and smiled affectionally and reassuringly. Steve raised his right arm to catch his mate's neck and pulled him for a kiss. Tony kissed him back but not as passionately as Steve would have wanted. He broke the kiss while focusing on Bruce and left a twinge of disappointment in Steve's belly. Steve kissed him again and forced his tongue inside to make a statement and this time got Tony's full attention. 

"Just get a room. You two are nauseating." Bruce protested exasperatedly.

Steve let go of his lover and laughed. "Bruce thinks we're making a mistake." His tone was teasing as if what Bruce was thinking was so far fetched that they could joke about it but, deep inside, Steve was waiting for a sign from his mate that he was thinking the same and they were both on the same page about this. 

There was no sign. Tony tensed and inched away awkwardly. "Bruce has a point."

Steve felt his heart sank in his chest and panic rose inside of him. "You've just marked me." His voice was trembling, letting his disappointment show.

"Spur of the moment thing." Tony said smiling, obviously not noticing how distressed Steve felt because he kept looking at Bruce's equipment. "Hard to resist you."

Steve felt a lump in his throat and tears were on the brim of his eyes. "Are you regretting this? Are you rejecting me again?" Steve stammered with difficulty, panic in his voice.

Tony turned to him with a concern look and brought his hand to Steve's cheek. He kissed him gently. "No!" He kissed him again, biting his lower lip possessively. "No, babe, no. I'm not regretting this, even for a second. I would never leave you pregnant and unbonded. Ever." He looked at Bruce again and paused. "I just think... It'd be better if... We should take it slow. The last thing I wanna do is making you unhappy and distressed again. This is bad for the baby. We need to be parents first. "

Bruce must have approved because there was a look of agreement between the two of them, then Tony turned to Steve again and smiled gently. "Are you okay with that?"

Steve nodded, eyes fixated on his mate, drawn to him as if nothing else mattered. It wasn't ideal but Steve would take it. They were probably right, Steve thought, but his heart was telling him otherwise. His instincts were to never leave his mate's side.

"Are you two done? Cause I ain't got all day!" Bruce interrupted mockingly.

They both turned to him and saw him waiting the transducer still in hand.

"Yeah" Steve grinned and turned to Tony again. "Are you ready to see it for the first time?"  He asked while taking his hand and squeezing tight.

Tony brought the hand to his mouth and kissed it gently while his eyes were focused on the screen. "I saw it already. You dropped the picture last time, I kept it with me all this time."

Steve looked at him lovingly and felt a warmth taking over his body. His sudden happiness was soon disturbed by the cold touch of the transducer. He looked at the screen too and saw the baby moving. He could see and hear the heart pumping. Tony squeezed his hand again and held him tight. Steve knew at that moment that he would stand by him to raise this child, no matter what, and their relationship became secondary all at once.

"Looks like everything's fine. That pup's in perfect health." 

Steve chuckled in relief. He must have been pretty tense because he felt his whole body relax instantly. The baby was fine. Everything was gonna be fine. He and Tony would make this work. They would learn how to be happy together, as a family. They both looked at the screen with sparks in their eyes, saying nothing, mesmerized by the tiny heart beating.

"You two better get your asses to therapy. I mean it." Bruce interrupted their little dreamy moment.

"Therapy. Yep. No problem. For this pup? I'll go to therapy. Anytime" Tony agreed, clearly unconvinced. 

Steve and Tony were similar on that point. They hardly believed in the efficiency of therapy and distrusted psychologists. Tony probably even more, he hated talking about feelings. Steve had noticed.

"You better be, Tony." Bruce snapped threateningly. "Cause as the godfather, pack alpha or not, I won't hesitate a second to take this child from you if you ever push Steve into such a distressful state again.

"Godfather?" Tony asked while smiling in surprise.

"I'll tell you everything." Steve laughed.

"We will, Bruce. Don't worry. I'll go to the shrink. He'll go to the shrink. Hell, we'll even do couple's therapy if that's what it takes. Won't we, sugar? Tony explained still holding Steve's hand tight.

Steve grinned and agreed while sitting up on the bed, never letting go of that hand. "We will."

"I hope so" Bruce pouted and Steve laughed happily, then he pulled Tony down and captured his mouth in a passionate kiss, throwing his tongue down his throat. 

"Guys! Seriously? You're sickening. I think I'm gonna throw up."

 ...

They both left Bruce's lab while holding hand. Steve couldn't let go. He felt the need, the _urge,_ to stay close to his alpha and never leave his side. He dreaded the moment they would have to part. Tony wanted to take things slow. 

They stopped in front of the elevator. Tony freed his hand from Steve's grasp and seized his hips to turn him in front of him. He fondled his hips a bit and caressed the bump on his belly, then he brought his hand to Steve's face and ran it through his hair. 

"I think you should stay in your room for now. We need to discuss this."

"Why?"

"I don't wanna upset you again. I think you should find some kind of emotional stability before we go any further."

"We've already been as far as one can get."

"You know what I mean."

"I wanna be with you Tony. I wanna stay with you. I never want to leave your side again."

"You'll have to at some point." Tony chuckled.

"It's just a figure of speech."

"I know. I feel the same."

"Then why would you push me away?" He paused and looked down, trying to find the right words. Then he looked at his mate again. "Those three days I spent with you during my last heat were the best days of my life. I wanna feel like that again."

A glimpse  of pain crossed through Tony's eyes.

"I'm sorry Steve. I know you feel blissed right now, because of the hormones and the bond and everything. I feel the same. Everything seems perfect but it's not. I'm not sure we can't find again what we had then. Now I need you to focus on our pup. I think it's best if we keep our distance for a while, so you can see things clearly and think about what you want from this relationship. Take the time to build something solid."

"Why does everyone thinks they know better what's best for me? I'm not a kid Tony, I know what I want."

"Do you?" He paused while looking straight into Steve's eyes. "Because we can't ignore what happened since then. I've done things. You've done things. There's a lot of shit to get over. I'll try my best to get over them, but I'm not there yet. And I'm not sure you are either."

"I'm sorry Tony. You need time. I get it. I won't push." Steve had been too naive to think his cheating would be forgiven that easily. He was disappointed but accepted it nevertheless, hoping they would get over it.

Tony smiled. His hand that was touching Steve's hair brushed down his cheek and neck and held Steve firmly while his gaze plunged into Steve's eyes. "But I want you to know that, whatever happens between us, I will always be there for you and that I love you, " the other hand settled on Steve's bump and kept it warm under its caresses. "the both of you. No matter what." 

Steve didn't answer and was hardly hiding his disappointment and his disagreement. Tony patted his shoulders.

"I'll see you at dinner, yeah?"

... 

 

Steve was lying on his bed, processing everything. Today had been a rollercoaster. Tony loved him. Tony had loved him from day one.  Tony worshipped him and trusted him and wanted to have everything with him. They could be happy together. 

The thing is, he had _betrayed_ that trust. He had taken advantage of that love and disregarded Tony's feelings, making him the asshole, making him the bad guy, making it all about himself. He was as much of an asshole. He had been egotistical and self-indulgent and had never taken into consideration the other party. His behavior was selfish and he had hurt Tony.

He wasn't making excuses for Tony. He knew perfectly well what it was. Tony had purposely used his superiority and their bond to hurt him. It was a childish and spiteful revenge. Tony had done that while Steve was vulnerable and lost and didn't know what he was doing. It was pure and simple abuse. And Steve knew it. He had been researching it. He had read about it. Yes but... Tony was vulnerable too. He had more issues than Steve could imagine. He had more issues than Steve, period. He too was in a bad place. Tony had tried to prevent this. He had tried to protect Steve but he had stubbornly insisted to jump into the lion's den and got bitten in return.

That didn't make it okay. He knew that. He hadn't known before but now he knew. Even a mated alpha doesn't have the right to force himself on his mated omega. There were laws against that now, even though in practice, they were rarely enforced. Still, it was nice that this was acknowledged. Steve hadn't even thought about it.

Had Tony really done it though? Tony had not forced Steve into anything. Steve had agreed to all of it. Maybe it was manipulation that got him there but Steve knew better. He couldn't entirely blame Tony for this. He had been manipulative too and abusive in a way. Actually he had been with all his teammates. By lying to them and surprise them with an unexpected heat, he had caught them off guards. He was lucky he had thought, none of them had sexually assaulted him. Now he looked at it with a different perspective. They were lucky he had escaped before one of them give in to instinct. He thought about Natasha and Clint, who were actually a couple, in a loving relationship. They would have killed each other over him. What if one of them had fucked him that night? How would they have felt about it? They would probably feel guilty, shameful and... They did not want it either. They did not. None of them did. Well, it would have been worst for Steve, obviously, because he was the omega so... Would it really?

He had coerced Tony into having a relationship with him - a relationship he didn't want, at least, not on those terms. Tony had tried to resist but couldn't so he had tried to control it in the worst possible way. It was purely and simply wrong... but what other choice did Tony have? He could have been adult about it. So could Steve. He could have been more honest. So could Steve. He could have talked about his feelings. So. Could. Steve...

Tony had done it once. Once he had gone too far. He had come into his room and used him without really asking for his consent. Well, he had his consent. Implicitly. And to be honest, Steve had loved it. Tony was his mate. Steve had agreed to this, to all of it - to be used as a sexual object. Tony had warned him. Well, he hadn't been really fair. He had used Steve's desperation to get his consent but he had it. As his mate, Tony was in his right. He had been an asshole about it but he was in his right. 

And he knew he had been an asshole about it. And he had come to apologize. ' _I’m trying to say sorry, Steve.'_ Tony had said. He had tried to tell him how he felt. ' _I have these feelings… (I love you)_

Steve remembered that enigmatic discussion he had with Tony that night. He had been so busy feeling guilty over James that he didn't listen. He didn't even try to understand him. He could have pushed him, ask him for more. Instead he had done everything he could to make him leave as soon as possible and he he'd been relieved when Tony was gone because he could continue his little love affair with James. Now everything was so obvious. He could read in between Tony's lines.

_I’m just an asshole... (I don't think I deserve you so I'm not even trying. It's easier to be an asshole than to fail again.)_

_I don’t do this. I don’t do relationships. (I'm so scared of being hurt that I never get close to anybody.)_

_But with you, I… (I really want it.)  I don’t want to have this (a casual fuckbuddies' relationship)  with you. I want… (the real deal)_  

_This is hurting too much...'_

Tony. Self-loathing insecure Tony with a guilt complex. Tony who hated talking about feelings. Tony who was always hiding his true feelings behind a cynical  playboy persona. That Tony had come to his room and had poured his heart to him and what did Steve do? He was obsessed with getting his ass fucked by someone else behind his back. Behind his _mate's_ \- his _alpha's_ \- back.

Cheating was already a bad thing in itself, even more when you're bonded but cheating your alpha... That was something else. It wasn't a crime, no. Not anymore. Thanks for that. But society had not come that far yet. Steve not only had cheated and betrayed his alpha, but he had done it while he was pregnant with their pup. He had begged for it. He had chased James all over his apartment. He didn't even enjoy it.

And When he was back Tony was waiting for him, he had made dinner. Maybe he had planned to tell him about his feelings then. What if Steve had not cheated? They could have been together for real, maybe. And when he heard he was expecting, it would have been a good news. Tony would have hold him tight and tell him how happy he was and that it was the best day of his life...

He had ruined _everything._ He could have had it all and he had ruined it completely. How could they come back from this?

 

There was a knock on his door. "Can I come in?" Natasha asked and didn't wait for his answer to open the door and settle on his bed next to him.

"Wanna scold me too? No need. Tony and Bruce already gave me hell about it."

Natasha put her hand on his knee and fondled him affectionately. "I just wanna know how you feel. I'm worried about you."

"Fine." He pouted.

They stayed silent a moment. Natasha rubbing Steve's thigh in a protective and comforting way. She had her back turned to him because she knew he couldn't face her, yet. 

"So..." She started, to break the lingering silence. "He did it again, huh?" She asked a tone slightly too accusing in Steve's taste.

"What?" He asked, pretending he didn't know whom she was talking about.

"Stark..."

"What about Tony?"

She laid her gaze on his bite mark. "He made you his..."

"Yeah..." Steve admitted with more shame and regret than he wanted to show. "Spur of the moment things."

"Wow." Natasha protested, a disbelieving expression on her face. "He's a jerk."

"I made him do it, Nat." He let out in a defeated sigh. 

Natasha turned to him with a curious but skeptical face. "Don't do that. Don't give him excuses."

"I'm not, Nat. It's all on me. I... I used his alpha instinct against him. I mean, I... I literally forced him to stay inside me until he gave in..." He explained.

She turned her back to him again and hid her face in her hands with a grossed out expression as if she was seeing the pictures in her head. "Ew. Too much detail..."

Then, she looked at him again with a quizzical face. "Steve! You sly little shit. You don't do things half-way, huh?"

They both laughed.

"What can I say? When I want something I get it." He explained, still laughing.

"Yeah, I think we all got that. You stubborn power omega!" She said smiling and felt silent again, her eyes in a haze. "Are you sure this is what you want?"

"I _was_ sure."

"And now?"

"I don't know, Nat. He wants to take things slow. Thinks we should be parents first. Doesn't want me to stay with him..."

"Seems to me like a pretty reasonable thing to do."

"Yeah. Everybody thinks that."

"And you don't?"

"I wanna be close to him, Nat. I never wanna leave his side. but... What if... What if this is only my instinct or ...or  the hormones or whatever talking?"

She looked contemplative for a long moment and the silence lasted more than Steve could handle.

"I don't know what to say, Honey... When did you start feeling that way?"

"I'm not sure... I... I didn't know what I felt until... " _James_ he thought but didn't say it out loud. He probably got lost in his memories for a bit too long because Natasha got on him again. "Until?"

"Nevermind... It's just... He got under my skin from day one. Everything was _about_ him but I never realized... I didn't know what it was until now. Now, I know. Now, I'm sure."

"Wow. That's ... good, I guess. What about you? Are you sure about yourself too?"

Steve didn't answer right away. He had been thinking about it, about all of it, and he was trying to find the right words.

"I've... Never felt so comfortable in my body. I feel good. It feels right. It feels... _home._  It feels like I'm where I'm supposed to be and doing what I'm supposed to do and it makes me happy."

"Wow, Steve! You've come a long way!"

"I have, right? All on my own." He grinned.

Natasha raised an eyebrow. "You're still getting your ass to therapy, Cap." She said, very serious despite the humor in her tone. Steve crossed his arms and pouted. "You scared the hell out of us this morning." She justified.

"I know." He said, his voice faltering in shame. "I don't know what came over me. It won't happen again."

Natasha nodded in a caring smile and pressed his knee in a comforting way again.

"So? She started, to change the subject. "Are you happy being omega now?"

Steve hesitated before answering. "I'm not _happy._ Nor sad either. I'm just who I am and that's it. And it can never be any other way. I... I was wrong Nat. I was wrong about what being alpha and being omega implies. I'm omega. I've always been. I know that now. When I see how you guys react and everything. This isn't me. I'm not alpha and I'm not beta either... It's just... I didn't know I could have the things I wanted before. It's not... It's not about myself that I was uncomfortable with. I thought it was at first. I mean, having heats and all is a bother but I only made it harder by refusing to accept that reality about myself. And having heats can be pretty awesome too... "

"Is the sex that good with Stark?"

"It's amazing." He answered tit for tat. "Sex with Tony is... " He looked vaguely in the air, remembering. "Is... Is... It's almost sacred."

"Okay. I get it. You love him."

"I learned two things today. I am omega and I can get the things I want. I just... I hadn't realized that it was hard for you too guys. I was unhappy about biology controlling me but it's the same for you. I just never thought about it before, I guess. I was just really unhappy about what was expected of me and about what my role in the society consisted in but it didn't make me any less omega...

"I want to make sure you know that being attracted to alpha doesn't necessarily mean that you are omega right? Gender and sexuality are two different things."

"I know. I've been reading about it. A lot. And... Now I am aware how lucky I am. I _was_ born in the wrong body. I was too weak and too sickly to be myself entirely but now I can. I can be myself and I can be more. I have this body now which makes me able to do the things I wanna do and have the things I wanna have. I feel like I can make a difference. Not every omega can say the same, even today."

Natasha looked at him dumbfounded. "Wow. You've really thought this through... I'm really happy for you. You seem so confident. It's been a while since I saw you like that. So why the long face then?"

"I could have had everything, Nat. The whole shebang. If I had been more honest with myself and with him... I screwed. I ruined it. Everything. I ruined my chances with him."

"Did he reject you?" Natasha asked matter-of-factly.

"No..."

"Then he left the door open for you."

"You think so?"

"If Tony is really what you want, then get him back. Don't give up on him."

 

...

 

Steve was the last one to head down to the common area for dinner. Everybody was already there. Sitting at the table. Even people who didn't belong there. Thor and Sam had come over to celebrate the success of their rescue mission. Colonel Rhodes was there too. And Pepper Potts... That little beta slut was all over Tony. _His_ Tony. Steve knew about their friendship. He knew about their history and that it meant nothing. She had never been an issue before. Steve knew he had no reason to feel jealous but he was too sensitive today. He was just a bundle of nerve and not in the mood to compete with anyone - especially not a _beta_ girl - over his alpha. Now it was simply not the right time to mess with him.

When he entered the room everybody stopped talking and looked at him with curious and worried eyes. Maybe he was a bit obvious about it. He glared at Pepper, whose face suddenly turned pale and apologetic.

"Move" He commanded. 

The poor girl stumbled up and changed her seat while avoiding Steve's glare. "I'm... I'm sorry Steve. Of course this is your seat, obviously. I didn't mean... We were just talking..."

Tony looked at Steve with a wan smile, half-confused, half-proud. He didn't say anything. 

"Yeah! Get your man, Cap!" Clint joked.

Everybody laughed except Pepper and Tony. Steve ignored them and took his rightful seat by his alpha and leaned against him as if nothing had happened. He snuggled against Tony until he gave in and put his arms around Steve's shoulders. Tony held him firmly against him and he felt happy and safe again. Steve spent the entire dinner leaning against his alpha, his head resting on his shoulder. Tony had taken care of him like he was the most precious thing in the world. Neither Tony, nor anybody else gave him shit about all the things he had done. They were all very caring and protective. Being pregnant had its perks he thought.

Thor had proposed a toast to celebrate their new union and new family. Everybody cheered, even Pepper clapped. Tony had smiled, the same insecure wan smile, there was a glimpse of bitterness in his eyes. It hurt Steve a bit, even so, he didn't lose his resolve. He would get his alpha back no matter what. 

When dinner was over, there were movies suggestions and people started moving to the lounging area. Tony stood up and freed himself from Steve's grasp. He stretched. "All right guys, that was a fucking long day. I think I'm gonna call it a night." He headed for the elevator. Steve followed him like a lost puppy. Never letting more than three feet separate them.

"Steve. What are you doing?"

"I'm coming with you."

"I thought we agreed you were gonna stay in your room for now."

"You said we needed to discuss this, didn't you?" Tony sigh in defeat. Steve continued. "I've had time to think this through."

Tony smiled again but this time his smile was more tender and amused.  "You're never gonna let this go, are you?"

"Nope." Steve answered with a victorious grin.

"Fine." Tony surrendered. "Come up. We discuss this and you go back to your room." Steve opened his mouth to say yes but didn't have the time. "And no sex!" Tony added while putting his index finger on Steve's mouth which probably had the opposite effect if Tony was trying to prevent Steve from wanting sex. 

Once in Tony's penthouse, Steve walked in without waiting for Tony to invite him and headed to the master bedroom - not the guest bedroom that had been his own during his heat. Tony obviously didn't agree and suggested to lay on the couch.

"My back hurts Tony, I'm tired and I need to get rest. I think we'll be better on the bed." 

Tony's face went from annoyed to worried. He started to apologize. "Of course, babe. I'm sorry. I didn't think... Bedroom it is, then."

Steve internally smiled. He didn't know how long he would be able to pull the pregnant card to get what he wanted but it sure felt very nice. He paced quickly and shiftily to Tony's room  and lay down the large bed. He looked at the ceiling and pictured himself staying here forever. He could be happy here. He knew it.

Tony hopped on the bed next to him and sat up against the cushions. Tablets in hands. Steve knew Tony dreaded that kind of conversation and the tablets gave him an out whenever he wanted as well as something he could focus on if needed be. Steve had always been impressed by how Tony was constantly working on something, millions ideas coming to his head, and now he thought it was extremely sexy.

"So... " Tony started, waiting for Steve to say something. He probably thought Steve was better at this conversation thing. Steve was not and he didn't want to discuss this. There was nothing to discuss as far as he was concerned. He wanted to be together that was mostly it. Okay maybe there were some things that needed to be discussed but he wasn't ready for that now. Now he just needed to be close. Tony was the one who wanted to discuss, he should start. "How are we gonna do this?"

"I don't know." Steve deadpanned, "You're the one who doesn't want me in your life.

Tony rolled his eyes. "This is not what I said. Jeez." Then he added, his tone insecure. "You said you thought things through."

Steve smiled and thought about what he was going to say before answering.  "I know what I want Tony. I want you. I want _us."_

Tony smiled back with pride and affection in his eyes. "I know you do." He said and then his voice faltered and he hesitated, "I just think it would be wise not to rush into things."

Steve raised his head and leaned on his elbows. He brought his head close to Tony, invading his personal space. "I will be good to you, Tony." He whispered, using all his sensuality and his powerful omeganess to convince him. "I could be the perfect omega. I'll do everything you want."

Tony inched away as if he was offended. "I don't want you to. I want you to be yourself. I want you to be that brave stubborn omega all proud of his righteousness that I fell in love with. Don't change for me."

"I'm not. There was always this thing I was feeling as a child. The need to be useful, the need to help as if it was my duty. I thought I was meant to devote myself to the world. I know what this feeling is now. I was meant to serve and please. I want to serve and please you. I want to submit. To you. Not anyone else. Just you. I also want to be useful and help people but I need this to find balance. I wanna be Captain America in the outside world but in here, I just wanna be yours and please you and be there for you to use me as you fit. Let me, please?"

Tony awed and remained silent for a moment, trying to understand Steve's words. "Wow. This is huge... What you're giving me. This is huge. I... I don't know what to say."

Steve leaned closer to his alpha, shifting his body weigh and using it to invade his alpha's personal space even more. "Then don't say anything. Just accept it. Take me."

Tony didn't respond to Steve's flirting. He just looked vaguely in front of him, his eyes in a haze. "I... I can't accept this."

Steve stopped the flirting for now. It was going to be harder than he thought to convince Tony. He wasn't going to escape the talking thing. He sat up in the same position as Tony but purposely got closer so as their thighs were brushing. "Why not?" He asked and stared at his alpha. Tony had a rueful self-deprecating expression on his face. A glimpse of sadness crossed his eyes.

"Because I've hurt you." He muttered, his voice tinged with shame and guilt.

"And I'm partly to blame for this." Steve deadpanned. 

"Don't say that!" He shouted angrily. "NEVER say that. You didn't deserve this. Nobody deserves this. It doesn't matter what you did."

Steve turned to him, "Tony!" He called and brought his hands on each side of Tony's head to turn it so they would be facing each other. "Look at me!" He demanded and pronounced the word clearly and meaningfully with all his intent "I know you won't hurt me. I trust you."

Tony looked away. "You shouldn't. I'm not worthy of it."

"I hurt you too, Tony... " He brought Tony's face back in front of him. "I know you're a lot to deal with but I'm not backing out. I'm up for the challenge. I'm strong and resolved and I'm not giving up on you. I know I could be the best for you."

Tony's eyes lit up with fury. He was all powerful alpha all of a sudden and Steve instinctively let go of him and moved into a submissive position, surrendering to his alpha like the perfect omega he was.

"I beat you, Steve." Tony's voice was pervaded with anger and self-hatred. "You were mine. You were _my_ omega and you trusted me to protect you and I _beat_ you. While you were carrying my pup. I BEAT you, Steve. Maybe you can forgive me, and frankly, that would be questionable if you did, but I can _never_ forgive myself for that. Never."

Steve laughed nervously. "It was barely a slap, Tony. Not even a scratch. Did you forget that I'm a super-soldier? You _cannot_  possibly hurt me."

Tony looked utterly offended. "It doesn't matter. You are my omega and you are pregnant. Serum or not. I shall never hurt you, in any way. I'm meant to protect you. I should never lay a finger on you."

Steve realized that he wouldn't be able to brush it off with a joke. He was dealing with Tony's deeply ingrained guilt complex there. But he did it anyway. "Shame, I was really hoping you would lay much more than a finger on me. Or _in_ me, as a matter of fact." He was only half joking actually.

Tony chuckled and relaxed a bit. "You're kinky." He laughed. "Where is my cute prudish innocent omega?"

Steve smiled.  "I had a good teacher..." he slurred and brought his hand on Tony's stomach, brushing his fingers in the lines of his abs through the fabric of his shirt.

Tony delicately pushed Steve's hand away but kept it in his own and tangled their fingers together. "I'm being serious, babe."

Steve continued with the touch, not being able to keep his hands away. "I know." He said with false innocence but it didn't make it any better. "It was _just_ a slap, Tony. You hurt my pride more than you hurt my body. Actually, what hurt me was the rejection, not the slap. You were making a statement and you had reason to."

"Do not say that you deserved it."

"I did Tony. What I did to you was punishable by death not that long ago. It still is in other parts of the world. I know the world has changed in seventy years but not that much. Look around, Tony.  Most people would think it completely normal and acceptable. _I_ do. Some would even say you've been too lenient with me.

"That doesn't mean it is acceptable. I don't want it to be acceptable. I don't want to accept it as normal. I don't wanna be that alpha and I don't want you to be that omega either."

"You're not, Tony. You didn't know I was pregnant then, and if I was a weak and fragile omega you would never have done it."

"You don't know that."

"Yes, I do. And if you don't believe me then believe _in_ me. I will never let you hurt me or our pup. And you'll deal with this, in therapy or any other way. You will!"

Tony sighed. He caught Steve by his nape and brought him close and he buried his head in the crook his neck. "You're so good to me, Steve. I don't deserve you." He whispered against Steve's skin, sending shivers down his spine.

Suddenly, Steve was struck with a pang of guilt. "I'm so sorry Tony. I'm so so sorry. I don't know what came over me. I felt so unhappy and rejected. If only you knew how much I regret it. I will never do that again. Please trust me."

Tony raised his head to look Steve in the eyes. He cupped his jaw in his hands and caressed his cheek. "I trust you." He said and kissed him tenderly. "I can't forgive you yet, but I trust you."

It wasn't the answer he hoped for but it was fair. He relished in the touch to forget about his mixed feelings and deepened the kiss, feeling hot all over. Tony backed away from his ardor and smiled kindly. "Wow. Calm down stud. We said no sex." Steve pouted but let go of his lover.

"If we're gonna do this." Tony started. "We need to make sure that none of this will happen again, or it will destroy us."

Steve nodded.

"We should discuss the new grounds of our relationship. We should set up new rules. Rules that we _both_ agree on."

Steve took advantage of the fact that Tony was focused on this new rules idea to conquer him again and made new attempts to touch his alpha. He fondled Tony's chest and ran his fingers down to his stomach, getting closer and closer to his crotch each time. Tony seemed to have accepted defeat and stopped protesting so Steve intensified his caresses.

"What is it with you and rules lately? I thought rules and plans were _my_ thing." Steve said nonchalantly. 

Tony slightly pushed his hand away. "Pfff. On the battlefield maybe, but in bed..."

"Oh. I like it that you're gonna rule me in bed." Steve said while turning his body over and lay on his stomach, still caressing his alpha from his neck to his hips.

Tony rolled his eyes but didn't try to push his hand away this time. "I think we should start with being honest with each other. We need to tell each other how we feel and never let unsaid things pollute our relationship."  That sounded fair. Tony looked at Steve for approval and probably saw it because he started enunciating "Rule number one: always be honest to each other. Rule number two: never hide something that bother us and don't wait to speak about it. Rule number three--"

"Rule number three: fuck every day." Steve interrupted, pressing his hand on Tony's crotch.

"Is this really the only thing you can think about?" Tony asked in an exasperated sigh.

 "You're the one to talk." Steve grinned, "You're hard."

 _"Half-_ hard and who can blame me? You've been groping me for the past half hour."

"I'm sorry" Steve apologized with a sheepish smile. "I can't seem to keep my hands away." and he slipped his hand in Tony's pants.

Tony slapped Steve's hand off his crotch.

"Leave me be. I'm an old man."

Steve laughed and brought his head closer and squirmed around while rubbing himself against the mattress. "I'm horny." 

"You're insatiable."

"Blame it on the hormones."

Tony shook his head in desperation but he gave in anyway. He bent over Steve and cupped his face in his hand to kiss him. Steve grinned victoriously and kissed him back, surrounding his alpha with his strong arms.

Tony ended the kiss too early for Steve's taste. He inched away and muttered something which sounded awfully cruel and offensive in Steve's ears. "We should finish this first."

"Later." Steve protested, his tongue still in Tony's mouth.

"Steve..." Tony sighed and then gasped when Steve slipped his hand in his pants again.

"Later..."

Tony tried to resist and protested, "Babe, no." ... "Stop." ... "We said no sex!" Each word being interrupted with a passionate and languorous kiss. Steve grabbed the hard burning rod and started kissing down Tony's neck.

"I didn't say anything..." He slurred in the crook of his neck and went down on him.

When Steve started to mouth his bulge through the fabric, Tony stopped protesting. His eyes shut and he started breathing heavily and moaning. His tense body jerked with each of Steve's touch. Steve was amazed at how much power he had over his alpha and the sight of him all defenseless at his mercy made him hard and wet. He knew it wasn't fair to trick Tony into sex and he knew it wasn't going to solve their relationship issues but it was the only thing he could think of to get close to his alpha again. When they were mating, he had never felt so close to his alpha. He felt whole and safe and home. He wanted that again. Now that they were going to raise a kid together, he needed it more than anything. 

He glanced up at Tony. His eyes were still closed and he was biting his lower lip in delight. Steve laid his hand on his hips, grabbed the brim of his underwear and pulled them down. Tony had given up resisting and looked abandoned to Steve's caresses. Tony's hands delicately brushed Steve's face and ran through his hair. He cupped his jaw and pushed him slowly down on his crotch as a silent command. Tony had a way to make himself be obeyed in bed which drove Steve crazy. He felt hot all over and a flush of slick flowed down in his pants. It was cold and sticky and it should have felt gross but it was bliss. It meant he was ready for his alpha and his chest squeezed at the idea. 

He resumed his quest inside his Alpha's pants and found his most precious treasure. He took his time to appreciate the sight and the smell before giving a first lick. Tony shivered and moaned and called Steve's name while the omega's tongue sipped the bead of precum on the head of his cock. his alpha let him worship the hard rod before he took Steve's head between his hands and pushed his mouth down. Steve was surprised for a second but he loved being manhandled like that and he shivered all over while another warm feeling spread in his groin. Tony had taken control of it and was going slow and steady in his mouth. Both of them groaning and moaning, maybe Steve more. Each thrust Tony hit in his mouth made Steve feel used and dirty and hot all over and he loved it. He let his alpha take control of him completely, entrusting his pleasure to him. It felt so good to feel the burning shaft fucking his mouth and he wanted more, he wanted it harder and deeper and Tony seemed to be able to read his mind because he started hitting against the back of his throat and pushing deep inside making Steve see the stars. It was not the same pleasure but it was bliss nevertheless. Steve was squirming and rubbing his own boner against the mattress in a desperate attempt to release. He was whimpering and gagging in his own spit. Tony was thrusting fast and hard and whimpering Steve's name. "Oh, yeah, baby. You're so hot. You're so good for me. Steve. Aah." Steve felt good and wanted and content to see how much he was pleasing his alpha and he wondered if Tony was going to reward him with his seed. He would love tasting it and swallow all of it.

Tony didn't reward him. He stopped just before coming and sat up in a leap. "On all four" he commanded and Steve complied immediately feeling hot and panting. He bent down and arched his back to present his gapping entrance to his alpha. He was soaked in slick. Tony tear down his sweatpants and stared at his glistening hole, Steve's cock was dangling hard and dripping precum against his thighs. Tony pressed his hands on his waist leaving marks on his flesh. He rubbed his burning cock against the soft rim and pushed inside in one go. Steve cried and trembled in pain and pleasure. His mind went blank and he panted hard, trying to catch his breath. He was so into it that he didn't take long. Tony brushed his soft spot a couple of times and he was done for. He came with a cry while Tony spent himself inside of him.

In a last gasp Tony dropped his body on Steve and he felt the knot expanding his insides and tie them up together. They remained like this for a while before falling slowly on the side. They tried to get rid of the remaining clothes and got under the sheets. Tony spooned him and nuzzled in his neck, kissing and biting instinctively and giving Steve shivers each time his breath brushed the bite mark on his neck. Their bonding mark. The proof that he was Tony's and tony was his and at that moment nothing felt more true to Steve. He cuddled against his alpha and pulled his arms around him in a need to be safe and protected. Tony sensed this need and held him tight against his chest.

"My omega." He whispered half-asleep against his neck. "You feel so good. I wanna spend the rest of my life inside if you. I never wanna let you go. I'll make you pregnant again and again and you'll never leave my side ever." Steve smiled at the post-coital stupidity that alphas can blurt out and dozed off.  

"Sarah..." 

Steve wasn't sure if it was the whispering in his ears or the hands fondling his belly that woke him up but it startled him.

"What?"

"My daughter... We should call her, Sarah..."

Steve felt his heart melt when he heard his alpha speaking about their pup. He could picture the two of them in his mind and smiled.

He chuckled. "Oh you mean, _our_ daughter... And how about Maria?"

"We're not giving her my dead mother's name. That's depressing!"

"Oh but mine is fine?" 

"I thought you'd be happy. You and your mother were close, right?"

"Yeah, but.... You're right. It's depressing... "

"Okay. Then we'll find her another name."

"What if it's a boy?"

"It's a girl. I know it. And if it's a boy, we'll name him Peter."

Steve hummed and tried the name in his head. "I like Peter..."

Tony sighed in the crook of Steve's neck and held him tight against him, the arc reactor humming on his back. Steve indulged himself in the hug and squirmed at the touch trying to have as much contact with his alpha's skin as he could. "What do you think their status will be?" Steve asked.

"I don't know. it's not important." Tony answered half-asleep.

"I hope she'll be a strong alpha like you."

Tony grinned against his neck. "Or a badass omega like you..." He teased.

"As long as she's not beta..."

Tony raised his head and released his grip on Steve. His hand came to Steve's hips and he bent his head a little to flash a teasing smile. "Steven Grant Rogers. You did not say such an offensive and intolerant comment about our daughter!" 

Steve laughed. "I wanna have grand kids! Don't you?"

Tony didn't answer at once. He cuddled Steve again. "I guess... but, I don't care what she is... As long as she's happy." and he kissed Steve's neck before holding him tight and fell asleep again. Steve realized that Tony hadn't thrown him out. He was sleeping in his alpha's bed for the first time. He relished in the moment and drifted off as well, happy and content that his alpha was never letting him go.

 

"You know I was thinking..." The voice startled him again just as he was falling asleep. He got worried suddenly, that Tony was gonna ask him to leave. He felt anxious and squirmed in the bed, trying to get in a better position.

"What?"

"Who is gonna take care of her?"

"Of who?"

"Our daughter. When she's born. She'll need a parent. We can't just abandon her to the nannies."

Steve felt a twinge of disappointment in his chest. Tony was expecting him to stay at home, like a good little omega. He would do it. Of course, he would if his alpha wanted him to but he wasn't expecting this. Actually, he hadn't really thought about it. He imagined that he would pop off the kid and go back to being Captain America. He realized life would never be the same again.

"I mean," Tony continued. "We can't keep putting both our lives on the lines all the time. We don't want her to be an orphan."

Steve wanted this baby. He wanted to be a parent and have a family and raise this pup with Tony, but he was not ready to give up everything for him.

He turned to Tony with a concerned expression. He looked at him trying to find the best words to tell him. "Tony, I'm not ready to give up being Captain America."

Tony sensed the Steve's distress and scooped his arms around his back. "I'm not asking you to. Of course you must continue leading the Avengers. You're our Captain. You're the best. That's not what I meant..."

"What did you mean then?"

"Well, you know... I'm not getting any younger and... I'm just the tech guy..."

"What are you saying? Of course you're not just 'the tech guy'. You're an important asset in the team, Tony."

"I'm just flying a suit, anybody can do that. I'm just saying... I'm as valuable behind the scene as on the battlefield. I'm essentially an asset in the team because of my brain and my money and... What I mean is, if you wanted, I could lay off a bit. And stay here, looking after our baby girl--or baby boy-- and you can keep doing what you're doing best, saving the world. What do you think?"

Steve looked at Tony and awed in surprise. A surge of affection for his alpha overwhelmed him. He cupped his alpha's head in his hands. "Tony, you would do that? For me?"

"Yeah. I just... I thought it'd be great if one of us stayed behind, you know..."

Steve kissed his alpha tenderly before he could finish his sentence. "I love you. You're the best alpha I could ever dream of bonding." Tony kissed him back and held him tight against him. 

They stayed like that all night, embracing each other, keeping each other warm, protecting their little pup. And Steve never left his Alpha's bedroom ever again. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter will be a short conclusion.
> 
> I hope you're going to give me your opinion!


	28. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve is finally coming to terms with who he is.

Tony headed to the communal room where the rest of the Avengers were waiting patiently. Even Fury was there, lurking over his chair, arms crossed and face impassive. He nodded when Tony walked into the room.

"Stark."

"Nick! What a pleasant surprise!" He grinned with false delight, tone cynical.

"I can see you're on time for a meeting, for once."

"I like to be unpredictable." He slurred with a grin.

Nick Fury rolled his eyes and cleared his throat in an unimpressed manner. Tony may be powerful and high-ranked, his Alpha charms never worked on the old Omega. He felt a bit disappointed at that. He liked to think all the omegas would get wet around him. Their was a time when it was true. Now he was bonded and fucking exhausted. Bonding an Omega was a lot of work. Pregnant Omega was a lot of work. Bonding a pregnant super-soldier Omega was fucking servitude. And he wasn't getting any younger. He was more than exhausted, he was drained, used up. God, he needed coffee.

He went for the coffee maker and remained pensive in front of the machine. The coffee was brewing and he relished in the anticipated pleasure of a warm strong coffee. While he was brooding about his insecurities, he felt a strong hand on his shoulder.

"Any chance you're making me one, Stark?" The cheeky voice asked.

Tony didn't turn away from the godly liquid. "Legolas! Good morning to you too."

"Man, you're a changed Alpha. Bonded Life, huh? Makes you do crazy things. What did Cap do to you to get you coming for a meeting on time. I'd never thought I'd be alive to see that day comin'. You look exhausted though..."

"If only you knew, Clint, if only you knew..." He sighed. 

Actually, Steve was a wonder of ingenuity when it came to have Tony do what he wanted him to do. Tony was getting hard again just thinking about it. Who would have thought the righteous Omega would be so kinky in bed? Tony was still dazed, even after all this time. However it was becoming harder and harder to keep up with his omegas' stamina. Steve was already slutty and horny before but pregnancy and idleness had increased his sexual appetite tenfold. Tony sometimes fondled the idea of sharing him with another Alpha, but that was only on his bad days. He refrained that idea very quickly because he would have to kill the other guy afterward so, it wasn't really a great idea. Would be hot though...

"Any idea what the meeting's about?"

"Nope. No idea what's goin' on in that pregnant head of his." He said while sipping his nectar.

Clint chuckled. "That hard, uh?" Then he crossed his arms and leaned on the wall next to Tony while looking at him with curious eyes. Tony answered with a look. Between Alphas they understood each other. Even if Clint was fucking another Alpha, there were things only they just knew.

"What's he doing these days? We don't see much of him."

"Well, this and that... Mostly nesting." And _fucking... A lot. Yeah. Definitely a lot of fucking._

"Yeah, I get it. Must have those crazy demands... Or is it a legend?"

"I don't know if it's a legend or not but I suspect he pulls the pregnant card when not necessary."

Clint laughed. "Oh, man. Cap taking advantage of you? Sounds like him. You're screwed."

"Fuck off."

"Yeah. It's good, though, to spoil him?" Clint tone was soft.

"I guess. He's mine. I want to cherish him. He's my everything."

"I'm happy for you. I'd like to do that, with Nat, sometimes. You know, Alpha instinct. She wouldn't let me of course... You're a lucky guy, Stark."

"Yeah. Who would have thought, huh? Me, finally settling down."

"Man, I can't believe you too are gonna be daddies. God moves in mysterious ways. Must have been wasted when he decided that you two would be parents."

"Hey, Tony protested with fake offended tone. "Firstly, God had nothing to do with it, just my big dick in his wet ass and the magic of hormones. Secondly, we're gonna be awesome parents. I tell you."

Clint turned to him with a huge grin. "I can hardly imagine Cap suddenly becoming the doting father, going mushy mushy with a kid, changing nappies and stuff. That's gonna be hilarious!!!"

"Good. Cause you're not gonna see it. I'm gonna do it."

Clint turned to him, expression dumbfounded. "You're gonna be the one raising the kid?"

"Yeah. Gotta a problem with that?"

"Nope. Not at all. Actually, makes sense. I can totally picture it." Clint's tone was genuinely honest and it warmed Tony's heart.

"Thanks."

He couldn't stop a smile from growing on his happy face. It didn't last though, because he could already smell the sweetness of a pregnant omega and all his senses were on alert. Alpha instinct. It was hard to keep calm when his Omega was surrounded with so many Alphas. Even if they were his pack. He started flaring. 

Steve arrived at the entrance. He paced in with all his glory and righteousness, holding proudly his baby bump. He was all serious and Captain America. Posture dignified and expression unmovable. He dominated the room and Tony thought he was falling in love again. Steve had that effect on him these days. _Mine_ he thought,  _Mine,_ as a surge of pride and affection warmed his heart and soothed his tense body. 

He was wearing his uniform even though he was already five months pregnant and showing. He was stunning. He was back. Back to being amazing and proud and self-confident.

"Thank you all for coming to this meeting."

The Avengers stopped whatever they were doing and listened attentively to their captain.

"What's this meeting about, Cap?" Natasha asked.

"I'm gonna be simple and brief." They were all hanging on his every word with expecting eyes. "I wanna have a press conference."

Tony almost choked on his coffee. _What?_  Although, he was obviously not the only dumbfounded idiot in the assembly. Clint had his eyes wide opened. Bruce dropped his gluten-free cracker. Sam was catching flies. Fury almost fell off his chair which made Tony smirk. Even Natasha raised an eyebrow.

"What?" She asked.

"You're not serious, are you?" Fury protested, his perfectly composed voice faltering and betraying his uneasiness.

"I'm perfectly, serious. I wanna do a press conference."

"You realize that if you do that, looking like that, everyone will know you're Omega and you're pregnant." Bruce warned.

"That's kind of the point, Bruce."

"This is crazy" Fury continued.

"Not to forget dangerous. If this ends in the wrong hears, you could put your child in danger."

"My child will be in danger whether people know about it or not. It's gonna come out one way or another. The best we can do is be here to protect it."

"Are you okay with that? With People knowing?" Sam inquired.

"I want people to know. I'm lucky. I have this opportunity to change things, to make a difference. I wanna let the world know what Omegas are capable of. I'm not ashamed. I am Omega and I have a job, I have a career and I'm not ashamed."

"This is a bad idea." Fury mumbled.

"I'm sorry, Nick. No offense but, I'm calling the shots here. This is my life. And I want to show people that you can be Omega, have a family and save the world. We shouldn't have to give up on having a family for a career. We should be able to do both."

"What does your Alpha think about it?" Fury asked.

Tony was observing the whole conversation from afar, as if he was not concerned. He was as astonished as the rest of them. Steve, his mate, his omega, was glowing. He felt so proud. Whatever Steve says he thought. _Whatever you want baby. I'll be with you._  

Everyone turned to him. He looked startled for a moment. Coffee in hand, hanging in the air. "I think it's always better to control the press."

Steve looked at him with gratitude in his eyes. He may be Captain America but he would never do something Tony didn't want to. He needed his approval and he wanted it to. In the safety of their intimacy, Tony had realized that Steve relied on him much more than he could ever imagined. He was the perfect omega, trusty, obedient and docile. _Submissive._ And Tony wanted to cherish that gift he was giving him with his heart and soul, with everything he had.

Clint clapped his hand. "Yoo-hoo. Cap!!! Go for it! Power Omega!!!"

 

* * *

 

 

Captain America was sitting before a selected audience of journalists. He was calm and serene despite the noisy swarming bellow. HIs expression composed and determined, his eyes focused. The rest of the Avengers were surrounding him. Natasha was on his right, Sam on his left. His Alpha was standing silently behind. Not too close to avoid revealing their bond. He was here to support his Omega, a silent and reliable presence to comfort and to protect him.

"Captain! Captain!" The journalists started shouting.

Steve tapped on the microphone in front of him to silence the room and the swarming stopped. The table was hiding his baby bump.

"Thank you for coming." He started with a calm and composed voice. "Some of you may have noticed that I wasn't there during the last interventions of the Avengers. I have called this conference to announce you that I won't be participating in any Avengers mission for the next few months." 

There was an uproar in the Assembly. Questions were bursting out. "What happened?", "Are you ill?", "Are you retiring?", "How can you abandon us?", Is there a problem?", "Are aliens coming back?"

"I can assure you that, there is nothing to be worried about." He paused and fondled his belly, smiling. "I am simply expecting."

"What do you mean, you're expecting? You're expecting what?"

Steve laughed as the startled expressions. Some of them seemed to have understood, others were looking dumbfounded. "I'm pregnant" he said with a smile.

There was silence for a moment before the uproar came back. Questions were coming from everywhere. Steve answered some of them.

"Yes. I am Omega. Obviously."

"I'll kick your Alpha ass anytime."

"This was unexpected but we are happy about it."

"Of course I know what a condom is. It's a new weapon."

"I don't see why I couldn't. This is preposterous."

"Yes, I am bonded." 

He didn't comment on abortion. He decided to ignore the vile accusations on his recklessness or the lenience of his mate. He kept Tony a secret and did not divulge the sex of their future pup.

"Does this mean you will no longer lead the Avengers?"

"I will continue my role as Captain of the Avengers when the baby is born."

"Is your mate okay with that?"

"My mate is very progressive. I can count on his unconditional love and support. He will help me raise our pup so I can keep leading the Avengers."

Tony took his hand discreetly under the table and squeezed it as a silent  _I love you_.

There would probably be outrageous articles and and sordid comments in the press and the social media the next day but that was something to be worried about later. For now, there was only the three of them that mattered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is it. My very first Fic comes to an end. Thank you to all of you who stuck with me despite the lame writing. Thanks to those who encouraged me and gave me their opinion to help me improve my story and my skills. I hope I did. 
> 
> I wrote a few stories featuring those two during and after the pregnancy, thinking I might turn this into a series but I erased all of them. Maybe I will write them again.


End file.
